“So are you,” Ethan said in a low voice, catching her glance. “Not everyone spends their free time or standby time finding the right size of shoes for a little pair of feet.”
“I have a soft spot for children. It was fun today, Ethan. Thanks for inviting me along.”
He smiled a little, holding her shadowed gaze. “I’ll put you on my list of people who like giving back to others.”
Swallowing hard, Sarah stared deeply into his gray eyes. She felt such strength and confidence around Ethan. Wanted it. Wanted him. “I’m in a quandary,” she whispered. “About you.”
“Me?”
“Yes.” She sighed, frustrated. “You might as well know I’m gun-shy of men in general, but I think you already knew that.” Frowning, Sarah stared down at her hands in her lap. “I’ve good reason not to trust them….”
Ethan heard the pain in her whispered words, saw it in her face. He sat for a moment, going over their previous conversations. “It has to do with Bill and Marge Caldwell?” he probed. Instantly, her lower lip trembled and she refused to meet his eyes. If Ethan hadn’t seen her in action during the medevac rescue of those two wounded Marines, he would not have believed her shy response to his question. Sarah was bold and courageous as a pilot. Yet, here with him, a mere shadow of herself. As if… He dragged in a deep breath, hoping he was wrong about his sudden realization about her. His heart squeezed with pain, but it was for Sarah, not for himself. He felt as if someone had suddenly hit him in the chest. As he put all her conversations together, his stomach rolled with nausea. As a child, she’d been sexually abused by Bill Caldwell. He couldn’t speak.
Moving her damp fingers, twisting them, Sarah finally said, “Yes.” The word came out flat. Lifeless.
Ethan’s chest tightened. He reached over, gently cupping her shoulders and turning her toward him. Sarah didn’t stiffen. Didn’t resist. For that, he was grateful as he tried to catch her lowered gaze. “Look at me,” he rasped, lifting her chin with his finger. There was such anguish in her blue eyes. Indecision, an internal war, was going on inside her. Now Ethan thought he understood why. “You can trust me, Sarah. You’re an incredible person, and I want to know you better.”
Trust. Well, that was it, wasn’t it? Trusting a man with herself? Not being hurt by them again? Her skin tingled where he’d lightly touched her chin, forcing her to meet his narrowed eyes. Her flesh warmed beneath his hand resting lightly on her shoulder. They were so close to one another. Sarah ached to kiss this man. Ethan had never done anything but protect her.
Her throat tightened as she lifted her hand and barely grazed Ethan’s bearded cheek. His eyes grew more narrow as her fingertips lingered there for just a moment. She felt him tense. Her breath became shallower. She’d never craved intimacy with a man until now. And she sensed that he would be gentle with her. Pushing beyond her fear, Sarah leaned up, tilting her head and closing her eyes as her lips brushed his.
Heat exploded through Ethan as her full lips tentatively touched his mouth. Sarah was like a frightened animal, excruciatingly hesitant and unsure. His hands tightened around her shoulders, drawing her closer. He wanted to drag Sarah hard against him and kiss her senseless, but Ethan knew it would scare her off. His lower body hardened painfully and he wanted to groan, take her completely and fill her with himself. His heart beating hard in his chest screamed at him to do the opposite. Her mouth pressed softly against his, as if shyly asking him to participate, to return her risk of reaching out to trust him.
Sarah’s fear melted away as Ethan curved his mouth over hers, taking her gently, moving slowly across her wet lips, savoring her. His mouth was tender, coaxing her to join in their celebration of one another. His calloused fingers traced the slope of her cheek, deepening their kiss. She felt flowing fire anchor deep into her womb as his lips took hers, his breath uneven against her cheek. Heart hammering, she slipped her hands over his shoulders. Instantly, she felt his muscles flex, tense, and she heard him groan. Wanting more, she strained against him, her breasts just meeting the wall of his powerful chest. Tiny flames licked through her, tightening her breasts, aching for his touch. Wetness collected between her thighs as his mouth rocked her lips open.
