by Sera, Drew
“Colin, observe. She’s safe. Evan won’t hurt her. You’ve said yourself that in order for you to help a sub, you have to stand back and observe. How is she with Anthony?” I started to laugh at that. She was at ease with Anthony, most of the time. “Send him over and you observe.”
He was right. For some reason though, I can’t seem to think straight around Sydney. I knew Anthony couldn’t hear Blake and I, but he was on his way over to the patio table. He took up the empty chair on Sydney’s left and she visibly relaxed. Her legs stopped bouncing the second he sat beside her and she leaned closer towards his chair. Anthony put his arm on the back of her chair and grabbed a bag of M&M’s from the candy bowl. He poured the candy in his hand and held it out for Sydney. She looked up at him, took some candy and smiled. Anthony joined the conversation with Gina and Evan and Sydney even contributed to it some.
“That was insightful,” Blake said with a smirk on his face.
I could tell that he was even taken by surprise at the interactions between Sydney and Anthony. Everyone ate at the patio table and kept the conversations light and away from anything negative.
Evan certainly tried opening conversations up with Sydney. Sydney would talk with him and answered his questions, but she was so shy. I began picturing Evan and Sydney scening together. He wouldn’t hurt her, I knew that much. But I wasn’t sure if there was much chemistry there. I couldn’t dwell on it anymore. Not yet at least. Right now, she wasn’t near the point to being able to scene with anyone.
“Sir, may Sydney and I go paint ours nails?” Gina asked Matt.
Matt told her yes and then motioned with his head towards me and Gina sweetly asked me if it was all right. Of course it was. Once the girls disappeared inside Seth gave Matt a rough time.
“You let Gina carry shit around in her purse to paint her nails?” Seth teased. It generated some laughs and smiles until Matt made us feel like shit.
“Yes. Before we came over Gina asked me if I thought it would make Sydney feel better to have her nails done. It’s been a pretty shitty week or so for her. So yeah, I let Gina bring the stuff over.” Matt leaned back in his chair and smiled at us, silently daring anyone to say anything.
“Thanks Matt. I don’t think she’s had a very easy time in quite a while. I’m glad Gina has been around.”
Tones quickly changed once everyone knew the girls would be inside for a while.
“Any word from the police on catching this fucker?” Will asked.
“No, nothing new. Police are working on it,” I said and looked around at my friends. They were all concerned and worried about her too. I think once they saw Sydney’s bandages on her wrists, the enormity of what had happened to her sunk in.
“How is she doing, Colin?” Seth asked.
“She’s doing as well as can probably be expected.” I paused as I quickly thought how much I really wanted to share. These guys were my friends and were concerned. “Sydney is used to not having anyone around to help her with anything. So it’s been somewhat of a challenge to get her to tell me if she’s in pain or needs something. She’s afraid she will be an inconvenience or a bother.”
“Has she talked about anything in specific?” Evan inquired. I shook my head and looked over at Anthony.
“Sydney needs to start talking. It’ll help her. She has horrible nightmares.” I caught Matt’s concerned look. I knew he’d talk to me about whatever he was thinking once everyone else left. It wasn’t much longer before the other guys left leaving Matt, Anthony and I outside.
The three of us sat quietly for a while. The patio was peaceful and I began thinking about how relaxing it will be for Sydney.
“How bad are the nightmares, Col?” Matt asked as he leaned forward to rest his arms on his legs.
“Bad.” I looked over at Anthony and then back to Matt. “She sometimes says things. Mostly broken sentences and I can’t really make anything out of it. But if Anthony is here he’ll try to wake her up and she thinks he’s an attacker or something and she pushes and fights against him. Then when she realizes she’s safe and he’s not the asshole, she cries. It’s sad.”
“She’s scared, Col. She’s in an unfamiliar house, strange room and two very dominant males with her. It’s a lot for her to process right now. She’s probably not had anyone to comfort her through this stuff before. So having you and Anthony around is obviously a shock. Now all of a sudden, she’s got you two trying to help and to get her to talk about things and it’s overwhelming to her system. It’s easier for her system to shut down, so to speak, and push it away rather than open up to you guys.”
The three of us were quiet for a bit and Matt stood up and said that I needed to work with her to get her talking. He offered to help, which is exactly what I may need. Matt is a trained counselor and should be able to shed some light on a lot of what she’s dealing with.
When Matt and Gina left, Anthony helped me change Sydney’s bandages and apply ointments to her cuts and wounds. Seeing the physical wounds angers me greatly but I keep it tucked away. She doesn’t need to see that. As it got closer to bedtime I could see her anxiety build.
“What are you nervous about, Sydney?” I sat down and asked her. She was upset and worried over something.
“I don’t want to have a nightmare.”
Her bottom lip quivered and then a few tears spilled. She quickly wiped them away and looked down. I tilted her chin upward so she’d look at me.
“Baby, if I could do something to keep you from having a nightmare, I would.”
“Will you stay with me?” I nodded. “Both of you?”
