“Oh, you’re fine. No worries at all,” she replied.
“Here, lemme lower the ramp,” the brother announced, the mechanical whine of the hydraulic lift drowning out his voice even more than the music.
As the ramp lowered into place, Marybeth left to assist the last remaining student whose parent had just arrived. I pushed the wheelchair up inside the van, turned it face-front, locked the wheels into place and belted Robbie in, just as I’d done countless times before for his mother.
“There you go,” I said and ruffled the smiling boy’s hair. “All set.” I turned toward his brother with my hand out. “Hi, I’m Eden Ross. It’s nice to meet—” I froze mid-sentence as Robbie’s brother shifted in his seat to greet me.
He smiled—so big it took my breath away—and accepted my outstretched hand. “Miss Ross, is it?” he asked.
Robbie giggled. “No, it’s Mrs. Ross, you silly!” he corrected.
His brother looked from Robbie to me, and, with a twinkle in his eye, said, “Oh, I see…Mrs. Ross. So you’re married then?”
I remained planted in place, stunned and speechless.
“Sean!” Robbie scolded in his little sing-song voice. “Misses means married, you big goof!” He giggled again and squirmed in his seat.
I stared at Robbie’s brother and finally broke my silence. “Sean? But…I thought—” I started but was abruptly cut off by a stern look from Robbie’s brother. So I turned to Robbie. “Would you mind if Sean and I had a word in private? It’s just grownup stuff I need to pass on to your mom.”
Robbie shook his head and grinned at me. I ruffled his dark curls one last time.
“Great. We’ll be right over there by the doors so you can see us. Okay?”
Robbie nodded this time, and I swung my head, motioning his brother to follow me.
“Be right back, bud. Love you!” he said to Robbie, who blew a kiss at his big brother.
We walked to the doors and faced each other, careful to remain in Robbie’s sight, but turned away enough so he couldn’t hear us or see much of our faces. I was shaking all over, so angry and upset, but he merely smirked at me, obviously amused at my discomfort. I was about to unload on him when Marybeth called from a distance and waved goodbye. I returned the gesture as Robbie’s brother calmly waited for me to speak, knowing full well that, while I’d likely want to unleash my wrath on him, with Robbie watching, I wouldn’t.
I folded my arms over my chest. “What in God’s name are you doing here?” I fumed. “And I thought your name was Daniel. Why would you lie to me about that?”
As his brow rose high, that twinkle faded into what looked like shame, but only for a moment. “I didn’t lie, Eden,” he said with a small shake of his head. “Like I told you, Daniel’s my middle name.”
I dropped my eyes to my feet and my fists to my side, pumping them until my knuckles turned white. I had to mash my lips into a rigid line to keep from swearing vile insults. After a moment of deep breathing, my heart finally dulled to a simmer.
I turned my gaze back to Daniel…or Sean…or whatever the hell his name was. “This is illegal,” I warned. “You’re stalking me, and I want it to stop, now, or I’ll call the police.”
With a huff, Sean rolled his eyes. “I’m not stalking you, Eden. My little brother’s been a student here for over a year. And I’m just as surprised to see you as you are me.” He leaned in a little closer. “But…I’m curious. What exactly would you say to the police? Would you introduce me as your young lover?”
I gasped in outrage. “We are not lovers!”
Sean pulled back slightly at first, but then he smiled wickedly, leaned in even farther, and said, “Oh, I’m pretty sure—to some, at least—that you sliding your tongue down my throat makes us lovers. And, to others, allowing me to finger-fuck you to climax in a dark corner of a neighborhood bar makes us lovers. But, I can assure you, to everyone, that hot wax job we did on the hood of your car the other night? Yeah, that definitely makes us lovers.” He leaned back again. “But hey…go ahead and call if you wanna give it a try. Should be interesting though, don’t you think, Mrs. Ross?”
If eyes really could throw daggers, then mine certainly were, along with an arsenal of other lethal paraphernalia. But damn, it only seemed to make him smirk wider, that stupid twinkle back and burning even brighter.
“Seaaaaaaan!” Robbie called out from the van. “Hurry uuuu-uup. I’m hungry, and I don’t wanna miss Wallykazam!”
