by Parker, Ali
I marched over to the door. “I’ll be home around two in the morning. Don’t wait up.”
“I won’t.”
I closed the door behind me and pressed my back to it. Before hurrying to finish getting ready, I took a moment to pull myself together. This sort of behavior from Cliff was nothing new, but it rattled me nonetheless.
We’d been together for ten months or so. After we’d been dating for three months, he moved in with me and Jayden. He’d been evicted from his apartment by his landlady, who was definitely a nutter, and had nowhere to go. At the time, we’d been deliriously in love with each other, and I’d thought it made perfect sense for him to move in with me and Jayden. I’d foolishly believed he could help me; that we would be a happy little family and things would finally be how I wanted them to be.
But at the six-month mark, things had shifted, and I felt more alone now than I ever had before.
I squared my shoulders and went to the bedroom, where I packed my bag. I threw in the sequin top as well as my dancing stilettos, makeup, G-string, stockings, and sweater for the bus ride home.
Then, I threw the bag over my shoulder and pulled on my sneakers. I rushed down the hall to hug Jayden goodbye. “There’s a bowl of chili in the fridge for you, kiddo. Bottom shelf. You just have to warm it up. Cliff has a sandwich on the top shelf. Okay?”
Jayden nodded. “Thanks, Mom.”
“You’re welcome, baby. I’ll see you in the morning. You still feeling up to making muffins together?”
Jayden grinned at me. “Yes.”
“Okay. Good. Me too. I love you.”
“Love you too, Mom.”
I hated leaving him every night, but a girl had to do what a girl had to do. I had no qualifications to land me a real job that would pull in a fraction of what I was making now. As a dancer at Kadia, I’d been making between four and six hundred dollars in tips per night over the last half a year. Some of that money had to go to my costumes and whatnot, but the bulk of it went to paying rent, Jayden’s clothes, and his school supplies. He also wanted to join hockey next month, and I was scrambling to try to get the funds together to buy him a spot on the team. It was an expensive sport, and the money I was making now wasn’t cutting it.
I’d had to up my game.
* * *
The bus ride to Kadia was thirty-seven minutes long, but the stop was only a block away. I rushed down the sidewalk as the sun set and was let in through the front by the bouncer on shift. He was a new addition to the team, and I was pretty sure his name was Jack, but I couldn’t be sure. He gave me a friendly nod as he opened the door for me, and I made my way through the empty club to the back room, where I went to my mirror and prep station.
Some of the other girls were already there. The bleach blond bombshell who sat beside me, Sadie, shot me a brilliant white smile. “Hey there, sugar,” she said. Then she lifted up a little Ziploc bag with two pale blue pills floating around inside. “I saved you a hit. Want half of one?”
I thought of Cliff and how much of an ass he’d been lately. And I thought of how I needed to make more money to get Jayden on the hockey team. “Hell, yes. How much?”
“Oh, don’t worry about it, sugar. I didn’t pay for it. I have a good hookup. He takes care of me.”
“It’s clean?” I asked.
Sadie nodded vigorously. “Yep. As a whistle. It’s the same shit we’ve been using for weeks now.” She poured out the contents and cut the two pills in half. “Ladies, come and get your cut.”
Two of the other girls, Milly and Cassidy, hop-stepped over, wobbling in their heels, and plucked half a tablet from the table. I took mine, and all four of us popped them into our mouths at once.
Usually, I would use from a source I knew a little better—Cliff was my dealer on most days. But he’d come home from work without anything for me the last couple of nights, and I made more money when I had a bit of Zandra running through my system. I was able to turn my mind off and feel the music. I actually had a good time most nights if I was a little high. Reality felt farther away, and for just a little while, I could be nothing but the music and sex. I was desired and wanted when I danced.
I didn’t have that in my real life. I craved it more than I craved Zandra, but I would settle for what I could get.
