Engaged.
The word was a jarring reminder.
Lexi was engaged.
The three words were a life sentence.
Sam gave himself a mental shake. ‘I’ll get my secretary to make a donation on my behalf,’ he said. ‘Now, if you’ll excuse me …’ He pushed against the fire-escape door with his shoulder.
‘There is a lift, you know,’ Lexi said.
‘Yes, I know, but I prefer the exercise.’
She glanced at the lift again before returning her gaze to where Sam was holding the fire-escape door open. She gave him a tight little smile that had a hint of stubbornness to it and brushed past him to make her way up the stairs. He felt his body kick start like a racing-car engine when her slim hip brushed against his thigh. It was probably not deliberate as there wasn’t a lot of space to spare. She went ahead of him up the stairs, another bad idea in spite of it being chivalrous on his part. He got a perfect view of her neat bottom and long legs as she made her way up. He tried not to think of those long legs wrapped around him in passion and that beautiful hair of hers flung out over his pillow.
He had lain awake for the last week, sifting through every moment he had spent with her five years ago. From the very first second when her blue gaze had met his across that crowded room he had felt the lightning strike of physical attraction. It had rooted him to the spot. He had felt like a starstruck fan meeting their idol for the first time. He had barely been able to string a few words together when she approached him. Whatever he had said must have amused her for he remembered the tinkling bell of her laugh and how it had made his skin lift in a shiver.
They had left the gathering together and they had barely surfaced from his tiny flat for the next two weeks. For the first time during his career he had neglected his studies. The thick surgical textbooks had sat on his desk opposite his bed, staring at him in a surly silence. And he had pointedly ignored them while he had indulged in an affair that had been so hot and erotic he could hardly believe it had been happening to him. The physical intensity of it had surpassed anything before or since. He had relished every moment with Lexi in his arms. She had been an adventurous and enthusiastic, even at times playful lover. He suspected she’d had a fair bit of experience, perhaps much more than him, but they hadn’t talked about it. Looking back, he realised she hadn’t said much about herself at all, even though he had tried to draw her out several times. In hindsight he could see why she had been so reluctant to reveal herself to him emotionally. There had been no emotional commitment on her part. She had simply wanted to create a storm with her father and had used him to summon up the thunderclouds.
‘Why did you pretend we didn’t know each other last week when you were visiting Bella?’ Lexi asked, stopping in mid-climb to look back at him over her shoulder.
Sam almost ran into the back of her. He felt the warmth of her body and got another delicious waft of her perfume. ‘I didn’t think it was wise to advertise the fact that we’d once been involved,’ he said.
‘Not good for your career?’ she asked with one of her pert looks.
He frowned up at her. ‘It has nothing to do with my career. I wasn’t sure if your sister knew about us. I’d not met her before. I was playing it safe for your sake.’
‘She wasn’t at the dinner where we met,’ Lexi said. ‘But she remembered the dreadful fallout after my father found out we were seeing each other.’
Sam’s frown deepened. It had niggled at him a bit that he had never actually seen or spoken to her after her father had approached him with that ultimatum. For the last five years he had just assumed she had run back to the family fortress at her father’s bidding. Her little show of rebellion had achieved its aim. She had got her father’s attention back solely on her. Back then, Lexi had struck Sam as the type of girl who would never do anything to permanently jeopardise her prized position as Daddy’s Little Girl. She would go so far and no further. It was her way of working things to her advantage, or so he had thought.
But what if things hadn’t been quite the way her father had said? Lexi had implied on his first day at SHH that she’d had no idea he had gone to the States. Why hadn’t she been told where he had gone? Why hadn’t she asked? Or had her father deliberately kept her in the dark, perhaps forbidding her to mention Sam’s name in his presence, like some sort of overbearing aristocrat father from the past? Was it deluded of him to hope she had invested more in their relationship than her father had suggested? Was it his male pride that wanted it that way instead of feeling like some sort of cheap gigolo who had served his purpose and now meant nothing to her? Had never meant anything to her?
