Colin's heart stuttered at her declaration, then resumed it's pounding in a triumphant rhythm. She had chosen him. But he had to know, he needed to be sure before he proceeded with his plan.
"Ah, love. You don't know what your words do to me," he whispered into her hair as he pulled her into a deeper embrace. The fear of her next answer forced him to close his eyes as he spoke.
"What of the other lad? Soon I'll be simply a memory. A fond one, I hope. Surely he will be waiting to mend your heart? After all, isn't he the one who is fighting for your hand? Perhaps…" he paused, and forced the words from his mouth before he reconsidered his actions. "Are you sending me away so that you may be free to have him instead?" He knew the words could be wounding, but he needed the truth. Whom did she love?
"Colin will not be marrying me," she spoke in a whisper of defeat.
"Oh, and why not lass? It seems as if he cares for you." He almost choked on the words. How he wanted her to love him for his true self, not the imposter.
"Aye he does, tis true. But…" She gazed up. Her green gaze bore into his as she spoke in a determined tone that rang with courage. "But he will not be marrying me. My father…."she stuttered, "My father has already chosen for me." The moment the words were out of her mouth, she closed her eyes and sagged her head upon his chest and sobbed. "I must confess tae ye. He had offered me a measure of freedom, in choosing my husband should I discover the traitor myself." She whispered the last words. As her gaze lifted, he read shame and guilt in her eyes. After a moment, she glanced down again.
"Then why did you not turn me in? Were you not searching?" he trailed off as she looked up at him with shimmering eyes and explained.
"But I was a fool tae believe I could. And after meetin' ye, and finding my heart so…"
"Involved?" Colin helped gently.
"Aye. I couldn't do it."
"So in keeping my secret, you sacrificed your own hope."
She shrugged her shoulders and wouldn't meet his gaze.
"Not exactly. Tonight my father told me the truth. There was never any hope of me gaining that freedom. He had already chosen Rian tae succeed him. I was to be additional… bait." Her face twisted into a disgusted grimace. She took a deep breath, and wiped her cheeks with the sleeve of her plaid.
Colin could only focus on breathing calmly lest he scare Arywnn with the fierceness of his anger. How could her father promise her to Rian? The lowest bastard… his thoughts trailed off into dangerous territory. The only calming force on his body was the small hand of Arywnn pressing into the hard muscle of his back while he held her soft form.
"Why would you do this? Warn me when you have such a burden to bear?" Colin asked in a husky tone, not caring that his tone betrayed the depth of his emotion. He was still careful to speak in his English tones, rather than the brogue of Colin the blacksmith.
"Because I'd rather one of us be free than none at all," she answered without hesitation, speaking volumes with her simple answer.
"Why choose me over yourself?" he asked. The moon continued to cast muted shadows, and he drank in the sight of her as if a man starved.
"I always knew ye were daft." She chuckled, surprising Colin. "Weren't ye the one that said love gives rather than takes?" She spoke in a clear English accent mimicking his words.
"Yes, I believe I did." He chuckled and raised a callused hand to brush a stray hair behind her delicate ear.
"You were right, that is what love does. This." She raised her hand, and ran her fingers over his covered face. "This is what love does. It puts the lover above all else, including itself." The words were whispered across his lips as she rose up on tiptoes and kissed him with a gentle caress of her lips.
"Yes," he whispered against her soft lips. "But you're forgetting one thing." He placed another lingering soft kiss to her lips, and then pulled back.
"And what is that?" Her words were whispered in a husky tone that shot heat through Colin.
"Why would I let you sacrifice yourself? Would that be love?" He let his eyes roam over her shadowed features.
"Tis no other way. Even now we don't have much time…." The words cracked as she spoke them, as if her fear and pain were breaking through her courageous determination.
"There is another way, there is only one way…" He leaned down, and placed a fierce kiss across her lips. The seal of their lips broken, he reached for her hand and pulled her as he began to run. She struggled to keep up with his pace, but soon they were into the clearing where Garten waited beside another horse he had purchased earlier.