With his hand out, Sean turned back to the vehicle. “Just one more minute, bud, okay? I’ll get you home and make your snack. Then you can watch Wallykazam.”
With that, he spun back around and faced me, his head tilted just a hair and his dark eyes sharp and intent upon mine.
“I know you wanna hit me, Eden. Smack me hard right across the face,” he whispered with the hint of regret, “and that’s perfectly understandable. Considering my behavior, you’ve every right. But I claim temporary insanity. I just can’t seem to control myself. You drive me crazy, make me hard just thinking about you, let alone looking at you.” He inched his gaze up and down my body. “I’m sure I’ve handled this whole situation quite miserably, but honestly, Eden, I’ve never felt this way before. Never met anyone like you. Nor done the things we’ve done. Not ever. Not like that. You drive all reason from my mind. With you, I don’t think. I simply react. And it feels right. It feels good, like I can be who I truly am, the most natural, carnal part of me; and you do the same. You don’t overthink it. You just let yourself feel it, be overwhelmed by it, by me, by this thing between us, whatever it is.”
He took a small step closer, his chin over my shoulder and his sexy mouth mere inches from my ear.
“I know you’re scared, Eden, that, after however many years in your stale, loveless marriage, you don’t understand what you’re feeling. It frightens you. But it also excites you, doesn’t it? There’s a war raging inside you right now. Your sense of propriety insists you do the right thing, refuse to give in, acknowledge your desire, surrender to your fantasies. But you want to. That tight little body of yours screams for it. And that knot down deep inside, it pulses with need, eager and hungry for my touch. I bet, if I were to reach up under that long schoolmarm skirt right now, slip my fingers under those lacy little panties of yours, slice through that sweet, bare flesh, I’d find you wet, wouldn’t I, Eden? So fucking wet. Throbbing and dripping, just for me.
“Admit it. You want me to take you, to throw you down and fuck you from here to kingdom come then back again. You might say no, push me away, put up a fight, but that’s a lie, even if you refuse to acknowledge it. So I’ll make this easy. This…” he said, wagging his finger between us, “…whatever’s between us—it’s not over. This is what I want, Eden. I want you. You can’t stop that. You couldn’t the other night, and you can’t now.”
He hummed a quiet moan, aroused by his own lecherous words, and retreated a step, putting a safe distance between us, not that it did any good. Like he said, there was an urgent need pulsing deep inside me. I was wet. So fucking wet. I was throbbing, so hard I had to squeeze my thighs together. And, God help me—though I would surely say no, struggle against him, and fight with every ounce of energy I had—I did want him to push me down and take me. To fuck me hard from here to eternity.
I hated that he was right, that he knew he was right, and that he knew I knew he was right. My face burned with that knowledge, that he could see through me so easily, know what I was thinking, feeling, needing, wanting, before I could even figure it out for myself.
I couldn’t form a cohesive thought, let alone string two words together, to dispute his observations and quash any plans he had to pursue me. I tried and tried; I felt my mouth move, but nothing came out. And just like that, the moment was gone. He boldly put a single finger to my lips to halt even the attempt to deny him. Worried what Robbie might think, I looked over to see if he was watching, if he noticed his brother touch me so intimately, but the little boy
was playing with a small toy in his lap, completely unaware of the familiarity between his brother and me.
Before Sean dropped his hand and walked back to the vehicle, he stroked the back of his fingers across my cheek and tucked a few loose strands of hair behind my ear. The look in his eyes shifted from unadulterated desire to something akin to pleading, as if he were begging me to abandon the fight and just give in.
And that’s when I smiled, small and sad, surprised he couldn’t see that, no matter how much I might want to, with the memory of my mother’s struggle and everything I had to lose, there was no way I ever could.
“What just happened?” I said to myself as I watched Sean pull away from the curb and drive off.
Sean. His name was Sean. I could barely wrap my head around that. I knew him as Daniel. I’d daydreamed and fantasized about him as Daniel. That excuse he’d given me about not wanting to share his father’s name, it felt…contrived, somehow. Illogical. I just didn’t know why.