Sadie tucked the bag into her makeup kit, and all of us settled back into our seats in front of our vanity mirrors. I unzipped my pink makeup bag and started pulling out everything I would need, red lipstick, silver sparkly eye shadow, black liquid liner, foundation, powder, concealer, contour, highlighter, mascara—I had it all.
By the time I’d finished painting my face, the Zandra had kicked in. My skin was warm and tingly, and there was a smile on my lips I couldn’t shake.
“Shit,” I said, grinning at Sadie. “This stuff is strong.”
Sadie fluffed her big blond Victoria Secret curls and glanced over at me. Her makeup was as overdone as mine. “You know I don’t fuck around with my Zandra. I want the pure cuts that make you feel like you’re floating.” She ran her fingers up her arm and sighed contently.
There was something about skin on skin contact when you were high on Zandra that could push you over the edge. It was a good thing Kadia had a “No Touching The Dancers” policy in place because if we were able to come into contact with our male customers, I would have spent many a night in their bed instead of onstage.
I got to my feet, feeling lighter than a feather, and went over to my bag. I pulled out my outfit and stripped right there. None of us girls cared much about nudity. We had quick costume changes some nights, so we’d seen each other’s everything. I put on my black sequin top and pushed my boobs up. Sadie gave me the nod of approval after I slapped on my black G-string and thigh-high stockings with garters around the middle of my thighs. The stockings were covered in black pieces of crystal that glittered magnificently when they caught the right light. They’d been an investment and a half, but they were gorgeous, and my legs looked like absolute sin in them.
“I have to get me a pair of those.” Cassidy drooled over at her vanity. She stared enviously at my stockings. “They’re fabulous. How much did you pay?”
“They were three hundred dollars. Pricey, but worth it in my opinion,” I said, facing the mirror to brush out my hair.
Cassidy groaned. “I’ll never be able to get a pair. Only in my dreams.”
Milly finished doing her hot pink lipstick and sighed. “Me, too, Cass. Me too. Maybe if we danced like Lauryn, we’d have a shot of making enough money a night to afford them. Got any tips for us, babe?”
I shrugged and adjusted my tits one last time. “It’s an art form,” I said simply.
“That doesn’t help.” Sadie giggled as she uncrossed her legs and stood. She looked me up and down and planted her hands on her hips. She was sexy as hell with an hourglass figure and thick thighs. She was dressed in a red, lacy one-piece lingerie.
I smiled and ran my hands subconsciously down my body. I was feeling so damn good. “I don’t have any magical secrets. Just treat it like art. Men love to watch, so give them a show. Use your body to pull their eyes to what you want them to see. Make eye contact. Tell them a story. Let them imagine what it would be like to have you in their bed with them.”
The girls started giggling.
I tried to scowl, but I was laughing too. We were all feeling good apparently. I shook my head at them and looked back at myself. My stockings and my top were glittering. My thighs were taut and tanned, and my ass was perky. I liked the way I looked, and I wasn’t afraid to admit it. I worked hard for my figure. It was my income. “On second thought, forget what I said. Just let the Zandra do the work. She’ll never lead you astray.”
Chapter 3
Caleb
Dani was far from showing, but she had her hands resting on her tummy anyway. She already sensed the little life that was growing inside her, and she cradled it protectively, lovingly, knowing there were things on the outside that w
ould want to harm the child.
She was sitting at one end of the table on Ryder’s back deck. He was on the other. The rest of us, Sabian, Jax, Axel, Derek, and I, were each sitting on either side, looking back and forth between our President and his partner. These days, it felt like we had two Presidents.
Nobody had said a word in at least two full minutes. We’d talked about everything except what we’d been called here to talk about. Isaac Reed. It seemed as though everyone would rather push it to the side and pretend that for now, it didn’t exist. Maybe if we shut our eyes tightly enough, it would be true.
“So,” Ryder said, looking around at all of us expectantly. “You know why you’re here. We have shit to discuss about Isaac. Dani’s been doing some digging and has come up with more than what we’ve had since this mess started. You have the floor, baby.”
