‘You’re so lucky.’
‘I know. Now then…’
She poured me a large glass of red wine, led me into the sitting room and pushed me down into a chair.
‘Sit there, shut up, drink that and don’t move. I’m just going to check she’s OK.’
I sat and sipped my wine, looking blankly out at the garden that was strewn with brightly coloured plastic toys. I tried to remember how old Tabitha was. She must be about a year old. Had I been so self-absorbed I had missed her first birthday? I felt thoroughly ashamed of myself.
My phone pinged with a text message. I felt my heart flutter. Could it be Bryn?
Superfine Supermarkets. We love your food as much as you do. This is to advise you that seasonal vacancies are now available. Please contact Mr P. Phillips at your local store. Superfine Supermarkets.
I almost laughed. A job? How did this work, then? I thought it meant weeks of waiting for clearance? Christmas wasn’t far off.
Sophie came back downstairs and hurried over to hug me. I put Superfine Supermarkets out of my mind for a while.
‘Now then, Tabitha is out for the count. Tell me what’s happened,’ she said.
‘I’ve been a fool,’ I said. ‘I thought I was going to be OK. I was sorting out the cottage. You know Jess let me stay there for nothing in exchange for cleaning it and decorating it. Well it was going well. My sister came to stay for a few weeks, then she went back to Texas.’
I sipped my wine. Sophie waited.
‘Yes? And?’
I tried to put into words everything that had happened. Bonnie. Bryn. I closed my eyes for a moment and I had a searing flashback. Bryn whispering in my ear as he made love to me.
You have no idea how much I want you, I need to…now, now.
I gave a strangled sob and hid my face with my hands.
I said the first thing that came into my mind.
‘Oh Sophie, I’ve fallen in love.’
‘What?’
Why did I say that? I took a deep breath. Saying it was almost a relief. It made sense of my reaction. I had fallen in love with someone who was a cheat, a liar, untrustworthy.
‘I’ve fallen in love. With Bryn, Greg Palmer’s brother. He lives in the house next door to Holly Cottage. I didn’t want to, Sophie. I didn’t want to, but I did, and then I had a flood – a bath overflowed – I didn’t have any slippers, you see? And he took me back to his house and we went to bed.’
‘Calm down, breathe, Lottie. We’ve got all night. And what happened then?’
I bent forward, my arms clasped around my knees, trying to dull the pain in my heart.
‘Oh, Sophie, I can’t tell you how it was. I didn’t know. I didn’t realise…I can’t tell you how wonderful it was. How he made me feel.’
Ah, Lottie, you’re so brave and beautiful.
Sophie got up and went to get another glass and the bottle of wine from the kitchen.
‘I feel so guilty,’ I said at last.
Sophie topped up my glass and filled one for herself.
‘Lottie, I hate to break it to you but you’re allowed to have sex with another man, you haven’t taken Holy Orders, as far as I know.’
I gave a shaky laugh. ‘No.’
‘Ian’s been dead for nearly a year…’ she said.
‘Ten months.’
‘OK, ten months, whatever. You’re a young, single woman, Lottie. You’re pretty. You have a nice figure. You’re intelligent. You have the rest of your life to fill. Meals to cook, books to read, countries to visit, men to screw.’
‘I didn’t think it was just screwing. I thought he loved me,’ I said. I gulped, realising how unutterably stupid I sounded. I’d thought I’d loved Ian, but had I? I’d thought Ian had loved me too. But had he?
‘Well, perhaps he did?’ Sophie said.
‘No. I was just one of his friends with benefits. There was Bonnie – an ex of his on the scene. She was obsessed with him. I expect I am as well. And then some other woman he kept mentioning. Lady Trehorlicks. He said she was in her eighties but how do I know he’s telling the truth?’
Sophie screwed up her face. ‘If it’s the Lady Trehorlicks who was on Gardeners’ World the other day, she’s a classic battle-axe and definitely in her seventies. Christ, I can’t believe I just said that. You can see what my life is like these days, can’t you? Watching Gardeners’ World. Anyway I remember her because she tore a strip off Alan Titchmarsh. He annoyed her. Something about sitting on her husband’s bench. I can’t believe she would be a friend with benefits. Not unless Bryn’s got very unusual tastes. God, Lottie, come back to the real world with the rest of us, it’s much easier. You’d like it here.’
