by Em Petrova
Jess crossed the room so fast he didn’t remember anything but the thuds of his boots on the floor as he closed the distance between them. An inch from Sully’s face, he burst out, “You think because you found out that I’m a father that you can say I’m allowing my personal views to blur what’s going on with a terrorist spy? Dude, that’s like saying since you had your kid that you’re unfit to lead because a child might be involved.”
All the heat and fury threatened to explode from his body. He stepped back to keep himself from knocking Sully on his fucking ass.
“Stand down, Monet. We’re just having a conversation, nothing more.”
“No? Seems like an accusation to me. You’re telling me I’m unfit because of my personal life getting in the way.”
All of a sudden, realization smacked him.
Avery.
She was in the same damn boat with her review and her history… and neither of them had a damn paddle in sight.
Except he wasn’t going to allow his captain to strip responsibility from him the way it had been forced on Avery.
Fuck.
He glared at Sully. “I’m putting this to bed. I’m going to find Moreno and we’re going in to kill him. How’s that for personal? I’m going to call down the strike that will orphan his children, but it’s for the good of mankind. Now leave me alone so I can do my job.”
The finality of his words rendered Sully silent. He stood there a moment watching Jess. “I’ve got orders too, man. Don’t forget who tells me what to do.”
“Yeah, Colonel Downs, OFFSUS, the fucking Pentagon, whatever.” It didn’t make it any better for Jess.
Sully went out. Jess listened to his footsteps travel down the hall to his own office, where he’d probably put in a call to Colonel Downs.
Picking up his headset once more, he settled before the computer system. Dead air met his ears—Moreno’s conversation was over, picked up by his backup in another office in some other city, and Jess had missed it.
He pushed out a frustrated sigh and stared at what he’d recorded today. Not enough to get the asshole.
Shoving a hand through his hair, he turned his attention to written correspondence.
Maybe it was the adrenaline running through his veins from his argument with Sully. But suddenly, he read between the lines.
Something totally different stuck out to him.
Moreno… he’d been in the US not even a week ago.
“Fuck.” He got Colonel Downs on the phone and filled him in—Moreno was coming in through underground channels, and the thought he could be scoping things out for a bigger target had Downs and the entirety of Homeland Security on red alert.
Another hour and a half later, Jess was finally dismissed for the night, and hanging up that headset felt damn good. It also felt like he’d just given Downs and Sully the middle finger. And they thought he was too close to make calls on Moreno?
Despite his victory today, Jess rubbed the bridge of his nose, trying to alleviate the headache spreading behind his eyes.
Poor Avery. She’d been dealing with the same bullshit from her precinct. Jess probably hadn’t been supportive enough to her. The same way OFFSUS was accusing Jess of not getting Moreno because they’d just discovered he was a father was the same as Avery being told her past had caused her to shoot that man in the parking lot.
He regretted trying to speak to the police chief to help her. If the roles were reversed, he wouldn’t have welcomed her intrusion either, and he deserved every angry word she’d spouted off at him. He was also damn lucky she’d understood his side and forgiven him.
He checked his watch and registered the time. Right now, she was wrapping up one of the kickboxing classes she was so fond of but he knew was also keeping her mind off her problems with the review. After her workout, she was heading to the mandatory anger management class they had forced on her. Meanwhile, he was meeting Madison at the coffeeshop, and then he and Avery were joining up for a late dinner.
He spent a few minutes leafing through the papers he had for his daughter and waiting for Moreno to make another call. After twenty minutes or so, he gave up and left the headquarters.
The parking lot was empty—Sully had taken off as well. Jess’s anger with his captain had dissipated. Maybe it was true Sully was seeing signs of stress in him. Maybe he didn’t even recognize it in himself.
With yet another heavy topic to chew on, Jess drove to the coffeeshop where he’d been with Avery that day Madison had made the overture to approach him. His heart still leaped with warmth when he thought of that day, and the phone calls and texts he and his daughter had shared since then only added to his feeling that he might be on the right track with her.
At last.
When he reached the coffeeshop, he entered to see Madison and her mom seated at a table near the front so he could easily pick them out of the crowd. He meandered through tables to reach them.
Jenna stood. “Madison says she’d like to spend some time with you alone going over the project. I’m going to run some errands, and I’ll come back for her.”
His gaze flicked from Jenna to his daughter. A faint pink flush crested her cheekbones, and his heart tugged at the thought she could be nervous with him. He had news for her too—he was equally as nervous.
“Why don’t I just bring her home when we finish up?” he asked Jenna.
She looked around at Madison, who gave a tiny nod. She directed her attention to Jess again. “That will be fine.”
“I’ll have her text you before we leave so you’ll know we’re on our way.”
“I’d appreciate that. Thanks, Jess.”
His throat closed off momentarily. He cleared it. “Thanks for this. For… everything. Most of all, for giving me the chance I probably don’t deserve.”
Jenna placed a hand on his forearm and squeezed before letting go. “It’s never too late. Have fun,” she called out with a wave to their daughter.
