“I’m sorry, Kay.”
“I’m not,” she replies with a firm nod. When I look at her, she nods again. “I’m really not. You helped me figure it out. He’s a player, through and through. That’s the last thing I need in my life, especially my last year here. Now, talk to me about why you look like someone just took your lunch money.”
“It’s about the Delta I went home with.” Before she breaks into a lecture about choices like any big sister would, I go on. “He’s not a Delta, not in the true douchy sense.”
“What do you mean?”
“He’s a nerd.” I don’t know any other way to say it. “A virgin nerd.”
She blinks at the news. Twice. “That’s not possible. The Deltas only accept douchy dicks into the house. How’d a nerd—a virgin—get in?”
“He’s a legacy.”
“Wow.” She pushes back from the counter before jumping forward again. “Wait. Why’d you go home with a nerd?”
“He’s, uh…” I bite my lip and think of the best way to drop the bomb, one that doesn’t make me sound like just as much of a tool as the one I’m turning Ryan into. “He’s taking me to the DASH.”
“In return for?”
“I turn him into a player.” I hold my breath and brace myself for her reaction. When her eyes flash, I cringe and scramble to explain, to win her over to my side—whatever side that is. “It’s only for a month. And he doesn’t suck. He’s actually kind of cute.” The more I describe him, the more I get lost in the thought of him, of his damn crooked grin. It gets me every time. “And funny. Smart. He’s a quick study, let me tell you. His kisses…” I smile and lick my lips at the memory.
“Emma, what’re you doing? You can’t play with him like he’s a life-sized Ken doll. This is a person.” Kayla takes my hand and shakes her head, giving me one of those “I’m very disappointed in you” looks. It kills me.
I break out of my Ryan trance and clear my throat. “I’m just helping him. That’s all.”
“When the DASH comes and goes? What happens then?”
“It’s over,” I admit and can’t bring myself to smile. The ache deep in my heart robs me of my ability to do anything else, which makes no sense. We’ve only been fake dating for a day. We haven’t even had sex. After discovering he’s a virgin, I don’t know if we will. I don’t want to be the one to take his V card. That’s more than I signed up for.
This is all too much. He’s just another Project Em’s Way. That’s all. Nothing more.
So why does it feel like more?
16
[Ryan]
I pace the length of the mod, anxious and restless as I wait for Emma. Her last class ended over an hour ago. Where is she? As much as I don’t want to believe she’d stand me up, my track record with girls is in the negative.
But Emma isn’t a girl. She’s all woman. Gorgeous. Sexy. Funny as hell. Why she ever agreed to this crazy deal, I’ll never know. Sure, the DASH is considered the party of the year. Every year. It’s still just a party. She doesn’t need it to better her status. She’s already one of the beautiful people.
Maybe that’s why she’s a no-show. She realizes she can easily get into the DASH and doesn’t need me. I drag myself to the couch and collapse. This sucks. For the first time in a long, long time, I was actually looking forward to spending Friday night inside the mod. I wouldn’t be alone, not this time. Yet, I am.
I grab my phone and check the screen. No return texts. Where is she? I’ve already texted her three times. Any more than that and I will have crossed from worried boyfriend to stalker boyfriend.
Speaking of stalker… I open the last text from Bailey and hesitate. At least I think it’s from Bailey. The number doesn’t show, so I can’t be sure. Still, it’s better than sitting here, slowly driving myself insane with worry.
Tell them their advice didn’t work. I wait, watching the screen.
It doesn’t show her typing, but then her reply appears. Then follow mine.
Be myself? No, thank you. I didn’t snag Emma’s attention by being myself. I got it by being a Delta. If I want to keep it, I have to go all the way. The Delta house has a reputation of all the brothers being total players. I need to be one of those players if I have any chance at being more than a fake boyfriend to her. I hate the idea of turning into a complete douche like Brad, but if that’s what she wants, that’s what I’ll do.
Don’t overthink it.
I read the text over and over. How am I overthinking this? Emma wants a Delta dick. I’m a Delta, so I’m halfway there. I just need to be a dick. It goes against everything I’ve work so hard to break free from—my dad’s influence, my brother’s reputation, even my own tendency to ignore the wants of the masses and do my own thing. Delta dicks run in packs. I have to become one of them to be accepted into the herd.
Dude, you’re a Delta. You got this.
That sounds a lot like Jason. I didn’t know this was a group chat. Are Jackson and David on it, as well? Now I wish I’d never sent the original text calling them out. It also makes me wonder if any of the texts are coming from Bailey at all. I feel like an idiot reaching out to a group of strangers for advice on my love life. I don’t know them. I don’t trust them. I set the phone on the coffee table and lean my head back on the couch.
When my phone buzzes, I launch to grab it. It’s either Bailey calling to tell me to ignore the texts or Emma telling me she’s on her way. I don’t even check the number as I answer. “Hello?”
“Stuart Ryan calling for Harold Ryan. May I put him through?”
The breath whistles from my lungs. Shit. I don’t have the energy or focus to deal with my dad right now. “Not really a good—”
“Harold?” Stuart Ryan’s voice comes over the line. At least it sounds like him—almost. There’s something off about his voice, something that has me dropping my guard for another reaction. Concern.
“Dad? What’s wrong?”
“I’ve been trying to reach you for weeks.” The disappointment deadens his tone.
No, your secretary has been trying to reach me for weeks. I clench my teeth until the familiar churning in my gut slows. “I’ve been busy. Why’ve you been trying to reach me?”