I looked over at Anthony and he nodded that he’d stay. He was willing to do anything he could to help her. It was sweet. I know that Sydney has found comfort in him and she trusts him. Her healing will hinge a lot on him.
We got ready for bed and I kissed her forehead. She wasn’t feeling well but even so, Anthony still got her to smile.
“Fine. If you get her forehead, I get her cheeks.” He leaned over and kissed each of her cheeks.
Sydney smiled and blushed as she settled on her side so that she could hold Anthony’s sleeve. As I drifted off to sleep, I couldn’t help but think about how Sydney was going to do if Anthony wasn’t here everyday.
1:30 a.m. brought Sydney a nightmare again. She writhed around in the bed saying fragments of sentences. It pains me to hear those things from her.
“Fire…stop…please…fire.” That’s what woke Anthony and I up. By the time he sat up and had her in his arms and I had the lights on, we had heard some additional mumblings about a belt. She had been pushing against Anthony again and I could tell that she felt guilty about it. He tried to tell her not to worry about it, but she couldn’t accept that he wasn't taking it personally. She needs to get some of this shit out in the air.
Chapter 32
Saturday, November 2nd
Colin
Sydney had a follow up appointment Saturday with Matt at his office. Matt and a few other doctors had a general medicine practice close to our house. He only worked there twice a week and worked in the emergency room three days a week. Luckily it was close to the house and we didn’t have to drive too far. Sydney was nervous though about going back to be examined. I understood though. She was scared and vulnerable.
Since Anthony is able to calm her and keep her smiling I asked him if he’d go too. He laughed and told me that he had already put it on his calendar in his phone as a reminder as soon as Matt made the appointment. Sydney was definitely pulling a side out of Anthony that Matt and I haven’t seen.
Anthony sat in the waiting area with Sydney while I went up to the front desk. They gave me a clipboard and some forms and went to go tell Matt we were here. Anthony had his arm around the back of her chair and was stroking her shoulder casually with his thumb. Sydney was nervous; her knees were bouncing and she had her fingers twisted and curled around one another. I put my hand over her hands and looked in her eyes.
“Baby
, please try to relax. Matt will be as gentle as possible.”
She nodded and went back to looking at the floor.
“Should I fill out those papers, Colin?”
“Baby, just relax. You don’t have to hold everything up all the time. I have my own business and am capable of filling out a patient information card.”
“Sorry, I didn’t mean that you weren’t capable. I just didn’t want to bother you.”
This girl. I began filling out her information as she dictated it to me. She started to get more nervous and anxious for some reason though.
“I can fill the rest of it out.” She reached for the clipboard and I moved it out of her reach and met her eyes.
“So can I.”
“Here, let me help,” Anthony suddenly interjected. He reached over and laced his fingers between hers and pulled her hands to rest on his thigh. “Problem solved, sunshine.” He brought her hand up to his mouth and kissed it, then set it back on his thigh.
I smiled and went about my business of filling out her information card. As I took the clipboard back to the desk, a nurse and Matt appeared in the door and called for Sydney. I waited by the desk and watched Anthony guide her through the maze of chairs with her hand still in his. I knew Matt noticed.
We went to one of the exam rooms and Sydney sat up on the exam table. Anthony and I stayed very close to Sydney and the nurse said she was going to get a few vitals like taking her temperature and weight.
“I’ll take care of those and will let you know if we need anything further,” Matt said to the nurse.
He was politely dismissing her. I had nothing against the nurse, but I knew that Sydney was a nervous wreck anyways and that the more people we introduced to her body, the worse she’d get. Matt recognized that as well and just kept it so that he was the only one who had to touch her medically.
Matt motioned for her to step up on the scale to take her weight.
“Did you eat all of those M&M’s in that candy bowl yet?” He teased her while he moved the bar.
She smiled but said she hadn’t eaten them all yet. I told him to give her a few days.
“112 pounds,” Matt announced and wasn’t afraid to tell her that he thought she was underweight for her height. “I shouldn’t see your ribs, Sydney. You need more weight on you, okay?”
Sydney nodded but I could tell she was uncomfortable with the discussion. If I knew Matt though, he’d press for more info. And he did.
“Are you one of these young women who worry about their weight and either exercise like crazy or eat next to nothing?”
Sydney’s face got red and then she shook her head. She began pulling on her fingers and was clearly uncomfortable with the topic.
“Then what is it, Sydney? Lightning metabolism?” Matt asked.
Anthony pulled one of her hands over into his hand to keep her from hurting her fingers again and he looked up at Matt and I and shook his head. I frowned at him not understanding what he was trying to convey. Sydney’s head was hung and she was looking at the ground so she couldn’t see our silent conversation. Anthony held his right hand out to his side and made a money motion with his fingers.
Fuck. I closed my eyes and nodded. I understood now. In the past week, I’ve learned a little about Sydney’s financial struggles. She lived downtown in a run down old studio apartment. She didn’t have a car and from what Anthony had told me from his visit the night of the party was that she had little. Food obviously fell into this category. I glanced at Matt and knew that he picked up on it too. I prayed that he’d be mindful and gentle about where he took that conversation now.
