After all, he asked me to trust him.
“Sam, how about we just move forward. We just keep going like the past never happened. I think that maybe I put a lot of pressure on you when it came to Coop, especially after that Christmas when he nearly died. I was always asking you to take care of him, even when you weren’t there. It was wrong, because Coop was a grown man. I guess I was just hoping you could do something I couldn’t do. Like maybe he’d listen to you more than me. So, let’s move forward.”
Moving forward was the only way, because looking back was too painful.
He twined his fingers with mine. “I like that. Let’s move forward. Come here.”
He shuffled his chair closer and we both leaned in for a kiss.
I loved that he’d never cared where we were; if he wanted to kiss me, he’d kiss me.
We pulled apart and he kissed the top of my nose.
“So this is where you are,” came a voice I didn’t recognize.
We both turned to see a tall, muscular, blond man with a goatee. He wore a leather jacket and ripped jeans.
He looked from Sam to me, then smiled.
Sam tensed beside me and that instantly made me cautious.
“Patrick.” Sam straightened.
“Hey, sorry to interrupt you guys. I was passing through and thought it’d be rude to not say hi.” Patrick smiled. “Hi, I’m Patrick, as you guessed.” He put his hand out to mine and I shook it.
“Olivia, nice to meet you,” I answered, giving my best smile, although I was very aware that Sam wasn’t all that impressed by Patrick’s presence.
“Patrick works with me,” Sam filled in.
“Oh, that’s cool.”
“Very cool. Some of us love our jobs a little too much. Takes up a lot of time, though, but it’s fine if you enjoy it.” Patrick shrugged and flicked his palms over. “Benefits definitely outweigh the cost.” He gave Sam a keen stare as he said that. Like he was trying to make a point.
Or saying something I wasn’t privy to.
“Yes, I agree,” Sam stated, tensing even more. “Sometimes the two are elements that can’t be considered, or used as a comparison.”
Sam’s response definitely made me think even more so that they were talking about something in code.
“I agree with that too.” Patrick snapped his fingers and shifted his weight. “Well, it was good to meet you, Olivia.” Patrick tipped his head at me.
“You too. Good to meet one of Sam’s colleagues.”
“You two enjoy the rest of your meal. Sam, I’m gonna be at the office later if you want to hang.” The look he gave Sam intensified for a split second, then the lightheartedness returned to his eyes.
“Sure. I’ll be there in an hour to finish off my work,” Sam replied.
“Cool, one hour. See you then, my friend.” Patrick gave me one last smile and left us.
As soon as he was out of earshot, I turned to Sam. “Did I get you in trouble at work?” I had to ask.
“No,” he answered, but he was still watching Patrick walk down the path toward the door. It was only when Patrick walked through the door that Sam returned his attention to me.
“It sounded that way, and God, today is Sunday. Is everyone at Stephens so enthusiastic about work?” I understood why Sam was going in. He’d spent a lot of time with me over the last few days, so, sure, I understood that he had work to catch up on and we were wrapping up contracts tomorrow.
But Patrick made it sound like Sam neglected to do something.
“Don’t mind him, he’s always like that. How about we go back to the house, then I’ll drop you home and pick you up later at six.”
I smiled. “We’re going back to your place first?”
He ran a finger over the edge of my jaw. “It’s closer.”
“Closer.”
“Closer, because I need you again.”
“Okay, Sam.”
“Dear Olivia, you’re too sexy for your own good.”
He pressed his lips to mine and erased my worries. I really hoped everything would work out.
Chapter 20
Olivia
9 years ago…
Dear Olivia,
Thank you for being so proud of me. I still can’t believe they made me, of all the people, a lieutenant. I never thought I could be anything like that.
Thank you for believing in me. I feel honored but yesterday I decided to do something that will probably shock a lot of people.
I’m telling you first because you’re my girl.
I’m coming home at the start of the fall. Coming home for good. That’ll make it a little over five years of service.
Most of the guys here are lifers but I think I’ve come to the point where I’m satisfied with what I’ve accomplished and I want to see how far I can go with these new intelligence skills I got.
It’s crazy I did a whole degree while serving and got good grades. That never happened to me before. Rescuing those guys made me think I could do something else. Maybe work for the White House. Nah, I’m just joking. Coop would laugh me to scorn.
Anyway, when I get home I want us to spend more time together. We’ll both be starting new things with you finishing up grad school and it gives us more time together. More time to see what we want to do next.
I realize this is the longest letter I’ve ever wrote you. The food still sucks but now I’m used to it.
I miss your smile just as much as ever, and I can’t wait to see you and start our lives properly.
Just think of it. We can do whatever we want, go wherever we want.
I guess though that since New York is where you’ve always planned to work, that’s where we’ll be going.
I’ll come with you.
I love you beautiful.
See you soon,
Sam
Oh my God.
My skin was on fire, buzzing with life, and my heart was racing.
Joy bubbled within me and I had to read that last part over again.
Sam wanted to go to New York with me? Sam was coming home from the Marines and he wanted us to start our lives together.
