by Lily White
“Yep. Hope you have the keys on you because it’s going to be difficult for you to ride off without ‘em.” Standing up, he stretched out his body before walking to the door. “I’ll head out and unchain them and give you two some time to yourselves.”
He was gone without another word and I was left on the floor with Holly straddling my stomach. “Hey beautiful.”
“Hey.” Her tired eyes looked down at me, but she still smiled like a woman in love. “Did he tell you anything else? What’s going to happen tomorrow?”
She didn’t beat around the bush, choosing instead to tackle the situation head on. It was one of the things I was learning to love about her.
“We’re going to be fine.” I didn’t know if that was the truth, but I didn’t want her worrying about it. “We’ll go meet up with your dad. He’ll see that you’re alright and then we’ll ride out like we planned. Henry even agreed to go with us. We’ll be one little dysfunctional family.”
Her laughter rang out again and I smiled to hear it. “I guess I can live with that.”
Pulling her down by the front of her shirt, I placed a quick kiss on her lips. “Damn straight you’re going to live with it. You’re stuck with me now.”
She bent down, kissing me long and hard before pulling away to say, “You better earn it then, ‘cause I won’t stick around with a man who doesn’t deserve me.”
Grabbing her hips, I pulled her tighter against me. “No worries there, Munch. I’ll be sure to earn it everyday.”
A loud bang happened outside and both our faces shot to look out the window.
Goddamned, sonofabitch, piece of shit motherfucker!
Henry’s voice echoed outside as he cussed out whatever had fallen. Holly looked down at me and smiled. “Guess you should go help him before he gets himself killed.”
I hated to let her go, but I pushed myself up and off the floor, heading in the direction of the loud, angry man outside.
After pulling the bikes down and under cover where the storm that was rolling in wouldn’t open up on top of them, we all moved back into the house to cook dinner and keep drinking. Hours passed as we told stories and talked about anything from people we’d known to the things we hoped to gain once all of this was over. Holly beat Henry in several hands of poker throughout the course of the night and I laughed every time his face turned red with disbelief and shame.
Later in the evening when music was blaring through the house, I danced with Holly, completely absorbed in the feel of the small woman in my arms. Henry was snoring away on the couch. Eventually, Holly and I decided to call it a night. We were both apprehensive about the following day, but we didn’t let that stop us from enjoying the little bit of time we still had together in Oregon.
After stripping down naked and climbing in bed, we made love to each other like it was the last time we’d have the chance. I worshipped every inch of her body and in turn she worshipped mine. We were two people born to be together, shaped by miserable lives and now attempting to escape the unfortunate circumstances that had given us the chance to know each other.
When we’d exhausted ourselves and were laying in bed barely fighting sleep as we both refused to let the moment end, she traced her finger over my chest, her head resting on my shoulder and her leg thrown over my stomach.
“You think everything’s going to work out, JD?”
“Yeah, babe, I do.” I didn’t, but she didn’t need to know that. Dread gripped onto my head and stomach when I thought about riding out the following day.
“Will you do me a favor? Will you promise to stay with me…to stay alive? No matter what happens, just promise me that we’ll leave together, that you won’t leave me behind and that we’ll be free of all of this after tomorrow.” Her words were followed by her yawn and I brushed my hand over her hair.
After a few seconds, I opened my mouth to lie again, because when it came right down to it, there was no way of knowing what would happen when we faced her father. But I didn’t want my girl waking up from nightmares, especially when I couldn’t be in her head to fight whatever scared her.
“I promise, Munch. No matter what, I won’t leave without you.”
Soft and slurred from the sleep that was taking her, she snuggled into my side when she said, “That’s all I can ask.”
I didn’t fall asleep with her and I spent most of the night staring up at a dark ceiling. The dread that had gripped me before felt like it would drown me, but I eventually had to push it away in order to get to sleep.
Our lives were on a crash course towards something that none of us could possibly know the outcome and I shut my eyes, finally sleeping before the first bits of morning light reached up above the horizon.
…
Turning the key, I let out a sigh of relief to hear my bike roar to life beneath me. She vibrated as she idled and I threw some shades over my eyes looking out into the forest that I knew I would miss once we rolled out. Henry was taking his dear sweet time tending to shit in the house and Holly was walking around in the driveway wearing her nervous energy like a second skin. Ever since we’d woken up that morning, she’d been pacing around, not really talking much or making eye contact with anybody.
I didn’t know what to say or do to help her, so I made sure to stay in sight in case there was anything she needed from me. As I looked over her body, I grimaced at the crap clothes she had on and I swore to myself that if we made it through this, the first thing I was going to do was take her shopping. She was a beautiful girl in so many ways and it was a shame to hide her beneath loose fitting clothes.
Walking back to me, she made sure to slowly look me over. “Mind if I ride on your bike, big man? It’s a long way to Arizona and a girl can get herself hurt hitchhiking.” She winked and I was happy to see that she’d turned playful. It could have been a front to hide her fear, but that was Holly. The fighter inside her might grow quiet every once in a while, but she would never die or give up.
“Don’t know, babe.” I leaned back to pat the seat behind me. “A man just might ask for payment for being so generous.”
