by Louise River
“Ah!”
His body stills. “Are you okay? Do I need to stop?”
“I’m great,” she smiles and kisses him hard.
“You feel so good,” he growls as he pumps against her. Her legs wrap around his waist and meets him thrust for thrust. He knows he’s not going to last too long, so she pauses. “Lift your legs.”
With ease, she unhooks her legs and lifts them around his shoulders without ever separating their bodies. Ryder shifts his knees for a better angle and starts pumping into her again, slowly at first.
Parker’s breathing becomes rapid. “I’m going to come.”
“Come for me,” he growls as he pumps faster into her. “Let go, baby.”
Her hands are in his hair and she throws her head back in pleasure. Her body starts to contract around him and she calls out his name. “Ryder!”
Her pleasure pushes him over the edge as he releases. “Parker!”
Once his vision returns, he eases out of her and lowers her legs back to the bed. After taking off the condom, he knots it and throws it in the garbage can next on the floor next to him. Lying next to her, they’re both panting. He turns to his side and pulls her body to his so he’s spooning her.
“You were right.” She draws absentmindedly on one hand clamped over her breast.
“About what?”
“It gets better.”
“I told you. Your body isn’t difficult to read at all.”
“It was a very good distraction. I needed that.”
“I’m glad I could be of help, kid.”
She turns in his arms so she’s facing him. “Let’s do it again.” His dick needed no further coaxing.
Chapter 18
Parker paces back and forth in the classroom of the church where she had Sunday school and confirmation classes. It’s been a week since everything bad happened. She smiles as she thinks about how she feels like heathen standing in church after her week of living in sin with Ryder. But she doesn’t care. Her feelings for him are strong, and she couldn’t deny them if she tried. He’d been there for her through everything, and last night he just held her as she cried. It was the night before she had to give the eulogy at her parent’s funeral, and she cried herself to sleep. And when she woke up, he was still holding her.
“Not a relationship guy my butt,” she says to herself.
He even volunteered to go back to the house for her to retrieve a dress for the funeral. She runs her hands down her legs to smooth out the fabric of the dark blue dress Anne helped her pick out. It was for the daddy-daughter dance shortly before graduation. His eyes had filled with tears as he saw her come down the stairs. She remembers joking with him that she wasn’t getting married, and they were just going to a dance. He told her how beautiful she was, and how proud he was of the woman she’d become.
“I hope I don’t disappoint you, Daddy.”
A knock comes at the door and Ryder pokes his head in. “Can I come in?”
Smiling slightly, she nods her head. Her heart swells at the sight of him in a suit. He looks the most uncomfortable she’s ever seen him, but he looks handsome. His huge biceps are straining the fabric, but he did it for her.
“I brought someone who might be able to help calm you down. Is it okay if I invite them in?”
Sighing, she nods her head. She’s sure Sam is pacing outside the door trying to find the right words to say. She’s forgiven him, but she doesn’t know how she’s going to handle the sadness she’ll feel when she finally sees him. It’s like looking at a vision of her father.
“She’s waiting for you,” Ryder says behind him and moves to the side. Instead of Sam, Paige walks in the doorway. Standing before her, she’s wearing a black sundress with no makeup and swollen eyes. She’s lightly sobbing, and her face quickly turns blotchy as her sobs become full on hysterics.
“Ryder?” Parker asks in confusion.
“Paige, we talked about this,” he says to her. “Parker, you know I will do whatever you need. I can hold you while you cry all night, but I don’t have the history with you she does. I don’t know the right words to say, or the best way to calm you down. In a church anyway. She knows what you’re feeling just because you feel it. I don’t. And while you’re perfectly fine to tell me how you feel, I also know how nervous you are. And scared. You need your best friend.”
“Parker,” Paige sobs. After catching her breath, she looks right her. “I. Am. So. Sorry.” Her words come out between sobs, and Parker can’t help but smile.