I know you like this. And this.
‘We spent a whole day in bed. There was a flood at Holly Cottage but I didn’t realise how bad it was. I managed to blow the fuses, all the lights went out, and Bryn came to help me out. He took me back to his house and by the time I remembered about the cushions being a bit damp, the ceiling was down. The place was wrecked, there was plaster everywhere. I don’t know what I’m going to do.’
Sophie looked at me in silence for a second and then she burst out laughing. She actually laughed. I’d just told her a catalogue of disaster and she laughed. Then I thought about it and realised that it might seem a bit funny. Sort of. The water had been dripping through my sitting-room ceiling and I had been naked in bed with my neighbour doing some pretty amazing things.
Sophie wiped her eyes and tried to catch her breath, holding one hand over her chest.
‘He must be quite something. Count yourself lucky. Jack can’t raise more than a smile with work and the miles he has to drive now. He hardly touches me these days.’
And here, do you like it when I touch you here, Lottie?
I wished my mind had an off switch so that I could forget.
‘I’m going mad, Sophie.’ I suddenly felt so tired. Perhaps it was the wine. ‘I’m sorry to ask, but can I stay here tonight?’
‘Christ, yes! Of course you can, you daft cow! The spare bed is made up, there are some of Tabitha’s toys over the floor, but you could just kick that out of the way. I’ve been having a bit of a clear out.’
‘It really doesn’t matter. I’m so grateful.’
‘Food first,’ she said. ‘I’ve made some soup, will that do?’
‘I don’t think I could eat anything.’
‘Well you can watch me then. Come on. Jack will get something to eat in the pub with Bruce. You can tell me all over again. And don’t leave anything out. Especially the good bits.’
She took me into the kitchen and put a bowl of chicken soup in front of me. It smelled wonderful, rich and slightly spicy. Despite myself I took a small spoonful and then another. Sophie passed me some French bread and we sat and talked and ate. I felt myself relax and I told her everything that had happened. The deliberate flood, losing my ring, the earrings by the side of the bed, the hot tub incident.
Sophie couldn’t help herself. These things, which when I was on my own sitting in the cottage and worrying had seemed so awful, made her roar with laughter. At one point she had to find a tissue and wipe away her tears.
‘I know I shouldn’t laugh. I’m sure it was awful, but you’ve had a bit of an adventure, haven’t you?’ she said at last. ‘It’s a bit different from your life with Ian. Think of it like that.’
‘I suppose so. It’s not what I wanted though.’
She put a hand over mine. ‘I’m sorry, Lottie; I know it must have been terrible for you. But what do you want?’ she said.
What do you want?
You. I want you.
‘I think I’ll probably take up Jenny’s offer to visit her in Texas. Just take the opportunity to get away.’
‘Ha! Cowardy custard!’ Sophie jeered.
‘I’m not!’
‘You are so!’ Sophie went to get another bottle of wine.
‘Not for me,’ I said, my hand over the top of my glass.
‘This isn’t for you, it’s for me,’ Sophie said, unscrewing the top. ‘You know you might be wrong about him. About Bryn.’
‘I know I’m not. I’m sure I’m not.’
She shrugged. ‘If you’re not going to ask him what he’s playing at you could always ask the other people who might know?’
‘Who?’
She slapped my hand out of the way and topped up my glass.
‘The people who know him, the people who might be able to shed some light on things; Jess and Greg Palmer of course.’
Jess took one look at my face, caught hold of my sleeve and led me into the conservatory. She didn’t even ask me why I was there. I had a feeling she knew.
‘Sit down,’ she said, encouraging me towards a heavily cushioned wicker chair. She had been doing what passed for strictly indoor gardening in Jess’s world. She was dressed in tiny denim shorts over thick tights, pink Joules wellingtons and a T-shirt printed with pictures of trees. She had been busy planting bulbs in pots in one corner of the room, her French-manicured nails protected with suede gloves.
