The solicitor had told her that she would be ‘ill-advised’ to try to hold on to the house. The debt was too great. She had to face facts and start to consider her options. But it all felt too hard at the moment. She had put in her notice at the MRA and she was working diligently to keep her Wife for Hire clients happy. Why couldn’t she have the luxury of concentrating on one thing at a time?
But that was never going to happen. After all, she was a woman. God had decided to make women the ones who had to think of everything, keep everyone else happy and put themselves last.
Well screw that.
If Jeff thought that Jessica should have a phone, then he could pay for the damn thing and he could put it in his name so the bills would be sent directly to him as well. Sam was going to have nothing to do with it.
‘That’s fine with me,’ Jeff replied curtly when she gave him her conditions later, over the phone.
She had been prepared to argue with him, but he was agreeing to everything she said, if a little gruffly. ‘Well, just so it’s on the record, I don’t approve of Jessica having a phone at her age,’ Sam added.
‘Apparently lots of her friends have them,’ Jeff countered. So, he was the sucker parent. ‘And just because you don’t approve, Sam, doesn’t mean it isn’t right.’
She was stunned into silence.
‘You’d better get used to the fact that I’m going to have a lot more input from now on.’
‘So, for sixteen years you leave all the decisions to me and now you’re going to tell me how to run things?’
‘No,’ he said firmly. ‘I’m not trying to take anything away from you, Sam. I just want to be more involved. For sixteen years I worked such long hours, I hardly got to see the kids, let alone know what was going on in their lives.’
‘No one was forcing you,’ Sam retorted. ‘Don’t blame that on me.’
Jeff sighed audibly. ‘Can we get away from this blame thing?’ he pleaded. ‘I’m just saying, I got onto this treadmill and I never questioned whether it was where I wanted to be. I just kept going. I think I was walking in my sleep for the last ten years. And now I’ve woken up.’
Sam swallowed hard, trying to keep down the lump that was rising in her throat. She heard beeps on the line.
‘I have a call waiting,’ she croaked.
‘Okay then,’ Jeff said. ‘Bye.’
Sam hung up and took the next call. ‘Hello?’
‘Hi, it’s me,’ Max chirped.
Sam started to sob, she couldn’t stop herself.
‘Sam! What’s the matter? What happened?’
‘I was just talking to Jeff,’ she sniffed.
‘Oh, what’s the dickhead done now?’
‘Nothing,’ she sighed. ‘It’s just, you know, he’s transforming into this totally concerned father all of a sudden. Having an opinion about everything.’
‘Tell him where he can shove his opinions.’
‘No, it’s good that he’s becoming more involved.
I always wanted that, I think,’ she faltered.
‘What do you mean, you think?’
‘I’m starting to wonder if I didn’t give him much of a chance. I handled everything myself. It never seemed to bother him, he just went along.’
‘Well, did you take over because you had to, or did he step back because you took over?’
‘That’s the chicken and egg riddle, isn’t it? Who knows what came first?’
Max sighed. ‘Thing is, Sam, there are always two sides. Look at Mum. Sure Dad pissed off, no denying that. But whenever I spend too much time with her, I start to understand why.’
‘Was I like her?’ Sam asked uneasily.
‘I didn’t mean that –’
‘But was I making Jeff live a life he didn’t want, and the only way he could change it was to leave?’
‘You couldn’t make Jeff do anything he didn’t want to,’ Max insisted. ‘He’s a great big grown-up, for crying out loud. He made his own choices.’
Sam was all too aware of that – he’d chosen someone else.
The following week
Sam was vacuuming upstairs in Ellie’s room when she thought she heard the front door slam. It gave her a fright. The kids were at Jeff’s for the weekend and Maxine was coming over later. They planned to see a movie together. But that wouldn’t be Max, she always sang out when she let herself in. Sam switched off the vacuum cleaner and listened. Now she could hear heavy footsteps on the stairs.
She took a deep breath, telling herself that a burglar doesn’t slam doors and thud noisily up stairs. She stepped out onto the landing, sighing with relief when she saw it was Josh.