‘Your father is well-known for his temper,’ he said. ‘I hope it wasn’t too rough a time for you back then.’
A flicker of something moved over her face but within a blink it was gone, making him wonder if he had imagined it. She gave her head a little toss and turned and continued walking up the fire escape. ‘I know how to handle my father,’ she said.
Sam followed her up another few steps. ‘Why didn’t you ask him where I’d gone?’ he asked.
He saw her back tighten like a rod of steel before she slowly turned to face him at the fire-escape door. ‘Here’s the fourth floor,’ she announced like a lift operator.
‘Why didn’t you ask your father, Lexi?’ he asked again.
Her blue eyes clashed with his, a spark of cynicism making them appear hard and worldly. ‘Why would I do that?’ she asked. ‘I had a new boyfriend within a few days. Did you really think I was pining after you? Give me a break, country boy. You were fun but not that much fun.’
Sam ground his teeth as he joined her on the landing, conscious of the tight space and the warmth coming off both of their bodies from the exercise. Lexi’s breathing rate had increased slightly, making her beautiful breasts rise and fall behind her camisole. He allowed himself a brief little eye-lock but then wished he hadn’t. She was temptation personified. He had never wanted to kiss someone more in his life. Did she know she was having this effect on him? How could she not? He was doing his best to disguise it but there was only so much he could do. He was a red-blooded male after all, and she was all sexy, nubile woman.
He thrust the door open out of the fire escape and nodded for her to go through. She walked past him, this time not touching him. He felt the loss keenly. His body ached to feel her, to touch her, to bring her close against him, to feel every part of her respond to him as she had in the past. It frustrated him that she still had that power over him. It wasn’t supposed to be like this now.
Engaged.
Lexi was engaged.
For heaven’s sake, why wasn’t his body getting the message?
‘Is this your office?’ she asked as she came to a frosted glass door halfway along the corridor.
‘Yes.’ He stood at the door, pointedly waiting for her to leave.
She peered past his shoulder. ‘Aren’t you going to show me around?’ she asked.
‘Alexis,’ he began. ‘I don’t think—’
‘I want your shirt,’ she said with a determined look in her blue gaze.
I want your body, Sam thought. He let out a ragged breath. ‘I guess I can hardly see patients wearing this,’ he said. ‘I’ll put on some scrubs.’
Lexi followed him into the suite of rooms he had been assigned. He wondered for a moment if she was going to follow him all the way into his office but she perched her neat bottom on one of the seats in the currently unattended reception area and idly leafed through a magazine.
Sam came out wearing theatre scrubs and handed her his shirt. Lexi took it from him and tried to ignore the fact that it was still warm from his body. She wanted to hold it up to her nose to smell his particular male smell but she could hardly do that in front of him. It was perhaps a little foolish of her, sentimental perhaps, but she had never forgotten his wonderful male smell. He hadn’t been one for using expensive aftershaves. He had smelt of good clean soap and a supermarket
-brand shampoo that had reminded her of cold, crisp apples.
Lexi put the magazine down. ‘Look, all other things aside, I just wanted to say thank you for all that you’re doing for my sister.’
‘It’s fine,’ he said, his granite face back on. ‘It’s what I do.’
The silence stretched and stretched like an elastic band pulled to its capacity.
Lexi couldn’t stop looking at him. It was as if her gaze was drawn by a force she had no control over. She longed to know what was going on behind the unreadable screen of his dark eyes. Was he thinking of the time they had spent together? Did he ever think of it? Did he regret walking away from her without saying goodbye? Why had he gone so abruptly? She had thought he was different from other men. He had seemed deeper and more sensitive, more emotionally available. Or had that all been a ploy on his part to get her into his bed as quickly and as often as he could? It had certainly worked. She had held nothing back from him physically. Emotionally she had been a little more guarded because she’d been worried about revealing how insecure she’d felt as a person. She’d known how unattractive that was for most men. He, like all the other men she had met, had been attracted to her as Lexi the confident and outgoing party-loving social butterfly. She hadn’t felt comfortable revealing how much of an act it had been to compensate for the deep insecurities that had plagued her. How being surrounded by people had stopped her thinking about how lonely she’d felt deep inside. She had wanted to wait until she was a little more confident that their relationship had a future before she revealed that side of herself. But he clearly hadn’t been thinking about their future. His sights had been solely focussed on his own.
