The outside door clicked with the opening lock a second before her parents walked through. Her burly daddy, who rarely said much, lumbered into her room with a small white box in his hands. He set the confection store carton on the end table and dropped a quick kiss on top of her head.
“Love you, Gabby girl.”
Then he was gone. Much like her growing up years. She’d always been sure of his love but his presence had been in short supply. He passed her mother coming in as he ducked out to his room. The television vibrated lightly through the wall, the sports channel no doubt.
Her mother still hovered across the room. “Do you mind if I sit and join you? Those pralines your dad bought are to die for.”
“Sure, Mom, knock yourself out.” She nudged the box toward her mother.
Dropping into a fat floral chair by the window, Christine pulled one of the caramel pecan treats from the box, breaking off a bite at a time as she nibbled and stared out the window. Gabrielle kept waiting for the lecture or third degree, but it never came.
Finally, she couldn’t stand the pressure of waiting any longer. “Go ahead and ask, Mom.”
Her mother looked over quizzically, smoothing back her short blond bob. “Ask what?”
“About Hank and me. You came all this way, so you might as well say your piece.”
“I came all this way because my grandson had surgery and this was the soonest I could leave your little sisters. And I came to meet this new man in your life who’s obviously very important to you.”
“He’s not in my life anymore.” Gabrielle eyed the box of pralines, but her stomach hurt so badly she couldn’t eat.
“Looked to me last night like you’re a major part of his life and family.” Her mother popped another bite in her mouth.
Gabrielle hugged her knees. “That party was all for show, staged for a magazine shoot.”
“I’m not talking about the fancy dinner. I’m talking about the expression in his eyes when he looks at you. That man loves you.”
Just hearing those words cut right through her heart. “Mom, he may have had feelings for me, but we never stood a chance. Anything we had would have always been tangled up in his survivor’s guilt. He will always see me as his best friend’s girl and that’s not something I can fight.”
“Do you still see yourself as Kevin’s fiancée?”
That stopped her short. “Of course not. I understand that Kevin is gone, and I’m helpless to change that.”
“Helpless? That’s a strange word choice. Why would you feel helpless?”
Gabrielle gawked at her mother. “You’ve got to be kidding. How could I feel anything but helpless?”
Her mother set aside the praline, her attention zeroing in. “There’s nothing you could have done for Kevin. You’re not Wonder Woman.”
A dark snort of laughter burst from her. “That’s rich, coming from you. You’re the ultimate wonder woman. You make everything look easy.”
“Now that’s just silly, dear. Life is anything but easy.” Her mother moved smoothly from the chair to sit beside Gabrielle on the bed. “Being a military wife and mother is full of tough challenges.”
She searched her mom’s face for some sense that her mom was joking but found only complete honesty. Her mother truly didn’t see herself as the conquer-all woman everyone else perceived her to be. “Why didn’t you ask for help?”
“What was complaining going to get me? My family was an ocean away. My husband was getting shot at in another country. And I had five children to take care of.” She flattened her hands to her thighs. “Honest to God, I didn’t have time to complain.”
Gabrielle understood that feeling well enough lately.
“If there had been help available, I would have embraced it with both hands. For more time to read to my kids. Or even to read a book for myself while soaking in a bubble bath.” She sighed, rolling her green eyes in imaginary bliss.
Gabrielle’s heart ached as she thought of how perceptive Hank had been about her wish for a long soak alone, saturating herself in lavender-scented bubbles. Some might consider that a small thing, but seeing her mother brought a hefty reminder of Ballard family values—thoughtfulness, doing things for others, that’s what mattered more than money.
Christine took her daughter’s hands in hers. “It’s not like I knew how to handle everything in those days. You just don’t remember the burned meals or the time I wrecked the car because I forgot to pick your brother up at kindergarten, then I drove too fast scared to death because I was late. Believe me, I cried then. As for the Wonder Woman issue…” Her mother’s German accent got stronger when she was fired up, turning her Ws into V sounds. “I am not perfect now, just better at handling things than I was then.”
Could her mother be right? That she’d simply forgotten the more frazzled days? “If you learned over time, don’t I deserve the same chance?”
“You have a point.” She stroked back Gabrielle’s hair as she’d done millions of times, always there, always loving, and that did count for a lot. “I know I interfere quite often. What is it they call that here in the States… Being an airplane mother?”
Gabrielle grinned. “A helicopter mom, always hovering.”
“Ah, that makes more sense. I never understood the airplane analogy.”
Smiling, Gabrielle leaned into her mom and they laughed together.
Her mother’s arm slid around her shoulders. “Do you love this man? Do you love Hank?”
Gabrielle didn’t even have to think to know. The truth settled in her heart, the only thing that made sense in her life. Why was it, though, that love had to always bring so much pain? “Yes, Mom, I love Hank more than I’ve loved anyone in my life, except for my son.”
For once, she didn’t feel guilty about admitting she did have deeper feelings for Hank than she’d had for Kevin. She had loved Kevin and she’d done her best to be a good fiancée, staying with the relationship longer than she should have. If anything, she’d hurt him most by hanging on too long when there’d been signs the relationship might not be a good fit.