But hold on, what was Josh doing here?
‘Joshua, what are you doing here?’ she frowned.
He didn’t look up as he passed her. ‘I’m not goin’ there any more.’
‘What? Josh, what’s this about?’ She almost ran to keep up with his strides. ‘How did you get home?’
‘Bus and train.’
‘Does your father know where you are?’
He walked into his room and turned, clutching the doorknob. ‘Nuh.’
‘Josh . . .’ Sam stood plaintively looking up him. ‘Do you want to talk about it?’
‘Nuh.’ He closed the door.
She breathed out. What the hell was going on? She walked downstairs to the kitchen and picked up the phone, dialling Jeff’s number. He answered almost immediately.
‘Jeff, it’s Sam. Josh is here. What’s going on?’
She heard him sigh. ‘Oh, thank God. When did he get there?’
‘Just a few minutes ago. What’s going on, Jeff? why did he leave?’
‘I don’t know.’
‘What?’
‘I honestly don’t know, Sam. He was up before we were, he had breakfast and then he went up to the skate bowl.’
‘On his own?’
‘Oh, don’t start, Samantha. Since when have you ever gone to watch him skating?’
‘But it’s a strange place –’
‘He’s been coming here for over six months, Sam. Besides, I went up after about half an hour to check on him and he wasn’t there. We’ve been searching the area ever since.’
‘Why didn’t you call me?’
‘What could you do about it? Except freak out, which is exactly what you’re doing now.’
‘Well, what do you reckon, Jeff? He’s my son! What if something had happened to him?’
‘Thank God it didn’t. Did he tell you what’s wrong?’
‘No, of course not, he doesn’t want to talk about it.’ Sam paused. ‘Except to say that he’s not going to your place any more.’
‘What?’
‘What happened there, Jeff?’
‘Nothing, I swear. He was quiet at breakfast and then he left.’
‘Something must have happened.’
‘Well, I don’t know what. He’s been sour for months. I don’t know what’s wrong with the kid.’
‘His parents splitting up might have something to do with it.’
‘He was sour way before that.’
‘Maybe that was because his father was never around?’
‘Jesus, Sam. Okay, let’s fight about ancient history.’
Sam didn’t say anything. He was right, it was hardly the time to be trying to score points.
Jeff sighed loudly. ‘Should I come over?’
‘He won’t talk to me at the moment. I doubt he’s going to talk to you either.’
They were both silent for a moment.
‘Look,’ Sam started, ‘I think he wants to be left alone for now. I’ll try to talk to him later. I’ll let you know if I find out anything.’
‘Yoohoo, it’s me!’
That was Max. Damn, Sam had forgotten to phone her to call off tonight. She didn’t want to go out and leave Josh on his own. Not that he had come out of his room all afternoon.
‘Hi,’ Sam greeted Max as she came into the kitchen. ‘I should have called, I
can’t go out tonight.’
‘Oh, what’s up?’
‘Josh is home.’
‘What, is he sick or something?’
‘No, he showed up here a few hours ago. He left Jeff’s without a word to anyone. They were all out searching for him.’
‘No shit,’ Max murmured, plonking herself on a stool. ‘What happened?’
‘No one knows. Jeff swears nothing happened at his place, and Josh won’t tell me anything.’
Max sat for a moment, staring at the floor. ‘Do you want me to talk to him?’
Sam shrugged. ‘You’re welcome to try, but I’m not sure if you’ll get anywhere.’
Sam realised she was pacing the kitchen floor. Max had been upstairs for more than twenty minutes. She wondered what they were talking about. Perhaps Josh hadn’t told her anything, but at least he had let her stay.
She heard Max’s footsteps on the stairs and she came to the doorway, watching her anxiously. Max looked pensive.
‘Did he tell you anything?’
Max sighed. ‘You’re going to need a drink.’
‘What?’ Sam said fearfully, turning to follow her back into the kitchen.