Dani leaned forward to rest on her elbow. One hand remained on her stomach. “Well, for starters, we know that the information Derek was given is true. The Hand’s legal name is Isaac Reed. He was born here in New York City in ‘82. He was taken from his parents by social services when he was six because the home was unfit and he was abused. Turns out, he has a younger brother who also got lost in the system.”
Sabian scoffed. “Fuck. There could be two of these fuckers out there?”
Dani shrugged. “The likelihood of two psychopaths coming from one family is incredibly slim. He may have behavioral problems and has likely been caught up in the system, but his name wasn’t flagged for any of the sort of shit Isaac’s was.”
“And what sort of shit might that have been?” I asked. Everyone looked over at me.
Dani nodded appreciatively at my question like this was exactly the direction she wanted to go. “It started off with typical stuff. He was a bully in school—”
“And adulthood,” Jax grumbled.
Dani talked over his interruption. “He was expelled in the tenth grade for attacking another boy in the hall with a pencil. He used it as a shiv of sorts. He went to juvie. More fights and more violence ensued there. Afterward, after he was out, there are a couple cases of animal abuse.”
“Motherfucker,” Sabian hissed.
“As you know, it got worse. His crimes really got underway with petty theft, then armed robbery, then a robbery that went bad, and he ended up killing a gas attendant. Including Jason and Hyde, he has six deaths under his belt with no indication of stopping anytime soon. Unless, of course, someone stops him. From where I’m sitting, it looks like you guys and the NYPD are the only ones who stand a chance of doing the job. And I’m only saying NYPD because I feel obligated. I think it would be best if we handle this on our own. As Lost Breeds.” When she finished talking, she looked up at Ryder, who winked at her.
I raked my fingers through my hair. “So, in summary, his whole life has basically been training camp for the big leagues? Us?”
Dani sat back in her seat and clasped her hands over her tummy once more. She nodded. “In short? Yes.”
“What are we going to do about it?” I asked.
All heads turned to Ryder. He looked calmly back at us. “We find him. We kill him. We bury him. Simple as that.”
Nobody said anything, so I piped up again. “That sounds clear, Ryder, but how do we actually put it into action? We’ve tried to take this guy down before. More than once. Each time, we’ve given him our all, and he’s still managed to slip through our fingers. After we find him—and that’s if we even can—how are we going to ensure we’re the ones who come out on top?”
Ryder stared evenly back at me. “When we find him, we’re going to do things the way I say. No one goes after him alone. For any reason. We don’t take any bait. We don’t make any mistakes. Dani is working with her team to get a lead on him, and once we have his location, we all go in on him at once. He’s only managed to escape us by a hair. Every damn time. And it’s because we’ve been going in only half-cocked.”
Derek looked down at the table. “I’ll take some accountability for that.”
Ryder shook his head. “What’s done is done. Every mistake we’ve made has given us more information. We know his moves. We know he’s a sick motherfucker who won’t refrain from doing whatever possible to survive. We can beat him if we do it together.”
I nodded. “All right. So you’re telling me if he has Dani and you get to him first, you’re not going after him alone?” I was asking a tough question, one that could get me into a lot of shit with my President. But it needed to be asked. There was no sense in making a plan you were incapable of sticking to.
Ryder lifted his chin. “She knows what’s at stake. We’ve talked it through.”
I blinked at him. “So she’d be on her own with him until all of us showed?”
Dani answered for Ryder. “I would be. I could handle it. But we also expect everyone to know he’s out there and make sure they’re making smart decisions. No one should go out alone. Everyone should keep an eye out for him. We cannot, under any circumstance, give him the upper hand again. Make sense?”
I nodded. “Sure, but—”
Axel was shaking his head. “We have kids. If Isaac ever came anywhere near my family, I would not be able to wait for backup. There’s no way.”
“So you stay with your family, and you wait for us to call you with his whereabouts,” Dani said simply.
Axel opened his mouth to retort and promptly shut it again.