Holding out her arms, she motions for Paige to come in for a hug. She rushes over, almost knocking Parker over.
“I should’ve been there. I should’ve answered your calls. I should’ve checked to see if you were okay. I should’ve been there. Your friendship means more to me than anything else, and I threw it all away. For Aaron.” The sound of disgust makes both Ryder and Parker chuckle.
“Paige,” Parker says as she pulls away from the hug, “let’s forget about all of this for right now, okay?”
“I called Sam. I figured you’d be at his house. He told me you were with Ryder. I kept watching to see if you were outside so I could talk to you. A casual approach, you know? But you didn’t come out. I know I should’ve come over there, but I was chicken.”
“I saw her in the entrance, pacing a hole in the floor, looking for you. Her head would fly up as soon as anyone with blonde hair approached. Even Eddie. I asked if she wanted to come talk to you,” Ryder says.
“He said you could use your best friend. I told him I wasn’t a best or even a friend at this point. He told me to just set it aside for right now. You needed me.”
Ryder looks at the ground. “Well, you know, I’ll be outside.”
“That sounds like a relationship guy move, Ryder.” She knows he’s smiling as he shuts the door. She brings it up more frequently now.
As the door shuts, Parker can see the questions swirling around in Paige’s head, trying to decide which to ask first. “How are you?”
“Honestly?”
“Honestly.”
“I’m scared to death, Paige,” Parker whispers. “I don’t know how I’m going to do this.”
“You will do be fine. It will be hard. But everyone is here to support you. We all love you and just want to help get you through this difficult time.”
“I never thought I’d be doing a eulogy for my parents. Not at this age. And not at the same time. I mean, sure, when I was sixty, maybe. How do I do this? Should I be the one to do this?”
“I’m not going to lie to you. It’s probably going to suck. But there is no one here better to give a eulogy for your parents than you. No one loved them as much as you did. No one knew them like you did. And no one loved you as much as they loved you. Everyone out there knows that.”
“I am truly, one hundred percent alone now. Minus a psycho brother who may or may not be alive out there and wants to kill me. I have never been more terrified than I am right now. How do I live in a world where my parents don’t?” Tears start to fall from her eyes.
“You live for them,” Paige says wiping the tears from Parker’s face. “You are not alone. Sam is here. He looks pretty rough right now but you and I both know he’d walk over fire for you, babe. And you have me. Granted, probably not the most comforting thought at the moment. And you definitely have Ryder. He seems willing to move heaven and earth for you, girl.”
“He’s been really great this past week. I don’t think I could’ve gotten through it without him. He knew when to distract me, and he knew when to listen to me. Last night he just let me cry myself to sleep. I sometimes have to work to get him out of his own head, but he’s a truly amazing person.”
“I may not be allowed to ask this yet, but are you two together?”
“I don’t know,” Parker answers honestly. “He keeps telling me he’s not a relationship guy, but then he goes and does all of these relationship guy things. All I know is I have strong feelings for him, and he mak
es me feel safe. And considering I have someone who wants to kill me, that says something, I think.”
“You smile when you talk about him. Something that can put a smile on your face right now is pretty big.”
“Are you and Aaron together?”
Paige steps back as though Parker had just reached out and slapped her across the face. “No! I haven’t talk to him since that night.”
“If you want to be with him, you can. It’s fine, Paige. I wasn’t lying when I said that.”
“Is there any hope of us being friends again?”
“Paige, you’re here now. I may have needed you then. Actually, I know I needed you then, but I really need you now. And even though you were scared, you came.”
“I have to be honest with you, Park. I have to come clean.”
“Do you really?” Parker groans. “Like, is this a life or death, gotta-tell-Parker-cause-she-might-die-tomorrow kid of thing? Or is it a could-probably-not-tell-Parker-and-she’d-be-fine kind of thing?”
“I have to clear my conscience. And we’re in church.”
