The soft linen was fragrant beneath her cheek, the bed plush and comfortable. This was not the Flea Bag Inn ala Laredo or general holding in the county lock up. The muscled arm weighing heavy across her waist didn’t belong to Big Alice—yes, while there hadn’t been a Bertha, Alice had been all too real—a 6-foot tall, tattooed behemoth of a woman who had eyed her contemptuously for the six interminable hours she’d been behind bars. And the warm, lightly haired chest pressing into her back along with the stiff erection that prodded her thigh, surely didn’t belong to any of the other scarier than hell women housed along with her in the Laredo jail. Thank god.
The obviously aroused, very male body behind her stirred, stretching long and slow like a cat. She wished she’d been facing him, to see him before he awakened, something she had enjoyed, but had rarely gotten to do while they were together. When she had, what a glorious sight it had been. In his last minutes of sleep, she’d soak in every detail of his masculine beauty until upon waking, his blue eyes would open, instantly alert and acutely aware, without the least residual of sleep. A leftover instinct from his Green Beret days she was certain. She’d missed sleeping and waking beside him.
As he moved closer, pressing fully against her back, his scent surrounded her, familiar and soothing with subtle hints of citrus and cypress. Turning her head slightly, she inhaled. He was using the Twilight Woods body wash she’d bought for him when they were together. One day, he’d commented positively on the scented candle she had burning. When she returned to the out of the way store where she’d purchased it, she’d been pleased to find a line of body wash and soaps for men in the same scent. She’d scooped it up, loving how it smelled on him. It became a staple in their shower stall.
That he continued to use it, having to make a special trip to buy it, spoke volumes. As did her burning the same scented candle in her apartment every night. Self-imposed torture, yes, it also comforted her, making her feel he was a part of her life. She closed her eyes as a wave of emotions swept through her, bittersweet as they were.
“You’re awake, Mara. We need to talk.” Sean’s tone, husky from sleep, stirred her like no other.
“Where are we?”
“A safe house in Galveston.”
His words took a moment to penetrate. Putting her lust aside, she allowed the reality of her situation to creep into her consciousness. She was still on the run, not from the law, but Victor and his thugs who could have only one goal when it came to the key witness who could single handedly take them all down, shutting her up permanently.
While they’d sped away from the Laredo jailhouse shortly after dark, he’d mentioned taking her somewhere safe, but she’d been so on edge, she supposed it didn’t sink in, like so much in the past few days. Taking in the slate blue walls with white trim, the white furniture and the cloudlike bed beneath her, it was impossible to believe this was the FBI’s doing.
“The FBI set this up?”
He huffed a low laugh. “Hardly. If they had, the mattress would be lumpy, the paper on the walls peeling, and the Gulf of Mexico sure wouldn’t be outside our bedroom window. This is a safe house Rossi style. We’ll stay here, keeping under the radar until the guys have time to beef up security enough for us to go home.”
“So are there agents outside or something?”
“No.”
“Then who…”
His hand lifted from her waist and caught her chin, turning her face up to his as he rose on an elbow. “You’re looking at him.”
“But—”
“I’m your handler for this op, Mara. That means I’ll die to keep you safe. It also means you follow my orders without question. Is that clear?”
His air of authority made her feel safe and roused her simultaneously. She answered back in a breathless whisper. “As crystal, Sir.”
Sean shifted, rolling her to her back as his eyes flashed. He settled on top of her, his lips coming down fiercely. This was no slow warm up, instead his kiss seared at once with intensity. His mouth opened wide over hers, his tongue invading and taking possession. It was exactly as she remembered, the memory of it had sustained her, filled her dreams and fueled her fantasies every day since she’d left. She gave herself to him, freely, eagerly and without reservation. They were both panting when he lifted his head long minutes later.
“Before we go further, there’s an important point to discuss. One of many, but this one takes priority.”
