by Lynn Stevens
The bottom line is yes, I’d love to meet you. Can we plan something after graduation?
Zac’s fingers froze around his phone. He swallowed hard. She said yes. His heart raced, and it took effort not to email her back and tell her where he lived. She could come over right now. As much as that sounded like a good idea, he knew it was definitely not one. She wanted to wait until after graduation. He could be patient. She wanted to meet. That’s what mattered. He hit reply and responded that they would meet when she was ready. It was short, to the point, and fast. He almost added his phone number but decided against it. They’d kept up the game of anonymity for this long, why not wait a little longer? She replied just as quickly with an okay. He stared at the screen, at that one little word. It was on her, and he was fine with that. He could wait. The anticipation was thrilling and terrifying and annoying all at the same time.
Zac didn’t want to lose this good mood, but he had promised Ford.
He picked up his phone and found Macie’s number under the name ‘Chomper’.
It rang three times before she picked up with a very pleasant, “What?”
“We need to talk,” he said. No sense in beating around the bush. Another cliché he had looked up. Hunters still beat bushes to shoot birds flying out in this day and age. It was old and modern at the same time. He appreciated that. “About the shower.”
“Not showering with you, Zac. We’ve had this discussion before.” A sniffle punctuated her sentence.
Zac ran his hand down his face. She’d been crying. “Are you okay?”
“Yeah, why?” At least she hadn’t lost her defensive tone.
“You’ve been crying.”
She sighed loudly into the phone, probably so he would know she was irritated. Such a Macie thing to do. “Not that you care, but it’s a good thing.”
“Crying is a good thing? Since when?” He let the confusion fill his tone. Women didn’t make sense and he wondered if they ever would. He also wondered if his mystery girl cried a lot.
“Since forever. Ever heard of tears of joy?”
“Yes, but I never understood it.” Why bother to cry when you could just smile?
“You’d have to be able to feel joy to understand.” She sniffled again. “Women have no problem expressing it.”
Talk about an ice pick to his chest. He pinched the bridge of his nose. “Men can express their feelings just fine, Macie.”
“Of course, how silly of me.” Her bite was back. He could almost see her nostrils flare. “Thank you for mansplaining. My silly little female mind just can’t comprehend such a thing.”
One of the things they fought about most was women versus men. Macie always had to throw her feminist weight behind everything. Zac understood most of where she came from—women made less money than men in the same field, women aren’t respected for their athletic ability, women aren’t allowed to stand on their own. He got that. But he also hated that she made him feel like crap about it. It wasn’t Zac’s fault. He supported Macie’s favorite causes on campus ‘Lafayette Liberties’ a women’s rights group, and donated to her technology drive for students who couldn’t afford laptops or tablets. Macie accused him of just throwing his money around.
“Can we not fight about this again?” He rubbed his forehead. How was he going to handle this for the next month?
“Fine. What do you want?”
“I told you, we need to talk about the shower.” Zac stood from his couch and stretched. “The invites are too ... girly for a joint shower.”
“Too girly? When did you even see them?”
I haven’t. “Today.” He paced the small hallway. “They’re perfect for a bridal shower but since it’s co-ed, they don’t represent the couple.”
“This is so stupid. Who has a fucking co-ed wedding shower? It’s absurd.”
“Oh, look, we actually agree on something.”
Macie laughed. She had a beautiful laugh. He could listen to it all day. If she didn’t have such a huge chip on her shoulder, they might be friends or tolerable acquaintances.
“Mace, I know it’s a pain in the ass. I know you put a lot of work into designing those invites. But—”
“Here we go,” she muttered.
“—can you just change the font to something less...” He didn’t want to offend her by saying feminine, but it hung in the air between them.
“I already sent them to Lauren to send to the printer.”
“So?”
“So, if she sent them to the printer, there’s nothing I can do now. It’s out of my hands.”
“And you’re not willing to make another neutral pattern for a small print run?” He knew he was pushing his luck, but he promised Ford he’d talk to her about it. One thing Zac never did was break a promise.
“You know what pisses me off about this entire thing?” Macie’s voice cracked as if she might cry again. “I love Lauren and Ford, but they keep forgetting I’m doing this for free. Lauren at least thanks me, but Ford...I don’t get it. He doesn’t appreciate anything I’m doing here. It took me hours to make the shower invites and then I had to change them because they wanted it to be a wedding shower instead of bridal shower. And I changed it. Without complaining, I might add. Now you’re telling me that you want me to change them again? No. Even if Ford and Lauren came up to me, I wouldn’t. They need to go in the mail by the end of next week. And they still need to be printed. There isn’t any time.” Macie sniffled again, and this time Zac thought it had nothing to do with joy and everything to do with him. “I worked my ass off on those damn things. The least anybody could say is thanks.”
He opened his mouth, but the silence filled in his ears. “Macie?”
Nothing. The line was dead.
No one had hung up on him since high school. He wanted to call her back, but he knew she wouldn’t answer. And what would he say? That she was right. He rewound his memories since Ford and Lauren started planning the wedding. Macie had volunteered to make the invitations and the graphics, so they would have something unique. She’d saved them money, which Zac respected. He couldn’t remember a single time Ford thanked her. That was something he’d have to talk to his friend about.
