“No, it’s not romantic, but…literature is very subjective. I can see your point, though, and that you’re very passionate about it.”
She leaned onto the table, her face close to mine as she said, “You’re damn straight.”
I stared at Eden—hard—feeling certain she was drawing on some deeply personal experience, but also that she was maneuvering me somehow—finessing me and the conversation.
I leaned back in my chair, my hands on my lap. “I think you’re deflecting, Eden. Answer my original question.”
Her brow tensed. “What question?”
“Do you think what you write is believable?”
At first she shrugged, then she nodded and said, “Yes, I do,” quite emphatically, yet still at odds with herself. “But it’s a damn novel, you know. It’s not really…real. It’s fiction. An author doesn’t have to be a killer to write murder mysteries.”
“Well, perhaps it can be real, Eden. Perhaps I can show you, and you can kill two birds with one stone, research and revenge.” I dropped my hand beneath the table and caressed her knee, lingered on the flesh along the inside of her thigh.
Her hands caught mine and stilled it in place, not letting me go any farther, but not pushing me away either. She was very conflicted; that much was certain—the look in her eyes, the way she worried her bottom lip with her teeth. And it would work to my benefit, I was sure. But instead of emboldening me, it gave me pause, and my longing inexplicably shifted from what I wanted for myself, to what I wanted for her—to feel desired, to know she was someone’s fantasy, a dream come true. I would show her what she’d been missing all these years, what her husband had denied her, that she was worth the effort, worth giving to, worth loving. And in my sudden need to be what her husband had not, I felt a fullness swell inside me. Not just between my legs, or even my heart, but in my soul.
Caught in that epiphany, I leaned in, my mouth a mere inch from her right ear.
“What are you so afraid of, Eden?” I breathed, and slowly, I moved to face her, so close, all I had to do was stretch my neck, ever so slightly, and my mouth was on hers, gently, my tongue a flick against her lips as I brushed across it. Next, my mouth was at her left ear. “Why not take the risk?” I pressed but for a moment before my mouth reclaimed hers.
Damn. I couldn’t help it. Though my head fought for control, my body was proving otherwise. I kissed her deeply this time, my tongue probing for hers, and, after a moment’s hesitation, she met me head on. My hand between her knees pressed forward, not rough, but definitely insistent. Undeniable. Her hands, once a tense and formidable barrier, relaxed, though she kept them resting against mine as my fingers edged upward, gently easing her legs apart to allow me access. And there it was, the lacy edge of her panties, and an intense, scorching heat. My heart ricocheted in response.
Eden sucked in a soft hiss as her mouth retreated from mine, but, though she pulled back for a split-second, a half-hearted attempt to regroup and regain control, she knew, as well as I, that it was impossible, and her mouth returned to the one place we both knew it belonged, right against mine. But even that proved too much for her, and she dipped her chin to lean her forehead against my cheek as she panted in anticipation.
Because that’s what this was. Anticipation. I hadn’t really touched her—not yet. I hadn’t invaded the space her wedding vows had long ago promised to one man, and one man only. That anticipation she felt was her sense of decency and fidelity warring with her desire, the basest need a human could ever experience. I wanted to prolong that moment, to draw it to a point where she felt unable to maintain any control whatsoever. I was almost there myself. My cock was a rigid mountain screaming for release. But it would have to wait. I wanted Eden to experience that first.
So I slipped one finger under the delicate edge of lace. She was so soft, so clean, completely bare and smooth. The silken lingerie was damp and growing heavy with her desire, and I didn’t have the wherewithal to keep from slipping between the slick heat of her sex, right there in the dark corner of a bar in the middle of fucking Ballard.
Shit!
I’d always been a bold motherfucker, but I’d never done anything like this. I’d never had the outright desire, let alone the goddamn balls, to commit such a wantonly private act in such a crowded public place. But that’s exactly what was so alluring, so intoxicating—the darkly forbidden. The rush of fear at being discovered. It had been a long time since I’d been pushed to take such risks. My whole body hammered in expectation.
I shifted my mouth back to her ear. My whisper came out as a ragged pant. “Christ, Eden, you’re so fucking wet. So ready for me. All you have to do is let me in.”