Somewhat dazed and more than a little disappointed, she blinked up at him. Distracted, she stared at his mouth. He was saying something, but she was preoccupied with his lips, full and wet, glistening with the proof of their shared passion.
“Mara, focus.”
Trying with difficulty to pay attention, she breathed deep but his scent enveloped her and made her efforts ineffective.
“Mara, did you hear me?”
“Yes, priorities,” was her breathy reply.
He cleared his throat, shifting beneath her, the hard length of him against her thigh told her he wasn’t entirely focused on the point of discussion either.
“I said you’re with me now and in the future. We’re married and I’ve decided we’re staying that way.”
That got her full attention. “But the divorce papers—”
“—Are in the shredder in my office.”
“So you’ve made this decision.”
“You got a problem with that?”
Secretly she rejoiced. After all she’d done, and all they’d been through, she hadn’t imagined a reconciliation was possible. With her history, she was skeptical, cynical even. She pushed back, testing his resolve.
“That’s not how things work in the real world, Sean.”
“How’s the real world been working out for you this past year, Mara?”
She grimaced. “Obviously, not great.”
“Exactly. This will be a fresh start for us, a clean slate, but things are going to be different this time around. I’m taking full control. We’re not going to be weekend players anymore, I want it 24/7.”
Stunned, her jaw dropped. “You want a slave?” Never had they gone so deep in the lifestyle.
“No. I’m not going to demand you greet me at the door naked and on your knees, or that you lick my boots. What I’m talking about is full-time D/s in our daily lives not only at the club. I’m in charge, no questions asked. There will be rules. If you break the rules, there will be punishment.”
Warmth and hope rushed through, as well as fear that this was all an elusive dream that would vanish upon waking. She stared up at her take-charge husband. Lord, how she’d missed him. Her nerves were on edge from the emotional roller coaster ride she’d been on. Unwittingly, the imp inside her surfaced.
She pushed up on an elbow, deliberately looking around the room. Leaning on a hip, she peered over the side of the bed.
“What are you looking for?”
She peeked at him over her shoulder. “Your club. You sound like a Neanderthal, but this doesn’t look like a cave.”
With notable speed, his hand came down sharply on her backside.
“Ow!”
Her hand flew back to rub away the sting, but Sean caught her wrist. Rolling her to her back, he came over her, his body pressing her into the mattress. Blue fire blazed down at her.
“Settle, Mara. Now is not the time for sass. I’m serious.”
He knew her so well.
She nodded, trying to turn away, but his hand captured her chin, compelling her to meet his eyes.
“I have no choice?”
“None.”
Again, her heart filled with joy, but the pain of her past, particularly the last year, leaving him and living without him, couldn’t be discounted. All the “better to have loved and lost bullshit” was exactly that. She couldn’t go through losing him again; it would destroy her.
Torn between protecting her ravaged heart and surrendering fully to him, she asked, “What if I don’t agree?”
“D
o you love me?”
She stiffened. “What?”
“You heard me. In Cap’s office that day, you said you left me because you loved me. Have those feelings changed?”
She closed her eyes, her brow creasing. She’d said a lot in Cap’s office, none of which had been meant for Sean’s ears.
“Open your eyes and look at me, Mara.”
Her lashes lifted.
“I asked if your feelings have changed. I want an answer.”
Her tongue seemed almost paralyzed, the emotions so powerful, she was near to choking. Unable to make a verbal reply, she shook her head.
“Neither have mine. I think about you constantly. My body craves yours like a man lost in the desert craves water. I hunger for your touch, yearn to see you smile and hear your laughter, all of which have been absent from my life for far too long. I want you back, Mara, and this time, I’ll do what it takes to keep you.”
“How can you want me after all I’ve done?”
“Because I love you.”
Hearing the words at last, tears blurred her vision. His thumb swept over her cheek, a familiar gesture from a better time. Needing that gentle touch, she turned her face into the caress.