Her world anchored around Ethan as his roughened hand tipped her chin just slightly so he could get better access to her. She swam in the mounting fire of his mouth caressing hers, teasing her, asking her to participate and join the scorching heat growing rapidly between them. Sarah trembled violently as his tongue moved slowly across her lower lip and then invited her to respond. It was almost as if he were teaching her how a man could pleasure his woman. Her arms tightened around his shoulders, her breath becoming ragged. Ethan pulled her tightly to him; there was no space left between their straining bodies. Sarah arched fully against him, wanting more, much more. As his fingers trailed down her cheek, framing her face so that he could take her deeper, the last vestiges of fear dissolved.
Her breasts tightened almost painfully, her nipples aching, captured against his chest. As Ethan moved his tongue into her mouth, she felt a stab of heat that sliced swiftly through her, vivid flames erupting between her thighs, making her so damp and needy, she moaned. Sarah almost cried out when Ethan tore his mouth from hers. His eyes were dark obsidian as he pulled away just enough to meet her gaze. She could feel the thunderous beat of his heart against hers; his nostrils flared, as if taking in her womanly scent. The look in his eyes made her start coming apart in his arms.
“Sarah,” Ethan rasped, framing her face with his hands. “I want to love you so damn badly I can’t think straight. But this is your decision, not mine.”
His words were guttural and heavy with desire. Sarah felt captured within the fire and need wrapping around them. She knew there were two suites in the villa. “But,” she whispered unsteadily, “won’t Emma and Khalid—”
“Sarah,” he growled. “They know we’re a couple. There is a suite available to us if we want it. Okay?” He held her startled gaze, which burned with need for him alone.
A couple? Sarah couldn’t think, her mind tumbling in tatters of fevered flames racing through her entire body from Ethan’s one kiss. He’d triggered every possible button within her as a woman.
“Yes…okay…”
He gave her a very male smile. It was the look of a man wanting his woman. Was she his woman? Sarah didn’t have the focus to feel her way through that life-changing question. All she knew was that she was trembling in Ethan’s arms, and the twinge in her body was something she had no experience with. Gazing up into his hooded expression, his eyes gleaming with intensity, Sarah surrendered herself in every way to Ethan. He must have seen it because in one easy motion, he picked her up, then carried her around the tiled sidewalk to the rear of the villa where there was a door.
For the first time in her life, Sarah closed her eyes and trusted a man with her heart, her body. She leaned her head against Ethan’s broad shoulder, a new sense of contentment flowing through her, her arms around his neck. She could feel Ethan breathing deeply, the span of his chest moving against her aching breasts.
As he opened the door and walked her down the dimly lit, carpeted hall, Sarah sank fully against him, no longer questioning Ethan or herself. Just once, Sarah wanted to know what it felt like to be truly loved by a man who wanted her for all the right reasons. She pressed a small kiss to his neck, inhaling his masculine scent, which only fed the ache, and her ugly past seemed to dissolve.
Tonight, Sarah was going to give herself to Ethan in every way that she knew how. Her heart told her that he would not only love her, but cherish her, as well. The sense of security around Ethan flowed through her, a sense of safety she’d never experienced before.
Chapter 10
Ethan laid Sarah gently on the large bed in the suite and sat down beside her, his hip resting against hers. The stained glass lamp on the antique dresser shed just enough light so he could read her shadowed expression. Her lips glistened. He wanted her so damn bad
ly.
Ethan reached out and brushed her lower lip with his thumb. “I want this to be good for you, Sarah,” he told her. “And you need to know, you’re in control here.”
Her eyes widened slightly. He wasn’t going to dredge up the past, or what he suspected had happened to her. He had to be careful since she might interpret any move as a threat. Never had he been more scared with a woman. Sarah was uncharted territory, and Ethan deferred to his heart and instincts to guide him.
When her pupils dilated as he whispered those words about control being in her hands, he felt an immediate shift in her energy. Relief perhaps? More importantly, he saw it in her gaze.
Ethan slid his finger across Sarah’s temple, moving strands of black hair away from her delicate ear. His heart lurched. Was it Sarah’s blue eyes, that otherworldly color, that swiftly captured his heart? Or the sadness he’d seen in them the first time he’d met her? Ethan didn’t know, but he wasn’t going to stop his heart from guiding him where she was concerned.