I groaned as I waged a battle of control, slicing through her furrow and plunging into her depths, my hand slick with her lust and need. Her legs parted a little farther, and, as she leaned back, her hands pushed me deeper, harder. She was in the moment. There was nothing standing between us now.
“Let me show you what you’ve been missing, Eden, what you need to let your imagination go wild.” I plummeted inside her, curling my finger to reach a place that would bring her ecstasy.
I moved against it, pushing and withdrawing as Eden rocked her hips against me. When she swelled and grew tighter, I inserted a second finger and rotated my hand, sweeping my thumb between her labia, until I found her sensitive nub. I rubbed it in urgent circles, harder and faster, my fingers pumping simultaneously, until she clasped my wrist, and her body grew rigid. She sucked in such a hard rush of air, I felt sure she’d choke, but she managed to hold her breath as her body was wracked with one relentless spasm after another.
Eden’s head tipped back, her eyes closed, and she released a soft moan so undeniable, the nearest patrons sniggered in suspicion. I couldn’t help but smile. I felt as if I’d just pushed her to release a whole lifetime of pent-up sexual tension in that one climax. The proof of it flooded against my hand. Damn. I knew I was good, but I never imagined bringing a woman to such dizzying heights in the middle of a public venue.
When she’d gathered herself enough to take a cleansing breath, she tilted toward me and laid her head against my shoulder. I could feel her heart thrashing beneath her breastbone.
I slid my mouth to her ear one last time and said, “Let’s get the hell outta here.”
Excited for what was sure to come next, I held fast to Daniel’s hand, stumbling out of the bar and tearing across the street. Daniel glanced around for the quickest way back to my car parked behind the bookstore, but there were no alleys or breaks in the building, and most of the retail shops were closed. Frustrated, he pulled me into a gyro shop, straight through the kitchen toward the back door. The employees gave us puzzled looks, and one even shouted that we weren’t allowed back there. But Daniel just waved and pulled me through the rear door and out into the parking lot.
It was dark behind the long row of shops, with only one light burning at the far end easily fifty yards away. My car was parked at the other, next to the chain-link enclosure that corralled trash bins and a lone Dumpster wedged up against an L-shaped wall. I popped the trunk with my key. Daniel dumped my briefcase in, and, after I opened the driver side door and tossed my bag and keys onto the passenger seat, he grabbed me around the waist and pulled me in for a blistering kiss.
We groped at each other as we careened back against the fence. It rattled so loud, I couldn’t help but tear my mouth away and look around to see if anyone had heard it. Daniel’s fingers turned my face toward him before placing both hands on the fence on either side of my head. I was trapped in a dark, out-of-the-way alley with a sexy, young stranger I’d met only once before, but damn if it wasn’t the most exhilarating encounter I’d had since Jacob.
So many things about Daniel reminded me of Jacob. Just being with him transported me back to a time when passion and desire ruled every thought. It was difficult to separate the intensity of those old feelings from what I was feeling now. My nerves were raw, my stomach ti
ght, and my head a flighty mess with all the adrenaline pulsing through me. For the first time in twenty years, I lived in the moment, enjoying the frenzy of this surprising new passion. So easy. Too easy, for Daniel kissed me like I was the last woman on earth. His mouth burned a torrid path down my neck and over my chest. I could barely breathe. Sensations I couldn’t put a name to galloped over every inch of skin his mouth blazed across.
He tore at my red, silk blouse. Buttons popped as he pushed it aside. Cool air rushed over the skin of my breasts. My nipples pebbled when the lacy material of my bra separated at the front hook and Daniel took one side into his blessedly warm mouth. His lips and tongue worked masterfully as his fingers kneaded the other, rolling the hardened flesh between his fingers in exquisite torture. I hummed in unfamiliar pleasure, unable to recognize this side of myself.
I laced my fingers through the silky threads of his hair and pulled him closer. My head tipped back against the metal barricade. Coherent thought fled as he grabbed my wrist and slid my hand to his cheek. After a delicious kiss to each fingertip, he slipped my hand to his chest, to his stomach, then pressed it against the massive bulge in his pants. His thick cock pulsed hot and ready through the worn fabric of his jeans. Instinct took over, and I squeezed the rock-hard shaft then rubbed my fingers down its considerable length. Damn, could he really be that big?
