by M. Merin
“It’s alright? Without a condom?” He draws back to make sure.
“What’s the worst that could happen?” I quirk an eyebrow at him, trying to hide my grin, and he throws his head back laughing.
“Don’t wake Danny!” I muffle his mouth with my hands and cock my head in the direction of the bedroom. As a moment passes in silence, I relax and give into the feel of his hands on my ass.
“Free the girls for me, Rosy,” he grins as he lies back on the rug. “I wanna see them bouncing while you enjoy the ride.”
Rolling my eyes at his cockiness, I move myself over him as I take my bra off. He’s holding his hard dick up, all ready for me to slide down it; my pussy still soaked from my orgasm, I take his girth in greedily. Loving how he always fills me. I smile, remembering our first time when he made a point of finding my g-spot and making me come.
As our past fucks flash through my mind, I ride him harder and harder. His hands reach up and cup my breasts as his fingers pinch my nipples. I start to pull back as I feel drops of my milk released from each side.
Shade sits up, shifting one arm behind me, he loudly groans as his tongue swirls around my right nipple. Cleaning each breast, he squeezes them together, eager to lap up whatever is released. Holding his head to my chest, I’m so turn on. By him filling me. By him feeding from me. From the dirty shit he says whenever he stops long enough to take a breath.
Riding Shade slowly, I smile down at him, his back is bowed so he can remain attached to my nipples. It turns out the love of my life is a dirty talking, tatted, murderer and I. Don’t. Fucking. Care.
He looks up at me guiltily, like he should be asking for permission to do what he’s doing, like this might be the hair that broke the camel’s back.
“No more playing, Shade. I don’t mind any rug burns, I need to feel you cum in me. Please, Shade?” I ask, gripping his head in my hands again.
“You own me. You know that, don’t you, Jessa?” Shade shifts our bodies, laying me gently down before giving me that sly smile of his. “You might think you want it hard right now, but not after today. I’m finally gonna give it to you gentle.”
Shade’s version of gentle brings me to tears. No matter how sore my body is, I plead for more. I love the energy in his eyes, the control he’s using to make sure he doesn’t add to the trauma I experienced today.
His mouth closes on mine when I reach my peak, keeping our screams to a minimum when we find the release we need. Looking around him, he lays his T-shirt on top of my body before walking to the kitchen. Coming back to me, he wipes me down with a wet cloth before carrying me to bed. Placing me on one side of Danny, he circles the bed to lie on the other side.
“Don’t roll over,” I warn him, knowing it isn’t safe to sleep with an infant in bed.
“Shhh. I love you.”
Chapter 18
Shade
Jessa falls asleep immediately. She was exhausted when we left the courthouse and has been running on adrenaline ever since.
I kiss my son’s forehead before I ease myself off of the bed. There’ll be no sleep for me tonight. Keeping the lights off, I double check all the windows, stiffening when I hear a light tap on the door.
I want to swear when my foot causes an old floorboard to creak under my weight. “It’s Jasper,” comes his whisper from the other side of the solid wood door.
“I’ve got five guys in the woods surrounding you,” he says when I crack the door for him. Entering, he sets down boxes of diapers and wipes, then pulls a burner phone and a gun with a few extra magazines out of his pockets. “Michaels insisted on Tabby coming by tomorrow to check on Jessa and Danny, he’ll drive her up the fire road from their place – staying off the main road. Flint will also be by. He’ll bring you a radio so you can hear updates from the guys watching your back. How’s your family?”
“Resting. That was too fucking close, Jasper. Tell me Wrench at least has an idea who is doing this?”
“Wrench pulled in Riley to help him dig deeper but hasn’t said anything on what they’re checking.” Jasper exhales. “Flint thinks Michaels is on the up and up about helping us but your freedom hangs in the balance – what do you think?”
“You know it pains me, Jas, but he’s amped up over what happened to Jessa and Danny,” I reply. “So, I’ll trust him to a point. Just am wondering what he’s gonna do about that ankle bracelet I’m supposed to be wearing.”
