“You are a sub, Q. A good girl.” He pulled her back to her feet, grabbed the camera from around her neck and put it on the couch. In a moment, she was stripped naked. Jude pointed at the floor and she dropped back to her knees. With a crook of his finger, he summoned Sabrina then pointed to indicate she should kneel beside Q. He walked behind them, and Q felt her wrists being tied to Sabrina’s. Her friend grabbed her hand and squeezed it then relaxed her grip but didn’t let go.
The camera’s flash startled her, but she didn’t look up. He took several more pictures, moving around them and murmuring his appreciation. With her eyes lowered, she got a close-up view of the way his hard cock pressed against the inside of his jeans.
Q groaned and leaned toward him, hoping he’d cooperate and fuck her mouth. Instead, his hand snaked down and he pinched her nipple deliciously hard. He switched the torture to the other one and kept increasing and decreasing pressure until she screamed into her closed mouth.
“Do you get to choose when to suck my cock?” he corrected, his words gentle but dangerous.
“No, Sir!” she panted.
“As long as you remember that, little brat.”
She bobbed her head in a nod. Beside her, Sabrina wriggled, rubbing her thighs together.
“Look at me,” he commanded. He knelt in front of them and ran a hand down each of their bellies, then between their legs. Thick fingers toyed with Q, and she moaned. Sabrina did too. He teased them simultaneously and their breathy cries filled the room. Both the sensations and Sabrina’s panting, made Q grit her teeth. Jude’s thumb gently circled her clit and soon she was lost to the feeling – the consuming need for release. He brought them both to the brink then stopped.
“No! Please Sir,” Q choked out.
Sabrina whined.
“Who decides when you can come?”
“You, Sir.” Q knew she sounded pitiful, but she didn’t care.
Jude untied them and led them to the couch, laying Q back first and spreading her legs. What was he up to? He made Sabrina straddle her. The silken glide of Sabrina’s thighs on hers… Mmm. She squirmed and Sabrina ground against her.
A stinging slap to her inner thigh stopped her. Another loud smack and Sabrina howled.
“No moving until I give you permission, naughty girls.”
The camera flashed again and Q did her best to stay still, feeling her muscles protest. She needed to move. Sabrina looked like she was going to explode. Q heard a zipper and caught a glimpse of muscled shoulder as Jude shed his clothes.
His hands gripped her thighs as he sank between her knees. Tongue swept deftly over her clit. With her breath unsteady, she opened her knees wider, a silent plea for him to take pity and finish her. After far too long, his teasing stopped and a moment later Sabrina was whining and writhing on top of her, the brush of her skin on Q’s electric.
Jude’s hard cock pushed roughly into Q and she gasped. Although she couldn’t see Jude thrusting into her, Q had a good view of him spreading Sabrina’s slit and catching her swollen clit between two fingers. He pressed Sabrina down toward her, making the girl’s breasts brush Q’s face.
So tempting – having those pretty pink nipples in reach. The scent of Sabrina intoxicated her. She caught one nipple with her mouth, and sucked, brushing her tongue over it in broad strokes. Moaning, Sabrina rubbed against her, and Q felt Jude’s hand pinned between them. His knuckles rubbed her pussy as he stroked at Sabrina’s clit.
The slow rhythm of his thrusts gradually and frustratingly wound the coil inside Q. Something pinched her clit hard. The unexpected pain made her buck beneath Sabrina. Her mouth opened in shock as the wave of pleasure swept her up and tumbled her, helpless. Sabrina shuddered above her shrieking out a series of high-pitched cries before a long groan from Jude drowned her out.
Everyone collapsed on top of her. Warm, protected, and maybe even loved. She smiled. When had she ever felt like this before?
Moments later, Jude leaned over Sabrina’s shoulder to brush his lips against hers. He nuzzled Sabrina’s ear, then pulled out and rose to his feet. A small whine escaped Q as half of her happy feeling went away.
With a sigh, Q shifted herself and Sabrina into a better position onto the couch. They lay on their sides, facing each other, trading little kisses and dragging their fingertips over each other’s skin. Sometimes Q’s body quivered with the aftershocks of her orgasm. She never wanted to let Sabrina go.