My gaze snapped up to Daniel’s when he moaned, barely in control. Our hands prowled hungry flesh as we stared into the depths of the other’s desire. I grinned. I couldn’t help it. I reveled in the effect I was having over him physically, something I’d only experienced once, long ago with Jacob. And in that minute, just as I’d been last Friday in the bar’s restroom, I was immediately taken back two decades, to the yearning, safety, and excitement I had with my first love. I went soft with longing and rested my head against the fence behind me, the memory so intense, I purred.
Daniel seemed unwilling to let the moment go, and, as I gawked in ill-contained admiration, he yanked open his jeans and freed himself. Then he slipped his fingers under the flowy edge of my skirt and tore my delicate panties away, sliding his hands behind my ass and around my thighs, and lifting me up as he moved his hips beneath me. I couldn’t believe this was happening, that I was allowing it to. But I couldn’t find the desire to stop. I wanted this. I needed it.
He boosted me higher with one hand. With the other, he directed his expansive tip between my legs. Hunger like I hadn’t felt in twenty years pounded through every square inch of my body. I dripped with expectation, so ready. He became instantly slick as he slid his broad apex inside me. My core quivered in both fear and anticipation, because Daniel was big. Massive. And it scared the shit out of me. His sheer size prevented him from slipping in entirely, but, as I wrapped my legs around his narrow waist and leaned back against the fence, he shifted his hips and slowly hauled me down the length of him, inch by blessed inch.
I sucked in a harsh breath as I engulfed him, tight as a too-small glove, but my flesh was more forgiving, and expanded just enough for him to fully impale me, tip to hilt. Every muscle in Daniel’s virile, young body grew rigid. His battle to remain in control was written all over his gorgeous face, his mouth open and his eyes drawn in both agony and ecstasy.
This was it. This was how it was supposed to be, supposed to feel. This was right, the way his body felt inside me, how mine felt around his. We shared an undeniable connection, an unmistakable pull. So strong. So urgent. Absolutely unrelenting.
I wrapped my arms around Daniel’s head and pulled him into my neck, settling fully onto his length with a moan. I held my breath as he reached farther inside me than any man ever. My body quivered, and ripples of pleasure coursed through me as I stretched to accommodate his considerable girth. He moved slowly at first, with small, gyrating circles that seated me to his root. I rocked against his hips, back and forth, side to side, reveling in the feel of him, how wide and deeply entrenched he was, the tip of him feeling as though it touched the back of my womb. My core pulsated in wave after wave of euphoria. Where once only our soft moans and labored breathing disturbed the quiet of the night, now, the ever-increasing whine and screeching of the chain-link grew loud as Daniel began to move against me, lifting and plunging while his thrusts drove me into the fence.
My paranoia exploded, even with all the sensations careening through me, but Daniel seemed oblivious.
“Shhh! Oh my God, it’s too loud, Daniel. Someone will hear us and come investigate. Stop…stop!” I begged, though I hardly wanted him to comply. But I batted at his shoulders anyway, until he realized how concerned I’d become.
He pulled my whole body close into his and stepped away from the fence and over to my little, black coupe, where he bent his knees and lowered me onto the front end. The sloping hood provided the perfect height and angle, and, as Daniel rested my bare ass onto the cold metal, he pulled my arms from his shoulders and gently pressed me back to lie down. He slipped my black sky-high Louboutins off one at a time—clunk, clunk on the pavement—then pulled my hips forward and spread my knees wide. Now fully exposed, I felt my flesh open and expand, like a blossoming rose captured in rapid time-lapse.
The bold act inflamed me beyond reason, because even though it was dark, the night sky shrouded in clouds, I knew he could see every inch of me as my petals unfurled and dilated, swelling full with an intense and pounding arousal. I felt his dark eyes lap at our connection, where his thick shaft penetrated my body, and his fingers probed my satiny fissure, spinning crazy circles around the tense bud within. I was a spinning top, teetering at warp-speed on a narrow axis as the auger drove deep. I couldn’t catch my breath. He hammered his massive cock into me while relentlessly drawing me closer toward release with the maddening manipulation of his fingers—around and around, back and forth, in and out, all at the same time!