I clenched my jaw and squared my shoulders, because, truthfully, it no longer mattered. He no longer mattered. If I had to occasionally see him at drop-off or pick-up time, so be it, but there would be no more conversations, no more touching, no more trying to convince me we belonged together. It might not have been all that random, but what happened the other night, it was a one-time hook-up. One time. There would be no more. I had way too much to lose.
I might not love Declan as a wife should, but he was a decent father to Ian, and an excellent provider. I couldn’t bear the thought that my actions might splinter us as a family. Ian was on the verge of adulthood, of attending college and commencing the rest of his life. I couldn’t risk disturbing that. But, if I was being honest with myself, there was more to it than just that. As important as Ian’s needs were, I had my own, as well.
Truth was, I didn’t want to lose everything just because Declan pulled the strings and paid all the bills. I wasn’t as strong as my mother, and I’d never been on my own. With Declan hiding our property in his corporation, and with all the conditions in our prenup, I’d be left with very little until I started receiving any royalties. And I had no doubt Declan would make my life as difficult as humanly possible, probably even keep Ian from me until he turned eighteen.
Then there was my school. It was a huge part my life. If he found out about Sean, not only could he take that away, he could also ruin my reputation forever by leaking sordid details about our brief affair to the parents of all my students. And he’d do it, too, to gain favor during a divorce. To win. He’d crucify me.
So, no matter how sexy Sean may be, no matter how incredible or fulfilling the sex was, or how exciting it felt to have such an intelligent young man so interested in me, it wasn’t worth the risk. I’d gone this long already; I could continue to live without. The finality of that decision weighed heavy as I trudged down the deserted hall, back to my office, as if in a trance. Depressed and anxious, I collapsed into the seat behind my desk and fingered all the files and paperwork sitting there, but, after only a couple minutes, my nerves proved too taut, and I couldn’t sit still or concentrate. So I stood and began to pace back and forth in front of the long window.
I stared out over the calm, blue waters of Meydenbauer Bay, across Lake Washington, toward Leschi and Madrona and the rest of the eastern Seattle shoreline. I knew they were there. I’d peered across the water at those neighborhoods a million times over the last fifteen years. But I couldn’t see them now, not with all the turmoil racing through my body, all the emotions swirling around my heart. The trepidation of seeing Sean again had invaded my soul and tugged at my core. I felt it pulsing between my thighs like a heavy drum.
“God, why can’t I get him out of my head?” I whimpered. I wasn’t used to all the carnal thoughts, the need, the want. I felt like a long dormant volcano suddenly resurrected back to life, and the shock of seeing him again so unexpectedly had sent me over the edge, like a cloud of hot ash during an explosive eruption.
“How is this possible?” I said aloud. “How did he find me?” I paused and stared blindly at the water. “Robbie,” I whispered. “They’re brothers, and Robbie’s been a student here for over a year. What are the chances?”
I resumed pacing, deep in thought. I had to make sure everything was on the up and up. Robbie’s family history would be in his records. His parents and any siblings would be listed. I returned to my desk and sat down, sliding out the keyboard and typing away to call up student records.
“Robert Danzig,” I mumbled as I tapped on the keys then hit enter. I scanned the monitor. “Here we go. Robert Louis Danzig. Nickname: Robbie. Parents: Will and Ariana Danzig, Residence: NE 14th Place, Medina, Washington.”
My eyes grazed quickly over the rest of the information. They had no other children, but Ariana did have a child with her first husband, a son. Unfortunately, only his first name—Sean—was listed in the main part of the family history page, but anyone who had the responsibility of transporting one of our students had to have his or her full contact information on file. So I scrolled down the page until…
“There you are...” I said as I began to read through it. Then, “Wait. What? No way. No, no, no, no, no. This…this can’t be right. It can’t be.” I checked and rechecked the information. Dear God, it was correct. “What the hell! You’ve got to be kidding me! Sean Bennett? The guy from Twitter? Holy shit! Oh my God, he is stalking me! Oh my God. Oh my God!” I shrieked.
