I quickly discovered that she was the midwife who lived on the Kelly Grange estate, and as Hagar ruled over that estate like a queen over her kingdom, the midwife behaved as though she were a subject. I subsequently discovered that if any of the mothers were unable to pay her, Hagar paid for them. Jessie also acted as nurse, for she had received a certain amount of training in all branches of nursing.
She prodded me and questioned me and spoke knowledgeably about my condition. She came to the conclusion that everything was as it should be and that what I had experienced was natural enough considering the time of my pregnancy.
She thought that a cup of hot sweet tea was what I needed; and there was nothing to fear.
When she had left, Hagar ordered that a pot of tea should be made, and while I was drinking a cup of it, she said: " You could not do better than engage Jessie when your time comes. I know of none so good in the neighbourhood; that is why I employ her. She has more sucessful cases than any other midwife I have ever known. If I had been able to employ her for my daughter-in-law she would have been here today."
I said I thought it was an excellent idea, for I had been wondering what arrangements I should make. 'll9 "Then that's settled," said Hagar.
"I shall tell Jessie to hold herself in readiness. It would be an excellent idea if you kept her at the Revels for a week or so beforehand. That is always wise."
It appeared that my affairs were being taken out of my hands, but I did not care. The change in my body seemed to be changing my character. I experienced a certain lassitude as I lay on that horsehair sofa listening to Hagar making plans for my future.
Jessie had not left the house, and when Hagar sent for her, before I left, to tell her that I had decided to use her services, she was delighted.
" Jessie will call on you regularly at the Revels," declared Hagar.
"And you must take her advice. Now someone shall drive you back. And when you get there you should rest."
Simon was not at home, so one of the grooms drove me back. Ruth came out in some surprise when she saw how I had returned, and I hastily told her what had happened.
"You'd better go straight up and rest," she said.
"Ill have dinner sent up to you."
So I went up and Mary-Jane came to me to make me comfortable; and I let her chatter on about her sister Etty, who some months back had fainted in just the same way.
I looked forward to a leisurely evening, reading in bed.
Mary-Jane brought up my dinner, and when I had eaten it she came back to tell me that Dr. Smith wanted to see me. She decorously buttoned my bed-jacket up to my neck and went out to say that I was ready for the doctor.
He came into my room with Ruth, and they sat near the bed while he asked questions about my faint.
"I understand it's nothing to worry about," I said.
"Apparently it's the normal occurrence at this stage. The midwife told me."
" Who?" asked the doctor.
"Jessie Dankwait. Mrs. Redvers has the utmost faith in her. I have engaged her for the great occasion and she will be coming to see me from time to time."
The doctor did not speak for a while. Then he said:
" This woman has a very good reputation in the neighbourhood." He leaned towards the bed smiling at me. " But I shall satisfy myself as to whether she is practised enough to take care of you," he added.
They did not stay long and after they had gone I lay back 120 luxuriously. It was a. pleasant feeling to know that all ms being taken care of.
It was two weeks later, when my peaceful existence was shattered, and the horror and doubts began.
The day had been a glorious one. Although we were in mid-September, the summer was still with us and only the early twilight brought home the fact that the year was so advanced.
I had passed the day pleasantly. I had been along to the church with Ruth, Luke and Damaris to take flowers to decorate it for the harvest festival; they had not allowed me to do any of the decorating, but had made me sit in one of the pews watching them at work.
I had sat back, rather drowsily content, listening to the hollow sound of their voices as they talked together. Damaris, arranging gold, red and mauve chrysanthemums on the altar, had looked like a figure from the Old Testament, her grace and beauty never more apparent. Luke was helping her--he was never far from her side--and there was Ruth with bunches of grapes and vegetable marrows which she was placing artistically on the sills below the stained-glass windows.
It was an atmosphere of absolute peace--the last I was to know for a long time.
We had tea at the vicarage and walked leisurely home afterwards. When night came I had no premonition that change was near.
I went to bed early as was now my custom. The moon was nearly full and since I would have the curtains drawn back, it flooded my room with soft light, competing with the candles.
I tried afterwards to recall that evening in detail, but I did not know at that stage that I should have taken particular note of it; so looking back it semed like many other evenings.
Of one thing I was certain--that I did not draw the curtains on either side of my bed, because I had always insisted that the curtains should not be drawn. I had told Mary Jane of this and she bore me out afterwards.
