by Lisa Olsen
“Is this all we’re going to work on?” I asked, trying to figure my way out of a particularly tight hold. “I’m sure it’s handy and all, but what are the odds someone will attack me this exact way?”
“No, it’s just a start,” Rob replied at my ear. “There’s plenty more for you to learn, never you fear.”
“Good.” I improvised and instead of trying any of the attacks I’d attempted before, I slammed my hips back and leaned forward throwing us both off balance. Using my body weight, I toppled us to the ground, and we landed in a tangle of limbs on the mat.
“There, I got you to let go without hurting you at all this time,” I crowed with success.
“Only because I didn’t want to break your arm when we fell,” he pointed out, jumping up, light on his feet to offer me a hand up. “I give you full marks for improvising though. It does bring up another point I wanted to go over. You’ve done pretty well so far, but you’ve also neglected to try the one other sure way to break free.”
“What’s that?”
“Bite the bullet and take the pain.”
“What do you mean?” That didn’t sound at all pleasant.
Rob caught me up into a hold again, and I waited to hear what was different this time. “Why can’t you break free?” he asked.
“Because you’re holding me.”
“And am I stronger than you?”
“Um, no, I don’t think so…” I hadn’t tried brute strength to wrench my way out of his holds yet, largely because it hadn’t been the point of the lesson. I wanted to learn how to get out of a hold from someone potentially stronger than me.
“So what’s keeping you there?”
“It hurts when I try to move.”
“But what will happen if you do it anyway? If you give a sharp wrench and pull away all at once.”
“Ah… my arm will break?” That couldn’t be the answer he was looking for, could it?
“Yes, and then?”
“Then I’ll have a broken arm and it’ll hurt like hell! What good is that in a fight?”
“Yes, your arm will likely be broken, but will it kill you?” he asked calmly, and I started to grasp the point.
“Well, no…”
“I don’t recommend it in every situation, especially given the other options we’ve talked about. But it bears mentioning, the time might come when it’s the only option you have left. If you push through the pain, it can set you free.”
“That sounds almost poetic.” I smiled over my shoulder at him.
“Didn’t mean it to be,” he said gruffly. “Now then, show me what you’ve learned. Break free.”
Breaking my own arm didn’t sound like a super lot of fun to me, but I was there to test my limits, right? With a sharp, wrenching motion, I twisted my body as hard as I could, an inarticulate cry escaping my lips as white hot pain lanced up my arm. But instead of the sharp crack of broken bone, I felt him start to give way, and I pushed harder, using my whole body to wrench free of his hold. I stumbled out of his grasp, holding my arm close at first, but the sharp pain went away almost immediately.
Rob’s face was frozen in a mask of shock for long seconds until he found his voice. “What were you doing? I didn’t mean for you to cause yourself that kind of pain.”
“You said to show you what I’ve learned.”
“I only meant it as a talking point. A demonstration that you always have options, even if they’re lousy ones. You were supposed to show me what else you’ve learned today.” His voice softened, strong fingers probing my shoulder and upper arm lightly. “How are you, are you hurt?”
“It’s not that bad.”
“Are you sure? Maybe we should have a doc take a look at you?” His hands probed higher, massaging my shoulder lightly.
“It’s okay, really, but you can keep doing that if you want to,” I sighed, as aches and pains I didn’t realize I had were soothed by his touch. Unfortunately, he let go of me like a hot potato the moment I said I was fine. “I did what you wanted me to though. Or did you let go of me this time because you didn’t want me to get hurt?”
“No, you surprised me too much for that. You broke free on your own.”
I guess that answered the question of which one of us was stronger. “You really weren’t holding back at all?”
“Not about that.”
“Huh?”
“Maybe that’s enough for today.” He shook his head, shoulders rolling as he stepped away from me.
“No, I’m fine, really. I can keep going.” Apart from a slight twinge, it didn’t hurt that much. “Unless you’re tired.” His undershirt was damp with sweat, though I was still cool as a cucumber.
“You’re sure it doesn’t hurt?”
“Want to arm wrestle and find out?” I waggled my eyebrows at him and he shook his head again, this time with a faint smile.
“I think we can skip that for today. We’ve already settled you’re strong enough.”
My insides gave a hop of excitement – the smile more rewarding than busting free of his hold. “Okey doke, what are we working on then? Back to holds?”
“Now that I’ve taught you how to push through the pain, let’s work on reducing your chance for injury. Make like you’re going to hit me.” I clenched my hand dutifully and he clucked his tongue at me with a shake of the head. “That’s the best way to end up with a broken hand. But, if you position your hand like this…” His fingers pushed mine up, leaving the palm open. “Tuck your thumb in a bit… good, that’s it. Don’t want it to get broke.”
“Oh, I’ve seen this in movies before.” Jason Bourne, look out!
“They have the right of it, just like that. Now, when you hit someone, don’t hit them with your hand, hit them with your entire body. Let me show you.” He let go of my hand to stand across from me, but I was too busy looking at the muscles on his shoulders to worry much about being hit. “Look here, you see how my entire upper body pivots when my hand pumps out? And how the weight in my legs shift? You follow through with your entire body. Quick in and back.”