Jess transferred the file of papers he had to under one arm. “Wanna grab some of those cinnamon rolls they have here?” he asked Madison.
She nodded and got up. He placed a hand on her back to steer her to the counter, where they ordered snacks and drinks. Then they sat at the best seat in the house next to the window and people-watched for a while before Jess opened the folder and they started on the project.
With a stomach full of treats and a warm heart, Jess drove her home. There, he received a genuine hug from Madison. Holding her in his arms brought tears to his eyes. But when she went on tiptoe to kiss his cheek, one of the tears escaped the corner of his eye and rolled down his cheek.
He brushed it away when she stepped back. She rubbed at her lips. “You need a shave.”
He chuckled, lifting a hand to his two-day-old stubble. “You’re right. Next time I’ll be sure to do that. Bye, princess. Let me know how the project goes. I’d like to see it when you’re finished with the family tree.”
“I’ll text ya.”
He grinned. “I’ll be waiting.”
He watched her walk into her house and heard a faint call of “Mom, I’m home!” before he walked back to his car and climbed behind the wheel.
As soon as he was alone again, his thoughts turned darker, Moreno weighting him down again.
Dammit—maybe he really did have a problem with stress.
Chapter Nine
Avery lifted a slice of pepperoni and mushroom pizza to her lips, her eyes on Jess rather than the movie they’d put on for their evening’s entertainment.
Something was wrong—he was silent and withdrawn, that much was evident. But she couldn’t help but feel there was more going on in that brain of his.
Was it Madison? Avery knew he’d met with her earlier at the coffeeshop to exchange details about the project. But maybe something had happened he hadn’t told Avery about. When asked about the date with his daughter, he’d only mumbled that it went well.
After watching him devour a slice of pizza so fas
t that she wondered if he was tasting it at all or just on autopilot, she set aside her own slice. Just as she was about to open her mouth and ask what was putting him into this mood, his phone buzzed.
His gaze slid to hers. He swiped his lips with a napkin and got to his feet, unfolding to his full height and making her crane her neck to see him.
“Monet,” he bit off, starting out of the room for privacy.
Avery sighed and reached for her pizza again. Her body was telling her after kickboxing that it needed fuel, but she’d lost her appetite with worry.
A moment later, he strode back into the room. From six feet away, he looked at her, jaw clenched.
“This is it. I have to go.”
She stumbled to her feet and crossed the space to him, placing her arms around him. He quivered with tension—or was it something more?
She tilted her head to meet his gaze. “Jess, what is it?”
“Can’t say.”
“But you’re worried.”
“Not worried exactly. Just… on edge, I guess.”
“Can’t you tell me anything so I can help ease you a bit?”
He pushed out a rough breath and gripped her shoulders. “Baby, you’re amazing. More than I deserve.”
She started to shake her head. “That’s not true.”
He stopped her. “It is true. I don’t deserve to have you.”
“Jess, where is this coming from?”
Rather than answer her direct question, he said, “I’m sorry again for trying to get information out of the chief about your review. I shouldn’t have—”
She stopped him this time with a forefinger on his lips. “Dammit, you’re going to tell me what’s going on before you leave here.”
“Baby, I’ve only got a few minutes. The team can’t get held up because of me.”
“I know that. But just give me some hint as to where you’re going and why it’s upsetting you so much.”
“Fuck.” He pulled from her hold and walked a few feet away.
When he looked at her, she saw a burning in his eyes that she’d never seen before. Her heart did a somersault.
“I’ve been following this guy, gathering intelligence on him. We thought we had him and we went in a couple weeks back.”
She nodded, urging him to go on.
“It’s as if… It’s… Fuck.” He jammed his fingers through his hair, ruffling it and standing it on end.
She wanted nothing more than to hug him and soothe him, but she knew men like Jess. No—she knew Jess. And he wouldn’t appreciate her attempts to comfort when his mind was a locked vault holding in the hard things he had to do for his country’s sake.
“Go on,” she said quietly.
“The guy’s got kids. I’ve listened to them so much, I feel like I know them. It’s more personal, and it’s different from the other situations I’ve been in. The anonymity is gone, and I’m not sure Sully and the others get it—how it makes me feel. But he’s also delivering intel into the hands of psycho terrorists. He’s shared information about attacks in South America, and there’s another planned. Which means we’re going in there and killing this motherfucker so we can get to the others before they take out half of Mexico City. But doing so means his kids could be in danger. But either way, I’m taking their father’s life.” He made a fist and struck his chest. “And that is fucking killing me.”
Her throat tightened. “Oh Jess.”
He dragged in a breath, staring at her. “I’m okay. I’m going to do it, because it needs done, and the world is better off without this asshole in it.”
“You know he’s doing this to himself. He’s made the choice to leave his children from the minute he got involved in this sort of activity.”
“I know. It’s like firing yourself for being late to work every day. He’s digging his own grave. But what makes all this worse is Sully and Colonel Downs don’t believe I’m capable of keeping my distance on this.”
“Can you?” she asked.
His face blanked. After a moment, he gave a hard nod. “Yeah, I can.”
