She returned to sit beside Cora and took her hand. “He would make a fine husband for you.”
Cora jerked her hand away. “I’d rather be a spinster.”
Mother stood, her back rigid. “I’m sorry you feel that way. I imagine you will change your mind once you think about it.” She stepped toward the doorway and smiled. “After all, there aren’t many fine gentlemen here, are there? Your father agrees with me that a union with Mr. Reid would be the best thing for you.”
“Father?” Cora’s heart became a leaden ball. “Father wants me to marry an old man?”
Mother drew herself up. “Mr. Reid is not old.”
“He’s almost as old as Father.”
Mother waved her argument aside. “Your father is forty-three. Mr. Reid is only thirty-two. Age is irrelevant, Cora. He may be a few years older than you, but many women marry older men and have wonderful marriages.”
Cora sank to the bed with her head bowed. “I don’t even know him.”
“Now, Cora, we’ve visited with Mr. Reid on several occasions.” Mother sounded as if the matter was settled. “He would like to call on you after your father returns. He wants you to be thinking of a date for the ceremony. June would be good. If you’ll give serious consideration, you will realize what a fortunate young lady you are.”
Mother turned a tender smile on Cora. “I’ll be so glad for you to live nearby. I love you very much.” She placed a hand on her growing abdomen while a shadow crossed her face. “I can’t bear the thought of losing any more of my children.”
Fear and anger warred with guilt as Cora watched her mother go carefully down the ladder. She should never have climbed up to the loft in her condition, but she’d obviously done so out of love. An interfering, possessive love to be sure. Nevertheless, Cora knew her mother loved her.
Cora fell across her bed and moaned. What would she do now? She didn’t want to hurt her mother, but she refused to marry Mr. Reid. Anger rose inside her chest. George shouldn’t have put her in this position in the first place. She fought the tears that burned her eyes.
Chapter 14
Cora curled up on her bed, letting her thoughts run rampant. What was this foolish obsession of Mother’s that she should marry Mr. Reid? She would have to get over it, because Cora would never marry the man. A rustle behind her alerted her that someone had come into her room.
Gentle strokes on her back told her Eliza was there. “I’m so sorry, Cora. Did I cause this to happen?”
“Of course not.” Cora turned and flung herself into her sister’s open arms. Tears filled her eyes and ran down her cheeks. “Oh, Eliza, she says I have to marry that awful, old Mr. Reid.”
“I know. I heard that much. What are you going to do?” Eliza stroked Cora’s back in a comforting, circular motion.
“I don’t know.” She brushed at the tears on her cheeks. “Do I have a choice?” Her voice became mocking. “He says I can pick the day in June for my wedding. All right. I pick the thirtieth. Maybe I’ll die before then.”
“Don’t, Cora. Please, don’t say that.” Eliza wiped at her own tears. “Why don’t you get Aaron to marry you?”
Cora laughed a short, bitter laugh. “As if Mother would let me.”
Sweet, gentle Aaron. His face filled her thoughts, his blue eyes kind and his smile causing her heart to trip. Oh, yes, if she had to marry someone in this wilderness, why couldn’t it be Aaron. As quickly as the thought filled her mind, guilt drove it away.
“Why would you say such a thing, anyway? George will come, I know he will.” She frowned at Eliza.
Eliza sighed. “I suppose. He still could before then, couldn’t he?”
At Eliza’s words, a faint hope stirred. Ben would be back in May with news of George. Maybe George would come with Ben and Father. Then it wouldn’t matter what Mother said. She and George could still marry or elope if they had to. In the meantime, she’d let Mother think she was reconciled to marrying Mr. Reid.
Cora’s new resolve gave her an outward calm, while anger and rebellion burned below the surface. Only to Eliza did she speak of her aching heart. Only to herself would she entertain the heart-felt longing for something beyond her reach. Something that even George might not be able to satisfy.
~*~
One day near the end of March, Cora helped her sister haul a large basket of dirty clothes to the creek where their mother waited for them to help with the laundry. Halfway there, Eliza stumbled. She dropped the basket handle and grabbed her foot.