Parker takes a deep breath and holds it.
“The night you walked in on Aaron and me, it wasn’t the first time,” she says quickly.
Letting the air out, Parker laughs.
“Why are you laughing?”
“Did the fact I kept asking ‘again?’ make you think I was confused on that?”
“Honestly, that whole night is a blur for me.”
“Besides, you two were avoiding me for a week. I didn’t think that was just a lot of pent up sexual tension that finally exploded. I just didn’t know why you were avoiding me.”
“It was stupid. So stupid. Remember a few weeks ago when the three of us went to the movies? After you left us, Aaron was making fun of me for being the perpetual third wheel. I was annoyed with him, so I made a comment about how I won’t be a third wheel when you leave for college. There won’t be third in the equation anymore.”
“Bonding over me leaving.”
“He pointed out you’d be leaving me, too. And then one thing lead to another, and then you walked in on us. But it’s no excuse.”
“I’m not mad you slept with him. Honestly. I was hurt about how you just cut me out of your life when I needed you most. Losing my boyfriend is whatever. Losing my best friend? That was the hardest thing to go through. Until now.”
“Park, I’m so sorry. I don’t know if there are enough words to express how sorry I really am.”
“It’s going to take some time before I can trust you again.”
Relief falls over Paige’s face. “I fully understand. I consider myself lucky you’re even talking to me right now. You had every right to slap me across the face and slam the door on me when I walked in.”
“I was in shock. I honestly thought you were Sam.”
“At least you weren’t hoping for Aaron.”
“I haven’t really thought much about him since that night.”
“He’s out there waiting for you, by the way. He thinks he’s the shoulder you need right now.”
“I hope he tries to come near me with Ryder around. Ryder hates him.”
“Are you mad at him?”
“I actually feel absolutely nothing for him. Like I said, we were over a long time ago. I just wasn’t quite ready to give up that part of my life yet.”
“That’s good, I guess.”
They stand in awkward silence for a few minutes before Paige ends it. “I don’t like this.”
“It’s weird.”
“I don’t know what to do. We’ve never had awkward silences before.”
“Maybe we should talk about something else? I could use a few minutes of not worrying about going out there.” She motions to the door.
“I know we’re in church, but I have to ask you something. About Aaron.”
“I could use a good laugh. What’s up?”
“He was my first, right?”
“I assumed.”
“Is it me? Was he terrible in bed because it was with me? Or is this what it’s supposed to be like and the media just makes us believe something different?”
Parker starts laughing. “Yeah, he’s terrible.”
“I thought the first two times were just me, because, well, I didn’t know what I was doing. But it-”
“Never gets better.”
“I don’t want to do it anymore. With anyone.”
“It gets better.”
“But you just said it didn’t.”
“Not with Aaron. He’s a lost cause.”
“Ryder?” Paige’s eyes get huge.
Parker shrugs.
“He’s good?”
“Mind. Blowing.”
“Oh, my,” Paige giggles and blushes. “This past week?”
“Like I said, he knew how to distract me.” She laughs. “But seriously, he’s sweet, kind, considerate, and so hot. He is exactly what I need. He’s strong when I’m week, and he has opened up to me about things he doesn’t share with anyone else. He’s a good guy all around, but he doesn’t see it. Which actually really breaks my heart.”
“I think you have it bad for this one.”
“Thank you.”
“For what?”
“Taking my mind off my parents for a minute.”
“Whatever you need, Parker, I’m here. I’m here even when you don’t want me to be. Forever. I will never make the same mistake I did before.”
“Good, because I might cut you if you sleep with Ryder.”
“I may have to take that risk,” Paige jokes. “He is so fine.” Parker’s smile falls and she looks serious at Paige. “I was kidding, Parker. I swear I was kidding.”
“I know. Would you sit with me out there?”
“I will do whatever you need me to do.”
