by Vella Munn
“It wouldn’t hurt. But no, I don’t need it.”
“Then—” This made no sense. Mark was clearing his throat again. But Kim decided to force the issue and see what developed. “Are you sure? There isn’t a person alive who doesn’t have money concerns.”
“I’m fine, honey.”
“I hope so,” Kim relented. “It’s just that I know where I got my stubbornness, don’t I, Grandmother?”
“We aren’t stubborn. We just know what needs doing and go about it.”
“Maybe.”
“Honey, I want you to listen to what I have to tell you. Listen and believe.”
“I will,” Kim whispered. She was both worried and relieved. Worried because she had no idea what her grandmother might say. Relieved because it was time for honesty.
“This house—” Margaret spread her arms. “It meant a great deal to me. There are a thousand memories— I wasn’t sure how I would feel about coming here tonight knowing I can’t live here anymore.”
“I know. It’s hard.”
“Yes.” Margaret was still smiling. “But I’m practical. If nothing else, I’m practical. Life has taken a turn I didn’t expect.” She pointed at her hip. “I can’t go on living here. It’s as simple as that. And it makes no sense to try to hold on to the house. I could have waited until I died and left that up to my relatives, but I refuse to do that to them. At least this way you and I can work together, Kim. You’ll have to do most of the work, but at least I’m here to back you up.”
Kim blinked back tears. “You’re a good woman. Practical. But there’s no rush, you know. You’re going to be around for many more years.”
“Maybe.” Margaret shrugged. “Probably. But, Kim, I’m not afraid of dying. Your mother was a wonderful teacher. Face what has to be faced, but don’t let anything defeat you.”
What a wonderful belief. Before she gave herself time to think about the wisdom of what she was saying, Kim told her grandmother about going into the cave-in. “It’s what you said. Not letting anything defeat me. I know. I shouldn’t have. Mark’s already given me the lecture. But, Grandmother, I’m glad I did. Now I’m not afraid of it. There was a skeleton in there. Can you believe that? An honest to goodness skeleton. It’s the strangest thing. The crime lab said the man died, it was a man, long after the old tunnel was shut down.”
Margaret Revis was white. “I—know. I mean, Mark told me about it.”
Kim was shocked, not because Mark had told Margaret, but because of her grandmother’s reaction. Margaret was trying, too hard, to smile. “What’s wrong?” She grabbed her grandmother’s hand. “I’m sorry. I didn’t think that would bother you. Believe me, I wouldn’t have kept on going if I’d thought there was any danger.” Mark’s eyes were on her, strong and relentless, not telling her nearly enough of what he was thinking.
“I wish you hadn’t done that,” the older woman went on, after too long a silence. “You could have been hurt. Anything could have happened.’
Kim felt as if the house was closing in on her. Things were happening that she didn’t understand. “It didn’t,” she said softly. “And, honest, finding what I did didn’t bother me that much. I mean, he has as much right to be down there as I did. More. I just wish—” Kim got to her feet and walked to the window. It was dark now but, because there was a half-moon out, she could see the outlines of pine trees and rosebushes. Being here felt good; miles away and a lifetime separate from what she’d experienced in San Francisco. “It’s a shame we’ll never know anything more about him and what he was doing there.” Kim turned back around. Her grandmother had aged years in a few seconds.
“What is it?” Kim hurried back to her grandmother and dropped to her knees. “Don’t you feel well?”
Margaret sent Mark a beseeching look. “I—my hip’s bothering me. I’m sorry, honey.”
“I should have thought— The walk was too far for you. Give me a minute to make a bed. You can spend the night here.”
“Oh, no. I have a breakfast meeting. I need to get home.”
“But—”
Over Kim’s objections, Margaret maintained that she was strong enough to walk back to the car. Mark backed up his client’s request. “It’s what she wants, Kim. We’ll take it slow.”
A few minutes later, Kim was walking with Mark and her grandmother down the dark driveway. Margaret was leaning against Mark and holding on to Kim’s hand. She kept up a constant chatter about planting the rose garden in the rain, arguing with a surveyor over the boundary lines when Rich Gulch Street was resurfaced, her concern that the city water system was on its last legs. Her conversation rambled.
“I’m sorry,” Kim whispered to Mark once her grandmother was in his Blazer. “I said things—”
“It happened.” Mark was standing, not touching her, his breath warm on her cheek. “I’m sorry it did, but it happened.”
Kim was miserable. “You have every right to blame me.”
“I’m not blaming.” Mark reached for the door handle but wound up touching Kim’s hand instead. “You did what you thought was right. You had no way of knowing how she’d react.”
She leaned into him, needing something, anything. “Thank you for bringing her here.”
“Go home, Kim. I’ll see you tomorrow.”
If only Kim hadn’t worn that soft sweater. If only her hair hadn’t fallen over her forehead, begging for his fingers to brush it away.
Mark had been silent during most of the trip back to Grass Valley. Margaret had filled the silence with questions and recriminations. Once in Margaret’s apartment, Mark had done his best to soothe his old friend’s concerns. Now, instead of heading for his place, Mark was retracing his steps. He had no idea what he would say to Kim, or how he would attempt to explain his presence. All he knew was that he had to see her. Alone.
