by Amy Brent
I got some emails out about making future trips to look at houses and clicked on Facebook to take one of my peeks at it. I barely had a profile there and had gone very private after the break up, but I did keep up with a few friends. I looked at all Viv’s pictures and made some comments before I moved on to other Carlsbad friends that I didn’t lose in the break up or move. It was amazing how many people supported the one that did everything wrong sometimes, but that didn’t matter to me anymore. I was here now and working on a better life.
I tried to watch a movie when I was done working but I couldn’t focus on it. I sent Viv a text and asked her if she could talk, smiling lightly when she called me right away. I told her about the day with Lance and even she knocked him down a peg from her praise the last time we spoke. Viv quizzed me on everything to see what happened and I told her the details. Viv was the one person that I could be honest with and we picked apart the date together.
Viv agreed that she could find nothing strange to cause his reaction, at least nothing that I did. I acknowledged that I didn’t know him well to begin with, so anything could be going on with Lance and he just didn’t want to talk about it. Some guys used sex to deal with things and perhaps that was Lance. She wasn’t sure about my firm denial about seeing him again but accepted that it was my choice. She felt particularly bad about everything in Carlsbad since she didn’t know what was going on. Had Viv known about the cheating, she would have told me, but everyone kept it hidden from both of us.
“I miss you. Maybe I should come and visit next weekend,” Viv suggested as I smiled with tears in my eyes. I missed her more than anything and needed to see her.
“I’d love that. I might have some clients but that doesn’t take long all the time. I’d have some time with you.” I told her as she told me that she’d make some arrangements. I hung up feeling a lot better and locked up to go read in bed. Viv always made everything better and it was the hardest thing in the world to move away from her and my mom. I propped up some pillows and finished my tea as I read something on my Kindle, trying not to think about Lance.
There were more guys out there. This was LA and there were so many people that I still had to meet to form my tribe here. There was a whole life to build, but it already felt empty without Lance in it.
CHAPTER 15
Lance
I stared at the phone, taken by surprise by Leila’s message. She just dumped me over a text. I knew that it was shitty what I did to her today, but she caught me off guard and left too fast for me to recover. I normally didn’t mind when women left after sex but the whole world was different with Leila.
I set my phone on the counter, choosing to accept it for now. I walked away from women all the time, so this should be a relief for me. It shouldn’t mean anything.
I headed to the studio in an hour and felt a bit lost during the drive. I had a great life and thanks to meeting Leila, I had an amazing house to live in. I met her for a reason and maybe that was it. The fling was great, beyond it to be honest but it might have just been a fling. I could live with that. I had a lot of them on my record and some women hated me.
It bothered me that Leila might hate me now.
I parked in the lot and strolled into the studio, trying to think about my scene with two new actresses. It was another party/orgy scene and something I was very familiar with and I knew that it would be easy. I wasn’t feeling all that turned on by the idea of a threesome, but work hadn’t turned me on just in itself in some time. I was blessed with a quick response to a naked woman and it worked out well for me.
I dressed in the shorts that were my outfit for the quick scene and ran a hand through my hair. I played back the sex in the kitchen and slipped my hand over my shorts, gripping my cock as it hardened. Atta boy. I just needed to get through this before I found a way to get Leila back in my life. She felt too fucking good to not be a part of it.
I started the scene by walking down a mock hallway to see the women making out on the bed. I pretended to be surprised and watched them with what I hoped was a hungry smile on my face, leaning in as a moan filled the room. They were into it and they grabbed at one another as I stepped into the room and cleared my throat.
“Do you ladies need any help?” I asked then in a husky voice, faking every tone. The blonde pulled away from the brunette to stare at me with a hungry gaze before she lunged forward to tug at my shorts. She ripped them down and gripped my cock as I groaned at the firm grasp around me. New actresses were so eager.
They moved so the blonde was on her knees with me in her mouth and the other woman behind her, eating out her pussy with great enthusiasm. I gripped the hair of the blonde, closing my eyes, and feeling myself harden as I felt her wrap tightly around me. I opened them, looking at the sight of the two women together as I reminded myself that I’d been living this life quite happily for the last few years. I got sex here on the job and I could get any woman I wanted outside of the industry. I was living a dream according to most men.
The scene changed as the blonde moved away from me and rolled onto her back to allow the other woman full access to her body. I removed her barely there shirt and tossed it to the side before cupping her fake tits in my hand. I missed Leila’s real ones in my hands and I played with her nipples automatically as I stayed there for a moment. I knew that I needed to be a bigger part of this scene even though what was happening was a fan favorite and I gave them a minute, so the blonde could come. I let go of her as she screamed and moved around to tug the brunette up and onto her back, fingering both hard as I looked down at them.
I took turns making them come before I turned one of them onto her knees, slipping a condom on before I took her hard. It was the brunette and she grunted as I bottomed out inside of her, giving her all my length without taking it slow.