I needed to call Jada and tell her all of this. Jesus, my head…
I pulled out one of the chairs from around the breakfast table and sat down before I fell over.
I was finishing up grad school in two months. I’d already started applying to a number of New York firms. I had interviews lined up and I was already excited about that.
Sam, though…
Was I crazy for being more excited about my boyfriend coming home from the Marines and wanting to start a life with me? I’d geared myself up for him to be a Marine for life. He loved it. And while I worried myself sick sometimes, I held onto hope that he’d be okay.
I hoped that, like Coop said, Sam would be like John McClane in the Die Hard films and always find a way out of danger and come back to me.
So far he had. He’d been in some seriously dangerous situations. Things he would never tell me about. But he always came back to me.
Now that I knew he planned to come home officially, I guess I could allow myself the dream of having him home with me. And I guess I could be allowed to be more happy that my boyfriend wanted to take whatever the next steps life had planned for us together.
I could just imagine us in New York.
We’d come so far. And we seriously had to tell Dad and Coop we were together. I felt that the way we’d been had only survived and lasted as long as it did because Sam was away for ninety percent of the year. Last year it was the whole year. He didn’t even get to come home for Christmas. I last saw him two months ago at Easter. Each time he was home it was a max of a week, sometimes less than that.
We’d lived through these letters. We’d lived through these letters so much that it felt like we really did see each other every week.
In real life I’d seen Sam three times a year for the last five years and we made long distance work.
I loved him and I
knew he loved me too.
The kitchen door opened and Coop came in. I wasn’t expecting to see him until Sunday for family dinner.
He looked like he was going out to a party with the way he’d styled his hair and the clothes he wore. But going to a party at ten in the morning? On a Wednesday?
Dad was in the sitting room. He did a half-day on Wednesdays when I was home. He’d leave for work just after lunch, allowing him more time with me. I knew Dad would be happy Coop stopped by.
“Liv.” Coop rushed to me with a wide smile on his face.
The start of a smile tipped the corners of my mouth but disappeared when I saw his eyes. His pupils were dilated, wide like an alien. That was the best way that I could describe it.
He’d been using again. Using drugs. I couldn’t believe it, and definitely not after a few Christmases ago when he nearly died. That had been the worst. He’d been in rehab since and I hoped it helped, but clearly it didn’t if his eyes looked like that.
“Coop, what’s wrong with you?” I straightened up in the chair.
“Whaaaaat, nah, nah, nah nothing. Why would you say that? Today is the best day ever.” He was speaking a little too loud. Loud like he was trying to talk to me over a crowd.
“What happened today?”
“Business. You aren’t going to believe it. I got the best opportunity in this world. Aaawww maaaaan.” He balled his fists and popped his fingers out, bouncing on his feet.
The excitement, the overlyniness and everything about him screamed drugs.
“What’s the business idea?” I asked, deciding to play along.
“Cars. You remember how Sam and me were crazy for cars? He became a Marine and me a big loser? Well that changes today. I’ll be fixing up cars. I just bought a shipment of cars from Japan, Princess Olivia. Whoop, whoop.”
I didn’t think it was possible, but his pupils looked worse. More important was what he was saying to me. Shipment of cars? I didn’t know he had the money for a new car, let alone a shipment. Coop also wasn’t working.
I clutched my chest. “Where’d you get the money for all that?” Normally I’d exhibit more tact, but my tact and keeping quiet over the years nearly lost him.
Me not saying anything when I saw anything suspicious early lost him. I didn’t want to lose my brother. I didn’t want anything to happen to him. Years ago when he took that overdose was close. I didn’t want to live through that again. So if being tactless and challenging him was what it took, then that’s what I’d do.
“Liv, what’d you mean by that? And why you got to say it like that for? Like I stole it.”
“Coop, come on, understand. Of course I would ask; you aren’t working. Where’d you get the money from?” I stood up and moved toward him.
“A guy who wanted to invest in me. He saw my potential and wanted to invest in my business idea.”
That sounded even more suspicious. What person provided an investment for a shipment of cars to someone who wasn’t even in the trade at all? Coop just loved cars. It would be more believable if he was a mechanic or something like that, but Coop hadn’t done anything car related at all.
“What does he want in return?” I pursed my lips together.
“Fuuuuuck! What’s with you?” he screamed at me, his voice so loud it pierced through me and I started shaking.
Coop and I could fight, but he’d never ever spoken to me like that.
“Nothing. I’m just worried about you. Coop, you took something. I know, I can tell.”
He moved over to the granite worktop, picked up the glass cookie jar and threw it at the window. It smashed and so did the window.
“You,” he pointed at me and I jerked away. “You think you’re hot shit just because you’re at Harvard. Harvard, how nice. You must be so proud of yourself, and suddenly you think you’re better than me.”
“I don’t think that, not at all.”