“Since you’re staying with Colin for a while, I expect you to take advantage of his pantry.”
I’d see to it that she eats more. I’d get a list to my housekeeper so she can make sure things are well stocked that Sydney likes.
“Okay, I want you to change into this gown and we’ll wait outside the door for a few minutes.”
Sydney nodded and we left her some privacy to change. I leaned against the wall across from her door and Matt reiterated that I needed to make sure she put some weight on. I thought back to that tiny apartment and then the image changed from a small, empty kitchen to her mangled body on the floor.
When we re-entered the room Sydney was in the gown and sitting on the far end of the exam table near the pillow. Her body language spoke volumes to me. Actually, I can read Sydney’s body language very easily.
She did well and even talked some while Matt took a look at all her cuts on her back. He had her lie down and told her he needed to check the wounds on her chest and abdomen. She blinked slowly and when she opened her eyes, they seemed distant. Matt untied the gown in the back and pulled it forward exposing everything from her neck to her hipbones.
I could tell that she was scared. Her body was stiff and she tried to hold herself tightly. Next to her thighs were her balled up hands with white knuckles.
“I’m going to push and feel around on your abdomen, Sydney and I want you to tell me when it hurts and I’ll stop.”
Anthony stepped closer to her and uncurled her fingers and held her hand. Her stomach had heavy, dark bruising on it. I know it hurts her a lot. Her lips were quivering and hands shook. I looked in her eyes and saw how watery they were. This girl was breaking my heart. I looked up at Anthony and saw how concerned he was. Matt began feeling around her abdomen and ribs and it caused her pain. Her head rolled to the side towards me and she tried to bend and curl up. I went back to watching Matt push around on her stomach.
“Matt, ease up, man,” Anthony calmly said.
Matt and I both looked up at her face. Her eyes were tightly shut and tears were spilling down her cheeks. She had Anthony’s fingers squeezed in her hands and she was biting her lip.
“It’s okay. You can keep going,” Sydney barely got out. She was in a lot of pain and I looked over at Matt.
“Sydney, I thought you were going to tell me when it hurt. Remember? I would have stopped. Why didn’t you say anything, sweetheart?”
“It’s okay. You needed to do something. I can take it.” Her voice was near the breaking point though.
“No, sit up sweetheart.” Matt gave her leg a pat and then Anthony helped her sit up.
“Sydney, do you remember what happened to your abdomen? Did he punch you there or hit you with something?”
“He kicked me. Howard likes to kick me.”
Matt nodded and while she was sitting upright he put some medicated lotion on her hips. They’re really chapped and were almost a pinkish color. Soon Matt finished and we talked more about continuing to clean and care for her wounds.
“Okay, Sydney. Most of your wounds are healing up nicely. You guys have been taking good care and cleaning them. Keep that up. Is there anything that you want to discuss or go over? Anything causing you more pain or bothering you?”
“No, I’m okay.”
Matt crossed his arms and looked at Anthony and I. I knew he was trying to decide if he should call her out on that. He knew she wouldn’t ask for help on her own. She’d deal with a headache all day before she’d ask for ibuprofen. I’d work on that with her. Matt decided to drop it and he left to go get some bandages for us to take home.
Anthony moved to stand in front of her the second Matt left the room. He still had her hand in his and reached up to touch her cheek.
“I’m proud of you, sunshine. Now, where the heck did you put your clothes?”
Anthony and I were looking around and she pointed to the chair in the corner. She hadn’t set anything on the chair. Instead, everything was folded neatly and placed on top of her shoes under the chair on the floor. I went to retrieve them and handed things to Anthony to help her. My mind was running a mile a minute as I began analyzing her putting her stuff on the floor. Out of sight and out of mind. Sydney was a pro at trying to be unseen and unheard. This, I would work on too. Anthony headed straight to the car with Sydney while I stayed back and talked to Matt for
a few minutes.
“I’ll call you later to check on her.” Matt paused then looked at me. “That fucking asshole deserves to rot in hell for what he did to that girl.”
“I know. Trust me, I know.” I glanced over at Anthony helping her into the car.
“Tell Anth to get some sleep,” Matt advised. I knew Anthony was dead tired. I’ve had him running around all this week and last week.
I got in my car and I turned to face her. She looked sad, embarrassed and her hands were twisted up in each other.
“Baby, you get to pick where we go for lunch,” I told her. She brought her head up to look at me and smiled. Food. I felt an ache in my chest as I thought back to the most likely reason for her being underweight.
“Can we go to McDonald’s?”
“Absolutely, baby.”
I started the car and we headed in that direction. I’d give this girl the world. If she wanted McDonald’s, then she’d get that.
Anthony and I ordered first as she was still trying to decide what she wanted. She studied the menu with intensity that I’ve never seen spent on a fast food menu before. It was like she was afraid to make a decision or make the wrong decision. This was a common trait in many submissives that I’ve worked with.
“May I have some Chicken McNuggets?” She didn’t order them, but asked me if she could.
“You may. Would you like some french fries and something to drink?”