Just as she started to wonder where Jude had wandered off to, she heard the click of the camera. He’d been watching them. Sabrina ignored their photographer for awhile, and continued kissing her. Not sexy, lust-addled kisses. These were sweet – caring. Q’s throat tightened and she held back tears that pricked her eyes. Was it possible that Sabrina loved her? Really loved her? For the first time, she let herself hope.
Q was drifting off when Sabrina gave her a gentle shake.
“Don’t go to sleep, Q. I’m starving!”
She wriggled out from under Q’s arm and slid over her to get off the lounge. The softness of Sabrina’s skin against hers was heaven. She turned over to watch her friend’s lovely body while she moved around the room, collecting her strewn articles of clothing. Jude sat beside her, pulled her head into his lap, and petted her hair.
Once dressed, Sabrina collected Q’s clothing and threw them at her. “Really, I’m seriously starving. I haven’t eaten all day. I’m going to die of starvation and you’re both going to just sloth there and let it happen?”
“Slave driver,” Q muttered, but she rolled to her feet and began pulling her clothes on.
“That’s usually my job, but I’m too lazy today.” Jude smiled.
“Lazy Dom,” Q teased.
“I don’t deny it. Your shirt is inside out, by the way.” He stood, yanked it off over her head then redressed her properly. After grabbing the client loaner brush off a shelf, he insisted on brushing both girls’ hair, in turn. Q smiled as he did hers, gently unsnarling her hair with the brush and smoothing it with the palm of his hand. Bliss.
***
The day was sunny and warm without being too hot. A cool breeze swept in from the ocean from time to time, like the foreshadowing of autumn. Only a couple more weeks until September. The summer had blurred past so quickly that Q felt both like she’d missed it, and had intensely lived every moment of it.
They walked to a small restaurant down the street. Both girls linked an arm with Jude. Q wondered if other people saw what she could see – three people that knew each other too well to just be friends. When they went out to eat, she could predict what the others would order, they picked off of each other’s plates, and there were so many inside jokes it was like they had their own language. It made her feel important, valued, loved.
The place wasn’t busy, but they’d missed the noon rush by a couple of hours. They chose a table on the outdoor patio with a view of the ocean in the distance. Watching her two blond, tanned lovers as they ordered, she wondered what people thought of the three of them sitting together. Baywatch meets The Addams Family. Predictably, Jude ordered the special and Sabrina ordered seafood. Q didn’t care what the main dish was because the place had awesome fries.
As the server left to get their drinks, Sabrina leaned toward Q. “I feel like people can smell the sex coming off of us,” she whispered.
Q laughed, and when Jude raised a brow, she put her mouth to his ear and said, “Sabrina is worried we smell like fuck.”
Jude barked a laugh just as the waitress plunked his drink down in front of him and she eyed him appreciatively.
Nice! Q had been so wrapped up in her own thoughts she hadn’t seen their server. It wasn’t often she was oblivious to an attractive redhead. Jude hadn’t noticed her either. And he wasn’t just being polite to them by pretending not to. The girl moved off, looking disappointed she hadn’t caught his attention.
“Hey, Jude, if you collect her, you’ll have the whole set,” Q said.
Sabrina look
ed annoyed and muttered something under her breath about not liking to share.
He stared at her blankly then gave a lopsided grin. He’d missed the joke. They both laughed, and he shrugged and settled back, sipping at his beer.
Lunch came and they fell ravenously on their meals.
Jude groaned. “I feel like you two haven’t let me eat in days.”
“Yes, you’ve been too busy getting laid. You poor bastard.” Q arched a brow at him, daring him to complain. She’d lost momentum and already felt full. Sabrina was so hungry Q wasn’t sure she bothered to chew.
Jude’s dazzling blue eyes narrowed to sexy slits. His expression was damned smug. “I know, Q. If I had any buddies around here I wouldn’t get much sympathy. Maybe Fredrick would understand.”
“He won’t be very understanding if you don’t take those O-rings out of the sitting room ceiling soon,” Sabrina mumbled. Her eyes darted around to make sure no one else had heard her.