"Garten? How did you…?" she turned toward him, but there wasn't time to waste.
"All that matters is that I did…" He lifted her up onto the saddle, and mounted his own horse. The moon offered enough light for him to see the path. Quietly, he led Arywnn deep into the forest toward Aberdeen. He continued to glance back, assuring his pounding heart that she was truly with him. Silence was their companion as they rode deeper into the thick threes. Each moment that came and went left Colin with a tense fear. For with each moment that slipped past, it brought him closer to sunrise, and sunrise would test her courage further. The truth would be revealed.
Chapter Twelve
Arywnn couldn't believe what she was doing. One moment she had resigned herself to the hideous future that awaited her. The next she was mounting up on Garten, and riding off into the dark forest behind Knight. She bit her lip with uncertainty as she wove around thick trees, careful to stay close to Knight. Did she want to go back? No. There was nothing left for her, not after her mother's death. All that was once home now only reminded her of hurt, betrayal, and fear.
As the horses passed through the tall brush it whispered against their legs. Excitement bubbled within Arywnn. As she glanced east she saw the faintest glimmer of dawn, and her body shook with a sudden realization. Soon she would see his face. Surely the light would reveal his deepest secret. The secret he kept to protect her. She understood his reasons, but how often had she imagined his face, his form? Always in her dreams he gazed at her with blue-black eyes and dark hair, but her heart pinched as she saw the face in her mind. Colin.
As Garten followed Knight, her mind wandered. What of Colin? Would he send up an alarm that she was missing, or simply assume she fell asleep and didn't wake for their secret rendezvous? Would his heart be broken when he discovered her missing? Arywnn sighed. What's done is done. She had made her choice, and even now with the unknown ahead of her, she wasn't afraid. Knight had always championed her. In the process of earning her trust, he had also won her heart. She would be safe with him. She had to be.
"Hungry, love?" Knight asked. A smile crept across her face as her heart skipped a beat at the beloved sound of his crisp English accent. Who would have thought she would find his speech so enticing? An Englishman no less!
"Aye, it seems that I am. Not tae worry though, I'll make do."
Reaching out and patting Garten's neck, she pulled him to a halt behind Knight's mount. He nickered softly and began to munch on the wet grass.
"There's no need for you to wait, love. I am always prepared." He had a joyful tone to his words as he went to his bag and retrieved two bannocks and some soft cheese.
"Ye are prepared. So my kidnappin' was a forethought, was it?" Arywnn teased as she bit into the oatcake. Her mouth watered as she chewed.
"I must admit that it indeed was. I was hoping to ask you in a more romantic way…" He trailed off.
Arywnn giggled. That was so much like him. Hadn't he hidden flowers in Garten's mane? Hadn't he written her a silly poem to cheer her from the death of her mother? A smile bent Arywnn's lips as she took a bite of the soft goat cheese.
"But I'll take what I can get. All that matters is that you are here with me, love."
His tone was sincere. Her toes curled in her boots as she melted into his voice calling her 'love'.
The trees began to appear grey in the stretches of dawn, and Arywnn's heart pounded. It wasn't light enough
, yet. But soon it would be. Soon she would see his face and know it.
"We must begin moving, love. Are you ready?" The gentle tones Knight used were always like honey melting on hot bannocks to Arywnn's ears.
"Aye, I am."
She went around to mount Garten, but stopped when Knight lifted her up unexpectedly into his arms and kissed her firmly on the mouth. His scarf was lifted high enough so that his short beard was rough on her skin, but she didn't mind at all. He tasted like warm bannock and spice as he teased her senses. His arms were under her legs and around her back as he pressed her close into his chest. He smelled of horse and morning dew, and Arywnn tried to remember each sensation of her first kiss of freedom. She reached up and under his scarf, diving her fingers into his hair. The feel of its thickness caused a sigh to escape when Knight broke their kiss.