“Then do it, Jess. Do your job as well as I know—and you know—that you can. But don’t leave without knowing this.” She rushed to him and threw her arms around his neck. “I love you,” she said against his chest, her words muffled.
His arms came around her.
She looked up and lost herself in the depths of his eyes. “Come back to me, Jess Monet.”
“I will. Fuck. I love you, Avery.” He tipped her face up and leaned in to brush his lips across hers. He tasted of pizza and man and all the things she loved about Jess.
He crushed her against him, and she held on tight. When they broke the kiss, she looked up into his eyes. “You’ve got this.”
“I know.” He searched her eyes. “And baby…”
“Yes?”
“So do you. That board is going to come to the realization that they’d be idiots to lose you. And very soon.” He cupped her face and planted a kiss between her brows.
He drew away and strode to the door. He threw a wave, and then he was gone.
She sighed out a plume of the emotions whirling through her, and it took her only seconds to realize they were all good. Admitting her love for Jess had somehow freed her more than she’d ever expected. The world felt exciting with new possibilities. She had supportive friends in the precinct and an amazing man who loved her.
Her gaze fell on the coffee table and she spotted yet another possibility—having an entire pizza to herself.
A smile spread across her lips as she fell to the sofa and curled up in the corner with her slice.
* * * * *
“Load up, guys. Chopper’s waiting.” Sully stood at the door, ushering the Ranger Ops team out to the SUV.
Jess slung his pack over his back and cinched the straps around the waist. Rushing through the procedure of grabbing their gear always made him worry about forgetting something crucial. He’d been the last man in and the last man out the door, and there was little time for wondering if he’d forgotten something. He had to trust that he’d organized everything and it was already in his pack.
As he passed Sully, the man threw out an arm to stop him. Jess looked up.
“Monet, about earlier.”
He waited.
“I was out of line. I see all you’re doing, and I realize it’s impossible to keep your head out of it at times. I’ve been there. I owe you an apology.”
Jess gave him a nod. “We’re good, man.”
“Glad to hear it. Now get your late ass in that vehicle.” He slapped him on the ass as he went by, and Jess chuckled the rest of the way to the SUV.
The guys were in a rare mood, laughing and shooting jokes back and forth. It lightened the mood of what they were about to do, and for that, Jess was grateful.
He also caught himself replaying his moments with Avery right before leaving. How she’d stared up at him—sweet, soft, beautiful woman, with her heart glowing all the way into her eyes.
Oh, he’d come back to her, all right. And he’d pick her up and carry her to bed and keep her pinned beneath him, crying out in ecstasy, for the first day or two. After that, he’d take her someplace nice where he could wear a tie and eye up her sexy legs in a pretty dress. Someplace with terrific food to go with the amazing company. Maybe they’d finally get around to that people-watching. Then reminisce over that mouth-to-mouth they’d learned the first time they’d met.
He had so much to celebrate and more to lose than ever before. Avery and Madison both had become priorities in his life in such a short time. How odd to think that mere months ago, he’d been battling loneliness and a measure of depression from keeping his own counsel.
In minutes they reached the airport where the chopper waited. As they ducked under the blades and climbed into the craft, Jess tossed Cav a grin. “Ready, man?” he called out over the din.
“Always fuckin’ ready.” Cav tossed him a smile of his own as he settled into posi
tion along the wall.
They weren’t in the air two minutes before the party atmosphere fell away, and each man grew serious. Cav stopped cracking jokes and became quiet. Sully pulled out a photo of his wife and child, looking at it with a half-smile on his face before he slipped it back into his pocket.
The others retreated to their own thoughts, Jess included.
His mind was on Moreno.
The man had to come to justice for his crimes. He wished there was such a thing as rehabilitating some of these guys they hunted. But there wasn’t. His momma always told him once a pickle turned bad, it would poison the entire jar and then they all had to be thrown away.
By taking down Moreno, it was possible his children could be saved—they might not yet be poisoned.
“Approaching Mexican airspace,” the pilot announced over the intercom.
Sully suddenly snapped his head up and stared at Jess. “Cav, get outta that seat,” he barked.
Cav jumped up and moved to take Sully’s as their captain landed next to Jess. He thrust his phone into his face.
“What the fuck does this mean?” Sully demanded.
He took the phone from him and gazed at the message there. A message from an unknown person with no traceable number.
“How the hell’d you get this?” he asked.
“It just came through as soon as we dropped altitude.”
“Shit.” He was looking at what appeared to be a message from a commander or a colonel, but something more stuck out to Jess.
A series of letters at the end, a signature of sorts, but scrambled. Jess knew damn well what they meant.
He jerked his head up to pierce Sully in his stare. “They’re onto us. Moreno’s calling us out—and it’s not here in Mexico.”
The guys stared at him.
“It’s on our own turf.”
* * * * *
“Is there an Avery Aarons in this class?” A woman stood at the door of the gym’s classroom, her face tense.
Avery swung her leg down from her high kick and turned at once. “That’s me.”
“Urgent phone call for you.”
She felt the blood drain from her face, down her body and all the way out her toes.