‘Alexis.’ There was a note of warning in his voice.
‘Please don’t call me that,’ she said. ‘I know why you’re doing it but please don’t.’
He turned and walked behind the reception desk, the action reminding Lexi of a soldier going back into the trenches. He fiddled with the computer for a moment before he spoke in a casual tone that belied the tension she could see in the square set of his broad shoulders. ‘I didn’t realise you hated your name so much.’
‘I don’t hate my name,’ she said. ‘It’s just I can’t get used to you calling me anything but Lexi.’
He stopped fiddling and turned, his gaze colliding with hers. ‘Will you stop it, for pity’s sake?’
‘Stop what?’ she asked.
‘You know damn well what.’
‘I don’t know what.’
His hands went into fists by his sides. ‘Yes, you do.’
‘You mean acknowledging you?’ she asked, coming to stand in front of him. ‘Stopping to talk to you in the corridor or on the fire escape? Treating you like a person, that sort of thing?’
‘You probably staged the coffee thing to get me alone,’ he bit out.
Lexi glared at him in affront. ‘You think I would waste a perfectly good double-strength soy latte on you?’ she asked.
His frown closed the gap between his chocolate-brown eyes. ‘That shirt cost me seventy US dollars,’ he said through clenched teeth.
She put her hands on her hips. ‘If that’s so then you need some serious help when you go shopping, country boy,’ she tossed back.
‘What’s that supposed to mean?’
She gave her head a toss. ‘Call me if you want a style advisor,’ she said. ‘I have connections.’
He glared at her broodingly. ‘You think I need help dressing?’
No, but I would love to undress you right now, Lexi thought. She reared back from her traitorous thoughts like a bolting horse suddenly facing a precipitous drop. What on earth was the matter with her? Her fiancé was working hard in a remote and dangerous part of a foreign country and here she was betraying him with her wayward thoughts about a man she should have put out of her mind years ago. ‘Yes,’ she said. ‘You need to buy quality, not quantity. That shirt is not stain-resistant. For just fifty dollars more you could have bought a stain- and crease-resistant one.’
‘Oh, for heaven’s sake,’ he said as he rubbed at the back of his neck. ‘I can’t believe I’m even having this conversation.’
Lexi headed for the door. ‘I’ll get this non-stain-resistant, non-crease-resistant shirt back to you as soon as I can but if the stain doesn’t come out don’t blame me.’
‘Careful not to break a fingernail doing it,’ he muttered.
Lexi stomped back behind the reception desk, right into his body space, eyes glaring, cheeks hot with anger. ‘What did you say?’ she asked.
He looked down at her from his height advantage, dark eyes glittering, jaw clenched, mouth flat. ‘You heard.’
She stepped forward half a step and stabbed a finger at his rock-hard chest. ‘I might be just an empty-headed party girl with nothing better to do than paint my nails in between organising the next shindig, but this unit, your unit, would not be able to do even half of what it does without my help,’ she said. ‘Maybe you should think about that next time you want to fling an insult my way.’
Suddenly the distance Lexi had been so determined to keep between them had closed significantly. She felt a current of energy pass from his body to hers. It was like receiving a pulse of high-voltage electricity through her fingertip. She felt it run all the way up her arm until her whole body was tingling. She felt the shockingly traitorous drumbeat of desire between her thighs. It was a primitive pulse she could not control. The proximity of his hard male body had jolted hers into a state of acute feminine awareness. She could feel every pore of her skin dilating in anticipation. The hairs on the back of her neck rose and danced. A shiver ran down her spine and then pooled at the base, melting her bones and ligaments until she wasn’t sure what was keeping her upright. She looked into his eyes, those gorgeous sleep-with-me-right-now-and-be-damned-with-the-consequences eyes and her heart gave an almighty stammer.