“This is so primitive.” Eliza hopped a couple of steps, her long light brown braids flying out behind her. “Laundry day was never like this until we moved here.”
Cora let her end of the basket go. “No, Mrs. Brooks did all the work. All we had to do was throw our dirty things down the laundry chute.”
“I wonder how Mr. Reid does his washing.” Eliza bent to pick up the basket handle and looked at Cora from under her eyelashes.
Cora’s nostrils flared. “I don’t care how Mr. Reid does his laundry or anything else. Furthermore, I don’t ever intend to find out.” Sudden tears sprang to her eyes. “Oh, Eliza, what will I do if George doesn’t come in time?”
Eliza straightened and turned toward the creek. Mother bent to poke a stick into the fire under the large boiling pot.
Compassion shone in Eliza’s eyes as she turned back to Cora. “There’s really nothing you can do, is there?”
Cora crossed her arms. “No, and I hate them for it, but I hate Father most of all.”
“Why?” Eliza frowned. “What did he do?”
“When he left, he promised we’d have a long talk on his return. Why didn’t he just tell me then? Was he afraid I’d say no?” Cora laughed a short, bitter sound. “I did say no and look where that got me. Father’s a coward. He knew how I’d feel, so he left Mother to smooth it all over before he got home.”
Eliza shook her head as if she didn’t believe the truth.
Cora huffed. “Why don’t they auction me off like they do the slaves? Oh, I forgot! There’s only one wealthy, old man in this god-forsaken place, so they can’t. They’ll just sell me straight out. I wonder how much they’ll get for me?”
Eliza’s face twisted as if she might cry at any moment. “Oh, Cora, you know that’s not true.”
“Oh, do I?” Cora’s laugh sounded strange to her own ears. “Why else would a mother and father do this to their own daughter? They didn’t give me a choice, Eliza.”
“I don’t know about Father, but Mother thinks Mr. Reid’s a wonderful man because he’s from Boston.” Eliza glanced at Mother. “We need to move before she notices us.”
Cora picked up her end of the basket and walked with Eliza.
As they drew near their mother, Eliza leaned closer and whispered. “Mother is throwing a fit about Vickie and John leaving, and I don’t think it has anything to do with the baby. I think she’s trying to keep you from marrying George so you won’t go away too. She doesn’t want any of us to leave her. I think she’s scared.”
Cora walked the last few feet to Mother and dropped the heavy basket. So Mother was trying to keep her from marrying George, was she? Well, it wouldn’t work. That was exactly what she would do just as soon as he came. Why should she care what Mother wanted? George might not be the kindest man in the world, or the most handsome, but he was better than anyone in this wilderness.
The image of Aaron Stark slipped unbidden into her mind. His dark, brooding gaze filled her memory until she couldn’t remember what George looked like.
“Cora, we don’t have time for daydreaming.” Mother’s voice cut into her musings. “Can you help Eliza put those clothes in the cold water to soak?”
As Cora pushed articles of clothing under the water with a short, smooth stick, Eliza pulled a pair of John’s heavy denim pants and spread them across the oak log Father had split in half for a battling bench. The rough, flat surface was about twelve inches across and four feet long. Father had notched the e
nds of three pine poles, thirty-two inches long, and nailed them, one on each corner, to the bench for legs.
Eliza beat the pants with a short pine paddle, turning them over and over as she worked. Battling was one job Cora hated. Still, as she watched Eliza smack the bench again and again, the band around her heart tightened. She stepped forward and held out her hand. “Let me do that, Eliza.”
Eliza stopped mid-stroke, her eyebrows lifted. “You want to battle?”
“Yes.” She would burst if she couldn’t hit something. With Mother looking on, battling was her only choice. She took the paddle from Eliza’s hand and smiled at the confusion on her sister’s face.
Smack! That was George for not coming when he said he would. She slammed the paddle down again. That one was for old men who wanted young girls. Another smack. Mothers should never force their daughter to marry against their will. Smack! Fathers should be honest with their daughters. She lifted the paddle again.