A light was on in the living room and the curtain was open. For the last time Mark paused, asking himself if he had taken leave of his senses. And then Kim moved into view, and she was the only thing in the world that mattered.
“She’s all right,” Mark said when Kim opened the door. Ignoring the questions in her eyes, he went on. “It was hard for her. Coming back here. The memories.”
Kim stepped back and let him in. “I should have thought of that. I wish I could protect her. But—it’s something she has to face.”
“I know.” Mark gently kicked the door closed behind him. The room still smelled faintly of the meal they’d shared. He was even more aware of the scent of roses. “We can love the people in our lives, but we can’t protect them.” Mark stopped himself. Loving and trying to protect had gotten him to the impossible situation he was in now.
He wasn’t going to think about that tonight. “I didn’t want you to worry about her. That’s why I came back.”
“I can’t help it.” Kim had wrapped her arms around her waist in the gesture that told him she was no more comfortable with what they were and weren’t sharing than he was. “Do you know who her doctor is? Maybe I should talk to him.”
Mark could have given her the name, but didn’t. He’d stood, watching and not touching for as long as he could. He wanted to be a lawyer, only a lawyer. But if he was that and nothing else, he wouldn’t have come back tonight. Gently Mark pulled Kim’s hands off her body and placed them on his own shoulders. “I kept thinking about you,” he whispered hoarsely. “I could have called, but that wouldn’t have been enough.”
“It wouldn’t?”
Mark had no idea how he was going to guard himself against her. Or maybe the reality was that he didn’t want to. He’d rather surrender to her power over him. “Did you think I might, come back that is?”
“No. After the way— Mark, the truth is, I didn’t think I was going to see you again.”
He was wrong. She was unaware of her power, and just as unsure as he was. “I’m not going to want to leave. You need to know that.”
Kim’s night had turned into morning when she opened the do
or and found Mark standing there. She’d taken him inside and found her way into his arms. She’d even found the composure necessary for speech. But now he was saying the only thing in the world she wanted to hear, and she didn’t know what to say in return.
“It might be better,” she whispered.
“Do you really mean that?”
“I don’t know what I mean. Earlier, you were angry with me, weren’t you?”
Mark nodded. The movement was almost her undoing. “I wanted to protect Margaret. I didn’t want her upset.”
“Neither do I, Mark. But she isn’t a piece of china. She’s strong. She can handle—I know. I should have picked a different time to tell her about the jewelry and the skeleton. I should have been more sensitive to her mood, to what she had to deal with, being back in this house. But it’s too late for that now. And—” Kim stopped talking when Mark drew her against him.
His body was hard and strong. Kim felt soft and feminine in a way she had never thought possible. This man could take over, guide her in ways she’d never dreamed possible, and she would be rich beyond measure for the experience.
“And what?”
“I don’t know. Mark? Thank you for coming back. We need to talk.”
“Talk?”
He was challenging her. Throwing caution aside, Kim rose on tiptoe, seeking Mark’s mouth. It was a touch, a gentle feathering of lips against lips. Still, there was nothing gentle in what was happening to her heart. There was still a great deal she didn’t understand about Mark. Maybe she never would know everything. But if she didn’t at least try, Kim believed she would go through life knowing she’d turned her back on something that might become precious. Sitting across from him at the kitchen table and then watching him get into his car and drive away, had done things to her she never wanted to experience again.
She’d been given a second chance tonight. She would take whatever he offered and give everything that was in her to give. Tomorrow she would face the consequences of tonight’s acts.
Kim was the first to part her lips, to seek with her tongue. The softening deep inside her was turning into something stronger. Something she’d never experienced before but had been waiting for for a long, long time. She fit against him. He was giving her warmth where a minute ago she’d been cold.
“Just before you came, the evening seemed like a bad dream. So much went wrong.”
“I didn’t know if I’d be welcome.”
“I—” They were still standing in the living room with the curtains open and the moonlight washing over them. Needing to feel a little of the power she believed he possessed, Kim pulled at his shirt, freeing it from his waistband. She was touching his flesh, asking herself if she had the courage to go on, knowing she’d gone beyond that question.
“You want this? Kim, I have to know.”
“I don’t know what I want. No. That isn’t true. Mark? I think you know what I want.”
“I don’t want either of us to regret this.”
Kim took a deep breath. It didn’t do enough to steady her. “There’s no way either of us can be sure of that. But, Mark, you’re important to me. So important. It happened so fast. I can’t believe there’s something wrong with the way I feel. What—I want.”
“Are you saying—”
Kim didn’t wait for Mark to say anything more. It had been terribly hard for her to speak. She believed that it was the same for him. But if they couldn’t talk, maybe other things could take the place of words. Things like touching. And being touched. And letting go of restraint.
It was time to begin.
Mark helped with the undressing. When there was nothing between them, he stopped with his mouth on her throat. “There won’t be any stopping tonight, Kim,” he told her. “Do you understand that?”
“Yes.” She was barely whispering.