I fucked her hard and fast as the blonde watched, playing with her clit. She looked like she wanted it next and I licked my lips as I smacked the ass in front of me hard as she cried out. The woman was still tight, and I knew that it would change over time, so I closed my eyes and told myself to enjoy it. I finished with the brunette and then positioned myself in front of the blonde and brought her legs to my shoulder before I slid inside of her. I gave in to the feeling of a woman wrapped around me and running with it. This was nature and it was supposed to feel good.
We finished the scene with the brunette riding my cock again and the blonde sitting on my face as I ate at her soaking pussy. She was completely turned on by this and I found her clit as the other woman rode me hard and rough. They both came within seconds of one another and the director called out that we were done as they both dropped to the side of me and took deep breaths. Someone brought us all bottles of water and I went to clean up to the side of the set before I opened it to take a sip.
I left to get my clothes on and considered my next move. I was done filming for the day and I could do something to wow Leila, making her consider still seeing me. I couldn’t stand the idea of not sleeping with her after the way that she felt.
I called out a goodbye to the director and headed to my car, backing out of the lot, and heading home. I showered there and changed into some sweats as I made plans for the following night. I was going to woo her and make her want to take back her words because we were good together. Even if it was just sex, we were great together. I ended up talking to my best friend and he told me that I’d never keep a good woman with my job, but I refused to agree with him. I was going to hide that if I could, and I argued that she wouldn’t find out.
“You’re fucking famous. You don’t think that she’ll find out somehow?” Brian asked me, disbelief in her voice.
“She’s not part of that life, Brian.” I thought about Terra and hoped that she wouldn’t blow my cover as I pushed the thought away.
“She met you, didn’t she?” He reminded me as I dropped to the couch. “It’s great that you’re making money and have a great life, but it won’t last if you find something serious with
a woman. You have your beach house and the car. Find something else to do. Be a freelancer like you tell everyone about that you hide the real job from. You’d be great at that.”
“Someday. I’m still all in,” I assured him as he laughed on the other end. “I don’t even know if she’ll take me back to begin with. I am going to do flowers and take out and see how far I get.”
“You need to settle down sooner or later, Lance.” He was serious about his girlfriend and on the verge or proposing, giving me a reason to get Leila back. She’d be a great wedding date.
“Yeah, yeah, yeah.” I teased him as we moved onto another subject. Brian knew when I was done with a subject and gave in to my need to not talk about any kind of relationship. We were two different kinds of guys.
I got up in time for a long work out and dressed for work. I was shooting multiple scenes today and kept my thoughts about Leila positive and my fantasies about past times with her front and center. I was working with various actors today on a bigger movie and Terra was one of them. She came onto the set later, more towards the end and I saw her on the phone as I fucked a petite blonde, laughing at something as she looked on. I saw the director wave at me and moaned loudly as I faked a hard orgasm. Terra raised a perfect brow and ended the call as the actors that were finished left the set and the other ones took their places.
This scene was particularly provocative and involved some light bondage. Terra got off on that, on the set or in her own bedroom and I had a hard time with it as I wondered what she told Leila about her job. Did she tell her who she worked with or honor our privacy? I slapped her ass hard as she jerked forward with a cry, sliding off my cock. I intended on keeping her nails away from my skin this time since I was just now healing from the last incident. I tugged her hair, lifting her body up as she moaned my name.
“Don’t you ever mark my body again,” I warned her softly as she arched her back against me. I fucked her harder, finding my erection softening at the idea of being with Terra. I wanted Leila and she was the one thing that could get in my way at this moment. I was harder on her than I probably needed to be, but the director seemed to love it and Terra came hard for me, despite my lack of an erection towards the end.
I pulled away from her and rolled towards the end of the bed, pulling the condom off and tying the end. I didn’t trust Terra and I pushed myself up, walking to the trash and dropping it in before I went to change.
I considered putting off my plans until tomorrow since I fucked so much today. I was soft as hell now and I closed my eyes as I splashed cold water on my face. I headed out without saying goodbye to anybody, hearing Terra calling my name as I let the door close. I walked quickly to my Jeep and pulled out of the lot, needing the hottest shower that I could stand. I needed to cleanse my skin and my soul today before I tried to make things right with Leila.
I took a long shower before dressing in some black pants and a deep green shirt. I pulled on some black boots and headed to my favorite florist to get a colorful bouquet before heading to a Thai place for some take out. I hoped that she’d be home and eager to listen to me as I headed to her complex, parking away from her door so I could surprise her. I smoothed my shirt before I grabbed the food and flowers after pocketing my keys. I walked slowly to her door, seeing some lights on inside as I tapped gently.
My heart was pounding as I waited for her to open the door, knowing that I wanted her to be willing to let me in. I didn’t care if we slept together tonight or not. I just wanted her in my life.
The door opened slowly, and Leila peered out, a frown on her face.
“What are you doing here?” She demanded as I stared at her in surprise. Was she still that upset at me? “You lied to me, Lance. You lied about everything.”
“What are you talking about?” I asked in confusion as her face fell into a painful expression.
