by Tess Oliver
Making new friends in Pelican Bay seemed like a tedious and impossible chore. It took years to create the group of friends I’d had in Boston, and I didn’t have the energy or the urge to start the stressful process over again. Mom acted like it was no big deal to start my teenage existence from scratch but she was wrong. Plus I was still seething about my best friend’s betrayal. Although admittedly, the more I thought about Blake, the more I decided Jenny got the raw end of the deal. It made the burn cool a bit, but I wasn’t ready to talk to Jen yet.
Seth, the one face I’d hoped to see, wandered into the eating area. He searched around for someone then sat on the wall and ripped open a bag of chips. I’d found an empty corner in the shade of a big tree. I sat munching my grapes and watching the entire lunch scene.
Seth popped a chip into his mouth then spotted me across the yard. He waved. I waved back and watched as a skinny girl with a punk meets vampire look of solid black hair and heavy make-up sat next to him. The way she nearly sat in his lap made it obvious that she was his girlfriend.
Terrific. Not that it really mattered. The last thing I needed right now was a guy to stress me out. As I finished my yogurt, I felt something tap my back. It happened again, but this time it was followed by loud male laughter. I twisted around. It was Hank holding an open bag of cheese puffs in his hand. Calling me fresh meat and throwing orange snack food at my back was a sure way to warm my heart. His friends waited anxiously for my reaction, so I decided not to have one. I left the table with my crumpled up lunch bag.
“I’d sure like a taste of that tender loin,” Hank sneered continuing with the romantic meat analogies. I walked to the trash and tossed my bag. I totally hated this guy already.
As I crossed the quad I could sense Seth watching me. I peeked over my shoulder at him. The girl had her chin on his shoulder, staring at the side of his face, while she fingered his earring. Like a gothic gecko, she stretched her pierced tongue toward his ear and licked it. He didn’t flinch. Oddly enough, his eyes kept watching me even as the girl nibbled on his neck. I hurried out of the lunch area. At this point, it looked like I was heading toward another solid two, but at least I still had all my toes.
Crouching down to my shitty locker was even tougher with two big books in my hand. I needed my math book for homework. It was wedged at the bottom layer of the stack, so I nearly fell backwards on my butt wrenching it free.
“Take your time, sweetheart. I’m enjoying the whole scene from up here,” Hank said.
Standing abruptly, I kicked the door shut, swaying on my feet for a second from the head rush of standing so quickly. Seth was at his locker too. Of all the lockers in the sea of lockers that ran the length of the hallway, I had to end up with this one.
Hank rested his hand against the metal doors, his arm right next to my head. He leaned closer. His eyes shifted over to Seth’s locker. “Every time I turn around, Freak, you’re standing there.”
Seth looked around at the front of his door and pointed to the number. “Must be a fucking coincidence, or maybe, this is where my locker happens to be.” He glanced at me with those brown eyes then refocused on getting books from his locker. It was amazing how cool he remained with the way this jerk spoke to him.
Hank turned his thick forehead back to me. “I think you would grow to like me if you gave me a chance.”
He leaned closer and I fought the urge to knee him in the groin. “I don’t think so,” I said.
“How do you know?”
“See, I have this funny habit of cataloguing guys in my head, and you went straight to the N page.”
“The N page? Is that for naughty or nice?” he asked trying to sound suave. This guy was so not my type it was laughable.
“No. N for Not in a gazillion years. I prefer my guys to be a little more evolved.” I scooted away from him and decided a dash for the exit would probably be smart. I peeked over at Seth. He was smiling behind his locker door. I grinned in return and trotted down the hallway.
Seth had earned a second page in my mental catalogue. He was my first entry under D for Dangerous smile.
Mom was parked at the back of the school. I threw my backpack in and slid into the front seat. She stared at me with an excited twinkle in her eyes. “How was it?” she finally asked.
I shrugged. “It’s a school. They’re all the same.”
She started the van without another word. Apparently, she’d expected me to come out skipping and whistling a tune of joy.
Mom switched from a news station to some music. “Any cute guys?”
I ripped open the package of the granola bar I had stuffed in the front pocket of my backpack. “One.”
She turned to me. “In that entire school, there is only one cute guy?”
I chewed my bar and nodded. “Yep, just the one. And he has a girlfriend. I figure my future holds either a mental hospital or a monastery.”
Her eyes were back on the road. “I don’t think either will have you.”
And people wondered where I got my dry wit. “Then I guess you’ll be stuck with me.”
“I guess we’ll be stuck with each other.”
I glanced sideways at her profile. I had always been proud of the fact that I had the coolest and the prettiest mom in the neighborhood. I still couldn’t see why Dad had left her. Jenny’s father was still around, and her mom had the figure of a snowman, and she screeched about everything. I know if Mom had just tried a little harder, Dad would have stayed.
We turned up the driveway. A gray mist started to collect out on the horizon behind the ancient house. It was a bit like driving onto the set of a horror movie. “I’ve got macaroni and cheese cooking in the crock pot. It should be ready in a couple of hours.”