Dani looked around at everyone at the table. “That goes for all of you. Ryder and I would never ask you to sacrifice your family. On that note, we suggest you stay home with them until this is resolved.”
“Just stay home?” Sabian asked, sounding a little incredulous. “As in do nothing until you pin him down?”
“Yes,” Dani said.
Sabian looked around at the others but didn’t say anything.
Derek was rubbing the back of his neck. Then, he shrugged and said, “It makes sense. It’s not our usual style, but clearly, our usual style isn’t working. This eliminates the opportunity for him to get his hands on people we care about for leverage.”
“Exactly,” Dani nodded. “And at this point, we need to play defense. He’s a monster. He wants to hit us where it hurts. Let’s make it impossible for him to do so. Ryder and I are asking you to trust us to handle this. We’re not fucking around. We’re going to bring him down no matter what it takes.”
I nodded. “I’m in. And if you need anything, I’m your guy.”
“Thanks, Caleb,” Ryder said. Then, he clasped his hands and rested his chin on his knuckles. His eyes drifted over to Derek, and he cleared his throat. “Moving on to the next matter of business. Derek, the information your friend Rhys gave us about Isaac’s name was accurate. How do you feel about him being back in town? I know we talked about it a little, but now that things have cooled down a bit, I want you to feel him out a bit more.”
“Feel him out?” Derek asked.
Ryder scratched his jaw. “Yes. Find out why he’s here. What does he want? A guy like that doesn’t just appear out of the blue at the most convenient time for you with the information we need to take the next step. He wants something. Find out what it is. Pressure him. Then, bring what you find out back to me. Got it?”
Derek nodded. “Yes.”
Ryder slumped back in his seat and deflated like a balloon. Now that all the Isaac-related shit was out in the open, and we all knew what was expected of us, it was clear he was done with the subject. I felt the same way. Isaac’s dark cloud had been looming over us for months. I was sick of having to look over my shoulder all the time. I was even more exasperated with being worried every time my phone rang—worried someone was calling to tell me we’d lost another friend.
Dani rose from her chair and shimmied behind me to the sliding door. She tugged it open and turned back to us. “Anyone want anything while I’m inside?”
We all shook our heads. We would not be asking Ryder’s pregnant woman to get us anything. We were too s
mart for that. He’d hang us on the back of his door and use us for target practice.
Dani slipped inside, and we heard her moving around in the kitchen. When she returned, she had a glass of lemon water in one hand and a bag of soda crackers in the other. She sat back down beside me and started nibbling on them. When she caught me watching her skeptically, she sipped her water and smiled at me. “This is about the only thing I can keep down at the moment.”
“Oh,” I said rather lamely.
She nodded. “It sucks. I’m craving burgers and fries and all things greasy, but it just comes right back up like clockwork.”
“Sexy,” Ryder winked at her.
Dani stuck her tongue out at him and continued eating her dry crackers.
Sabian stood up. “Well. All this has got me worried. I’m going home to Angela. I’m not trying to be a helicopter parent, but you lot should probably do the same.”
Ryder nodded around at all of us. “Sabian’s right. Get the hell out of here. Dani and I will keep you posted if there are any new developments. For the time being, keep your heads down. I’ll be letting the rest of the boys know the scoop.”
Over the next five minutes, everyone got up and left. All except for me. I stayed at the table with Dani, who gave me a supportive half smile and offered me some of her crackers. I laughed and shook my head. “I don’t need your pity crackers.”
Dani laughed and shrugged. “Carbs fix everything. At least, I thought they did.”
I got to my feet and cracked my back. Dani scrunched up her nose at that. “I don’t need fixing, Dani. But I appreciate the concern.”
She gave me a knowing smile, and I stole a cracker before leaving, just because. She didn’t say anything, but I knew she was sympathizing with me. I was the only one with no one to go home to protect.
As I let myself out, I tried to convince myself that was a good thing.
Chapter 4
Lauryn