“I laid the situation out for Frank, Shade. Michaels met him at your place earlier, outfitted him with the device. It wasn’t an easy ask, cause of what we found there. The Sheriff is aware, but whoever set up that bomb, decorated your living room. They wrote, “A son for a son” across the wall. When Wrench narrows down his list – well, I haven’t decided yet. We’ll either give Michaels that or give him a dummy one,” Jasper says. “The Sheriff has his guys reviewing video feeds from around the courthouse in the meanwhile.”
Danny lets out a sudden cry and I turn before it occurs to me that Jessa will have him settled by the time I get to him.
“Go to them,” Jasper grips my shoulder. “I’ll be out here tonight.”
“Thank you, Pres,” I say, grabbing the diapers before I head into the bedroom to help Jessa.
“Who’s out there?” Jessa asks, she’s feeding Danny and is highlighted by a small lamp on the nightstand. This woman takes my breath away. Her chin is bruised and I know her body must ache, even though she let me love her. She probably only slept for ten minutes, but she’s back on alert when our son needs her.
“Jasper,” I answer as I walk around to her side of the bed and kneel, looking up into her eyes. “I did this to you, Jessa. Someone is coming after me and decided to kill you two. To take away the only people I love. I did this.”
“Then you better figure out who it is and stop them, shouldn’t you?” She caresses the side of my face.
“Jessa, I’m serious. This is my fault.”
“You told me you never touched a woman or child, correct?”
“I swear that to you,” I’m just noticing that my hand is clamped tightly on her thigh and I loosen my hold. “What if there are others that try to come after you two? I don’t want to live without you but what if I’m just painting a target on your backs?”
“Then you best be around to keep us safe, Shade.” She shifts Danny up to burp him but keeps her eyes on me. I look up at her, feeling absolutely helpless before her. “You are not a chicken shit. You no more want to walk away from us than I want you to go. I was terrified today, Shade. But we’re parents now so we dust ourselves off and just do the best we can. Every single day.
“Danny needs us to feel secure and loved. I’m here – and you promised you’d be with me – to teach him that the world isn’t fair. It isn’t safe, and it isn’t kind. If he wants something, he’ll have to be strong enough to get it. I don’t want you to live like you did before we met, but if being that person – right now – is the only way to protect us? Then you need to pull those big boy pants on and figure out how to take down the asshole who tried to blow our son up,” she leans over and puts Danny’s sleeping body in my arms. He immediately rolls into my chest and I feel my heart accelerate.
My jaw is hanging open. I feel like Jessa should have a Scottish accent and blue war paint on her face right now. She never once raised her voice, but she’s right. I’m not the guy who holes up and waits for someone to track me down. I am the hunter.
“I fucking love you, Rosy,” I grin at her.
“Right back at ya,” a smile lights up her face and I lean over her to put Danny back down in the center of the bed.
“Get some sleep. I’ve got some things to handle. It might be a few days, but I’ll check in when I can,” I slide a hand behind her head and pull her to me for a deep kiss.
“Jasper, who can give me a ride? I need to get to Wrench.” I say as I pull the bedroom door closed behind me.
“I had all of the families pulled into the clubhouse, he’d be the
re working anyway. What’s your play?” He smirks at me.
“I need someone to stay in here with my family, keep them safe. I’m going to see what Wrench is doing and try to get to the bottom of this. This is my kill.” I walk over to pick up the gun he brought me, checking the magazines and loading them in my pockets.
“Nice to have you back, Brother,” Jas says before picking up his phone. I stick my new phone in my cut pocket as he works on details.
“Alright. I’ll give you a ride back to the clubhouse. Tanker will stay in here until Russian can relieve him. That leaves four guys on perimeter sweeps, they’re all solid.” He assures me.
“Betsy’s getting pretty far along, he’ll want to stay close to her…”
“He’s my Vice President, Shade. He knows the score and he’ll protect your family like his own,” he grunts and I feel like an ass.