Max looked at her. ‘Don’t worry. He’s alright, I mean he’s not hurt or in trouble or anything. I just think you’re going to need a drink. And if you don’t, then I do.’
Sam waited while Max poured them both a glass of wine. They sat on stools at the island bench.
‘There’s no other way to say this,’ Max began. She took a mouthful of wine. ‘Josh can hear Jeff and Jodi together at night.’
‘Together?’
‘Together,’ she repeated meaningfully.
Sam gulped down half the contents of her glass. ‘Why, how?’
‘You know how he sleeps out in the living room on a sofa bed?’ Max reminded her. ‘Their room comes directly off the living room apparently, and he can hear them at night.’
Sam felt a little stunned. ‘How is he?’
‘Embarrassed, confused, angry.’ Max shrugged. ‘You know how hard it is for kids to cope with the idea that their parents have sex, let alone one of their parents having sex with someone else.’ She paused. ‘And it’s been even harder on Josh because he didn’t want to tell you. He didn’t want to upset you.’
Sam felt tears pricking her eyes.
‘The poor kid’s been holding it in for months because he had no one he could talk to about it.’
‘No wonder he’s been sour,’ Sam muttered, staring at her glass. ‘Oh, shit, I’m going to have to tell Jeff.’
Max drained her glass. ‘Don’t envy you that one, Sherl.’
‘What did you say to Josh? He didn’t expect you not to tell me, did he?’
Max shook her head. ‘Oh, I think he knew the escapade today was going to bring it all out in the open. So I suppose it was a kind of cry for help.’
Sam looked at Max. ‘I have to do this right away, get it over with.’
She picked up the phone and dialled Jeff’s number as she walked out to the family room. She heard it ring, a second time, a third. Then he picked up.
‘Jeff Holmes,’ he said automatically, but Sam could hear the strain in his voice.
‘Hi, it’s me.’
He breathed out. ‘How’s Josh? Have you talked to him?’
‘No, but Max did.’ Sam hesitated. God, she didn’t know how to put this.
‘So . . . ?’ Jeff said impatiently.
Sam took a deep breath. ‘Jeff, he can hear you and Jodi at night.’
‘What? What do you mean?’
Christ. Did she have to spell it out for him? ‘He can hear you together. At night. Think about it, Jeff!’
‘Oh . . .’ His voice died away.
They said nothing for a few moments. It was excruciating.
‘So,’ Sam resumed, ‘I guess you’re going to have to do something about it.’
‘What, you expect me not to have sex, is that it, Sam?’ he said tightly.
She sighed. ‘I don’t expect anything, I’m just the messenger here, Jeff. Don’t shoot me.’
‘But you must really be enjoying this, getting to dictate to me. Ever since the issue over Jessica’s phone you’ve been wanting to stick it to me, haven’t you?’
‘Yeah, I’m loving it,’ she retorted. ‘I so wanted to have an argument with you about your sex life with your new lover.’
He didn’t respond.
‘Look,’ Sam gritted her teeth. She felt pissed off that she had been put in this situation and she wasn’t going to wear his anger. ‘You can bonk your brains out for all I care. I’m just telling you that your son’s upset because he can hear you; so, for his sake, not mine, you may have to restrain yourselves when he’s there.’
She hung up the phone and tossed it on the sofa, breathing heavily. Not half a minute had passed when it rang. She picked the handset up again.
‘Sam?’
‘What?’
‘I’m sorry,’ Jeff said quietly.
She sighed. ‘I’d just like to make it perfectly clear to you that I would never use the kids to get back at you in any way. You should know that. And I don’t like being accused of it.’
‘I know Sam, I’m sorry. And I promise I won’t ever use the kids either. I shouldn’t have accused you.’ There was a pause. ‘It’s just a bit hard to deal with, okay?’
‘Tell me about it.’
He sighed. ‘You know, it’s not as if we’re at it all the time –’
‘Jeff,’ Sam interrupted him, ‘I really don’t want to know, okay?’
‘Sorry.’ He cleared his throat. ‘Do you think he’ll want to come here again?’