His expression changed to a pained smile. “Yeah. I’d better get on that. It’s hard to believe I’m leaving in a week. You two want to help me pack?”
The fries settled like a lump of lead in Q’s stomach. “A week? But there’s two more weeks until September.”
Compassion flashed in his eyes. Too close to sympathy for Q’s comfort. “I need time to settle in and visit my family before school starts, Q. I thought you knew that.” He paused, looking uncomfortable. “I’m sorry.”
They had never actually discussed when exactly he was going. And that, by itself, had seemed to mean maybe he wasn’t.
As if this were an everyday conversation, Sabrina poked at the remains of her meal. But as she placed the fork next to the knife, her hand shook and metal tinkled against metal. Her knuckles were white. Q felt like a rug had been jerked out from under her feet. Was this such a non-event that Jude could drop it into trivial conversation?
The silence stretched but no one seemed to want to break it. Jude looked from Sabrina to her and back. She’d always adored the hint of humor in his eyes and his mouth that turned into a grin at unexpected moments. It made him a man and not just her Dom. It wasn’t there now. His eyes seemed…dead.
“I wouldn’t have given this summer up for anything in the world,” he explained. “But it had to end. I have no choice. I never had.” He dropped the balled-up napkin from his hand and batted it into the middle of table.
He sighed and looked up at the sky. “I think I owe you an explanation.” Then he spoke very clearly though softly, enunciating words like they might explode if he handled them wrong. “I care for you both, a lot.”
Q swallowed.
“I didn’t mean to get emotionally involved, but it just kind of happened. Having two girlfriends was fun while I had the summer off but... You can’t leave your careers to follow me halfway across the country. And I can't let my family down and stay here. Though I’d love to keep this going longer, I can’t see it working out. We could try for long distance I guess.” He shrugged.
That suggestion was out of pity. He didn’t really want to try to make things work long-distance – he was just trying to soften the blow. And that made things worse.
“But it'll be hard for me to give you the attention you deserve. I'll be swamped. I remember my brother going through it. We barely heard from him for two years. Sabrina…” he looked at her, “you have something to lose here too. Do you think you could keep this up indefinitely?”
This time the silence seemed so solid the air might be glass. Q’s heart stopped.
Sabrina avoided eye contact, her lips turned down in a frown. “No.”
And so easily, the glass shattered.
“No. I can’t,” she added, frowning. “I’m sorry.”
“Hey.” He reached and patted her hand. “It’s okay. I thought so. This just makes it simpler, for all of us.”
Except me.
As if shaking herself from some heavy thought, Sabrina cleared her throat. “It’ll be weird to go back to just dating vanilla guys after this. Though, I guess it’s time to look for a real partner.”
“A real partner?” A ringing started in Q’s ears. She didn’t feel well. They were done with her. Simple as that.
“Yes.” Sabrina still didn’t look her in the eye. “It’s not that this wasn’t real but it couldn’t last, you know? We can still be just…friends. I mean, we have for five years, right? We can do that, can’t we? You promised.” Her final wistful tone might have given Q hope if this was the start of a relationship, but now it said precisely nothing to her numb heart.
“Sure.” She nodded. In her head she worked fast, trying to build the wall back up. But it was too late. There was nothing left to protect herself with. She stayed in her seat, trying to look as blasé as they did. They glanced at her intermittently, but she knew she couldn’t trust herself to speak. When the topic changed she excused herself, grabbed her bag, and escaped to the bathroom.
She bit her lip hard all the way there, trying not to cry before she was somewhere safe. With a gasp, she rushed into the room. It was empty. A flood of tears erupted, her hands unable to hold them back. Her heart fractured, grinding down into dust. She locked a stall door behind her. The sobs were too loud and she tried to quiet herself – she didn’t want to be the girl that made scenes in public restrooms.
It’s okay, it’s okay, she kept telling herself, frantic to calm down before Sabrina came looking for her.
Her default fix popped into her mind but she pushed it away. There had been therapy for this, when she was younger. After her parents died. Unbidden, the thought came back again. The knife in her bag was sharp. It would only take a couple of minutes. She could go somewhere quiet.