MARK CALLED MACIE THE next day while she was in class. He needed her schedule for the last week of school and the days off for the wedding.
Her job. She loved the sound of that. She typed a quick text to Mark with her schedule.
He replied two minutes later. How’s my application looking?
Macie smiled, but she didn’t want to lead him on too much. Interviews have been put on hold for the time being. The HR department is moving to a new location and needs more time to review.
I understand. You do know I have my application in other places? he replied.
Of course, you can’t only apply one place. Just let me know if you receive any offers so I can remove you from the candidate pile. This was easier, letting him down this way. He’d move on. She wouldn’t have the awkwardness at work when it didn’t work out. And it wouldn’t. In her gut, she knew that even as she flirted with him.
She added the dates of the shower, the two potential party dates, and the wedding date in another text. Mark simply responded, Noted, but doubtful all days will be approved.
That wasn’t a surprise. Lauren would understand. If Macie was going to miss anything, it was the shower. Macie just didn’t know when the party would be, but she was hoping for the weekend before. Her preliminary bachelorette planning had everything prepared for two weeks before and the week before the ceremony, but nothing had been settled. Macie wasn’t sure if Lauren wanted that big of a break between the fun day and the big day. She just had to talk to Zac to confirm what would work best for everyone involved. The shower was a month before the wedding on a date pre-approved by the all-mighty Sylvia. Lauren’s mom was out of town every weekend for conventions and conferences where she promoted her books, her healthcare products, or spoke to fellow health nuts. Lauren loved that her mo
m was finally following her dream, but she’d been heartbroken, too. Macie had held her friend the night Sylvia told Lauren not to marry Ford.
“His dreams, his life will be more important than yours. He’ll want kids. Then you’ll raise them on your own while he continues to live. Your life will be in suspended animation,” Sylvia had said. “I know you love him. And I know he loves you. Just wait. Don’t rush into this.”
Macie understood and secretly agreed with Sylvia but for different reasons. She just didn’t think it was a very Mom thing to say. Her own mother would’ve supported her unconditionally. Sylvia and Lauren’s father were still married, but only because of years of intense therapy. Bitterness still seeped into Sylvia’s voice. She’d put her own career on hold to support her husband. When she was ready to get back into the workforce, Lauren came along then Lauren’s little brother. Sylvia was incredibly successful now as a health and nutrition guru, but she resented everyone for holding her back.
Maybe that’s why Lauren kept Sylvia in the dark about her app. The bidding war was heating up. As it stood, Lauren would be able to do whatever she wanted after the summer she gave to Sylvia. Lauren had promised her mother she’d work for her to develop an app and to update her mother’s websites. But Lauren had options too. The three standing job offers wouldn’t go anywhere. She’d either start a job or freelance. Macie had a feeling Lauren had already decided, but she wasn’t telling anyone yet. Not even her fiancé.
Macie strolled out of the art building and into the quad. The sun was high overhead and the air teased of a hot Louisiana afternoon. She tilted her head back, letting the sun soak into her skin.
Her phone vibrated in her hand and she smiled when she saw the name on the screen.
“Hey, Pete. What’s up?”
“Do you have the notes from class today?”
“Be more specific. We have three classes together and you missed all of them.” Macie held in her laugh. Pete was a good guy, but he tended to party too much and study too little. He wasn’t anywhere near the top of their class and, yet, he had a job back in Baton Rouge already. How he landed it, she had no idea. He wasn’t the only person whose grades weren’t as good as hers who had jobs before she did.
“Okay, all of them.” He chuckled under his breath. “You know that girl I’ve been chasing?”
Macie laughed. “You mean Cate with a C. You’ve only asked her out since sophomore year.”
“Yep, that’s her. Apparently, I’m not as suave as I think. She thought I’d been joking this whole time.” He paused, and Macie heard a door close in the background. “She finally said yes a few days ago. We haven’t left my room since.”
“That is information I did not need to know, Pete.” Macie wrinkled her nose. “But congrats.”
“Thanks, and can I have your notes?” he asked a little more frantically then before.
“Yeah, but you’re buying me lunch.” Macie sat on the edge of the fountain and wrote herself a reminder on her hand to give Pete copies.
“Deal.” Pete sighed. “And thanks, Mace. You’ve been a lifesaver these last few years.”
Pete ended the call. Macie didn’t even have time to think about Pete when her phone rang again. She was suddenly popular. That wasn’t something she relished. She swiped to answer without looking at the screen.
“Hey, Mace,” Ford said on the other end.
He never called her. Ever. Unless Lauren was in full freak-out mode. She sat ramrod straight. “What’s wrong? Is Lauren okay?”
“Yeah, she’s fine. I just...” He hesitated and sighed. “Look, I realized something and I need to man up and apologize. I’m sorry.”
“Okay. For what?” This was getting weirder by the second.