‘I don’t know, Jeff. You’re going to have to work that one out with Josh.’
‘He doesn’t seem to want to talk to me. I thought I was making a breakthrough at first. Now he’s as closed off as ever.’
‘Well, there’s been a reason for that.’
‘I guess you’re right,’ he sighed. ‘Do you mind if I bring the girls back a little earlier tomorrow? Give me a chance to talk to him.’
‘Sure.’
‘Thanks Sam. And sorry. And . . . thanks.’
April
From Sent Subject
Hal Buchanan Monday 9:16AM What happened
Hal Buchanan Monday 9:16AM you promised?
Hal Buchanan Monday 9:16AM about that
Hal Buchanan Monday 9:16AM Football Game
Hal Buchanan Monday 9:15AM Hey
Sam found herself smiling at the screen as the emails appeared one at a time in her inbox. It had been just over a month since the black-tie dinner debacle, what was Hal Buchanan doing contacting her now? She’d avoided telling Sheila so far that he’d kind of ‘dropped off’ her client list, but she knew the day of reckoning was nigh and she’d have to explain herself.
But now, out of the blue, he’d given her a reprieve. All the excuses about him not being a suitable client suddenly evaporated and Sam decided he deserved a prompt and personal reply. She checked her teledex and picked up the phone, dialling the direct work number he’d given her.
‘Hal Buchanan.’
‘So, interested in football game, hear I you are?’
‘Come again?’
‘I received a very odd string of emails today.’
‘Hey Samantha, nice to hear from you.’
‘I’m still trying to decipher it. Do you want me to read it out to you?’
‘Go ahead.’
‘It says, and I quote, “What happened you promised about that football game, hey”.’
‘Well, that’s the fault of the ISP.’
Sam laughed.
‘I’m telling you, there’s no way to control the order the server sends your mail.’
‘So why did it work for me?’
‘Beginner’s luck.’
‘Okay, so I won’t say anything about bad workmen blaming their tools.’
‘And I was so hoping I was going to get a little more of
your sass.’
‘Sass?’ she scoffed. ‘What on earth is sass?’
‘It’s what you’re real good at. Being a smart ass.’
Sam grinned. ‘Okay, I promise I’m going to bite my tongue so hard from now on, it’ll bleed.’
‘Well, don’t do that. But, hey, what about that football game you promised?’
‘Has the season started?’
There was a moment of silence. ‘Do you actually know anything about football, Sam?’
She breathed out heavily. ‘No,’ she admitted. ‘But my son knows all there is to know and he’ll come with us, if that’s okay with you?’
And if that was okay with Josh. She hadn’t even mentioned it to him as she had not expected to hear from Hal again. Josh was lately more non-communicative than ever, if that was possible. The episode with his father had left him sullen and angry. He resented having to go there, and from what she could glean from Jessica, he made the weekends an ordeal for everyone. But Jeff hadn’t complained to Sam. He wouldn’t dare.
‘Can I ask you something, Hal?’ Sam said tentatively.
‘Sure.’
‘What made you decide to contact me again?’
‘I’m sorry?’
‘Well,’ she took a breath, ‘you know, after the way I acted . . .’
He didn’t say anything.
Sam cleared her throat. ‘I was just wondering, that’s all.’
He paused. ‘I contacted you because I want to go to the football, Sam. I thought that was obvious.’
Now she was embarrassed. She sounded like a schoolgirl. This was business and Hal was her client. Which was exactly how she wanted it. ‘Oh, okay, sure. Right, well, I’ll organise it and get back to you.’
‘Great.’
‘Bye then.’
‘Oh, Sam?’
‘Yes?’
‘I also figured you deserved another chance,’ he added.
Sam felt flushed. ‘Oh, right. Well, I won’t disappoint you.’
‘I’m counting on it.’
Saturday
Sam was packing the last few things into a picnic basket when the doorbell rang.
‘Get that, would you, Jess? It’ll be Mr Buchanan. And be pleasant.’
Wife for Hire Page 16
