The Secret Affair

by Brenda Jackson

  “Then why did we do it?” he countered. He might have made the first move but she had definitely been a willing participant. Her response couldn’t lie. She had enjoyed the kiss as much as he had.

  “I don’t know why we did it, but we can’t do it again.”

  That was easy for her to say. “Why not?”

  She frowned at him. “You know why not. Your cousin is married to my sister.”

  “And?”

  She placed her hands on her hips giving him a mind-boggling view of her slim waist line. “And we can’t do it again. I know all about your womanizing reputation, Aidan.”

  Her words struck a nerve. “Do you?”

  “Yes. And I’m not interested. The only thing I’m interested in is getting into medical school. That’s the only thing on my mind.”

  “And the only thing on mine is getting out of medical school,” he countered in a curt tone. “As far as Dillon being married to Pam, it changes nothing. You’re still a beautiful woman and I’m a man who happens to notice such things. But since I know how the situation stands between us, I’ll make sure it doesn’t happen again.”

  “Thank you.”

  “You’re welcome. Glad we got that cleared up. Now I can continue showing you around.”

  “I’m not sure that’s a good idea.”

  He watched her and when she pushed a lock of hair away from her face, he again thought how strikingly beautiful she was. “Why not? You don’t think you can control yourself around me?” he asked, actually smiling at the possibility of that being true.

  Her look of anger should have warned him, but he’d never been one to heed signs. “Trust me, that’s definitely not it.”

  “Then there’s no reason for me not to finish showing you around, is there, Jillian? Besides, Bailey will give me hell about it if I don’t. There’s a lot of land we still have to cover so let’s get started.”

  He began walking along the bank of the river and figured that after cooling off Jillian would eventually catch up.

  * * *

  Jillian watched Aidan walk ahead and decided to hang back a moment to reclaim her common sense. Why had she allowed him to kiss her? And why had she enjoyed it so much?

  The man gave French kissing a whole new definition, and she wasn’t sure her mouth would ever be the same.

  No one had ever kissed her like that before. No one would have dared. To be honest, she doubted anyone she’d ever kissed would know how. Definitely not Cobb. Or that guy in her freshman year at Wyoming University, Les, that she’d dropped really quickly when he wanted to take her to a hotel and spend the night on their first date. He might have been a star on the school’s football team, but from the couple of times they had kissed, compared to what she’d just experienced with Aidan, Les had definitely dropped the ball.

  But then, regardless of how enjoyable Aidan’s kiss had been, she was right in what she’d told him about not repeating it. She had no business getting involved with a guy whose favorite sport was messing around. She knew better. Honestly, she didn’t know what had come over her.

  However, she knew full well what had come over him. More than once she’d overheard Dillon express his concern to Pam that although the twins were doing well at Harvard, he doubted they would ever settle down into serious relationships since they seemed to enjoy being womanizers. That meant Aidan’s interest in her was only because of overactive testosterone. Pam had warned Jillian numerous times about men who would mean her no good, and her oldest sister would be highly disappointed if Jillian fell for the ploy of a man like Aidan. A man who could take away her focus on becoming a doctor just to make her his plaything.

  Feeling confident she had her common sense back on track, she began walking. Aidan wasn’t too far ahead and it wouldn’t take long for her to catch up with him. In the meantime she couldn’t help but appreciate his manly physique. His faded jeans emphasized masculine thighs, a rock-solid behind, tight waist and wide shoulders. He didn’t just walk, he swaggered, and he did it so blatantly sexily, it increased her heart rate with every step he took.

  Moments later he slowed and turned around to stare at her, pinning her with his dark gaze. Had he felt her ogling him? Did he know she had been checking out his rear big-time? She hoped not because his front was just as impressive. She could see why he was in such high demand when it came to women.

  “You coming?”

  I will be if you don’t stop looking at me like that, Jillian thought, getting closer to where he stood. She felt the heat of his gaze on every inch of her. She came to a stop in front of him. She couldn’t take looking into his eyes any longer so she glanced around. In addition to the huge lake there were also mountains surrounding the property. “You have a nice mountain view in this spot and can see the lake from here,” she said.

  “I know. That’s why I plan to build my house right here.”

  She nodded. “Have you designed it yet?”

  “No. I don’t plan on building for several more years, but I often come here and think about the time when I will. The house will be large enough for me and my family.”

  She snapped her head around. “You plan on getting married?”

  His chuckle was soft but potent. “Yes, one day. That surprises you?”

  She decided to be honest. “Yes. You do have a reputation.”

  He leaned one broad shoulder against a Siberian elm tree. “This is the second time today that you’ve mentioned something about my reputation. Just what have you heard about me?”

  She took a seat across from him on a huge tree stump. “I heard what hellions you, Adrian, Bailey and Bane used to be.”

  He nodded solemnly. “Yes, we were that. But that was a long time ago, and I can honestly say we regretted our actions. When we grew older and realized the impact we’d had on the family, we apologized to each one of them.”

  “I’m sure they understood. You were just children and there was a reason you did what you did,” she said. She’d heard the full story from Pam. The deaths of their parents, and aunt and uncle, had been the hardest on those youngest four. Everyone had known that their acts of rebellion were their way of handling their grief.