“You’ve done a lot for the wedding and I... I was a jerk about the shower invitations. They really are fantastic. You do amazing work. So thank you for doing everything. We... I really do appreciate it.”
Macie wasn’t sure what to say. “Wow, okay. Thanks. That means a lot.”
“Good. I’m glad. I didn’t want that hanging between us. I’ve got to get to class. Talk to you later.”
“Bye.”
Macie stared at her phone like it would answer all the questions in the universe. Mainly why Ford called her. She replayed the conversation. It was nice that he thanked her. She’d worked hard to get the save-the-date cards, the wedding invitations, the shower invitations, the place holders, everything. She was finishing up the final touches on the programs, too. And he was a jerk about the shower invitations, but he okayed the final draft.
Unless...
She wanted to slap herself. Zac told Ford what she’d said. Why would he do that? And should she be pissed or grateful? It wasn't like she told Zac anything in confidence. Why would he even bother? They weren’t friends. She couldn’t not thank him either. She pulled up his number under ‘jackass’ and sent him a quick text.
Thank you. You didn’t have to do that but thank you.
He responded instantly. For what?
Macie shook her head. For telling Ford he was being a jerk.
No problem. He was being a jerk. It’s always my pleasure to point that out to him.
LOL
She slipped her phone in her bag and headed toward the student union for lunch. It was a small victory, but a victory nonetheless. And victories deserved pizza.
With two slices of extra-greasy pepperoni, she settled into a corner booth and opened her tablet. Her Blind Friends app had been silent since they agreed to meet after graduation. She missed Guy. There wasn’t a message from him. Macie hated to admit being a little heartbroken by that, but she hadn’t messaged him either. It took two to play the game.
Dear Guy,
Now that you know, I’m going to keep calling you Guy. I’m not going to lie. This feels awkward now. Like, we’ve taken this huge step forward without actually taking it and I don’t even know what to say. But I have to say something, right? I mean, this is what we do. We talk. We’re honest with each other.
But I also feel like we need to stay anonymous. I want to tell you everything about myself, but I want to do it in person. If I tell you my name, it will break the spell. Does that make sense? I hope so.
My new job wants me to start before graduation. I’m meeting with the HR department to plan out my schedule until I can go full-time. It’s only going to be for a few weeks, but I’ll spend most of my time training, I think. Honestly I don't really know what to expect. This job isn’t what I was going for. It was the only one that offered though, so I had no choice if I wanted to stay here. I need to make the best of it. And I’m terrified and excited at the same time. It’s a lot to take in. I’m stepping blindly into this place. With the exception of us, I never do that. I research, study, prepare. There’s no preparation for adulthood. Not really.
Macie hit send. She’d almost told him about Mark. Almost. It wouldn’t have served any purpose except to show him other men were interested in her. And she couldn’t tell Guy that. It was pointless. She only had virtual eyes for the man on the other side of her screen.
She needed to just set a date to meet him and get it over with. One way or another.
CHAPTER EIGHT
Graduation day. It was both anticipated and dreaded by so many of Zac’s classmates. Zac was indifferent. He had his life laid out for him since he could remember. And it was going to be a good life. One last party after the ceremony and he’d be on his way to wealth and, hopefully, happiness.
Things had gone somewhat back to normal with his mystery girl. They’d exchanged messages as if neither one had agreed to meet. He hadn’t wanted to push and wondered if she felt the same way. But now it was time. Zac sat at his small dining room table and opened his tablet. He reread her last message.
Confession, I’ve never seen the ocean or been to a beach. We didn’t go on vacations when I was a kid. As close as we are to New Orleans, I haven’t even been there. Crazy, right? I think I would like the beach. I’m n
ot someone who can sit still for any length of time, but I imagine long walks along the water would be nice with the tide covering my feet. Who knows, maybe I am the type to just sit on the beach. I’d like to find out. Maybe someday.
I’m moving into my new apartment. It’s perfect for me. It’s also scary. I’ve never lived alone. Maybe I should get that dog just for protection, but if I work insane hours, that’s not really fair to the dog. I need an attack cat.
My new job is interesting. The company I interned for, the one I was waiting for an offer from, never contacted me. I called them, and they said they went in a different direction. Talk about a stab in the heart. I’ll show them they made a mistake.
I’m sorry. I’m rambling again. I’m so uninhibited in my messages to you, sometimes I forget you don’t necessarily need to know everything on my mind. LOL
That little bit of knowledge that she wasn’t leaving, sent his heart into the sky. It was a weird sensation. He’d never felt anything close to it before and now it was with a girl who could have a wart on her nose and practiced magic in her spare time. It didn’t matter if she did or didn’t. He still wanted to meet her, warts and all. A smile crossed his face at the cliché.
Good morning,
Or afternoon, if that’s when you read this. Today’s the day. Graduation. It’s such a long word with even longer implications. I’ve been mulling over what you said. What if we chose the wrong major? What if we’ve accepted a job we hate? What if we’re not supposed to do what we think we’re supposed to do with our lives? What if we’re on the right path? What if everything goes right? I’ve never really considered any of it before.