“I understand how difficult this has been. I also understand fear, coercion and strong-arm tactics, but if you trusted me, you would have come to me for help. I would have been your first and only response to his threats. Instead, you lied to me and ran from us. That’s what I can’t forget.”
“Or forgive?”
He paused, then laid more truth upon her. “I can forgive what Victor made you do. Check that, forgive isn’t the right word. You were blameless, a child being abused and manipulated by a son of a bitch who held unlimited power. I can’t fault you for his crimes. What I can’t forget are the secrets, hiding your past, no matter how awful was wrong, and you lied to me. Repeatedly. Not little fibs, either. These were purposeful deceptions and major betrayals. You covered up crimes, including extortion of a state judge. If charged, you could be found guilty of collusion, not to mention attempted murder. If you’d trusted me enough to come to me in the beginning, you wouldn’t be in this mess.”
“I couldn’t, Sean, I was too afraid for you to know.”
“Did you think I’d leave you?”
“Yes, and I couldn’t bear to see the revulsion in your eyes when you heard. Like that day in Cap’s office.” Remembering how he’d look at her, with fury and what she’d feared the most, disgust, made tears flood her eyes, burning like acid. No matter how hard she fought to keep them at bay, one slipped between her lashes and rolled down her temple.
He kissed it away. “I didn’t understand what you’d been through, what that bastard—” He paused as his voice broke. “If I could, I would take back all the hurtful things I said.”
“As would I.” Bravely, she met his pain-filled gaze. “I was a coward for running.” She faltered a moment, whispering, “I’m always running it seems.” Inhaling deeply, she shifted back, boldly giving him the truth. “I was stupid for trusting him like I did, I knew better. It was clear he wouldn’t ever let me go, only push for more and more. I foolishly thought knowing the truth would hurt you more than my leaving. I’m so sorry, Lucky.”
She focused on his demands. She’d been his sub before and despite him thinking they were weekend players, his authority had bleed over into their daily lives. She never had a problem with that, because—if she was honest with herself— he wasn’t ever unfair and was never reactionary, and always, even if it had to wait until the next day, the price was worth the reward. Now, the reward was even greater because she’d be in his arms again. Miserable without him for so long, with all of her secrets laid bare, there was no reason to fight it any more. She had a chance to be with him again, to begin anew. How could she possibly say no?
“I’m ready to start over, Sean, under your terms. You’ll be relieved to know that I’m an open book and have nothing left to hide.”
“Good. I don’t think my heart can take any more of your kind of surprises.” He cupped her jaw and angled her face so she had no choice but to meet his eyes directly. “Moving forward, we’ll have full disclosure, Mara. No more secrets or lies, whatever the reason, no matter how altruistic. I don’t care if the president comes to you and tells you it’s a matter of national security, as my woman, you will tell me. Do you understand?”
“I understand.”
“Effective now, I’m in charge. I make and enforce the rules; your job is to obey me. To make sure we’re on the same page, I’ll rework our contract.”
“I’ll sign it,” she cut in eagerly.
His hand caught her jaw. “This is not going to be a warm and fuzzy play contract like before, Mara. I’m going to hold your feet to the fire. I’m never going through the agony of this past year ever again. Got it?”
“I won’t let you down. I promise. I’m going to prove that I can be trusted. I’ll follow whatever rules you decide and do my best to be the most compliant wife and submissive possible. I’ll even tone back on the sass.”
As he searched her face at length, she returned his gaze unwaveringly having meant every word. Surprisingly, he grinned, the seriousness lifting from his face.
“Baby, don’t make a vow you can’t keep. Mara O’Brien without sass is like pizza without cheese, a library without books, worse; it’s like sex without an orgasm.”
“A fate worse than death,” she muttered under her breath, then when she realized what she’d said, slapped her hand over her mouth.
“See, my sassy girl, you didn’t last five seconds.” His fingers slid into her hair threading their way through the silky strands until he cupped the back of her head, anchoring her in place. “What we had before was good, amazing in fact. I don’t want to change that. What I want is open, honest communication. What I will have between us is absolute transparency. No more secrets and lies, Mara. I won’t have it.”