Shut up. She’d promised Sabrina they could still be friends no matter what. And Jude? Neither of them deserved the guilt she’d leave them with. This is what they’d agreed on. She could do this. Splashing water on her face helped a little, but she still looked red and blotchy. She’d tell them she’d had an allergic reaction and sneezed a lot. A little sob escaped her, and she bit the next one down. Her stomach knotted and she felt nauseous. Breathing slowly, she calmed.
She started to reframe. What had she learned from this? When she walked out of the restroom, the girl who cared too much would stay behind. The old Q would be back. Trying to be loving had been a mistake. First Nico, now this. Getting attached to people was for idiots – no more making a fool of herself. Her inner cyborg shut off the part of her that craved love. Violence, and how it made her feel, would have to be enough. She left the room awhile later, the last of her tender feelings ground beneath the soles of her boots.
Chapter 17
Jude
One of his lecturers had mentioned his father’s favorite saying today and it had hit home. The old medical saying that was supposed to help with diagnosis: If you hear hoofbeats, expect horses not zebras. He hadn’t been to see his dad yet.
Study and hospital rounds absorbed his time. Shit. Jude slammed shut the laptop and beat a short drum solo on the lid with his hands. The words in his head pattered in time with the beat.
An-atomy, an-atomy, path-ology and zebras. Fuck-ing zebras.
He slumped back in the chair and scrubbed his fingers through his hair. Fact was, he hadn’t done much at all for two months except try to settle into studies, and he was still a fish out of water…or was that a zebra?
And he still missed the girls – missed them so much his gut ached. Just yesterday, he’d come across a photo of the three of them Sabrina had emailed him a month ago.
Every night he shut his eyes and went to sleep remembering the feel of their hair in his hands. The feel of their bodies too, but mostly he pictured their hair gliding across his fingers. Sabrina’s tousled blonde. Q’s dead-of-night black. His beach bunny and his goth. The sexiest chicks ever and he was obsessed with their hair…and the way they talked. And what they’d said. How good they’d made him feel just by being there. Sometimes he wafted into dreamland, thinking
of them both lying with their heads on his chest, snuggling.
Snuggling for chrissakes. He was destined to study medicine, to be a doctor, not to be a playboy Dom with girlfriends left and right.
Fuck. He set both elbows on the desk and leaned his forehead on his palms. Fuck fantasies. Fuck swearing when there was no reason. Fuck everything.
He sat up and shoved back the chair then went in search of his jacket and a pair of pants suitable for visiting his father. Far as he knew, all that was clean was a blue T-shirt and a pair of faded brown pants. Maybe he should start just buying black, like Q. At the sudden ache, he froze, halfway to the closet, and put his hand to his chest. Heart attacks didn’t happen to men this young, did they? Not commonly. Think horses, not zebras. He squeezed his eyes shut.
Fuck horses too.
As soon as he pulled into the parking lot at the nursing home, he felt queasy. He hated visiting this place. In fact, he hated all places with the sick. The accumulation of illness and sadness overwhelmed him every time. Blood, he could handle. Puke, wet diapers, kids vomiting on him…all those were okay. Just not this. Not places where death poked its scythe in way too often.
He stared at his hands on the steering wheel. Some doctor he’d be. The smell of fresh-cut timber excited him, and the firm feel of a hammer in his hand. Making things. Building. That was him. Sick people made him sick.
The nurses smiled as he went past. The entertainment room was packed with elderly men and women in wheelchairs watching TV, playing cards and gossiping. IV drip stands stood like strange metal trees. His march down the corridor was as lonely as that of a soldier coming home from war without his buddies. His soles squeaked on the floor. He took the right turn to the door, and pushed it open.
The room itself was clean and smelled fresh. A vase of beautiful roses sat on the table – his mother must have been here recently. She still came most weeks. The view out the opened French door was stunning – trees, an expanse of green lawn, flower beds overflowing with bright blossoms. A few birds flitted past, chirping.
The Dom with a Safeword (Badass Brats #1) Page 24