My heart began to race so fast, I grew lightheaded and out of breath. He was stalking me. He’d been following me somehow, tracking me. He probably knew everything about me, where I lived, my personal contact info, everything. Paranoid, I glanced around my private office, then around the main administrative office beyond my door. Everyone else had gone home for the day. Only one desk light glowed in the far corner. The rest of the office was growing dim in the waning afternoon. Cool fluorescent light radiated from the far end of the hall outside the main office. Was someone out there? Was he watching me even now? Every one of my senses went on heightened alert, and, over the loud thumping of my heart, I could’ve sworn I heard a noise.
I jumped up from my desk chair and took a few tentative steps toward my open office door. Once there, I poked my head out and scanned the empty space beyond, but saw no one. Then I heard the noise again. Louder this time. And closer. It was coming from out in the hall. I swallowed my fear and strode with a sense of confidence I didn’t actually possess, but I didn’t want to appear a coward. I made my way to the main office door, squared my shoulders, and bolstered my nerve before I peeked around the doorjamb and down into the long hall, toward the single burning light. And there he was, Mr. Banta, our elderly Filipino custodian. He was polishing the floor.
Relieved and with a hand to my heart, I watched the petite man as he maneuvered the buffing machine back and forth across the colorful vinyl tile. He made his way down the hall, almost dancing to the tunes playing through his noise-cancelling headphones, something he was proud of since receiving the extravagant birthday gift from his grandson. I couldn’t help but smile as his hips swayed from side to side and, every once in a while, he’d tap his toe, then a heel.
With a sigh of relief, I turned away and grabbed the knob to swing the door closed. But, just as it was about to shut, a man’s foot blocked the path and stopped the door in its tracks. A hand pushed it toward me. Startled, I jumped back with a gasp and clutched both my hands to my chest.
“It’s all right, Eden. It’s just me.”
Oh my God. Sean. Here. Inside my school. And I was essentially alone. Even if I screamed, no one was around to hear me, except Mr. Banta, but he had his headphones on. Shit!
I moved in reverse, one slow step, then another.
“Stay away. Don’t come any closer,” I ordered as I backed into a desk. With one hand behind me, clinging to the edge of the desk, and the other raised in warning, I pointed at Sean as he did exactly what I told him not to.
“Eden, relax. I’
m not gonna hurt you,” he replied in a calm voice.
“You…you’re…you’re trespassing. This is…this is private property. Leave now, or…or I’ll call the police,” I commanded in my sternest Principal’s voice.
Sean stopped and chuckled. “We’ve been through this already, remember?”
I shook my head. “That was before I knew who you really were.”
Sean pulled his chin in close. “And who would that be?” he asked with his brow pulled into a tense furrow.
I skirted the desk and resumed my slow backward march toward my office door.
“Sean Bennett,” I muttered. “The same Sean Bennett who’s been stalking me on Twitter.” I paused and shook my head again. “God, you must think I’m an idiot for not putting it all together. I mean, two U-Dub grad students engaging me at the same time? And I was too naïve to realize they were one and the same.” I rolled my eyes, embarrassed by my own gullibility.
Sean offered a small, sympathetic grin.
“Don’t beat yourself up, Eden. I purposely kept that from you. But, in my defense, this all started as little more than a game. You intrigued me that first night, and I wanted to know more about you, but realized you’d probably never engage with me again, so I used Twitter. I knew there was no way you’d recognize me, and I hoped you wouldn’t mind the attention. I apologize for the ruse. I planned on coming clean the next time I saw you.”
“I don’t want to see you anymore. Please leave. Now.” I raised my chin, turned, and rushed for my office. I heard Sean race after me, right on my heels.
He caught me by the elbow. “Eden, wait—”
Yanking my arm free, I spun around to face him, only now I was more angry than scared.
“What is wrong with you?” I railed. “Why won’t you leave me alone? And why are you stalking me?”
Sean stopped short and raised his hands. “Whoa. I am not stalking you. I swear. It’s all been just dumb luck, running across you like this. Who knows, maybe we’ve passed by each other dozens of times before, but we didn’t realize it, because we didn’t know each other yet. Have you even considered that, Eden? Maybe it was just serendipity that we met at the bar, destiny throwing us together, an inevitable circumstance, constructed by Fate herself.”
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