“I’ve learned my lesson over this past year, and will do whatever it takes to fix this because being apart from you is not an option.”
“Damn straight.” He lowered his head and lightly touched his lips to hers. “I want you, Mara.”
“I want you too, Lucky. Now, please.”
With a need that robbed her of breath, his mouth took possession of her. As he did, she spread her thighs welcoming him home. Without preliminaries, he drove inside. Having his naked body against her had made her very wet and extremely aroused, but the breadth of him stretched her long neglected channel to the point of discomfort. She clung to him, welcoming the bite of pain, making it real, not fantasy, tangible after so long, not simply another dream.
Keenly aware of every nuance of her response, he keyed in on the problem. Slowing his movements, he slipped his hand between them, his thumb finding her clit. He circled and rubbed across the nub, the stimulation flooding her already wet pussy to overflowing, allowing him to sink deep.
“Better?” he murmured against her lips.
She wrapped her legs around his waist, taking more of him yet and sighed, “The best.”
Unhurriedly, he reclaimed her, slowly withdrawing before gliding back the same way. He repeated the deliberate motion again and again, until a guttural groan rolled from his chest. “Fuck, Mara. Nothing feels as good as you.”
Mara’s hands rose to his chest, her fingers digging into his pecs, as if she could literally touch the heart that beat so strongly beneath flesh and bone. Love for him swelled in her chest, filling it near to bursting. She gazed up at him, willing him to see.
With his eyes locked on hers, he gradually increased the pace. His hands moved beneath her knees, pushing them toward her chest, spreading her wider. With the new angle, she exhaled with a soft grunt each time his cock tunneled deep. As she felt her climax build, her head arched back and she moaned out her passion.
“Keep your eyes on me, baby. I want to see that gorgeous green as you come.”
Lowering her chin, her green gaze met th
e purest blue she’d ever seen. She got lost in them as his body propelled her toward her peak. Pumping into her fiercely, Sean moved her beyond it. As her body thrummed with pleasure, the depths of which only he had given her, he slammed into her once more and shouted his own primal release.
Then she did something she only ever did around Sean. Not at five when her grandmother had died and left her to her mother’s neglect, or beneath Victor’s punishing fists, or the countless other painful, humiliating moments in her past did she break. It was only this man; her love for him and the deep emotions he stirred within her that could bring her to her knees. So she cried. Not pretty feminine tears, either. No. Mara didn’t simper and sniff daintily, she bawled, big stuttering snuffles that spiraled rapidly into harsh, ugly, body rocking sobs of pain, regret and relief.
“Mara…” he soothed, rolling with her until she lay on top. “Don’t, baby. We’ll get through this.”
She nodded, weeping into his chest. Through her tears she managed to get out, between sniffles and hitching breaths, “I sc-screwed up b-b-bad, Lucky, but I plan to m-make it up to you. I won’t betray you ever again.”
Chapter Twenty-two
With her hand in his, he towed her along, his strides double to hers as they quickly covered the ground between his SUV and the entrance. Amazed at the number of cars in the lot at this early hour, Mara scurried to keep up. But seriously, it was too early to go shopping.
“What do we need at Walmart at half past the ass crack of dawn, warden?”
“It’s 8 a.m., Mara. Hardly the ass crack of anything.” He didn’t turn back to address her, his head moving from side to side as he scanned their surroundings constantly. For threats, she knew, beginning to search as well, except it wasn’t easy to focus when every stride jarred her leg painfully.
At a near run, it was becoming a struggle. “Sean, please. My leg—”
He stopped and she tried to put on the brakes, but her agility wasn’t what it was and she slammed into him. His arm caught her around the waist, lifting her against his hip until her feet dangled an inch or so off the ground. He bent his head to explain.
Second Time Lucky (Club Decadence Book 5) Page 25