He moved with lightning speed, stopping about six inches from my nose. “The better to be ready for your opponent’s next move, or even better, for your own. Alright? Let me see you try that. Aim for this.” He held up his hand, and I did my best to mimic his stance, feeling awkward and foolish for being so clunky at it.
It was painful to watch the way I lunged at his hand, feeling like the biggest geek imaginable. I’d never thrown a punch in my life. My hand somehow didn’t line up with his and I missed him by a mile, throwing myself off balance in the process.
“Connect with my hand now. Don’t worry, you won’t hurt me.”
Easier said than done. “Hit you like this?” I completed the move at half speed, hitting his hand as slow as a lumbering bear.
“Yeah, just like that, only put some power into it. Your hand is an extension of your arm, see?” He grabbed my forearm and tugged it the rest of the way into the motion so that my hand hit his with a harder smack. Do you feel it up through your arm all the way to your shoulder?”
“I think so,” I replied dubiously, trying it again.
“That’s it. Only go a little harder now, and don’t forget to keep your balance.”
I went through the motions again and again, becoming more comfortable with the movement. What started out as a light smack, gradually became a resounding smack as I practiced, but I still wasn’t even up to half speed. Still, at least I was hitting his hand every time now.
In an effort to impress, I tried it again, pushing for speed as well as accuracy this time, but I miscalculated the amount I had to lean forward and fell completely off balance. I careened into him, my shoulder hitting his chest hard enough to knock the air out of us both, but Rob caught me easily, keeping me from falling to the mat.
“I’ve got you,” he breathed after greedily sucking in a rush of air.
“I guess I need more practice, huh?” I looked up at him with a lo
opy smile, more embarrassed than anything else, but he didn’t show the slightest speck of amusement at my blunder. Instead he stared down at me with an inscrutable expression on his face. If forced to guess, I might say wonder – as if he’d found an alien life form on his doorstep and she’d toppled into his arms.
“You’re perfect.”
“My position here says otherwise, but it’s nice of you to say so,” I smiled wider, more pleased than I could say from the soft words of praise.
Rob’s face clouded, and he set me up on my feet, waiting a few seconds for me to regain my balance before he released me. “That’s enough for today. Keep practicing the motions on your own. We’ll pick up with it again tomorrow night.”
“Wait, that’s it?” I blinked at the sudden dismissal. “But I’m not even tired.”
“Yeah well, I’m knackered,” he replied, bending to scoop up his shoes and shirt. “Time to hit the showers.”
“Oh, right.” How thoughtless of me not to have realized how tough it must be to be used as target practice. “Thanks, Rob,” I called out. “I learned a lot today.”
Rob paused at the top of the stairs, his gaze meeting mine. “You’re welcome, miss,” he said softly. But this time… this time the “miss” didn’t feel so cold. This time, I thought I saw my old Rob looking back at me before he descended the stairs.
Chapter Twenty-One
It was early yet by vampire standards, but a little late for casual visitors when the doorbell rang a few minutes later. Rob was down in the shower and I wasn’t sure where anybody else was, so I called out, “I’ll get it,” and went to the door.
Through the leaded glass I could tell it was someone blonde and feminine, but you could have knocked me over with a feather when I opened the door to see Jenessa standing there. I hadn’t seen her since my brief stay at the Order’s headquarters (a stay I never wanted to repeat), even though she was responsible for saving my life.
I’d never seen her in anything other than a lab coat, but that night she wore a silky blouse and tailored trousers, both in a winter white. Her flaxen hair was pulled up into a chic twist, revealing gray pearls at her ears and throat. Her make-up was soft and demure, the very picture of refined elegance.
I felt like a troll in my pj’s and messy ponytail. Jenessa stood there, a flawless beauty with her intelligent blue eyes and peaches and cream complexion, her smile radiant when I answered the door and did my best to hide behind it.
“Oh, hi Jenessa. I didn’t expect to see you here tonight. What brings you out to my neck of the woods?”
“I came to see you, to see how you’re getting on,” she replied with a warm smile. “I’m sorry I missed your party the other night. I hear it was quite a success.”
“Oh, well that’s nice,” I replied, not quite sure I could take her at her word. Though she wasn’t an official member, she did work closely with the Order. “Would you like to come in for a while?” I asked, remembering my manners.
“That’s very gracious of you, thanks. I’m sorry I stopped by without calling first, but I realized I don’t actually know your phone number,” she said stepping into the entryway.
“Couldn’t you have gotten it from Mason or…” don’t say Bishop… “someone else?”
“I could have, I suppose, but that might have invited all manner of questions.” Her smile dimmed, and now I knew there was something to her visit beyond a casual desire to drop by.
“Come on in and have a seat.” I waved her into the front parlor, taking a seat on one end of the sofa. “Would you like something to drink? I think we have just about everything known to man after the party.”
“No, thanks, I’m fine,” she replied, smoothing out nonexistent wrinkles in her pants before she looked up at me again. “How are you feeling? Any trouble since we last spoke?”