“Cora, we don’t want a hole in John’s pants.” Mother pulled the pants away and dipped them in the boiling, soapy water. “Please, try not to hit so hard. Besides ruining our clothing, you’ll wear out your arm.”
Eliza laid a sopping wet shirt on the bench. She leaned close and whispered. “Are you feeling better?”
Cora laughed and nodded. Nothing escaped Eliza’s notice. She did feel better. Still smiling, she lifted the paddle again.
~*~
As March blew itself out, Ralph Stark surprised Cora by visiting Eliza. He didn’t stay long, only through the evening meal. Eliza walked outside with him when he left. When she returned to the house, a smile sat on her lips and sparkles filled her eyes.
April brought a strange mixture of sunshine and showers. Early in the month, on a sunshiny day, Esther and Rebekah came to visit with a large bouquet of colorful wildflowers, which Esther presented to Mother. “These were growing by the wayside. I couldn’t resist picking them for your table.”
“Why, thank you, Esther. They’re lovely.” Mother took the yellow and purple flowers and went in search of a container to put them in.
Cora welcomed her friend. “I’m so glad you came. Ben will wish he’d been here.”
Esther was always beautiful, but today she glowed. Her large blue eyes sparkled from an inner happiness that Cora envied. Esther’s love for Ben showed every time his name was mentioned, and her expression brightened.
At one time Cora thought she was in love with George. Now she wondered. In less than a year, so much had happened. So many changes. Had she changed as well? Had he? If George came, would they still feel the same as before? For a fleeting moment, she brought Mr. Reid to mind. Although she refused to acknowledge her betrothal to the man, the fact hung over her head as a dark cloud. No matter how much she and George had changed, she needed him. If she didn’t go with him, she’d be forced to become the wife of an old man she would soon detest.
It’d been so long since George promised. Maybe he’d changed his mind. Her breath came in quick gasps. She couldn’t do it. She couldn’t stand by that old man and take vows binding her to him for life. She’d rather die first. Mr. Reid repulsed her. If she married him, her life would be a living death. How much nicer it would be to lie in Aaron’s beautiful valley for eternity. At least there she’d have peace.
Cora shoved the morbid thoughts from her mind and helped set the table.
As they ate lunch, she almost choked on her soup when Mother spoke to Esther. “Cora has been doing some beautiful embroidery work on things for her hope chest. We’ve all been sewing every chance we get—there’s so little time for all that needs to be done—but Cora’s work is the finest. I’m sure she’d love to show you what she’s been doing.”
Esther’s eyebrows arched in question as she searched Cora’s face. “Of course, I’d be honored to see.”
Cora frowned as her mother stood and began clearing the table. She’d been working on things for George and her—not Mr. Reid. She sighed and shoved her chair back. “I think most of it’s upstairs.”
In her room, Cora pulled out a pair of pillowcases she’d been working on.
Esther spoke in a low voice. “I didn’t know your mother knew about you and the boy from your old home. I’m surprised. She seemed happy about it.”
Esther sat on the bed, her hands folded in her lap. Her long, wheat-colored hair was braided and wrapped around her head like a halo. Her large baby-blue eyes questioned.
She was pure and innocent. How could she understand the turmoil stirring in Cora’s soul? Esther wouldn’t understand the rebellious thoughts eating away at her mind like a cancer. This was something they couldn’t share.
Cora handed the pillowcases to Esther. “Mother wasn’t talking about George. My parents have decided it’s time I marry. Mr. Reid has asked for my hand, and Father said yes. I agreed to the thirtieth of June if Father is back in time.”
Esther eyes widened. “But I thought you were so sure. Isn’t Mr. Reid . . .?”
“What? Old? Yes, he’s thirty-two.” Cora didn’t want to even think of Mr. Reid. She certainly didn’t want to talk about him. She grabbed a dresser scarf and shoved it at Esther. “This was Mother’s. It was plain when she gave it to me.”
Pink roses bloomed on either end with a vine and leaves growing along the edges. Esther touched one of the roses. “You do wonderful work, Cora. The roses look alive.”
