by Sammie J
I decide in the early hours of the morning that I am not going to sit around and do nothing or even wait for news from Lara or the police. Today, I'm going to see if I can find out where Noah is and it will start by me making phone calls to private hospitals in the area.
I hear the radio blasting from the kitchen as I finally get my weary body out of bed. I don’t even bother showering or getting dressed. I grab my phone, put my dressing gown on and head straight for the lounge. I plop down on the sofa and rub my eyes trying to wake myself up a bit more and I check my phone to see if there are any messages but I find none waiting for me. Monica starts singing about being someone’s truly, madly, deeply and I smile a little as she must be tone deaf because she sounds like a cat being strangled. She enters the room doing a little dance and stops in her tracks when she spots me sitting there.
“Morning Peppa, you look like shit.” She comes over and sits down next to me.
“I didn’t sleep to well so you're right, I probably do and I feel like shit too.”
She places a hand over mine and I turn to focus on her. “I’m here for you, you know that right? If you want to scream and shout, cry on my shoulder or even punch something, I’m your girl.” Her arms go around me for a hug and I find myself with a mouthful of hair as I try and mutter a thank you to her.
I pull away from her and jump up from my seat, “Right, I need a phone, a pen, some paper and google. I refuse to sit here all day in self-pity.”
Monica looks up at me bewildered, “What are you planning on doing?”
I walk over to the landline phone and search for some paper but there isn’t any and I turn back to Monica and say, “I’m going to ring every private hospital in this town or the whole damn country if I have to. I need to know where he is Monica, I can’t go on like this.” I hold back the tears that I know will come if I let them. I move quickly out of Monica’s reach as her arms come up to embrace me again. I walk past her and say, “I won’t be long. I’m just going to check in Noah’s office to see if I can find a note pad.”
As I open the door to Noah’s office and step in, my eyes instantly close and I breathe in the smell of his aftershave that still lingers in the room. When I open my eyes again my heart stills as I see Noah sitting at his desk smiling up at me. I know what I’m seeing isn’t real and my breath catches in my throat. I reach an arm out for him as his figure disappears in front of my eyes. I have to take a deep breath in and slowly let it out a few times to calm myself. I shake my head to bring me back to some normality. I dash to his desk and find what I am looking for. I need to get out of here so I grab the note pad and pen and leave. As I close the door I take one last glance at the now empty chair and my heart sinks as I think, will Noah ever sit in there again?
When I get back to the lounge, I find Monica sitting there with her laptop and she pats the seat next to her. I take the hint and go and sit. “Right, I have used our friend google and she has come back to me and has listed the nearest private hospitals within 100 miles. I want you to eat something.” She points to the coffee table and I see some toast and a cup of tea. “I have the phone here so I’m going to make the first call and no arguments Peppa, I’m not handing the phone over until that’s all gone.”
I pick up the tea and take a sip and Monica abruptly says, “Toast.” I reluctantly reach for the toast and I nibble on it.
Once she is happy that she has gotten her way she starts dialling the first number. “Good morning, I'm wondering if you can tell me if you have a Mr. Noah Blaise in your care? I understand you can’t give that information out to just anyone but I’m not just anyone. I’m his sister, Lara Blaise. You see, I don’t get on with my family, except for my brother, and all I’m being told is that he is in your private hospital.”
I stare at Monica horrified, shaking my head for the blatant lie she has just told.
“I completely accept what you are saying and of course, I wouldn’t want you to lose your job. But please help me. I love my brother so much and miss him, I don’t even know how bad he is.”
My eyes widen with surprise as I watch Monica fake the emotions she just displayed. “Ok great thanks for doing that.” There’s a pause in the conversation and Monica looks at me and waggles her eyebrows. “Yes I’m still here, no he’s not on your list? Damn, I guess I’ve been lied to. Yes, I hope I find him too and thanks for all your help. Goodbye.”
She hangs up the phone and I slap her on the arm, “I can’t believe you did that. You can’t use Lara’s name, it could get us in to trouble.”
She shrugs her shoulders, “It worked didn’t it? Here do it yourself if you’re not happy.”
She hands over the phone but I refuse to take it, “You’re right. I don’t like that we have to lie, but if it’s the only way to get answers then so be it.”
“Do you want me to carry on phoning these numbers?”
I nod my head yes. She didn’t need any more from me as she dials the next number on the list. We spend a good couple of hours phoning around to the private hospitals. Some didn’t answer the call so I wrote those down to phone the next day. Some just simply refused to give any information out at all but I am determined to try again, so they are put on my list too. We gave up when Monica lost her temper and actually told the person on the other end of the line to sod off. We both sit there in silence for a while and I'm contemplating what to do next, as we aren’t getting anywhere, just sitting here.
I turn to Monica, “I know we have phoned most places, but I can’t sit here and do nothing. Can we drive to a few of the hospitals to ask questions?”
I watch a smile spread across her face, “Good idea and I know the first place we can go.”
“Please don’t start anything Monica. I just need to know if he is there. Let me get my shoes on and I’m ready to go.”
Monica stands, “I promise to be on my best behaviour, but babe, I think you might want to put some clothes on first or you might end up in a private hospital yourself with the way you look right now.”