The climb to my room was getting easier so my toe must have been healing. I hesitated at my door suddenly remembering the key and the drawer… and the voice. Especially the voice. I stepped in cautiously. I guess I was expecting someone or something to jump out at me, but the place was exactly the way I’d left it. The drawer on the bookcase was shut, and the key was on top.
There was definitely a draft coming through my closed window, so I threw on my hooded sweatshirt and sat down to my computer. Jen’s screen name Pinkalicious popped up with a message.
My fingers plunked hard on the keyboard.
Without warning hot tears gushed down my cheeks.
She was wiping her hands on a dishtowel. “Brazil, what’s the matter? You look upset.”
“Tyler and Raymond are trying to scare me. They keep playing tricks on me. One of them
was hiding in my room just now.”
Mom’s face blanched. “Sweetie, the boys aren’t home yet. They stayed after to play baseball.”
I sat down on the top step and wrapped my arms around my knees. “It’s official. I’m going crazy.” The tears came again.
“Stay down there,” Mom told her pets as she climbed the stairs. She scrunched down next to me and put her arm around my shoulder. “Brazil, it’s hard getting used to a new house and school. But, I promise, it will be fine. I’ve never known anyone as level headed as y
ou, Zilly. You are not going crazy.”
“Mom, there was someone standing in my room. I saw them.”
She stood and offered me a hand up. “Let’s go see.” She opened doors and looked under the bed. I felt like I was five again and she had to prove to me that there was no boogeyman in my room so I’d go to sleep.
A brief inspection of my vacant room only confirmed my suspicions. I was losing it. Mom took hold of my hand. “I think it’s just the stress of moving, Brazil. Why don’t you sleep with me in my room until you stop having these--”
“What? Hallucinations? See, you think I’m crazy too.”
“I don’t think you’re crazy, Zilly. Just stressed. We’ve been through a lot this last year.”
“Fine, I’m stressed.” Having her think I was just imagining things made me feel worse about everything, my sanity, this house, and my new life. “Then you won’t mind if I start drinking wine to take the edge off.”
She smiled. “Wine? That stuff is for wimps. I say you head straight for the whiskey.” She released my hand and turned to leave. I followed close at her heels like I did the night when we’d both stayed up to watch Silence of the Lambs. I did crawl into bed with her that night, but I didn’t think I’d take her up on her invitation this time. Although, I was seriously considering leaving the light on in my bedroom all night.
The rest of the evening was uneventful. Mom had topped the macaroni and cheese with heaps of bread crumbs which was a bonus. The boys rattled on about their new school. From the sound of it, they had been instantly catapulted to their usual rock star status.
Bed sounded inviting and I was tired enough to slip into a dreamless sleep without leaving the light on. Of course, I’m sure I’ve read somewhere that crazy people don’t dream.
Chapter 6
We hadn’t hung any curtains on the upstairs windows yet, and irritating, early morning sunlight crept into my bedroom before the alarm rang. I slid out of bed and walked to my dresser. Even though I’d unpacked and organized my drawers only a few days ago, I couldn’t find a thing in them. As I rifled through my shorts searching for my favorite khaki ones, I could hear the boys race down the hall to the bathroom.
I ran to the door and shouted after them. “You have five minutes!” They slammed shut the door. Great. And Mom was convinced the one bathroom thing would work. I checked my hair in the mirror to see if I could avoid washing it, and the old key caught my eye. I had shut the drawer without looking inside. Now I had the urge to see what it held. A couple of yanks and it opened. I could have sworn I smelled the faint scent of roses as I bent down to look inside.
Tucked at the very back was a stack of yellowed letters. I reached in and pulled them out. They were tied with a black piece of string. The top one was addressed to a girl named Emily living here in Pelican Bay. It was stamped RETURN TO SENDER. Apparently the letter never reached her.
The bathroom door burst open, and I could hear the boys run down the hall to their room. The letters would have to wait or I would be late for another wonderful day at my new school.
My bottom locker gave me a rather interesting perspective of my new schoolmates. There were the oversized, untied skater shoes inhabited by guys who thought they were too awesome to walk like normal people so they shuffled in lose shoes. The Birkenstock and sandal people always had a light, Mother Nature is grand, sort of gait as they carried their binders covered with PETA stickers to class. The heavy, black army boots looked depressed and tortured as they clumped down the gum-covered cement path. I recognized Seth’s running shoes immediately as I balled myself into a cramped, crouched position to find my science book and pencil. But this time there were funky black ankle boots next to him. A flirty giggle rained down on my head.
“Gina, stop doing that. It tickles,” Seth said.
“I know. That’s why I’m doing it,” Gina giggled again.
“You really nailed Hank yesterday.”
I glanced up to see that Seth was talking to me. His girlfriend, who was apparently named Gina, had also shifted her attention to me. She had big hazel eyes that were heavily lined in thick black make-up and a tiny nose with freckles. Anyone who could still be that cute under such heavy mascara and eyeliner would not easily win my approval. I stood.
“He walked out of here with a bright red face,” Seth said. “What’s a gazillion, anyway?