  “Sorry I mentioned it,” she said, feeling bad that she’d even brought it up.

  He shrugged. “No harm done. It is what it is. It seems the four of us got a reputation we’ve been trying to live down for years. But I’m sure that’s not the reputation of mine that you were really referring to.”

  No, it wasn’t. “I understand you like women.”

  He chuckled. “Most men do.”

  She raised a brow, not in the least amused. “I mean you really like them, but you don’t care about their feelings. You break their hearts without any concern for the pain it might cause.”

  He studied her for a long moment. “That’s what you heard?”

  “Yes. And now you want me to believe that you’re seriously considering settling down one day, marrying and having a family?”

  “Yes. One doesn’t have anything to do with the other. What I do now in no way affects any future plans. I need to clarify something. I don’t deliberately set out to break any woman’s heart. I tell any woman I date the truth up front—my career as a doctor is foremost. However, if she refuses to take me at my word and assumes that she can change my mind, then it’s not my fault when she finds out otherwise.”

  “So in other words...”

  “In other words, Jillian, I don’t intentionally set up any woman for heartbreak or lead her on,” he answered curtly.

  She knew she should probably leave well enough alone and stop digging, but for some reason she couldn’t help herself. “However, you do admit to dating a lot of women.”

  “Yes, I admit it. And why not? I’m single and don’t plan to get into a committed relationship anytime soon. And contrary to what you believe, I don’t date as many women as you might think. My time is pretty limited these days because of medical school.”

  She could im
agine. How he managed to date at all while in medical school was beyond her. He was definitely into multitasking. She’d discovered most relationships demanded a lot of work and it was work she didn’t have time for. Evidently he made things easy by not getting serious with any woman. At least he’d been honest about it. He dated women for the fun of it and didn’t love any of them.

  “I have one other question for you, Aidan,” she said, after drawing in a deep breath.

  “What’s your question?”

  “If all of what you said is true, about not getting serious with any woman, then why did you kiss me?”

  * * *

  Now that was a good question, one he could answer but really didn’t want to. She did deserve an answer, though, especially after the way he had plowed her mouth earlier. She was twenty-one, five years younger than him. And although she’d held her own during their kiss, he knew they were worlds apart when it came to sexual experience. Therefore, before he answered her, he needed to ask a few questions of his own.

  “Why did you kiss me back?”

  He could tell by her expression that she was surprised by his counterquestion. And, as he’d expected, she tried to avoid giving him an answer. “That’s not the issue here.”

  He couldn’t help but smile. Little did she know it was the issue, but he would touch on that later. “The reason I kissed you, Jillian, is because I was curious. I think you have a beautiful pair of lips and I wanted to taste them. I wanted to taste you. It’s something I’ve wanted to do for a while.”

  He saw her jaw drop and had to hold his mouth closed for a second to keep from grinning. She hadn’t expected him to answer her question so bluntly or to be so direct. That’s something she needed to know about him. He didn’t sugarcoat anything. Straightforward could be his middle name.

  “So now that you know my reason for kissing you, what was your reason for kissing me back?”

  She began nibbling on her bottom lip. Watching her made him ache, made him want to take hold of those lips and have his way with them again.

  “I—I was...”

  When she didn’t say anything else, he lifted a brow. “You were what?”

  Then she had the nerve to take her tongue and lick those same lips she’d been nibbling on moments ago. “I was curious about you, too.”

  He smiled. Now they were getting somewhere. “I can understand that. I guess the reason you asked about the kiss is because I told you I’m not into serious relationships when it comes to women. I hope you don’t think a deep kiss constitutes a serious relationship.”

  From the look on her face, which she quickly wiped off, that’s exactly what she’d thought. She was more inexperienced than he’d assumed. He wondered just how inexperienced she was. Most twenty-one-year-old women he knew wore desire, instead of their hearts, on their sleeves.

  “Of course I knew that.”

  If she knew that then why were they having this conversation? If she thought he was looking for something serious just because he’d kissed her then she was so far off the mark it wasn’t funny.

  “How many boyfriends have you had?”

  “Excuse me?”

  No, he wouldn’t excuse her. There were certain things she needed to know. Things experience had nothing to do with. “I asked how many boyfriends you’ve had. And before you tell me it’s none of my business, I’m asking for a reason.”

  She lifted her chin in a defiant pose. “I can’t imagine what reason you would have for needing to know that.”

  “So you can protect yourself.” He thought she looked both adorable and sexy. From the way her curly hair tumbled down her shoulders to the way the smoothness of her skin shone in the sunlight.

  She lifted a brow. “Against men like you?”

  “No. Men like me would never mislead you into thinking there was anything serious about a kiss. But there are men who would lead you to think otherwise.”

  She frowned. “And you don’t think I can handle myself?”

  He smiled. “Not the way I think you should. For some reason you believe you can avoid kisses until you’re in a serious relationship and there are certain kisses that can’t be avoided.”

  He could tell by her expression that she didn’t believe him. “Take the kiss we shared earlier. Do you honestly think you could have avoided it once I got started?” he asked her.