“Oh my God, Daniel” I begged. “I can’t take it. I can’t! Please!”
But he was merciless, ruthlessly determined, and, as the moon glimmered through a small break in the clouds, I was drawn into the glowing light in his eyes, the intensity of his arousal barreling me heedlessly into complete and total rapture. When I got close, almost there, he’d back off, just enough to catch my breath. Then he’d start all over again, his fingers slicing through me, probing the tight ring of muscles in the back, then rubbing wild circles as he pumped me with a fervor and enthusiasm only someone so young could endure. And when I was there—at that blessed moment, standing at the very precipice of surrender, ready to erupt—he hiked my knees over his shoulders, lifted my hips, and pushed me to a whole new level of pleasure and pain, of divine euphoria so intense, I felt as if my body was ready to fracture into a million little sharp-edged pieces.
I covered my mouth to keep from screaming, and Daniel, in one swift but gentle movement, dropped my legs and gathered me into his embrace as we climaxed together, the spasms wreaking havoc on every muscle in my body, especially my core, which throbbed twice the rate of the heart thrashing inside my chest. My whole body tensed and thrummed in violent mayhem. Absolute chaos. Utter pandemonium. I’d never felt anything like it in my entire life, so acute, so powerful and all-encompassing. Overwhelming every sense, every emotion, every thought. I feared I might go crazy from the sheer magnitude of pleasure coursing through me.
The seconds ticked by, first one minute, then two, and all the while Daniel continued to hold me in a fierce embrace. But my body trembled regardless. At first, it was just from the act, from our lovemaking, from the most fulfilling release I’d ever experienced. But then Daniel eased me back down onto the hood, spread me wide again, and slowly slipped out, running both his fingers and the end of still-hard cock back and forth, front to rear, over and over, until his breathing calmed and his muscles relaxed. The waves in my core ebbed, and as my heart settled into a more comfortable rhythm, my conscience began to nag at me.
I tried to push it aside, to focus on the most amazing and daring thing I’d ever done in my whole fo
rty-one-year existence on earth, but my sweat-drenched nakedness, exposed to the damp chill of the evening air, began to overwhelm me—my indecent position on the hood of my car, my blouse ripped half-open and my bra split wide at the center hook, my breasts free and bare, the tips hard and puckered.
I pulled my knees together and snapped my arms in tight to my chest as I tried to work the clasp at my bra. Daniel tucked himself away then leaned forward and pulled my blouse closed, fastening the few remaining buttons while I spread my skirt back down over my thighs. My naked backside still rested against the cool, metal hood. I pushed Daniel away and hopped down to search for the underwear he’d torn from my body in his excitement. I found them on the asphalt near my left front tire, though, after examining the silky, red fabric, I was dismayed to discover they were ripped on both sides. I’d be forced to drive home commando. My face stained a bright crimson at the thought. But my embarrassment was just the beginning.
I couldn’t believe what I’d just done—fucked some young grad student in a back alley, someone I’d only recently just met.
What the hell is wrong with me?
From there, my nerves took over, and I began to shake even harder, the tears only moments away from overwhelming me as guilt and shame enveloped me like a sandstorm. I felt smothered by it and could hardly catch my breath.
“Hey now,” Daniel spoke calmly, “there’s no reason to be upset. Everything’s okay.”
But I shook my head and held out my ruined panties.
He had the good grace to look embarrassed as he reached out and took the destroyed lingerie from my hand. “Ugh, shit, I’m sorry. I’ll fix it.”
But just the sight of my wrecked underwear in Daniel’s hands intensified my panic. How could I have been so careless, so utterly reckless? To break my wedding vows and have sex with a virtual stranger, and to do it outside where anyone could have discovered us, taken video then plastered it all over the Internet. The risk I’d taken was incomprehensible. He hadn’t even used a condom, for Christ’s sake. What in God’s name was I thinking?
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