Tanker is knocking on the door minutes later and I go to whisper the news to Jessa before I slip out with Jasper, following him to a truck older than mine. “Where’d you get this rust bucket?” I laugh.
“I needed something no one would look at.” And he’s right. It’s parked along the tree line and could easily pass as having been long abandoned if anyone drove by.
*
“Wrench, we need to have a talk,” I walk into his comm room without knocking. Coming to an immediate halt when I only see Riley sitting at the monitors, with a laptop in front of her.
“I sent him off to bed an hour ago. Marina’s been sick and I think Amy is coming down with it, also,” Riley says, not surprised by my presence. It takes me a minute to realize that Marina is Wrench and Amy’s youngest child.
“Uh, I need to see what he’s been working on…” I look around, uncomfortable talking about club business with Riley.
“Relax, Shade. He pulled me in to help with research this past week. Madda’s on that trip with Roy, so he needed someone to do the busy work. I have a list together – sit over there and I’ll load it up for you. Read through the files; think about the jobs, and flag anything we might have missed or you think is important.”
“Shit, Riley. When did you come to the dark-side?” I laugh.
“I’ve skipped a lot of homework to do really boring research but I think we found a few good leads today,” she says as a file pops open on the laptop in front of me. “I heard that Jessa and Danny are alright? Will you please give her a hug from me and let me know if she needs anything?”
I grunt. Too emotional to say anything back to her, I’m relieved when Riley doesn’t say anything else. She just gets back to work on her searches but occasionally checks the video feeds from around the complex.
“Son of a bitch!” She screeches. Reaching for her phone, she ignores my questions. “Gunner! There’s a drone out there. Scouting the perimeter. It has a reflective surface – expensive design. Get up to the tower and watch for it, wing it but don’t destroy the body.”
Her voice is excited and I cross to watch the monitors over her shoulder, she points to one of the screens. “Shit. I thought I saw something earlier but look at this screen – it went between two different lights and I could finally make it out.” She reverses a tape on one of the monitors and I see what she means. It’s all but a shadow unless it passes in a brightly lit area.
“If Gunner can take it down, what can you get from it?” I ask her, trying not to get my hopes up.
“Depends on where and how it lands. If there’s not much damage, we can watch the feed from where it was released and backtrack it – maybe even download and trace an IP address, depending on the model. But with a surface like that, we already know the operator has deep pockets.” Riley seems really excited, I don’t actually know what an IP address is, but I’ll trust her.
We both turn when the door opens; Wrench comes in followed by Madda. “What did I miss?”
“Riley has Gunner up top trying to take down a drone. I’m looking through…”
“Adam Pistario,” Riley suddenly says and we all turn to her. She’s staring at the screen of her laptop and I have no idea who the person she mentioned is. Her lips are still moving, silently, as she reads whatever is front of her.
“Fuck!” Wrench says, crossing to look at her computer. “From Vegas?”
“Looks like he has a place between Reno and Tahoe,” she looks up, and they both turn to me with wide eyes.
“Who the hell is Adam Pistario?” I ask, I don’t even remember seeing him on the list.
“He imports women from Eastern Europe,” Wrench informs me. “Goes for quality over quantity. Not a major player, but no one to fuck with. Riley – what’s the connection?”
“One of the names in the file, Nick Georgiou, he, um, well, he died in Santa Fe about eighteen months ago…”
“If I’m remembering Santa Fe right, he double crossed that chapter to the tune of four hundred large and they wanted ‘a statement piece’. I believe was how they phrased it,” Wrench looks over to me and I shrug. I really don’t remember.
“Well, I was pulling up articles from when he died and the only time Pistario’s been sighted any distance from his complex in the past six years was at Georgiou’s funeral. Feds had no idea there was any connection between the two, they didn’t exactly run in the same circles; looks like he was identified by some pictures the local cops took at the graveside,” Riley sums up what she’s reading.