  Her frown deepened. “Yes, of course I could have.”

  “Then why didn’t you?”

  She rolled her eyes. “I told you. The only reason I allowed you to kiss me, and the only reason I participated, is because I was curious.”

  “Really?”

  She rolled her eyes again. “Really. Truly.”

  “So, you’re not curious anymore?”

  She shook her head. “Nope, not at all. I wondered what kissing you was like and now I know.”

  Deciding to prove her wrong and settle the matter once and for all, he moved away from the tree and walked toward her.

  Figuring out his intent, she stood with a scowl on her face. “Hold it right there, Aidan Westmoreland. Don’t you dare think you’re going to kiss me again.”

  When he reached her, he came to a stop directly in front of her and she refused to back up. Instead she stood her ground. He couldn’t help but admire her spunk, although in this case it would be wasted.

  “I do dare because I don’t just think it, Jillian, I know it. And I also know that you’re going to kiss me back. Again.”

  Four

  Jillian doubted she’d ever met a more arrogant man. And what was even worse, he had the nerve to stand in front of her with his Stetson tipped back and his legs braced apart in an overconfident stance. How dare he tell her what she would do? Kiss him back? Did he really believe that? Honestly?

  She tilted her head back to glare up at him. He didn’t glare back, but he held her gaze in a way that was unnerving. And then his eyes moved, slowly raking over her from head to toe. Was that desire she felt rushing through her body? Where had these emotions inside of her come from? Was she getting turned on from the way he was looking at her? She tried to stiffen at the thought but instead she was drawn even more into the heat of his gaze.

  “Stop that!”

  He lifted a brow. “Stop what?”

  “Whatever you’re doing.”

  He crossed his arms over his chest. “So, you think I’m responsible for the sound of your breathing? For the way your nipples have hardened and are pressing against your shirt? And for the way the tip of your tongue is tingling, eager to connect with mine?”

  Every single thing he’d pointed out was actually happening to her, but she refused to admit any of them. She crossed her arms over her own chest. “I have no idea what you’re talking about.”

  “Then I guess we’re at a standoff.”

  “No, we’re not,” she said, dropping her hands to her sides. “I’m leaving. You can play this silly game with someone else.”

  She turned to go and when his hand reached out and touched her arm, sharp spikes of blood rushed through her veins, filling her pores, drenching the air she was breathing with heated desire. And what on earth was that hunger throbbing inside of her at the juncture of her thighs? And what were those slow circles he was making on her arm with his index finger? She expelled a long deep breath and fought hard to retain control of her senses.

  Jillian wanted to snatch her arm away but found she couldn’t. What kind of spell had he cast on her? Every hormone in her body sizzled, hissed and surged with a need she’d never felt before. She couldn’t deny the yearning pulsing through her even if she wanted to.

  “You feel it, don’t you, Jillian? It’s crazy, I know, and it’s something I can’t explain, but I feel it each and every time I’m within a few feet of you. As far as I’m concerned, Pam and Dillon are the least of our worries. Figuring out just what the hell is going on between us should be at the top of the agenda. You can deny it as long as you want, but that won’t help. You need to admit it like I
have.”

  She did feel it and a part of her knew there was real danger in admitting such a thing. But another part knew he was right. With some things it was best to admit there was a problem and deal with it. Otherwise, she would lay awake tonight and regret not doing so.

  His hand slowly traveled up her arm toward her lips. There he cradled her mouth in the palm of his hands. “And whatever it is has me wanting to taste you and has you wanting to taste me. It has me wanting to lick your mouth dry and you wanting to lick mine in the same way.”

  He paused a moment and when he released a frustrated breath she knew that whatever this “thing” was between them, he had tried fighting it, as well. But he had given up the fight and was now ready to move to the next level, whatever that was.

  “I need to taste you, Jillian,” he said.

  As much as she wished otherwise, there was a deep craving inside of her to taste him, too. Just one more time. Then she would walk away, mount her horse and ride off like the devil himself was after her. But for now she needed this kiss as much as she needed to breathe.

  She saw him lowering his head and she was poised for the exact moment when their mouths would connect. She even parted her lips in anticipation. His mouth was moving. He was whispering something but instead of focusing on what he was saying, her gaze was glued to the erotic movement of his lips. And the moment his mouth touched hers she knew she had no intention of turning back.

  * * *

  Nothing could have prepared Aidan for the pleasure that radiated through his body. How could she arouse him like no other woman could? Instead of getting bogged down in the mystery of it all, he buried his fingers in her hair, holding her in place while his mouth mated hungrily with hers.

  And she was following his lead, using her tongue with the same intensity and hunger as he was using his. It was all about tasting, and they were tasting each other with a greed that had every part of his body on fire.

  He felt it, was in awe of it. In every pore, in every nerve ending and deep in his pulse, he felt it. Lowering his hand from her hair he gently gripped her around the waist and, with their mouths still locked, he slowly maneuvered her backward toward the tree he’d leaned against earlier. When her back rested against the trunk, her thighs parted and he eased between them, loving the feel of his denim rubbing against hers.