Her mother hugged her tighter. “Then you don’t need to have all the perfect answers right now. No one is a wonder woman from day one. Do the best you can, don’t give up and the rest will sort itself out with time if you are determined to work at it.”
Her mother’s advice shuffled around inside her until it settled, making such perfect sense she didn’t know why she hadn’t seen it before. She didn’t have to have everything figured out before moving forward. It was okay to love Hank and be with Hank while they resolved their problems, because yes, she did want to find a way to be with the man she loved. Forever. “I am determined, Mom. Very much so.”
“Then what are you sitting around here for? Go get your man. Your father and I welcome the chance to babysit our grandson.”
Complete love and acceptance radiated from her mother’s face. Unconditional love, just like she felt for Max. Gabrielle wrapped her arms around her mom and held on tight.
“Danke, Mama.” She adored the nuances of her mother’s language. Danke. Thank you, but less formal for a family member. A loved one. “Danke.”
And now she just hoped she wasn’t too late to claim Hank’s love that she’d so foolishly almost tossed away.
* * *
Family dinners two nights in a row?
Hank felt as if he’d set a new record in togetherness. But his relatives had all come to New Orleans for him. He couldn’t just boot them out of town. So he parked himself at the table while everyone spoke on top of each other. They weren’t there to intrude. They simply wanted to be a part of his life, see him after his deployment and show him some love.
And after his conversation with his father earlier, he had to confess that the whole Renshaw-Landis connection was starting to grow on him. He would have to be thickheaded not to recognize the gift of this much support—a room full of people who would drop everything for him.
Tonight’s mea
l was less formal than the photo shoot dinner. Instead of gowns, uniforms and tuxedos, everyone wore jeans or khakis. The children were included, too, the table packed with high chairs and chatter about elementary school plays. The menu ranged from Creole shrimp and grits to hot dogs with macaroni and cheese. Still, even with nearly thirty kids and adults seated, the table seemed lacking to him without Gabrielle and Max.
Since that talk with his father, he’d been wracking his brain on how to win her back in a way that still gave her the time and space she needed. He refused to accept failure. He needed to be smart about this. His whole future was at stake.
As he speared another fat Gulf shrimp that was totally wasted on him tonight, the doorbell rang and Leonie raced to answer it.
Frowning, he set his fork back on the plate. The general raised an eyebrow and two of his stepbrothers shot to their feet.
What the hell? While he knew no one would get by security without the proper identification, it would be helpful if they started announcing some of these unexpected guests. What family members were left?
“Hank?”
His ears had to be fooling him, creating the sound of the voice he wanted to hear more than anything.
Then miraculously, so damn amazingly, Gabrielle stood in the archway to the dining room. His heart got stuck somewhere in his throat. He pushed his chair back and stood, ignoring the weight of his family’s eyes all trained on him. He could see only Gabrielle, with her wind-flushed cheeks and her loose, silky blond hair.
Most of all, he saw her beautiful smile.
Relief scoured through him. For whatever reason, she’d come back to him, and he would be damned before he did or said one thing to push her away again. So he smiled back at her, but waited, letting her take the lead for now.
Gabrielle walked deeper into the dining room, her sexy legs striding confidently closer. “I’m sorry to disturb everyone’s dinner. Would you mind if I stole Hank from you? I’m not sure I’ll bring him back anytime soon. In fact, I may want to keep him for a very, very long time.”
Laughter rippled down the table, and he didn’t miss how one of his sisters shouted that Gabrielle was welcome to hang on to him permanently.
His stepmother reached for Gabrielle’s hand. “I’m so glad you came back.”
Gabrielle smiled full out, not a shadow in sight. “Me, too.”
Past ready to have her to himself, Hank palmed her waist and followed her out into the foyer before facing her. At first, there were no words. He just took in the beauty of her face that he’d dreamed of so often while he was overseas. The thought of not having her in his life…
He swallowed down a lump in his throat and cupped her shoulders, needing to touch her. “What brought you here tonight?”
Her hands fell to rest on his chest. “I have a surprise for you.”
“Your arrival is plenty of a surprise.”
“Not by a long shot. Now close your eyes.” A mischievous glint lit her emerald eyes. “Trust me.”
And he did. He trusted her with his love and his life.
Hank shut his eyes, hopeful as hell that this was going to go well for him. A silky cloth trailed over his fingers, up his arm then over his eyes. Realization slid over him just as Gabrielle tied the blindfold behind his head.
Oh, yeah.
Hank clasped her wrist, his thumb stroking her racing pulse. “I assume I’ll be keeping my clothes on for now since my family’s in the next room.”
“You’re every bit as safe in my hands as I am in yours.” Her voice caressed his senses, the words as satiny as the fabric she’d teased over his skin.
Hooking her arm with his, she guided him smoothly toward the back of the house and out the door. The cool evening air wrapped around him while he waited for her next move.
Gabrielle rested her head against his shoulder. “My car’s a tighter fit than yours so you’ll need to watch your head stepping inside.”