He felt it too.
The air was vibrating with the heat of their past sexual history. Every moment she had spent in his arms seemed to have assembled and joined them in his office. Every steaming kiss, every smouldering slide of a hand over her breasts or thighs, every blistering caress that had left her senses spinning like a top.
Every heart-stopping orgasm.
She quickly pulled her hand away from his chest, stepping back blindly. ‘I—I have to go …’
She was almost out of the door when he spoke. ‘Aren’t you forgetting something?’
Lexi turned back, her heart beating like a hummingbird’s wings as she met his dark satirical gaze. In his hand was his stained shirt. She hadn’t even registered she had dropped it. She stalked back over to him, her mouth set in a grimly determined line. She tried to pluck it from his hand but his other hand came from nowhere and came down on hers, trapping her.
Her breath stopped.
Her heart raced.
Her stomach folded when she looked at his darkly tanned hand covering her lighter-toned one.
Her flesh remembered his. It reacted to his. It flared with heat under his. She could feel the nerves beneath the surface of her skin twitching to fervent life. She could feel the blood galloping through her veins like rocket fuel.
She could feel her self-control slipping.
She moved her fingers within the prison of his, her fingernails scraping him in her panic to be free. ‘L-let me go,’ she said, but to her shame her voice sounded weak and breathless, nothing like the strident, determined tone she had aimed for.
His eyes held hers in a sensual tussle that made her spine tingle. It seemed like endless seconds passed with them locked together, hand to hand, eye to eye. But then his fingers momentarily tightened before he finally released her.
She stepped back, almost falling over her own feet, flustered and flushing to the roots of her hair. ‘How dare you touch me?’ she said, rubbing at her hand as if he had tainted her. ‘You have no right.’
His eyes glinted smoulderingly. ‘I hate to quibble over inconsequential details bu
t you touched me first.’
‘I did not!’
He pointed to his chest. ‘Right here,’ he said. ‘I can still feel the imprint of your fingernail.’
Lexi swallowed as his eyes challenged hers. Her heartbeat sounded in her ears, loud and erratic, her breathing even more so. ‘You’re exaggerating,’ she said. ‘I barely touched you.’
‘One way to find out.’
Her eyes widened as his hand went to the hem of his scrub top. ‘What are you doing?’ she said hoarsely.
The door behind Lexi opened and a middle-aged woman came sailing in. ‘Oh, sorry,’ she said. ‘Am I interrupting something?’
‘No!’ Lexi said.
‘Not at all, Susanne,’ Sam said with an urbane smile. ‘Miss Lockheart was just leaving.’
‘I don’t think I’ve met you properly before,’ Susanne said, offering a hand to Lexi. ‘I’m Sam’s practice manager, Susanne Healey.’
Lexi put on a polite smile but her voice sounded wooden when she spoke. ‘Nice to meet you, Susanne.’
‘How are the plans going for the masked ball?’ Susanne asked.
Lexi crumpled Sam’s shirt into a ball against her chest. ‘Fine … Thank you …’
Susanne swung her gaze to Sam. ‘I suppose you’ve offered your yacht to Lexi for the silent auction, have you?’
‘Er … no, I—’ Sam began.
Susanne swung her gaze back to Lexi. ‘You should get him to donate a cruise around the harbour in it,’ she said. ‘It’d be so popular. Everyone loves a harbour cruise and his yacht is gorgeous. I saw it down at Neutral Bay marina with my husband on the weekend. You could have a champagne lunch. You’ll get heaps of bids. Think of the money it’d raise. I’ll even put my name down right now. What do you think should be the opening bid?’
Lexi faltered over her reply. ‘I—I don’t know … two hundred dollars per couple?’
‘How does that sound, Sam?’ Susanne asked.
Sam spoke through lips that barely moved. ‘Fine.’
Sydney Harbour Hospital: Lexi's Secret Page 4