"I'm indeed tempted to remain here and kiss you senseless, but we must go," he growled, as if angry with the necessity of their journey. Arywnn giggled as he lifted her onto Garten's back, and then strode with purposeful steps to his own mount. The path was now illuminated in a pale glow of sunlight as they made their way. Had he waited a few more moments in kissing her, she would have been able to see his face, even through the shrouding veil. With a disappointed sigh, she kicked Garten's sides as she pulled the reigns up forcing the animal to leave the lush grass behind and continue on their journey. For now the darkness held his secret, but soon the light would reveal it.
****
Time was running out. Only a few more moments wrapped up in sweet bliss, and she would have seen his face. Even the deep pleasure of losing himself in her soft kiss was overwhelmed by the fear that clenched his heart at the impending revelation. Now the sun was beginning to rise, if he were to turn around she would see enough of his face to create suspicion. Only the lingering shadows held his secret. As much as he dreaded the revelation and the duplicity that would be known, his heart also craved the freedom it would bring. The desire to stop and tell her the truth warred against the knowledge that they needed as much distance as possible from the Chattan clan. He prayed they wouldn't meet up with anyone, or he wouldn't carelessly glance back before he had a chance to explain himself.
The light was full a scant hour later. He pressed on as long as he dared before searching for a place to rest. It was time to reveal the truth. Careful to turn his head the opposite direction, he turned his horse off the path and into the brush. He would lead her deeper into the trees before he spoke. The sound of Garten's hoof falls alerted him that she was indeed following him without question. She had been silent the whole journey, save the stolen moments by the loch before the light. The moment was close, and he hoped that she would understand, that she would love him in spite of his duplicity.
At last they were far enough from the path that he felt safe in stopping. Without turning around he spoke.
"Love? Why don't we wait here for a moment?"
"Alright," came her hesitant reply. Surely she knew that now he would no longer be able to keep his secret. Even with the scarf shrouding his face, she would know his chest, his body in the sunlight. While he was sure she had some suspicions from seeing his back, the hood he wore over his hair and the thick coat he had donned for the purpose of disguise surely helped keep his identity intact till he was ready; till he was sure she was ready.
The sound of her boots crushing dry grass alerted him of her dismount. With a deep breath, he dismounted as well, though he was careful not to turn around, not yet.
"Love, now that the moment is here for you to know me, I find I'm sorely tempted to once again hide. Do you think me a coward?" he asked in a hushed tone, holding his breath for her answer.
"If ye were proud of your necessary deception, then I'd be concerned," she responded, surprising him with her insight.
"Well spoken. But I what if I'm not who you want me to be? What if you are hoping I am another?" He felt his heart pounding wildly.
"I chose ye. If I had my heart set on another, why would I do what I've done?"
"You are wise love. Forgive my heart for doubting." He exhaled a nervous breath.
"Tis forgiven."
"This may sound strange, but will you close your eyes while I turn? I want to see you in the daylight, see you as myself rather than who I was to be."
An impatient sigh reached his ears as she called out that she would indeed close her eyes.
He couldn't help but smile to himself at her impatient nature. The moment at hand, he found himself turning slowly. She stood a few lengths from him, hands folded in front of her, with a small smile playing across her lips. Her eyes twitched as if wanting to open, but she held them closed. The need to touch her overwhelmed him, and he walked closer to her.
"Keep them closed love," he whispered while reaching up and tracing her soft skin with his fingers, and then tracing her lips. She let out a soft sigh, and her body relaxed it's ridged posture as he brushed his hands through her hair, and once again traced her face. Fear of rejection nearly paralyzed him before he could utter the words, but he spoke them. The air left his lungs as he waited, hopelessly breathless.