“Thank you. I enjoy sewing.” Cora stood and took her cream-colored dress from its hook. Three scalloped tiers formed the long skirt. “Mother has insisted I go through all my clothes. Most of them were too short.” She held the dress up to her. “Since Mother didn’t tell Father to bring fabric from St. Louis for a wedding dress, I’ll have to make do with my party dress from last year.”
She giggled. “I have a red dress. George insisted I get it once for a party, and I only wore it that one time. Mother never approved, even though it’s very dark red, almost black. It has a low neckline with white lace trim. Maybe I should get it out and make it over for my wedding.”
Esther frowned. “You wouldn’t really, would you? I mean a wedding . . .”
Cora shrugged. “If I have my way, there won’t be a wedding to Mr. Reid. I’d do anything to keep from marrying him.”
“I’m so sorry.” Esther’s eyes glistened.
Cora hung her dress back up. Esther could sympathize all she wanted, but it wouldn’t do any good. Nothing would. Only George could rescue her, and she didn’t know if she could count on him. She turned to the door. “It’s stuffy in here. Wouldn’t you like to go outside?”
Esther stood. “Actually, I need to find Rebekah and start back home. Ma said we could come since the early garden is all planted, but there’s always plenty to keep us busy. I hate to leave it for Ma to do. She has enough without doing our work too.”
Cora watched the Newkirk wagon roll out of sight. Eliza went into the house while Cora walked around back. The outhouse would give her the privacy she needed for a good cry. Esther’s happiness and love for Ben made her own misery more pronounced. June would be here too soon. Somehow, she had to escape. Tears blinded her as she stepped into the tiny, wooden outbuilding. Never had she felt so without hope.
~*~
“They’re here. Ben and Father’s back.” Lenny’s yell from outside sent Cora hurrying to the door. He ran toward the house with both arms waving and Nicholas trailing far behind. “Father and Ben’s coming! Me and Nick saw ’em.”
Mother shoved past. “Oh, thank the Lord.”
“Come on, Cora, let’s go meet Father.” Vickie, careful in her condition, pushed back from the table where she and Cora had been making bread. “We can finish this later.”
Cora hesitated while resentment from the past six weeks held her prisoner. She longed to run into her father’s arms, yet bitterness and hurt warred with love and the longing to hear Father say he’d never given her away to a man she scarcely knew. Surely, he wouldn’t do such a thing. Only he had. Mother couldn’t h
ave made up such a story. She would have no reason to.
Vickie waited with her hand on the small of her back. She looked large and clumsy. Maybe Ben had word from George. Cora hurried outside and matched her steps to her sister’s slower ones.
The two wagons were little more than recognizable as they followed the creek from the east. Oh, Ben, please have good news for me. Cora picked up her pace.
“Cora, if you’re going to stay with me, you’ll have to slow down.” Vickie caught Cora’s hand and laughed. Her other hand rested on her bulging stomach. “We’re having trouble keeping up with you.”
Cora stopped and stared at her sister. This was the first reference she’d heard to the coming baby from anyone other than Eliza.
Again Vickie laughed. “Oh, don’t bug your eyes at me. You’ll soon be a married woman yourself. I’ve been wondering why you want to marry someone almost twice your age, though. You know if you’d wait, there will probably be other people move in here.”
Cora snorted. “I agreed to marry only because Mother gave me little choice.” She looked ahead where Mother, Eliza, Lenny, and Nicholas had almost reached the wagons.
Vickie sighed. “I see. Mother can be forceful at times, but Father is usually reasonable. Why didn’t you stand up for yourself? Father surely wouldn’t force you into marriage of all things.”
“Mother said Father has already accepted Mr. Reid’s proposal for me. I didn’t even know about this until he was gone.” Cora’s eyes burned. “He didn’t ask what I want. How could they be so cruel?”
Vickie frowned. “That doesn’t sound like Father. He must’ve had a good reason. Why hasn’t Mr. Reid come courting?”
Cora’s laugh was harsh. “Courting? Thank heavens he hasn’t.”
Vickie shrugged. “He may have thought it would be improper with Father gone. He seems like a nice man. Father wouldn’t do anything like this without reason. You should talk to him soon.”
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