Looking at the clock on the wall, dread fills her stomach. Paige reaches out and squeezes her hand. “It’ll be okay,” she says and hugs her before heading out the door toward the main entrance.
Aaron walks up to Ryder who is waiting for Parker to come out.
“Can I help you?” Ryder says flatly.
“She’s going to come back to me. We have a connection that runs deeper than anything you could have formed in a week.”
“Yeah, she’s told me all about your ‘connection,’ pal. And she can do whatever she needs to do because this is about her and what she needs. But I’m willing to bet good money on her never going back to you again.”
“You think you know her, but you don’t. We’ve been together for two years, and we’ve known each other since grade school. You can’t compete with that.”
“You’re right. We don’t have a history that runs that deep. But we have a connection you couldn’t touch even if you tried. Plus, I’ll never sleep with her best friend, so I’ve got that going for me.”
“You have a connection?” Aaron laughs ignoring any reference to Paige. “That’s cute.”
Paige stiffens next to Parker, but she squeezes her hand for reassurance. “Our connection is definitely none of your business, Aaron.”
“Baby, how are you?” Aaron puts on a pouty face.
Parker can see Ryder’s jaw clench as Aaron reaches out to touch her.
Taking a step away and towards Ryder, she looks at him. “What do you think you’re doing?”
“Comforting you. This has got to be terrible for you.”
“Yeah, it is. But you’re just making this weird. And uncomfortable. Please, just, don’t.”
“I know we have a lot to talk about but just know I’m here for you. I’m here when you need something to help take your mind off of everything.” He winks.
Ryder’s fists clench, but Parker puts her hand in his to calm him. “Seriously? At my parent’s funeral?”
“I know what you need, baby.”
“Ha, that’s the exaggeration of the year. What I need, ‘baby,’ is for you to leave me alone. We aren’t lovers, we aren’t friends, and as far as I’m concer
ned, we are barely acquaintances. I will not go to you for anything I need ever again.”
“You’re just mad, baby.”
“Aaron, you’re literally too stupid to get it. I’m not mad. I’m not sad. I don’t feel betrayed. I don’t feel pain. I legitimately feel absolutely nothing for. Now, please, do everyone a favor and don’t ever try to touch me again.”
“It’s time to go in,” Ryder says and rubs her neck.
Aaron’s eyes go wide, but he keeps his mouth shut.
“Paige, do you want to sit with me?”
“Yeah, that’s a hard pass. I’m sitting with Parker.”
He tries to stammer something, but turns and walks into the church instead.
“Ready?” Paige asks.
“No,” Parker whispers as Ryder pulls her close.
Chapter 19
“I don’t think I can do this,” Parker whispers.
Paige pulls Parker back and grabs her shoulders. Looking her square in the eyes she says, “You can do this. Everyone is here to support you. I know it’s scary. And I also know it’s real as soon as we step through those doors, but you are not alone. Not now. Not ever.”
Ryder looks at the two girls and feels better about bringing Paige to talk to Parker. He was nervous she’d be upset, but Paige is what she needed. And Paige was able to understand better than he was that this funeral is the final nail in the coffin, so to speak, of her parents really being gone. There would be no more blissful denial.
Parker looks at him. Her eyes are wide and her hands are trembling. “Sit with me?” Her voice is shaky.
“I wasn’t planning on sitting anywhere else, kid.”
Paige grabs her left and, and Parker reaches for Ryder’s with her other. When he takes it, she squeezes it. “Let’s go,” she whispers.
Ryder pushes the door open with his right hand, and everyone turns to face the three of them. The looks on their faces make him sick to his stomach. There is sympathy and pity on every single person’s face. Literally everyone in town is here. All of the shops and restaurants closed in support of Parker. God Bless Small Towns.
Parker continues to tremble as they walk, and Ryder releases her hand to wrap an arm around her shoulder to give her a comforting half hug as well as make sure she stays upright. “We got you, kid,” he whispers into her ear.