****
Arywnn held her breath as Knight's fingers traced her face with loving care, sending shivers and tingles throughout her body. The temptation to open her eyes was almost beyond her control. Here he was in the light caressing her face, and she was honor bound to wait. Each moment was both full of pleasure as he administered loving attention to her skin, but at the same time akin to torture as she waited for him to be ready to reveal his identity. She felt his tension in the way he breathed, the way he didn't shift from foot to foot, but held perfectly still as he stood only an arm's length away. His fear was genuine and, not for the first time, Arywnn wondered why.
"Open your eyes love, and see the truth."
Now that the moment was here she almost wanted to prolong it, live in the sweet anticipation for a blessed second longer, but her impatient side overruled her more fanciful notions. She opened her eyes quickly, and met a familiar blue-black gaze.
At first she wondered if she were dreaming. It couldn't be. She searched his eyes before allowing herself to gaze at his face, his nose, and his lips. The need to step back to see the rest of his body caused her to back away slightly, but she saw panic and fear echo in his eyes. She froze her movements.
He truly was afraid she would reject him!
The thought flitted through her mind for only a moment before she began piecing parts of the puzzle together. How had she not seen it before? He arrived around four years ago, but his Scottish brogue was perfect. No one had questioned him. As a blacksmith, he heard all the news from both clansmen and those passing through. It's how he knew to get Garten. It's how he was able to save her that one fateful night that began the whole misadventure. The constant questions and answers her mind kept twisting made her feel dizzy. A moment of closing her eyes proved to help alleviate the confusion, but she still had one question.
"Ye were the one that…" words failed her. "I mean, how did ye expect…!" she tried again. "Ye couldn't very well turn yerself in, now could ye Colin? What were ye thinkin' agreein' tae help me!" She shook her head and closed her eyes for a moment before opening them to spear him with a withering glare. "Ye really are daft!" She shook her head trying to collect her jumbled thoughts.
"Ye aren't upset with me then lass?" he lapsed into his brogue.
"Don't."
Confusion and pain flickered in his eyes.
"Tis not who ye are," Arywnn added as she reached up to trace the bearded shadow of his jaw with her fingers. He closed his eyes at her slight touch and leaned into her hand.
"No more deception. Speak true," she whispered as she pulled the hood off his head and revealed his raven hair.
"Are you angry with me?" he whispered in his native crisp accent.
"No," she whispered, gazing into his eyes.
"Surprised?"
At this she laughed.
"Aye, but truth b
e told, each time I tried tae imagine what my Knight looked like, I'd picture ye."
"Truly?" His face broke into a shocked smile that lit up his face.
"Aye, truly."
The grin on her face was beginning to hurt her cheeks, but the question of why still burned in her mind.
"Ye never answered me Colin. Why? Ye knew ye couldn't very well help me when I asked! Why did ye agree? 'Twas foolish."
"Ah love, that question is one I'm afraid you'll perhaps not understand, or forgive easily." His eyes lost the merry twinkle shining only a moment earlier. They looked like solid stones as he took a fortifying breath, and raised his hand to rub his jaw. Arywnn noticed just how large his hands were. The calluses were dark from soot gleaned from the forge. His hands were always so gentle in contrast to the strength they implied; the strength she knew they possessed.
"You know I watched you," he spoke in a low whisper as he studied the toe of his boot.
"Aye. I still dinnae' ken why."
A chuckled escaped his lips before he regarded her gaze.
"Because I was powerless not to. From the first week I arrived to Clan Chattan, I saw you skipping merrily along and lost my heart to you."
"But I didn't speak with ye till a good two years back! Ye arrived more than four ago."
"True, but that doesn't mean I didn't wish it were otherwise."
His admission brought a rush of blood to her face in pleasure.
"I knew it would not be wise to get attached to anyone, not with my… profession." He paused and his eyes watched hers, as if searching for a reaction before he continued. "I kept myself from speaking with you for two years, but those two years were spent watching your movements from the forge and among other places." He chuckled softly.
Knight of the Highlander Page 9