Sarah deserved a good man in her life. And that is what gave Ethan the steel control over his own body. He didn’t want her to associate him with men who had used her, either with her permission or not. Those men had selfishly taken her body, ignoring her heart and soul, not interested in giving back to Sarah or sharing anything with her. Ethan was damn well going to show her how a man could love his woman, make her his equal. And then they could soar together in one another’s arms.
It was the tenderness banked in Ethan’s gray eyes that convinced Sarah he meant what he said. No man had ever whispered those words to her. She felt suddenly vulnerable beneath his gaze, no longer defensive. He touched her heart. Ethan wanted to forge a trust with her she’d never experienced before, and it left her feeling inept. Just as she was going to say that, he leaned down. His mouth covered hers, sending fire scattering wildly throughout her body. She quivered while he threaded his fingers through her hair, the sensation bringing a moan of pleasure from deep within her.
In her fluctuating mind, Sarah felt a connection building. For whatever reason, as Ethan’s mouth gentled hers, coaxing her lips open, the feelings of weakness and shame melted away. His fingers massaged her scalp, sifting her silky strands between them, wreaking new havoc on her unraveling senses. She felt incredibly loved by this man who was a warrior and someone she never believed could ever exist in her world. He was erasing her fears so that no barriers remained between them. Physical and sexual hunger increased as his calloused fingers followed the curve of her slender neck.
Ethan lifted his mouth a bare inch from her own, searching her drowsy eyes, his breathing irregular. “Sarah, are you protected?”
Barely able to speak, she whispered, “Yes, I’m on the pill.”
“Tell me what you want, Sarah. What makes you feel good?” He saw arousal in her expression. Ethan could feel her quivering, her breath jagged, her eyes glazed with feeling her own body’s need for him. He’d kissed her; that was all. Ethan was shaken at how sensitive Sarah was, to his mouth, his hands. He saw the yearning in her eyes for more of his touches, but he had to hear what she wanted.
Her voice came out wispy. “I like what you’re doing…. I want you, Ethan. Please, don’t stop….” Sarah swallowed, feeling her pulse leaping as he considered her words and his hands stilled on either side of her head.
“Sarah, I don’t want to hurt you.”
She smiled softly, lifting her hand, resting it against his cheek. “Ethan, you will never hurt me. I know that.”
Her trembling voice tore through him. She’d given him her trust. “You can tell me stop at any time, Sarah, and I will. Just say the word.”
She nodded and closed her eyes, dragging in a breath as she felt his fingers gently pulling open the top of her flight suit. “I trust you,” she whispered. Trust. For whatever illogical reason, Sarah trusted Ethan with her soul. How to tell him that? She couldn’t, too wrapped up in the ache and need of her body. Ethan continued to open the one-piece flight suit. Her flesh grew taut, igniting wherever his knuckles brushed against her sensitized skin. And when he slid his arm beneath her shoulders, drawing her upward into a sitting position to pull down her flight suit, he took her mouth.
Her skin leaped with pleasure as Ethan undressed her, his mouth wreaking new havoc against hers. Lust spiraled through her. Ethan eased her down on the bed and took off her flight boots. Sarah pushed the legs of the flight suit off with his help. He dropped it on the floor, leaned over and gently pulled off her socks. He laid them aside and slowly stretched to his full height, his eyes never leaving hers.
Sarah quivered with anticipation as his burning look drifted from her legs to her belly and up across her breasts and, finally, back to her eyes. Her body responded to his dark, hungry expression. He settled at her hip, watching her, absorbing her. Ethan slipped his arm beneath her back, lifting her against him as he fumbled for and found the hooks to release her bra. His fingers trembled. So did she as Ethan exposed her breasts. Sarah did not cringe from his gaze; the expression of wonder on his face touched her as nothing else ever had.
“You are incredibly beautiful,” he whispered against her ear, lips touching her lobe, making her quiver. And then his mouth drifted to her cheek, then found her lips, curved against her, possessing her.
She felt her nipples grow hard. Needy. Her breath hitched, her heart crazily beating in her chest when his roughened hands moved with delicious slowness across her shoulders and then followed the curve around her breasts. His palms were calloused; her flesh was taut and growing hot beneath his exploration.