Placing her hands on my cheeks, she smiled and the light danced in her grey eyes. “I think I have something that might be of value to you.”
Cutting off my resulting laughter, she kissed me. I was winded by the time she pulled away. Her eyes locked to mine, but then I noticed her expression grew serious. Speaking softly she asked, “You got another gun on you besides the one in the back of your pants?”
“Why?” I didn’t like her question and my eyebrow rose when she asked it.
“In case things go bad. Anything could happen, JD, so I might as well prepare myself for it. Don’t leave me helpless again. Please.”
She could have stabbed me through the heart and it would have been less painful. My first instinct was to tell her no, to tell her that I would protect her from anything that could hurt her. However, I knew that wasn’t the case. Deciding not to repeat the same mistakes that failed her before, I relented when I told her, “There’s one in my left saddlebag. Let it stay there for now, but if shit hits the fan, you can go for it.”
She nodded her agreement just as Henry stepped out of the house.
“Well kids, let’s get this shit over with, shall we? I’m too fucking old to be pissing around and not moving forward.” Climbing onto his bike, he looked back at us after it roared to life beneath him. Turning back, he slipped his bike into gear and drove slowly down the long driveway that led to the road.
My eyes flicked up to Holly to notice she looked like she would cry. After placing a soft kiss on my forehead, she threw her leg over the bike, climbing on and wrapping her arms around my abdomen.
I breathed out heavily, the fear and trepidation I’d tried to keep at bay finally weighing on me heavily.
Reaching back, I grabbed her leg before letting go to put the bike in gear and ride out in the direction of an unknown future.
Chapter Thirty
Holly
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br /> It didn’t take long for us to leave Oregon and roll out into the unforgiving sunlight of the desert sky in Nevada. The engine of the bike was so loud that I couldn’t really talk to JD, not that I had much to say even if I could. My entire body was tight with nervousness and fear and I gripped around his body while laying my head on his back. Closing my eyes against the wind that folded around him, I breathed in deeply attempting to chase away the anxiety that built inside me with every passing mile.
The sun has just been peeking over the horizon when we’d left the cabin and we were making such good time that we could drive straight through and make it to the abandoned roadhouse in Nevada by one or two the following morning. I wanted to stop, to spend the night in a motel on the way, but Henry was against it, wanting to ride straight through to get the meeting over with so we could all move on with our lives. I didn’t know how JD was able to drink so much the night before and still ride all day without growing tired.
Riding along, the cement buzzed beneath the tires of the bike and I let myself go to the freedom of the wind crashing against my body. It was hours that I got to hold onto JD, to feel him breathe and to hear his heartbeat pound against his back. Holding on as tight as I could, I felt like I could just merge with him, becoming one person so that no force would be powerful enough to come between us or split us apart. But I knew that wasn’t possible and that eventually I would have to let him go.
My mind crept back through everything that I thought I knew about my life: my mother, the years growing up in Dominion, the events of the past couple months. Mixed within the memories were the things that Henry had told me in the cabin, the revelations of my mom and my dad, the fact that I couldn’t remember JD or Henry from when I was young.
I was saddened by the cycle that seemed ever present in all of our lives. Pain, anger, regret – all of the emotions that most people worked so hard to avoid even though they come crashing down like a wave that you can’t outrun. I still found it hard to believe that my mother had been truly happy in the life my father had given her, but I couldn’t deny that Henry’s words had softened my heart towards the bastard who’d raised me. I didn’t remember him ever being protective of me, but I didn’t see why Henry would lie about it either.
After everything had run through my head a thousand times, JD turned onto a road that had few streetlights and we rode out onto the grim black darkness with only the headlights of the bikes for illumination. Glancing up at the sky, I noticed that the moon didn’t shine brightly above us and the stars were noticeably missing from the wide open sky. I didn’t know if it was an omen for the night to be so dark, but it felt like one when we rode up the road to see the flickering haze of bonfires in the distance. The engines seemed to sigh with relief when Henry and JD both slowed their pace and my body tightened to a point of pain when I realized we’d reached our destination.
Music could be heard blasting as we approached and I squinted to see how many bikes were parked in front of the house. It only looked like five from what I could tell and it made me feel a little bit better to know that my dad hadn’t brought all the brothers out with him.
When we pulled up, rocks kicked out from beneath the tires of the bike and I peeked around JD’s shoulder and shuddered at the sight. Memories flooded me and I gripped onto him tighter when I remembered this place from when they’d taken me from Hector. The images weren’t clear, but I remembered the blood on the ground and the fear that had coursed through my body during the exchange. JD must have noticed a change in me because he reached behind himself to wrap his arm over me in a sign of protection and support.
Killing the engine, JD stayed on the bike and we watched Henry climb off his to walk in the direction of the house. Bonfires rose up into the sky on each side and I figured from the location of the small sparks and bits of fire that escaped the main flames that my father and his men were around back. Henry looked back at us, nodding in our direction before setting off to look around.
“How you doin’ back there, Munch?”