A minute later they were in the bedroom. Maybe she should be frightened by what he was capable of doing to her; she wasn’t. He explored slowly; Kim matched his pace, loving every inch of the journey. She put aside thoughts of tomorrow. They were together tonight. There was nothing else.
She hadn’t known. She’d had no inkling it could be this strong. This wonderful. That she would want any man this much.
But she did.
“You’re beautiful, Kim,” Mark told her with one hand caressing her breast. “So soft.”
Kim didn’t feel soft. She was pulsing with life. Every nerve in her ached with the need for them to become one, and yet what small shred of sanity remained understood the wisdom of holding back from that point of no return. It had to be right. More than their bodies needed to come together. “When you came back, did you know—” she asked with her palms covering his nipples and her mouth inches from his chest. He was giving her access to all of him, a gift far richer than any she’d ever been given.
“Did I know we’d wind up doing this? No. Of course not. I still don’t know what’s going to happen.”
Neither did Kim, but her need drove her on. Her hands and mouth became bolder, driving Mark onward just as she was being driven.
They became lovers with a sliver of moonlight slicing its way across Mark’s back. Somewhere—Kim cared nothing for the passage of time—she opened her eyes to find the moon watching. To wonder at magic. Since moving into the house, Kim had slept with the curtains drawn against the shadows outside. She would never want to do that again. She couldn’t imagine ever wanting to be anywhere but where she was now. Or with anyone except Mark.
She tasted of salt.
Mark couldn’t remember whether any other woman had tasted that way after lovemaking. What he did know was that he’d never been as lost as he’d been tonight.
They’d made love quickly, more quickly than he’d wanted. But she’d opened herself to him and cried out his name, and there’d been nothing left inside him but need.
The need had burned itself out. It would return; even now Mark was aware of what her body was capable of doing to his. The second time—there would be a second time tonight—he would pace himself and listen to her body’s messages.
“Are you all right?”
Mark had never had a woman ask him that. “All right? I’m more right than I’ve ever been. You?”
Kim nodded. She was still breathing deeply and quickly. He lay on his side with one arm propping him up and the other resting on her rising and falling ribs. Beneath that silken flesh was her heart. For the first time, Mark asked himself how much of a woman’s heart he’d reached. “You don’t regret this?” he had to ask.
“No. Never.”
He wondered if that was true.
Chapter Nine
Kim was alone. For close to two minutes the fact simply wouldn’t register. Moonlight had been replaced by the early morning sun. It should have been a glorious day, but without Mark beside her, she was unable to see the promise in dew and robins.
She didn’t remember his leaving. Because she was a light sleeper, Kim knew he couldn’t have left without her being aware unless he’d been very careful of his movements. She tried a half-dozen excuses but dismissed them as soon as they surfaced. No matter what his reasons, he should have told her.
Yesterday she’d been filled with enthusiasm for her job. Today work was nothing but a needed respite from lonely questions and an even lonelier body. She took a quick shower and pulled on clothes. She forced down a bowl of cereal and even drew in the fragrance of the roses she’d picked last night, but those acts were automatic. Today she decided to walk to the museum. She needed the physical exercise.
And she needed time alone with her thoughts and heart.
Kim had placed the small pocketknife on top of her dresser. She came across it while looking for her house keys. The knife’s weight in the palm of her hand comforted her somehow. It had survived its owner and served as a link with the past. Although she had a full day of work ahead of her, Kim took the time to carry the knife into the kitchen and clean it with silver cleaner. Rust still ob
scured some of the design, but with the aid of a toothbrush, Kim was able to determine that some lettering had been carved into it. Unfortunately the etching was too faint for her to make out.
Kim dropped the knife into her purse, locked the door behind her and stepped out into the sunlight. There was something about the knife that fascinated her. She supposed she should have turned it over to the crime lab, but someone who’d died in the 1940s wasn’t a priority with law enforcement. It would probably just be placed in storage somewhere and that would be the last anyone would see it. If she had time, she would try to research it by using the museum’s resources.
Kim never made it to the museum. She’d gone around the cave-in and was heading toward the main part of town when Mark’s now familiar Blazer pulled up beside her. He wasn’t smiling as he called her over, but then neither was she.
“I was on my way to see you,” he explained. “Something I need to pass on to you.”
Mark was aware of Kim’s withdrawal, but then he didn’t expect anything different. With a beautiful, desirable woman sleeping next to him, Mark had slipped out of bed, tiptoed into the living room, dressed and then left like some kind of thief. Now circumstances were forcing them back together.
No, Mark amended, it wasn’t circumstances. True, he had something to tell her but that could have been accomplished over the phone. He’d taken this early drive back to Camp Oro because leaving her last night had been the hardest thing he’d ever done and, somehow, without telling her enough, he had to make her understand it wasn’t what he’d wanted to do.
He was traveling through uncharted territory this morning. He had no idea what he was doing, or what the outcome might be, and that disturbed the logical, practical lawyer part of him. Still, because his heart was involved, he had no choice. “You’re walking.” The words sounded stupid.
When she said nothing, he tried again. “Have you had breakfast?”