“You aren’t. You’re nothing but a pain-in-the-ass brat who’s been babied her whole life. Dad treats you like a child, Sam humors your stupid crush on him but really he pities you. You don’t know what he’s like, a different woman every night. That’s the man you think of as some hero. He’ll fuck around until his dick falls off.”
Jesus, my heart…
My poor heart. Thank God I knew otherwise about Sam or I would have believed Coop.
“This isn’t you.”
“Fuck off,” he bellowed.
“That’s enough!” Dad cried from the door. He’d been standing there watching. I was so focused on Coop, I didn’t know how long Dad had been standing there.
Coop looked at Dad. Stared at him, stared him down.
“What are you going to say to me, son?” Dad asked. “We love you, and I can see from here that you’re high on something. Let’s go to the center.” Dad put out his hand.
Coop shook his head. “No, I don’t want to. I don’t need to. I have a business now and I’m going to make it work. You guys don’t need to believe in me. I don’t need any of you.”
“Coop,” I attempted, but he held up his hand.
“Olivia, don’t say anything to me.”
“Can I just tell you how much I love you? It’s…good you have a business.”
His face softened just a little, only a little, and he didn’t answer me. He just walked out.
He stepped straight past Dad and walked out.
The front door closed and my insides crumbled. Tears rolled down my cheeks and my chest tightened. Tightened right up.
Dad came up to me and pulled me in for a hug.
“Don’t cry,” he whispered, holding me close. “Don’t cry.”
“What’s going to happen, Dad? What are we going to do? He nearly died four years ago,” I spoke through tears.
“I know, princess. I know. We can’t help him if he doesn’t want help, but I’ll never stop trying. I’ll never stop trying. Even if it kills me.”
“No, Dad, please don’t say that.” I winced and pulled back.
Dad cupped my face. “Princess Olivia, your mother told me two things just before she died. She told me how much she loved me. Loved me and the two of you. Then she asked me to look after her babies. You turned out great, but Coop lost his way. He lost his way and that’s on me. Me protecting everybody else when my own son needed me.”
“It wasn’t like that.”
“It feels that way. To me.” Dad nodded with insistence.
“We can all blame ourselves.” I pulled in a breath. “Dad, there were times when I should have come to you and didn’t. I thought telling on him would make him worse, but what made him worse was my silence. I thought I could help him.”
I spoke to Coop. I told him that time when I saw him in the woods and at least four other times. I threatened to tell Dad. By the last incident it was kind of obvious to everyone. Dad knew Coop had a problem. I figured he knew for a while, but the confirmation was there. That was well before that Christmas. Coop lied and said he’d taken drugs once and once only. Dad knew the lie before he even said it and kept a close eye on him. Didn’t work, though.
“We all thought we could help him. All of us. Sam included. We just had to see what we could do now.”
I wished Sam was here. I really did. He’d know what to do. Coop listened to him. Coop would listen to him. Neither of us knew how to reach Coop the way Sam did.
So…maybe there was more than one good thing about Sam coming home for good. From the way it looked, maybe he was the only one who could save my brother.
Chapter 21
Sam
8 years ago…
I slipped my hands behind Olivia’s head and pressed her lips closer to mine, angling her beautiful face so I could deepen our kiss.
I couldn’t believe she was mine. All mine.
And two days ago she said yes.
She said yes when I asked her to marry me. My girl said yes to me. It was real. We were real and we were getting married.
I’d marry her tonight
if I had my way, but there were a number of things we had to do first. It was right that we did it.
The very first thing was telling Joe and Coop about us. Not just the part that we were together, but all of it. And we were getting married as soon as possible.
“Sam, if we don’t stop, we’re going to be completely naked by the time Coop arrives,” Olivia giggled between kisses.
“I don’t care. I don’t fucking care.” I wanted her all over again, never mind the sheer indulgence we’d had on each other since I got back home a few days ago.
This was my reward. She was my reward for all I’d been through, and I was going to take full advantage. I really was.
I brought her back to my lips, tasting the sweetness of her. Honey. She was like honey. All of her.
The last few months had been hard. It seemed like the damn universe was out to get me. All the time I’d been a Marine and I hadn’t gone through shit like I had in the last eight months. It all started when I saved my men from the terrorist facility.
That was a triumph I’d never forget. Ten men were rescued that day. Three months later, and funny enough, days after I decided I was going to leave, a bomb took out half my crew. Twelve guys gone just like that. The following month there was an attack on the village we were supposed to be protecting and the whole place got wiped out. Everyone gone. Men, women and children. That wasn’t even done by a terrorist group. It was a man who lived in the village who decided he wanted to get back at a rival. Except his plan went wrong and he killed everyone. That was a gas explosion.
A few weeks after that, my captain was shot and killed, along with two other lieutenants. Guys I trained with for the whole time. Captain Andrews was the guy who put me forward for the degree program and put me forward for all sorts of opportunities when he saw my interest in data analysis.
It was one thing after another.
Much as I missed the adventure and the honor of saving people, for me it was time to go. Definitely time to go.
Now that I was home, I felt like a whole new person. A new Sam, holding his fiancée in a new apartment.
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