I didn’t want to tell him the truth and say that I was scared shitless I’d never see him again. I didn’t want to admit that images of bikers being ripped apart and my body being raped in the blood were flashing through my head. I didn’t want to worry him, so I just said, “I’m good.”
He had to know I was lying, but he didn’t call me out on it and I was okay with our unspoken agreement to pretend like everything was going to be fine.
By the time we’d crawled off the bike and walked around enough that we’d regained feeling in our legs, Henry had come back from around the back of the house with a look of absolute horror in his eyes.
JD reacted immediately, noticing the same thing in Henry’s eyes that I was hoping I hadn’t really seen. “What’s wrong?” He’d dragged up me beside him, not letting me go. His entire body was rock solid from the tension in his muscles.
Henry just shook his head, swallowing hard to find the ability to tell us what he’d seen. However, as soon as he opened his mouth, a familiar voice shouted out above the chaos I could hear coming from the backyard.
“Baby Girl? Is that really you?”
The three of us turned to see my father stepping out from the shadows around the side of the house. My eyes glanced back at JD’s bike and I was wishing like hell I’d grabbed his other gun when I still had the chance. I didn’t want things to go south for us when my dad laid eyes on JD, so I broke away from him stepping in the direction of where my father had emerged.
“Hey daddy.” I forced my voice to not tremble, but my fear was thick over my words. Walking more quickly, I tried to reach him before he noticed JD standing with Henry on the other side of the house. Finally reaching him, I ducked my head when he reached out to take me into a big hug and I returned the gesture hoping like hell that he’d had enough to drink that he was in a good mood. As usual, his white beard hung low from his chin and his matching white hair fell down his back. He’d put it back in a ponytail at the base of his head and he wore his standard white t-shirt, with a cut over it and dark jeans that fell over his thick black boots.
After he’d hugged me for a few more seconds, he pulled away, holding me at arms length so he could look at me. “You look good, Baby Girl. I’m surprised. I don’t know what I was expecting when I saw you again. I don’t even want to admit what I was expecting, but you look good, not like anything has happened to you since you’ve been gone.”
Attempting to buy his approval and kind will, I replied, “Yeah, well Henry and JD have taken real good care of me. Couldn’t have asked for better people to be around.”
He grunted at my words. “Henry, I can believe, but JD deserves a bullet in his brain for what he fucking did to you.”
I kept my voice low, hoping like hell that JD couldn’t overhear us. “Yeah, well, he saved my life, daddy, and that’s all that should matter, right?”
His hands gripped my shoulders so tight that pain shot through me. I knew he was angry, but I wouldn’t react because I was afraid that he would direct his anger at JD. “You wouldn’t have been in that position to begin with if it wasn’t for that man.”
It grew silent between us and I could hear Henry and JD’s boots as they approached. My father looked over my shoulder at the two men and his face took on an expression that was lethal. He didn’t say anything, simply releasing me and stepping back to pull the gun from his waistband.
“Daddy…” I jumped forward trying to stop him, but Henry caught me from behind before I could reach him.
The gun was pointed to JD’s head within a split second and my heart stuttered in my chest. Tears burned at my eyes, but they wouldn’t fall. Every part of me felt frozen when I looked at the barrel of my father’s gun, when I realized that the man I could never again live without had a bullet pointed at his brain.
With narrowed eyes, my dad looked at JD, his finger pulled tightly over the trigger of his gun and his hand shaking from the amount of alcohol that was undoubtedly runn
ing through his blood.
Henry broke the heavy and tension-filled silence. He voice was calm and soothing when he said, “Now, Joker, JD brought your daughter back to you in one piece. You made a deal and JD has held up his part which means you have to hold up yours.”
“My daughter was TORTURED because of this asshole! He killed two of my fucking men! I think I have every fucking right to kill him.” He was screaming.
“You’re right, Joker, but we’ve already been over this. You agreed after finding out what JD had done. He hasn’t done anything since then but protect your baby girl while she got better.”
Friend to friend, Henry spoke to my dad, but all I could do was stare in my father’s empty eyes. My words failed me and I refused to move for fear he would pull the trigger if he startled. Silent prayers screamed from my head that Henry would be able to diffuse the situation.
Finally, after what felt like hours, my daddy responded to Henry. “I know Mad Dog. I ain’t going to kill the kid. I just want him to understand what’s going to happen if he ever comes around my little girl again.” Directing his full attention on JD, he said, “This girl here is my property.” He nodded his head towards me. “You come near her again and your brain is going to be sprayed over whatever surface you happen to be standing in front of. I’ll let you live this time on account of who your daddy is, but my friendship with him only goes so far when it comes to my daughter. You get me, boy?”
My first reaction was to object to what he was saying, the anger in me building to a point of boiling rage when I realized that my dad didn’t fault himself for anything that had happened. Who the fuck was he to think he could keep me away from JD? I wasn’t staying here. Biting my tongue, I bit back my reaction. It wasn’t a good idea to poke at him when he was a pull of the trigger away from killing the only person I truly cared about.
JD never responded to my dad, never said a word. Glancing to my side I could see that he was standing with a stoic expression on his face. He didn’t have his hands raised in surrender because he wasn’t the type to back down, but he also wasn’t challenging my father.