“No, no symptoms at all. Of course I’ve been sticking to the live stuff instead of the bagged blood, and I find it helps not to have someone trying to kill me,” I quipped, wondering if she’d pull out a stethoscope next. Or had Doc Winter called her from England? Had he shared his theories on my heritage after I’d compelled him to forget it? “Is there some reason I should be having any trouble?” I asked, more than a little anxiety creeping into my voice.
“No, no, of course not,” she replied hurriedly. “I’m sorry, that wasn’t my main reason for coming at all.”
“It’s not?”
“I hear things, and you struck me as a fairly straightforward person, so I wanted to be open with you.”
That didn’t sound so good. “Open about what?”
“As I said, there’s talk. I’ve heard rumblings around the HQ because there are those in the Order who’re concerned what you might do with your new position as Jarl.”
Being talked about by the Order – why did that make my lips numb just thinking about it? “What do they think I’m going to do?”
“It’s said you’re actively campaigning to have the Order’s powers stripped.”
“Whoa, I wouldn’t put it that way,” I leapt up to defend myself. “Sure, I’ve spoken out about revamping the laws to revisit what does and doesn’t work these days. I don’t think of it as stripping the Order’s powers so much as changing their focus back to the original intent. But I’m not anti-Order, some of my good friends are in the Order. I sort of hoped we’d be the same.”
“I’d like that too,” she smiled before dropping her gaze as well as her voice. “It’s also said you’re sympathetic to those who would try to circumvent the law.”
What was she up to? “No offense, Jenessa, but as much as I’d love to be your friend, you are with the Order. Wouldn’t it sort of be suicide for me to admit anything like that to you?”
“Oh, I’m not looking for you to admit to anything, more the opposite.”
I wasn’t getting it, and I waited for her to continue.
“I thought maybe I could help.”
“You want to help me speak out against the laws?”
“No, I meant something more practical than that. I thought, that is… I’m in a unique position where I might be of some service to you.”
I stared at her like she had chipmunks crawling out of her ears. “You want to help me,” I said carefully, not wanting to put any words in her mouth.
“I thought maybe, I might be able to help you forge you know what for those who need it.”
Wow, and I thought I was hesitant to jump in. “That’s really sweet of you to offer, Jenessa, but I’m pretty sure you can’t do it if you can’t say it out loud.”
“I’m sorry, it’s just… this is the first time I’ve ever done anything like this. I haven’t got your nerve,” she replied with a self-deprecating laugh.
“Who says I’m looking for forged documents?” Everything about her made me want to trust her, but then again, that might be why the Order had sent her to entrap me.
“I don’t only hear things at HQ,” she admitted. “I heard, in a roundabout way, that you recently helped two men who were targeted for elimination by the Order over a matter of licensing.”
“Who did you hear that from?” I’d been extremely vague in what I’d told Leander when I’d sought his help in trying to find a forger, but I had no idea who he’d talked to.
“I’m sorry, I promised not to speak of him directly.”
“Then, I’m sorry, I don’t think I can have this conversation with you.” No matter what trusty vibes I got off of her, it was far too dangerous to admit to, and I rose to my feet, ready to show her the door.
“I have proof you can trust me.”
This oughta be good. “Okay, go ahead and prove it then.”
“I know the truth about your identity and I’ve never said a word.”
“What?” I’m not sure I even made a sound, I was so taken aback.
“I’ve known it for weeks. Ever since I…”
“Let’s go for a walk.” I pulled her off the couch by the elbow, cutting her off. She had to have
figured it out from all the blood work, the same as Winter. I had to suss out what she really knew and how much she only thought she knew, but I couldn’t do it in the house. There were too many prying ears.
“Alright,” she replied, puzzled, but going with it. “Do you need to change first?”
“Eh, my pride’s already shot for the day, why bother with it now?” I waved it away, but pulled on a long cableknit sweater from the coat closet in case I ran into one of my neighbors. It was easier not to have to explain my bare shoulders in the middle of winter. I took her around the side of the house to the rose garden. It was less overgrown now, thanks to Gunnar’s efforts, but still too choked with weeds to be considered impressive. I chose it because I could see anyone coming from either the house or the front or back gates.
“Why did you want to come out here?” Jenessa asked, once we reached the wrought iron benches, the paint flaking, but still sound.
“Because I never quite know who might be listening around here, and you’re talking about things that I’d rather keep quiet.”
“That’s sad in your own home, isn’t it?” Her face clouded with sympathy, but I shrugged it away.
“That’s the price I pay for becoming a public figure, I guess.” There wasn’t much I could do about it on the path I’d chosen. “So… about my identity.”
“You needn’t worry, I’ll keep your secret. As I said, I’ve known for some time now.”
“Just so we’re on the same page, what is it you think you know?”
“I know you’re not the age you claim to be. There’s no way the lineage on your chip can explain the antibodies in your blood.”
I had to start being more careful who I gave access to my blood. “How old do you think I am?” I asked out of curiosity.
“It’s hard to pinpoint it, but I’m thinking you couldn’t have been turned more than fifty years ago, tops.”
“Try a couple of months ago,” I snorted, amused when her eyes flew wide.