I shrugged. “I think it’s a one with a bazillion zeros after it.”
Seth laughed. Gina wrapped her arms around his and pressed against him.
“This is Gina.”
Gina smiled at me. “I’m his girlfriend.” Of course the tongue in his ear the day before had pretty much already sealed that fact for me.
“A bunch of us are meeting after school at Bill’s Burgers today. We hang out and annoy the management. Why don’t you come with us?”
“Yeah, you should come.” Gina pretended to be enthusiastic about the idea. It was a pathetic attempt.
“I’m not sure. I’ll let you know at the end of the day.” Meeting new people did not fit in to my freshly constructed world of being unsocial and friendless.
“I could give you a ride,” Seth added. Gina smiled weakly at me as they left.
Hank’s giant, square head towered over the flock of students heading my way. It was time to scoot to class. After yesterday’s insult, the boob would either be extra mean to me or even more sleazy after convincing himself that I was playing hard to get.
Julie caught up to me at lunch. Although she’d lived here in Pelican Bay all her life, she didn’t seem to have many friends, but she knew about everyone. She had a habit of constantly smoothing down the stubborn wave in her hair. Her curls were obviously a source of discontent. Today she was overdressed in a straight off the mannequin look with matching purple skirt and t-shirt. She reminded me a little of Christy, chatty and shallow but sweet.
“See that tall girl under the tree over there in the cheerleading uniform.” Julie motioned to our left with her eyes as she peered over her can of orange soda.
I glanced in the direction of the tree. Six cheerleaders were draped around a bench in their spring uniforms. “I see a lot of uniforms.”
“The tallest one with the green headband.”
“Yes, I see her.” I hoped this was going somewhere interesting, but with Julie I had my doubts.
She took a loud sip of her soda before lowering the can. “During our sophomore year, she left the squad and school for nine months before returning with bigger boobs. Rumors had swirled between pregnancy and a boob job. I’m going with the pregnancy story.”
I nodded. “The nine month thing makes that theory your safest bet.”
Julie smiled confidently. That was another trait she shared with Christy, sarcasm flew right over her head.
Seth and Gina weren’t in the quad for lunch. I assumed she’d dragged him into some utility closet to make out. She seemed to be a very hands-on kind of girlfriend. “How long have Seth and Gina been together?” I don’t know why I wanted to torture myself, but I figured Julie would know.
She grabbed my wrist and squeezed it. “Isn’t he the hottest guy ever?” I glanced around to see if anyone had heard the outburst, but apparently, Julie was the type of person people generally ignored.
“He’s definitely cute, but she seems rather attached to him.”
Julie let go of my wrist and rolled her eyes. “Gina does not let him out of her sight.” She stuffed a corn chip into her mouth. “But can you blame her? They’ve been together for a year and a half. She’s a total skank though. I don’t know what he sees in her.” Julie looked past my shoulder. “Speaking of Seth, there’s his mortal enemy, Hank.”
I shrank down hoping to become invisible. “He’s not coming this way, is he?”
“No, he’s headed to the cheer squad table. Why? Do you know him?”
“His locker is right above mine, and I sort of blew him off yesterday.”
Julie lifted her hand for a high-five which
I felt compelled to return. “I wish I’d been there for that. He’s a total jerk. One day he slammed into me in the hallway and sent me flying back on my butt. He walked right by without even a sorry or a hand up.”
“Neanderthals aren’t known for chivalry.”
Julie blinked a couple of times like she was trying to decipher my comment.
“Never mind,” I said.
Chapter 7
Either I was in the mood to punish myself or my willpower to remain an island in my new school was crumbling. It may have even been the excruciatingly dull day at school that led me to the decision. Whatever the reason, I decided to join Seth and his friends at the burger place.
“We can pile into my car,” Seth said, Gina holding tightly onto his hand. Clingy, little thing.
Bill’s Burgers looked like a place surfers would have hung out in the 1950s. A sort of Beach Boys meets the cast of Grease décor. Seth headed straight to an already crowded booth at the back. Two of his friends had Mohawks. Rather unoriginal. Although one guy did have his in pink and black stripes, which gave him a flamingo crossed with zebra look that was pretty tight. A girl with bleached blonde, frizzy hair that looked like it hadn’t seen a bottle of shampoo since Christmas sat between the Mohawk guys.
“This is Brazil. She just moved here from Boston.” Seth waved me into the booth. He followed and his human armband tucked herself in next to him.
“Brazil? Did you make that name up?” the blonde asked. She had a tattoo on her neck, but it was hard to tell exactly what it was supposed to be. It may have been a vine of flowers or the face of a pirate with a rose in his teeth. Hopefully she didn’t shell out too much cash for that ink disaster.
“My mom made it up.”
“Was it a family name?” Seth asked.
“It’s a dull story.” I didn’t feel like going into a discussion about my dad or my name.
“You kids need to order something if you’re going to take up a booth,” a man with a round tummy and Hawaiian shirt, possibly even Bill himself, said as he wiped his hands on a greasy white apron.