“I heard you today.”
CHAPTER 16
Leila
I heard the moan in the background after Lynn told me the she’d narrowed down her decision to two choices. I recognized the voice immediately and covered my mouth with my hand.
Lance sounded like that every time we were together. I asked her if she was at work and Lynn laughed as she confirmed that she was. She told me that she’d call me later and I dropped the phone to the couch as I felt tears in my eyes.
Lance wasn’t a trust fund baby. He worked in the porn industry just like Lynn and I dropped to the couch as I rested my head in my hands. I started to cry as I imagined how many women that he’d been with. How could I even mean anything to him when he had sex on a regular basis like that? I felt stupid as shame washed over me and I leaned back into the cushions of my couch.
I stayed there for hours, letting the shock wash over me as I regained my composure. I still needed to complete a sale with Lynn and refused to let her know about my involvement with Lance. I was going to act professional with her and collect my commission, ending all contact after that. I couldn’t stand the thought of Lance being with the beautiful woman, work or not. I wondered how many times he took it off set with the actresses or any other woman.
I knew that I was just a notch on his proverbial bedpost and I turned to my back. It was the best sex that I’d ever experienced but probably routine for him. I thought about all the things that he said to me and wanted something to be true. I wanted to stand out somehow, but I was just a naive girl in his eyes that had little sexual history. I couldn’t be what he needed.
I forced myself to eat later and sipped some tea to calm my stomach. I went to my room in the clothes that I was wearing all day with my cup and Kindle, trying to distract myself from what happened as I curled up under my covers.
Carlsbad sounded great right now. I left home because of heartbreak and a part of me wanted to go running right back just to feel safe. I regretted getting as involved as I had with Lance and I sighed as I stared at the ceiling.
I was done with men. I was done with dating and especially sex. Done.
I closed my eyes and heard a knock to my door, jumping up in surprise. I knew that few people would be here at all and I licked my lips. I told myself to ignore it since there was a good chance that it could be Lance. He might not know that I heard him earlier at all. I heard the knock again and anger rose in me as I sat up and dropped my feet to the floor. I was going to give him a piece of my mind and I glanced down slowly at my jeans and wrinkled t-shirt. I didn’t care how I looked.
I opened the door slowly after checking the peephole to make sure that it was Lance. He was holding a huge bouquet of flowers and a bag of food with an enticing smile on his face as I stared at him. Lance looked like everything was fine and I opened my mouth to speak.
“What are you doing here?” I asked him in a hoarse voice as he looked at me in surprise. “You lied to me, Lance. You lied about everything.” I could feel my pain rising in my voice as confusion crossed his face.
“What are you talking about?” He looked perplexed as he searched my face for answers and I swallowed the lump in my throat.
“I heard you today.” The words hurt as they came out since I was acknowledging the truth.
“Heard me what?” Lance asked as something crossed his face that looked like fear.
“You are a goddamn porn star. I heard you when I was talking to Lynn. You work with her?” I asked as he glanced around quickly. Lance pushed his way inside as I started to scream for him to leave.
“Shut up,” Lance hissed as he dropped the stuff in his arms to the floor.
“How could you lie to me?” I asked as I struggled against his firm body.
“Because you matter. I didn’t want to lose you over my job, and Leila? It is just a job,” Lance assured me as I widened my eyes at him.
“Just a job?” I pushed him away, but he stayed pressed against me as he stared into my eyes. “You sleep with women at work. I can’t even imagine how many there has been, Lance. Is that even your real name?”
“I change
d my last name for the movies. I gave you my real name and I have been otherwise genuine with you, Leila. You’ve meant more to me than any other woman in my life.” His eyes begged me to believe him as I felt tears sliding down my cheeks.
“If that’s true, how could you lie? You’ve been with Lynn…for work? How about in your private life?” I asked as insecurity flooded my veins. He closed his eyes and sighed, making me let out a gasp.
“We work together. I have slept with her a couple times after work, but I don’t feel anything for her. I never have. I’ve never wanted a woman more than a few times before you. I tried to stay away but I need you, Leila.” He pressed his mouth close to mine as I shook my head. I couldn’t kiss him. “I need you.” Lance claimed my mouth in a desperate kiss as I stilled below him, fighting my desire. I hated him for his lies and the other women, but my body still responded to him. I felt him press me to the wall as his tongue danced against my lips, hating the idea of him doing this to other women today. How could he still get to me?
I moaned and slid my hands up the front of his shirt as I parted my lips, feeling his tongue against mine. I was weak, and I admitted it to myself as he reached down to life me against his body.
“I need you,” he murmured before he kissed me again, tasting my mouth as I wrapped my arms around his neck. Lance carried me to my room, leaving the bag and flowers on the floor as he headed to my bed. I didn’t want this to happen, but I couldn’t find the strength to tell him no. Lance dropped me down to the mattress and pressed his body over mine, hard against the seam of my leggings. I couldn’t help but to moan as he rocked against me, making my very core tingle with need.