She sat down next to me.
‘What’s been going on, babe?’ she said. ‘You look terrible.’
‘It’s all gone wrong, Jess,’ I said. ‘So very wrong.’
She seemed surprised. ‘Has it? Really?’
‘You have no idea. There was a flood, an overflow of the bath…’
‘Yeah, I know.’ She pulled off her gloves and smoothed them down on her bare, brown knees.
‘I thought, well I didn’t know what to think. Bonnie, Bryn, all that stuff.’
Jess waved an impatient hand. ‘But I know all this. I told you, remember?’
‘Then there was the business of the house; I didn’t know you’d sold it to Bryn. And he wasn’t going to tell me.’
‘I’m sure he would have done. He said he was going to.’
‘No, he was pretending all the time. Lying to me about Bonnie.’
Jess reached forward and touched my hand.
‘Lottie, I know some of what happened between you.’
‘How?’
‘’Cos Bryn has been here. He was looking for you.’
‘He’s been here? Looking for me?’
‘Bryn is a big guy, he’s tough, but he’s been through a lot. First Helen and then all that stuff with Bonnie. And you gotta trust me; she’s poisonous. I’ve seen how she works, takes advantage of people, and because she’s cute she gets away with it. I’ve worked with girls like her. They expect to be the centre of attention everywhere they go. They expect treats and favours just because they’re gorgeous. And when they come up against someone like Bryn it drives then nuts. They can’t believe that they’ve lost their touch.’
‘Someone like Bryn? I thought he was taking full advantage of the situation!’
Jess shook her head. ‘Bryn loved Helen, why do you think he married her? When she went off with Craig it broke his heart. He was in a state of shock for months. Bonnie moved in on him like a piranha. She’s one of those women who have to win, all the time. He was fond of her, sorry for her. I mean, the four of them had been good friends before it all kicked off. You know, when Craig went off with Helen, Bonnie really went to pieces. She was in bits. Between you and me I think she might have tried to top herself. She said it was all an accident but I’m not so sure. She was a bloody nightmare for months and Bryn took the brunt of it. I think they propped each other up for a while but it was no more than that. And Bryn is honourable, he’s honest.’
I couldn’t accept that. ‘Ha! What about the money?’
Jess frowned. ‘What money?’
‘All those years ago. You told me about it. The money he took from his mother and never paid back.’
Jess shook her head and looked away. She stood up and walked to look out of the window. There didn’t seem to have been much progress on the swimming pool at the end of the garden. The diggers had gone but there was a portaloo and a metal storage shed in their place. It was some time before she answered me.
‘You’ve got the wrong end of the stick. That was Greg, Lottie. Greg took the money, not Bryn. It was years ago, before I met him. Greg was struggling and he got some money out of their mother. He behaved badly, she said it didn’t matter, he didn’t have to worry about paying it back straight away, but the years went past, and it never happened. Bryn fell out with him over that, not the other way around. Greg got all stubborn. They had a fight…’
I sat with my mouth open.
‘Why didn’t you tell me? Why didn’t you say something?’
‘I didn’t know for a long time. I told you as much as I found out. Anyway it’s private stuff, Greg doesn’t talk about it. Like I said, it all happened before I met him. But it was something you said that made him finally sort it out.’
‘Something I said?’
Since when did I come up with meaningful sayings?
‘It was that day when you showed him all those awful letters, d’you remember? The debts and the bills Ian had been hiding. You were in such a spin you didn’t know what on earth to do. You said, I want to do what’s right, even if it’s too late.’
‘Did I say that?’
‘You did. It stuck in Greg’s head, he couldn’t get it out. In the end he went over to France, sorted it all out with his mother. Apologised to her. Paid her back what was owed. It made a big hole in our cash flow but that’s not the point. I needed to help him do it, to show that I supported him. That’s why I wanted to sell Holly Cottage.’
‘Flip.’
She came back to sit in the chair next to me and leaned forward, her face very serious.