I blew out my candles and got into bed. I lay for some time looking at the windows; in an hour or so I knew that the lop-sided moon would be looking straight in at me. It had awakened me last night when it had shone its light full on my face.
I slept. And . suddenly I was awake and in great fear, though for some seconds I did not know why. I was aware 121 of a cold draught. I was lying on my back and my room was full of moonlight. But that was not all that was in my room. Someone was there . someone was standing at the foot of my bed watching me.
I think I called out, but I am not sure; I started up and then I felt as though all my limbs were frozen and for several seconds I was as one tamed to stone. If ever I had known fear in my life I knew it then.
It was because of what I saw at the foot of my bed . something which moved yet was not of this world.
It was a figure in a black cloak and cowl a monk; over the face was a mask such as those worn by torturers in the chambers of the Inquisition; there were slits in the mask for the eyes to look through, but it was not possible to see those eyes though I believed they watched me intently.
I had never before seen a ghost. I did not believe in ghosts. My practical Yorkshire soul rebelled against such fantasies. I had always said I should have to see to believe. Now I was seeing.
The figure moved as I looked. Then it was gone.
It could be no apparition, for I was not the sort of person to see apparitions. Someone had been in my room. I tamed to follow the figure but I could see nothing but a dark wall before my eyes. So dazed was I, so shocked, that it was a second or so before I realised that the curtain on one side of my bed had been drawn so that the door and that part of the room which led to it were shut off from my view.
Still numb with shock and terror I could not move until suddenly I thought I heard the sound of a door quietly closing. That brought me back to reality. Someone had come into my room and gone out by the door; ghosts, I had always heard, had no need to concern themselves with the opening and shutting of doors.
I stumbled out of bed, falling into the curtain which I hastily pushed aside. I hurried to the door, calling: "Who was that? Who was that?"
There was no sign of anyone in the corridor. I ran to the top of the stairs. The moonlight, falling through the windows there, threw shadows all about me. I felt suddenly alone with evil and I was terrified.
I began to shout: Come quickly. There is someone in the house. "
I heard a door open and shut; then Ruth's voice:
" Catherine, is that you?"
" Yes, yes ... come quickly...."
It seemed a long time before she appeared; then she came down the stairs wrapping a long robe about her, holding a small lamp in
her hand.
"What happened?" she cried.
" There was something in my room. It came and stood at the bottom of my bed."
" You have had a nightmare."
" I was awake, I tell you. I was awake. I woke up and saw it. It must have wakened me."
" My dear Catherine, you're shivering. You should get back to bed. In your state ..."
" It came into my room. It may come again."
" My dear, it was only a bad dream."
I felt frustrated and angry with her. It was the beginning of frustration, and what could be more exasperating than the inability to convince people that you have seen something with your eyes and not with your imagination?
" It was not a dream," I said angrily. " Of one thing I am certain, it was not a dream. There was someone in my room. I did not imagine it."
Somewhere in the house a clock struck one, and almost immediately Luke appeared on the landing above us.
"What's the commotion?" he asked, yawning.
" Catherine has been ... upset."
" There was someone in my room."
" Burglars?"
" No, I don't think so. It was someone dressed as a monk."
" My dear," said Ruth gently, " you've been going to the Abbey and letting yourself get imaginative there. It's an eerie place. Don't go there again. It obviously upsets you."
" I keep telling you that there was actually someone in my room. This person had drawn the curtain about my bed so that I shouldn't see his departure."
" Drawn the curtain about your bed? I expect Mary Jane did that."
" She did not. I have told her not to. No, the person who was playing this joke--if it was a joke--drew it."
I saw Ruth and Luke exchange glances, and I knew that they were thinking I was obsessed by the Abbey; clearly I was the victim of one of those vivid nightmares which hang about when one wakes and seem a part of reality.
" It was not a dream," I insisted fervently. " Someone came into my room. Perhaps it was meant to be a joke ..." 123 I looked from Ruth to Luke; would either of them play such a stupid trick? Who else could have done it? Sir Matthew? Aunt Sarah? The apparition which had flitted across my room, quietly closing the door after it, must have been agile.
" You should go back to bed," said Ruth. " You should not let a nightmare disturb you."
Go back to bed. Try to sleep. Perhaps to be awakened by that figure at the bottom of my bed! It had merely stood there this time and looked at me. What would it do next? How could I sleep peacefully again in that room?
Luke yawned. Clearly he thought it strange that I should wake them because of a dream.