I glance down at myself and realize I’m still wearing my dressing gown and I haven’t showered. “Give me twenty minutes to sort myself out and we can go.”
She shouts out after me. “Peppa, bring a photo of Noah with you. It might come in handy.”
I take a quick shower and make myself presentable to the outside world and I head back to the lounge to find Monica. She stands there waiting for me, “Did you find a photo of Noah?”
“No hang on.” I walk over to the sideboard and gaze at all the pictures of Noah and his family. A wave of sadness flows through me as I pick up one of him with his arms around his mother and father. I can understand the loss they feel as I’m feeling it too but it saddens me that they think I have something to do with his disappearance. I push those feelings aside as I choose a photo of Noah, who looks very dashing in a tuxedo.
I turn to peek back at Monica, “I’m ready to go.” She walks over to me and hands me a piece of paper. I open it up to find addresses written on it. I smile at her, “Thanks for being you. I don’t know what I would do without you.”
She puts her arm around my shoulder and says, “That’s what friends are for.”
We make our way to the first address that Monica wrote down and quickly find out this is going to be harder than we think. We walk up to the entrance of the hospital it looks like Fort Knox. It has doors that open when you walk up to them and you walk into some sort of lobby. You can see the reception part through the glass and the woman sitting at the desk stares back at us as Monica bangs on the glass. She shakes her head at us and points in our direction so I take a glance around and find an intercom with buttons to press and one button saying reception. I press the button and we watch as she picks up a phone and speaks into it and we hear her prim and proper English voice say, “Good afternoon, how may I help you?”
Monica stands right in front of the intercom and bends so her mouth is near the speaker. “Good afternoon, we are hoping you can he
lp us. My friend here has had a falling out with her family and she has been told that her brother is at this hospital. She didn’t even know he was ill, so it has come as a bit of a surprise. Can you please tell me if you have a Mr. Noah Blaise in your care?”
I do feel bad that Monica has to lie and I get butterflies in my stomach at the thought of being caught out. Her stern voice comes back to us, “I’m sorry, I can’t give that sort of information out without any identification.”
Monica bangs her head on the intercom out of frustration as she knows we don’t have any, “Can you please look at this photo and tell us if you recognize him.” Monica turns to me, “Peppa hold the photo up to the glass so she can see.”
I do just that but the woman puts the phone down and turns her head away from us. Monica continues to press the button but we are ignored and when the security guys turn up, I pull a fuming Monica away.
When she gets in the car she shows her annoyance by slamming her hands down on the steering wheel. “What is wrong with these people? It will take less than a minute to see if his name is in their database?”
I remain quiet and I open the piece of paper in my hands and focus on the next address. A part of me thinks of giving up as I can see we will probably get the same reaction that we have just received from these places too. I glance over at Monica and I'm about to tell her we should go home when she says, “Right, we can’t let this deter us. Give me the address for the next one.” I don’t argue with her as she has that determined look on her face so I give her the address for the next location.
We stand for a good ten minutes pressing the button at the next hospital but no one answered it. Once again Monica loses her temper. I will admit to getting agitated as it seemed everywhere we turn, we come up against a brick wall.
When we get back into her car I turn to her and say, “We should head for home. This isn’t getting us anywhere and you’re about to blow.”
She shakes her head, “One more ok? Let me look at that list to see which place is nearest from here.”
I hand it over and it’s not long before we are on our way. This time there is no buzzer to be let in, we walk straight in and walk over to the receptionist. Monica doesn’t waste any time and once again I find myself surprised by her actions. She takes the photo of Noah from me and puts it down on the desk so the woman behind it can get a good look. Monica points to the photo, “This is Noah Blaise, he’s a good friend of mine and my friend here is his girlfriend. He was taken from our local hospital and we were told he has been transferred here. Would you mind telling us which room he is in so we can visit him please?” At least this time most of what comes out of her mouth is true.
I notice the woman frown and then you see her put two and two together and I know we are in trouble when she says, “You are the second person to ask me about Mr. Blaise today. If I remember rightly, she said she was his sister. And you sound just like the woman I spoke to and you were very rude.”
Monica slaps her hands down on the desk, “Look, it will take two minutes of your time to put Noah’s name in your damn computer, so you can tell us if he is here or not. Why is that so bloody hard for you to do?”
Oh shit, I grab Monica’s hand and try and pull her away but she isn’t having any of it and squares off with the woman.
“I can’t do that. You are not family and you have lied to me twice now about who you are.” She picks up the phone, “I suggest you leave before I phone the police.”
Monica once again slaps her hands on the desk then throws them up in the air, huffs out a “bitch” and walks out.
I glance over at the woman who has put the phone down and I mouth “I’m sorry.” to her and leave.
We are both quiet on the journey home. When Monica parks the car she finally speaks, “I’m sorry Peppa. I didn’t handle that very well. It’s so frustrating that no one will help us.” She opens her mouth to say something else but closes it again.
“I know, but I’m not giving up Monica. I will start phoning hospitals again tomorrow.” My phone rings and it’s Juan, I didn’t even realize the time. “Hi Juan, I’m ok.”