“So, what’s their connection?” Madda asks, obviously not having been briefed since his return.
“Based on the message at Shade’s place, I’m guessing that Georgiou was his son,” Wrench’s deep voice echoes what I’m thinking. “Pistario’s gotta be in his sixties. How old was Georgiou when he died?”
“I don’t know? A little younger than me, I think,” I try to remember more about the guy as Wrench calls Jasper, asking him to bring Flint down to the comm room.
Looking over at Riley, she’s studying my face and holds my stare with her own. Something flashes in her eyes so quickly I can’t make it out. Looking back at her laptop, she types something in and turns the screen in my direction.
I’m suddenly face to face with a man I’ve only seen one other time in my life. I nod my head at her, “Yeah, I remember him now. He was mid-twenties when he died.”
Jessa
I wake to the rumbling of voices in the next room and look at the clock to see it’s only four in the morning. Fastening my jeans, I head out to the main room to see Tanker talking to Russian. They both turn to look at me.
“How are you feeling?” Tanker asks.
“I would kill for some ibuprofen,” I smile at them, before indicating the half-full coffee near Russian. “I don’t suppose that’s decaf, but I’ll make an exception today.”
Russian turns and starts opening cabinets but comes up empty on the pain med and apologizes.
“Is there any news?” I ask after I inhale the smell of the fresh coffee.
They exchange a look before Russian answers, “Club business, Jessa. Not discussing it with you.”
“You’ve got to be kidding me! Someone tried to blow my son and me up yesterday! I think that gives me the right to know what’s going on.”
“I’m going to take off,” Tanker turns on his heel and immediately heads out the door.
Russian sighs when I turn my glare on him.
“I brought food and more clothes. Anything else you need, let me know sooner rather than later,” he says, and I get the distinct impression he won’t tell me what’s going on.
“Um, I heard Tabby might come today?” I ask.
“Yep.”
“I need the birth control pill she prescribed me, could you ask her to bring them?” I stare out the window, shy in front of him.
“Of course.” Russian responds. “I brought cards with me, something to do. Want to play later?”
“Yeah, that sounds good.”
“Also, I was hoping you could help me with something?” It’s his turn to look a little nervous, so I tilt my head i
n silent question. “Betsy’s pregnant, you know. Well, I know you do. I’ve never changed a diaper or anything like that and was wondering if you’d show me how?”
“I’d be happy to Russian. Any questions you have, just ask.” I smile at him. Russian was quiet the night we met at the clubhouse and even though I’m annoyed he won’t tell me what is going on with Shade, I appreciate that he’s interested in preparing for his child.
As if on cue, Danny lets out a cry. I wave for him to follow me, explaining each step as I change Danny’s diapers.
“I’ll let you do it next time, alright?” I smile at him and he nods his head. “Now scoot! I have to feed him.”
He pats my shoulder awkwardly before leaving me to my boy. When I finish and walk back out, I find he’s got our breakfast ready.
“That’s the other thing, Russian. When I was pregnant, people would always tell me to sleep when the baby did – that is the absolute stupidest advice out there,” I say, standing at the counter – holding Danny in one arm and eating with my other. “It’s impossible because there are a million things to do the moment he falls asleep. Even with Ellie and Roy helping me, there was laundry, work, bills to pay, showering. God, I can’t explain it. It’s a wonderful combination of loving to watch every movement your child makes, to being constantly worried about them to the point of absolute exhaustion.”
“Sounds fun.” He deadpans before shooting me a wink.
“Ellie made a great point – everyone sanitizes the house for the first child but once there are two or three kids, no one cares if they eat some dirt,” I smile at him.
“You make it look easy,” he returns my smile but his eyes are looking over my shoulder. “Take him to the bedroom until I call for you.”
I move without hesitation and carry Danny directly into the empty closet. Freeing a nipple, I let him suckle while we wait to hear from Russian. At least, that was my plan until I hear Ellie’s voice, I’m cautiously cracking open the closet door as she’s walking into the bedroom.