‘You mustn’t breathe a word of this to anyone, OK? It’s not something Greg’s very proud of. And then he went to see Bryn. After they had the chat, well, they sorted it out between them, but he said Bryn was in a hell of a state. He kept saying it was something to do with Bonnie’s earrings. He looked a bit like you do now.’
‘When was this?’
‘Oooh let me think. A couple of weeks ago, maybe?’
‘Oh God.’
‘That’s when we came up with a plan. Greg being Greg wanted to do something to sort everything out in one mighty sweep, and we hatched it out between us. And before you ask it was nothing to do with Bryn. The two hundred and fifty pound voucher to spend at Bryn’s garden centre. That was just a way to get you two back together.’
‘I guessed it was something like that.’
‘What have you done to each other?’ Jess said, shaking her head.
‘I don’t know. I don’t know,’ I wailed. My stomach was churning so much I thought I might be sick. I put my arms round myself and bent over to try and ease the feeling.
‘Where have you been, anyway?’ Jess said.
‘I’m saying with Sophie, a friend in the village. If nothing else I can babysit for her so she and Jack can have some time together. Where’s Greg?’
‘He’s gone over to Holly Cottage to start sorting out the repair work.’ She jerked her chin out at the building site at the end of the garden. ‘That’s where all our builders are now. That bloody pool’s never going to be finished.’
‘I’m so sorry,’ I said, feeling that the words were barely adequate.
Jess shook her head. ‘It’s not your fault, it was Bonnie who flooded the place. But –’ she looked thoughtful for a moment ‘– what I don’t really understand is how so much damage was caused in such a short time. I mean Greg says it looks as though that bath was overflowing for absolutely ages.’
She looked at me, waiting for me to say something. I could hear my pulse pounding in my ears and feel the hot blush spreading across my face.
‘Um.’
‘I mean Greg says if the tap was only just turned on a tiny bit, the damage caused must have taken a day or two, not just a couple of hours.’
‘Er.’
‘But you were around, weren’t you? And Bryn was too. Didn’t you notice anything?’
&nb
sp; Couldn’t Jess see how uncomfortable I was? I must have been puce with embarrassment by then.
‘And Bryn said he came and got you when the fuses all went. So when was that?’
‘Oooh, I really – um. You’d be better off asking him.’
Jess gave me an odd look. ‘Yes, he said exactly the same thing. I should ask you.’
I stood up and pretended to be interested in the empty garden.
Jess started to look thoughtful, tapping the arm of her chair with one finger.
‘And then you two fell out. He said you were annoyed about him buying Holly Cottage. But then what did Bonnie have to do with it? How could she have got in to turn the bath on in the first place? And why would she do it? That’s what I don’t understand.’
I started to babble on about keys and spilt milk and rats in the paint until Jess fixed me with a pained expression and I stuttered into silence.
After a moment she fished in the pocket of her shorts for her mobile and started stabbing at it.
‘Never mind, I promised I would let Bryn know when you turned up. He’ll be ever so pleased.’
‘No!’ I said a shade too loudly.
Jess looked at me, eyebrows raised.
‘I mean, no, don’t bother. I’m going to head back there now. I need some time to think, Jess. I’ve almost got it straight. By the time I get there I think I’ll be OK. And another thing, I saw my solicitor the other day. Susan wanted me to have the balance of money left when the house was sold. I have some money at last; I can afford to find somewhere else to live.’
‘Susan did? Gosh, did she? Well knock me sideways and call me Mabel! Bet you weren’t expecting that?’
‘Hardly. If the cottage belongs to Bryn then I owe him some rent, surely? And all the money you spent on the fancy paint and the carpets and the new curtains? Oh, Jess, what a bloody shame.’
‘Look, it’s a complete arse ache, but the insurance will cover it, I’m sure. And if it doesn’t I’ll go and beat Bonnie up.’
‘Oh, please don’t! I don’t mind contributing—’
‘Joke, Lottie! Keep your hair on! Just a joke!’
I stood up. ‘Well, look, I’m going now, I’ll be in touch.’
The Summer of Second Chances Page 24