So they were leaving. Interesting. But anything Gabrielle did intrigued him, always had. “We can take mine if you prefer. The keys are in my pocket.”
“Hmm… . Sounds like you’re propositioning me.” The tips of her fingers hooked in the front pocket of his jeans.
“I’m hopeful, Gabrielle, but taking nothing for granted.”
He could have sworn he felt her lips brush his shoulder, but then his mind focused completely on her hand dipping in to fish out his keys with what had to be deliberate precision. She pulled back out slowly, her fingers rubbing against his increasing arousal.
A low growl rumbled in his throat. “I really hope we’re alone out here.”
“The security guard has his back to us. He’s watching the street.”
“I can’t wait to get inside the car with you—only you.”
“Patience, Hank. I promise this will all be worth it.”
With that vow hanging between them, she led him smoothly to his SUV and settled them both inside. Seconds later, they were on the road, with her behind the wheel and him still blindfolded. While he was a navigator, even he started to lose any sense of direction after a few minutes of her speeding around curves and turns.
He resisted the urge to grab for the armrest. “You drive like a maniac.”
“I learned on the autobahn.” The car veered left hard and fast before jerking to a halt.
“How did I not know this about you before?”
“We have a lot to learn about each other, and I look forward to that.” She opened her door and the sound of water lapping echoed.
Lake Ponchartrain.
It made perfect sense.
They’d discussed coming here to talk after the photo shoot, for time alone together, to build on their relationship. Now she was fulfilling that plan that had been cut short.
His door opened and she pulled off his blindfold. Sure enough, Gabrielle stood silhouetted by the lake, the setting sun casting tequila-colored warmth over her face.
He joined her, holding his hand out for hers, clasping in a perfect fit. The blindfold she’d used on him—the satin sash from her bathrobe—trailed from her pocket in a floral splash riding the wind. They walked that way for at least ten minutes, reminding him of times past when they’d enjoyed that rare gift of two people able to coexist even in silence.
As the sky grew darker and the city lights flickered to life, Gabrielle’s steps slowed, her attention out there somewhere on the lake.
“Hank, my love for you is like that lake, it’s powerful and fluid, and a natural force I can’t deny any longer.” She stopped, facing him, as serious as he’d ever seen her. “I want to be with you forever, here, Bossier City, wherever that love takes us around the world.”
Her declaration was even more than he could have hoped for and almost sent him to his knees. He clasped her shoulders and put his all in what he’d been waiting two years to tell her. He wouldn’t botch it this time.
“Gabrielle, I’ve been in love with you since the first time I saw you. But I’m willing to take it one day at a time if that’s what you need, because every day with you is better than a lifetime without you.”
“Oh, God, Hank, I want it all with you, so much.” She cradled his face in her hands and kissed him, fully, openly and with the promise of more to come. “I love you, more than I ever thought it would be possible to love anyone. I don’t want to wait. I just want us to be happy together every day for the rest of our lives.”
He hauled her close and let the relief shudder through him until he could trust himself to speak again. He buried his face in her hair. “About my job in the military, if it’s a deal breaker for you, I’ll get out. I’ve done a lot of soul searching with my dad since you left. He helped me start coming to grips with what happened over there. He’s helping me reevaluate a lot of things. I know what’s most important to me now.”
“Hank,” she gasped, arching back. “Didn’t you hear me say that I love you, anywhere that takes us? You don’t have to give that up for me. I don’t want you to
do that.”
“Wait. Let me finish. Yes, my job is important to me, but you are more important and I’m not willing to lose you over this. I’m lucky. I have financial choices.”
She looked right back at him, her steely resolve glimmering in the hazy sunset. “I love you too much to ask you to give up something that’s so much a part of who you are. All I ask is that we’re partners, that we keep working at making our relationship stronger. And that we get a permanent home when you retire.”
She appeared to mean what she said, but he wasn’t risking his future with her by just grasping her offer without careful consideration. “How about we take it a day at a time with the military-life decision? If you change your mind, tell me. I may have followed my dad’s career path in some ways, but I have no dreams of being a general.”
“But you could be,” she insisted with a faith in him that he appreciated.
“I have plans for a business I would like to start, a spin-off with my computer partner. I was thinking New Orleans would make a good home base. In fact—if you agree—I would like to get a head start on that home by buying the Garden District house we’ve been renting. We’ll have roots here, whether I stay in the air force or not.”
Happiness and peace spread across her face. “I can live with that plan as long as I’m living with you.”
“And about our big, pushy families?” His thumb stroked along her neck, taking note of her speeding pulse and silky skin. “If we decide to invite them into our lives more often?”
“I think we’re lucky to have them,” she said without hesitation. “Beyond the fact that they’re actually pretty amazing people, they’re also very eager to babysit.”
His imagination sparked with how they could fill their time alone in a deserted stretch of moonlit water. “Are you propositioning me?”
She pulled the blindfold from her jeans pocket. “I have some plans of my own, if you’re game.”
He spread his arms wide. “I’m all yours.”
Honorable Intentions Page 15