“Beautiful,” he said again, the moisture of his breath flowing across her skin. She tensed, arching forward, straining upward to meet his mouth hovering over the tight peak of her nipple. He moved his hand beneath her hip, adjusting her toward him, giving him full measure of her breast, and he began to gently suckle her.
A cry, part surprise, part intense pleasure, tore out of Sarah’s mouth. Her entire body spasmed beneath the electric shocks he’d created with his lips. Whimpering, her fingers sank deeply into his thick, tense shoulders. The sensations were so exquisite, so intense, she froze. He wreaked fire from her other nipple, his tongue rasping across it, making it tight and needy.
Her thighs became wet and her core tightened, wanting him. All of him. Sarah had never had love made so slowly, so deliciously, to her. Each of Ethan’s grazing caresses was reverent, as if she were a beautiful goddess come to earth to make love with him. And Sarah felt exactly like that, starving, trembling with his continued ministrations, drawing her breath into his mouth and exchanging it with his. She felt a desire so deep, so undefined in her world, that all she could do was cry out his name.
His mouth left her breast, and Sarah slowly opened her eyes, disoriented, tangled in the webs of lust as Ethan left the bed and stood before her. Her chest rose and fell; her thighs anticipated his coming touch. She couldn’t stand much more of this. He gave her a very male look as he shed his boots and pulled off his shirt, exposing the tan T-shirt and dog tags beneath it.
Sarah watched, mesmerized while he pulled off the T-shirt, exposing his darkly haired, powerfully sprung chest. She followed that line that moved across his slab-hard stomach and disappeared like a tease beneath the waistband of his trousers. She licked her lower lip, finding new pleasure in simply watching Ethan remove the clothes from his lean, athletic body.
As Ethan pushed the trousers downward, there was no mistaking how much he wanted her. Her heart quickened, her body erupting at the sight of his erection pressing against his boxer shorts. Her lashes lifted to his face, to his narrowed eyes that held her captive. She felt his hunger for her, but at the same time, she saw thoughtful regard deep in his gray eyes. It was tenderness. For her alone. The realization shook Sarah, opened her, increased her trust in Ethan.
Ethan removed his boxers and put them to the side. He could feel her eyes on him, feel her woman’s fire igniting in the drowsy depths of those incredible blue ey
es. He felt strong, his body in a painful knot of need. At the same time, Ethan had a primal need to protect Sarah. He placed his knee on the bed, the mattress dipping, and then he lay down beside her. He reached out, his hand curving over her hip, and slowly brought her fully against his body.
Her eyes flared with sensual realization as his erection pressed deeply into her belly. Ethan watched her carefully for fear, but all he saw was desire. Her lips parted, pleading silently for him to continue touching her. He wanted to whisper against Sarah’s mouth that he was falling in love with her. Ethan kept quiet, didn’t want to risk breaking the connection radiating between them.
He raised up on his elbow, leaned over and claimed Sarah’s mouth as he brought her to rest on her back, his hand splaying out across her soft, rounded belly, claiming her. Sarah reminded him of the lush, large-breasted, ample-hipped women painted during the Renaissance era. That bulky flight uniform hid her curves, but God, she was a voluptuous Garden of Eden beneath his exploring hand. Sarah was even more exquisite than even he had dreamed, her flesh creamy white against his sunburned hands.
Ethan slid his fingers down beneath the elastic of her silky white panties and felt her shift. Tense. He went no farther, just allowing her time to get used to his moving teasingly beneath the waistband, feeling her relax, trusting him once more. His mouth went from her lips to capture one of her hardened nipples. Sarah’s soft gasp, the arching of her back, told him she was in that pleasure zone once more. And it didn’t take much for him to coax down that silky material across her hips and then push them off her lower legs. He sat up enough to pull them off and let them drop to the floor.
Ethan caught Sarah’s dazed look as he ran his hand slowly up her long, shapely leg, feeling her muscles tense beneath the soft firmness of her flesh. He wanted her to get used to his hands, his calloused fingers that would only bring her pleasure. Skimming his hand around her thigh, he watched her eyes shutter closed, her breath hitching as his fingers slid closer to the juncture of her thighs. Sarah trembled, telling Ethan she’d enjoyed it.
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