At this point Monica taps my arm and mouths “key” to me and I dig in my jeans pocket to pull it out for her. She gets out of the car and I follow her.
“You’re not coming tonight? No, I understand. He did, please don’t upset Detective Payne. Oh nothing much, just phoning a few private hospitals.” I go on to explain about this afternoon too. “I’m not sitting here doing nothing Juan. I want Noah back.” I hear something in his voice but it’s gone with his next words. “I love you too. I do understand it’s only one night and I will see you tomorrow. I love you.” And he ends the call.
I make out that I'm ok with him not showing up tonight but he’s my rock, I need him to lean against, especially after today’s fiasco. I let out a sigh when I sit down on the sofa. Monica stands in the kitchen door and I glance over at her when she asks, “I take it Juan’s not coming tonight then?”
“No, Cruz has them practising before they go on stage tonight. They are at a new venue about an hour away and he has to be at the police station tomorrow so he said he will come after that.”
She nods her head and turns back to whatever she is doing in the kitchen. I haven’t felt like eating since Noah disappeared. I just didn’t feel hungry and the smell of food is making me feel sick, but Monica pulled a blinder when I thought she is handing me a cup of tea and I find it to be soup instead. I manage to keep it down and I feel the squeeze of my arm from Monica to show she is happy with me.
The rest of the night I use Monica’s laptop to write down numbers for private hospitals all over the UK. I didn’t care if they won't give me the info I need, it is for my own sanity that I'm doing this. I need to feel that I am doing something to help him.
I toss and turn most of the night. Every time I close my eyes I would see Noah lying on the mortuary slab. Then it would be Juan, standing waving at me as he turns and put his arm around another woman and walks away. I wake in tears feeling helpless and so alone. It truly feels as if I'm losing everything good in my life. The alarm on my phone starts going off, what day is it? It’s then I realize that it’s Monday and I should be getting up for work. I'm in no fit state to deal with the public and I can’t ask Lara as she is in the same mental place as I am. There is nothing I can do. The café will have to remain closed for the time being.
A knock comes at the door and it opens and Monica sticks her head around it. “Morning, I’m off to work now, so I will see you later. If you need me ring me.” She moves to leave but then her head appears again, “I’m popping in to see my sister and nephew after work, so I will be late, but like I said ring me.” I don’t get time to answer her as she disappears out of sight.
I drag myself out of bed, still half asleep, and I find myself in my dressing gown sitting on the sofa, with the phone in one hand and a list of numbers in the other. I’m not good at lying, like Monica seems to be, but I know I have to tell a few white lies to find out if any of them have Noah.
I dial the first number and I use Monica’s line about being Noah’s sister. It didn’t get me anywhere. Out of six calls I made, I only managed to get one to tell me he isn’t in their care. By the time I reach the tenth call, I get emotional. And by the time I’ve phoned the twentieth number, I’m in tears begging them. I end up throwing the phone across the room in resentment and defeat. I have had enough. There is only so many times I can hear, “I’m sorry, we can’t give out that information.”
I lie down on the sofa and wrap my arms around myself and cry. I cry for Noah, but most of all I cry for the loss I feel inside of myself, and for the uncertainty of what the days, weeks and possibly months will bring. I guess I fell asleep as I awake with a jerk and sit upright to find Monica bent down in front of me offering me a cup.
“I’m guessing you have been sitting there all day and haven’t had much luck by the look of it. Drink this then maybe a shower, isn’t Juan coming
tonight?”
I peek at her still half asleep and shake my head trying to wake up a bit. She takes my hands and wraps them around the mug and tells me to, “Drink, then shower.” And she walks into the kitchen. My brain finally catches up with me and I take a sip of soup and move my ass from the sofa to the bedroom to take a shower.
When I walk back into the lounge Juan is sitting there talking to Monica. He looks over at me and smiles. Even in my misery, I can’t help but take in how beautiful he is. His smile widens and he shakes his head, and pats his knee, “You’re the beautiful one. Come here so I can hold you.”
I walk over to him and his arms reach out for me and he pulls me down onto his lap. His lips find mine and he places a few soft kisses to them and whispers, “I’ve missed you.”
And I whisper back, “I’ve missed you too.”
He pulls back, his eyes never leaving mine. “I’ve been hearing all about your adventures yesterday and the lack of help you received.”
I glance over at Monica and she lets out a huff, “That’s an understatement.”
I make eye contact with Juan again, “Today wasn’t much better. I even begged at one point but no one would tell me anything. I was so mad, I threw the phone and ended up in a right state.”
Juan’s hold on me tightens and for some reason I can’t fathom he says, “I’m sorry.”
I frown at him, “It’s not your fault and I’m not giving up. I will think of something else.”
It’s at this point Monica stands up and says, “I will leave you two to it. See you in the morning.” She walks away and Juan shouts out to her, “Thanks for taking care of Peppa.” Her hand goes up in the air and she waves.
Juan’s hand comes to my face and I lean into his touch. He runs his thumb across my lips and he opens his mouth to say something but I’m dying to know how his visit was with the police, so I ask, “How did it go with Detective Payne?”