"Come along," said Ruth gently and, as she slipped her arm through mine, I remembered that I was in my night dress and presented an unconventional sight to the pair of them.
Luke said: " Good night," and went back to his room, so that I was left alone with Ruth.
" My dear Catherine," she said as she drew me along the corridor, " you really are scared."
"It was ... horrible. To think of being watched while I was asleep, like that."
" I've had one or two alarming nightmares myself. I know the impression they leave."
" But I keep telling you, I was not asleep."
She did not answer as she threw open the door of my room. The current of air disturbed the drawn bed curtain; and I remembered the draught I had felt, and I was certain then chat someone had crept silently into my room, and drawn the curtain along one side of the bed before taking a stand there at the foot of it.
All human actions. Some person in this house had done this to me.
Why should this person wish to frighten me, knowing of my condition?
" You see," I said, " the curtain is drawn at the side of the bed. It was not like that when I went to sleep."
" Mary-Jane must have done it."
" Why should she come back after I had said good night to her, to draw a curtain which I had expressly asked should not be drawn?"
Ruth lifted her shoulders.
"Lie down," she said.
"Why, you are cold. You should have put something on."
" There wasn't time. I didn't think of it in any case. I was after .. whoever it was. I thought I might catch a glimpse of the way it went.
But when I came out there was nothing ... nothing. I wonder if it's still here ... watching ... listening ..."
" Come, lie down. It can't be here because it was part of your dream."
" But I know when I am awake and when I'm asleep."
" I'm going to light your candles. You'll feel better then."
" The moon is so bright. I do not need candles."
" Perhaps it is better not to light them. I'm always afraid of fire."
She drew back the bed curtains and sat by the side of the bed.
" You with be cold," I said.
" I don't like to leave you while you are so disturbed," she replied.
I was ashamed to ask her to stay, and yet I felt afraid. But I was so convinced that what I had seen was no apparition that I was certain, if I locked my door on the inside, it could not come again to my room.
" I'm all right," I said. " I don't need company."
She rose smiling.
"It is not like you to be afraid of dreams."
" Oh dear! Why can't you believe me? I know it was not a dream," I told her.
"Someone is playing a trick on me."
"A dangerous trick .. on a woman in your condition."
" It is someone who gives no thought to my danger."
She lifted her shoulders and the gesture was disbelieving.
" I am sorry to have disturbed you like this," I said. " Please go back to your room."
" If you are sure ..."
I got out of bed and reached for my dressing-gown.
" Where are you going?" she asked.
"To lock the door when you have gone. If I lock that and the one which leads to the powder-room, and the door of the powder-room which opens on to the corridor. I shall feel safe."
" If you can only feel safe like that you must, but, Catherine, who in this place would do such a thing? You must have been dreaming."
" So I could believe," I said, " but for the fact that I felt the draught from the door and heard it shut, and the apparition had had the foresight to draw that curtain on one side of my bed. I should think apparitions are rarely so practical."
I was losing a little of my fear. It was strange that a human enemy was much less alarming than a supernatural one.
I had not then begun to ask myself the all-important question: Why?
"Well, I will say good night," Ruth said.
"If you are sure ..."
" I am all right now."
" Good night, Catherine. If you should have any more .. alarms, remember I am not very far away ... only on the next floor. And Luke is near too."
" I'll remember."
When she had gone I locked the door after her and made sure the door of the powder-room which opened on to the corridor was also locked on the inside.
I went back to bed, but not to sleep. I should not be able to sleep until daylight.
I turned the question over and over in my mind. Who had done this, and why? It was no ordinary practical joke. The person who had done this had meant to terrify me. I was not the sort of woman to be easily terrified, but the most strong-minded must be upset by seeing such a vision at the foot of their bed. And I was a woman, known to be pregnant1 felt the menace then. Someone was plotting evil. It might be only indirectly aimed at me because of the precious burden I carried.
One prospective master of the Revels had died violently; was something being plotted against another?
That was the beginning of my period of terror.
Chapter 5
I awoke soon after six o'clock the next morning, rose and unlocked my door; then I returned to bed and fell asleep to be awakened by Mary-Jane at my bedside with a breakfast- tray.
" M
rs. Grantley said you should have a rest this morning," she told me. i started out of a deep sleep, remembering the horror of the previous night; I must have stared at Mary-Jane for she looked slightly alarmed.
In those first moments of waking I had half expected her to turn into a black-clad apparition.
Victoria Holt - Kirkland Revels Page 16