“Will you be coming home for break?”
“I hadn’t planned on it. I need to work.”
“No, son. You don’t. I can have money transferred into your account. There’s no reason for you to work at that computer center like some poor college student struggling to survive.”
I chuckle silently until I can control my temper. My dad pushes all my buttons. “That’s what I am.”
“You’re a Ryan.”
“That doesn’t excuse me from having to support myself.”
He sighs and it sounds like it’s a struggle. My anger melts. I’m back to being concerned. “I didn’t call to fight.”
“Why did you call?”
“There’s something I need to speak with you about.” He sighs again, this one even more of a struggle.
“What is it?”
“Not over the phone.”
“Then why’d you call me?” My concern quickly melts into irritation. Who calls with the hint of some sort of bad news, then says he can’t say it over the phone? Stuart Ryan, that’s who. He’ll do anything to get me to agree to come home, even if it’s only for break. Then he’ll be able to tell me what a disappointment I am to my face. I stand to pace. “Jesus, Dad. You can’t call like this and then not tell me why.”
“Just promise me you’ll come home.”
“I already told you—” There’s a click and then three beeps announcing the end of the call. “Hello?” I check my screen. Yep, sure enough. He hung up on me. I raise my phone, ready to hurl it across the room. “That son of a—”
“Easy, cowboy.”
I whip around and drop my jaw at the sight. Emma is standing in my doorway, a Styrofoam container in her hands. She eases in another step.
“Is it safe to enter? Or s
hould I come back later after you assault your phone?”
I set the phone on the counter and let out a shaky breath. Talking with my dad always gets under my skin. Not wanting to burden her with my dysfunctional family dynamics, I change the subject by nodding at the container. “What’s in there?”
“Cheekown,” she says in a weird accent. “Good cheekown.” She drops the accent as she continues. “I stopped by the diner to talk to Kayla. Alfonse sent me home with leftovers.”
My stomach tightens over her choice of words. She called my mod home. It’s a simple word, yet has my insides in turmoil. “That’s why you’re late?”
She sets the container next to my phone. “I didn’t realize I had a curfew.”
“Sorry,” I offer and draw several deep breaths. “Why didn’t you answer any of my texts?”
“You texted me?” She checks her phone and shakes her head. “I don’t have any texts from you.” I grab my phone and show them to her. She frowns as she checks her phone again. “Weird. I didn’t get any of them. Try texting me again.”
I do and wait. Her phone remains silent. I check the number and I’m ready to put my fist through a wall. I transposed the last two digits. “I had the number wrong.”
She takes my phone and corrects it. “There. I’m also adding the number for the diner. If you ever need to reach me, call Alfonse. He’ll find me. He has a knack for that.”
“What? Finding whatever’s been lost?” I immediately think of TREX’s mission statement and repeat what the agents told me this morning. “No matter the circumstances. No matter the danger.”
She looks at me. “Yeah, okay. Whatever. You can be really weird sometimes, you know that?”
“Yes, I know that.” I’m back to wanting to punch something.
“Why do you look like you’re about to put your fist through a wall? It was just an observation.”
I study her intently. Am I that easy to read? “It’s not that. I’m always like this after dealing with my dad.”
“Everything okay?” She pulls her sweater over her head and drapes it across the back of the couch. The static has her hair standing up in all directions, and she doesn’t care. I smile at the sight. My anger melts with every passing second.
“It is now.” It really is. Just seeing her has me calm, centered. I pop open the container and inhale, taking in the smell of stale chicken strips and cold fries. Still, it’s food and I’m starving. “Is any of this for me? Or does that break some boyfriend rule, me eating your food?”
“I brought it for you, dummy. Besides, it’s not like we’re roommates where we have to label all our food or keep everything on designated shelves. I don’t even live here.”
“You did call it home.”
She narrows her gaze. “Don’t make this weird.”
“It’s already weird.” I chuckle.
“You’re not wrong.” She falls to the couch and kicks off her boots. She sure acts like she lives here. I love how comfortable she seems around me. I hope it’s not an act. I grab the food and join her on the couch, where she promptly steals a fry. “You want to talk about it?”
I set the container between us. “Talk about what?”
“What’s got you ready to chip a tooth. Ease up on the jaw, buddy.” She reaches up and wiggles my chin.
I take her hand in mine and hold it as I lower it, never taking my gaze from hers. “I’m glad you’re here.”
She tilts her head as she studies me. “Why wouldn’t I be? What’s going on with you?”
“I just thought…” I drop my gaze, ashamed. I can’t tell her I expected her to ditch me, or how the disappointment over having to spend tonight without her almost crushed me. What kind of person does that make me, always expecting the worst in people? As soon as I realize who it makes me sound like, I’m back to clenching my jaw. That’s exactly the kind of person my dad is. I’m nothing like Stuart Ryan. We share a last name. That’s it.
“You didn’t think I’d come back.”
I jump my gaze to hers as guilt weighs me down. I don’t say anything. If I deny it, I’d be lying. If I tell her the truth, I’ll feel even worse. “Sorry.”
“Don’t be,” she fires back with a soft laugh. God, I love that laugh. I love the throaty hoarseness of her voice. It makes her all that much sexier. “If our roles were reversed, I’d be shitting bricks whenever we’re not together.”
“That’s not really making me feel any better.”
“Which is why,” she continues and steals another fry, “we’ll be spending every available minute together. We have a lot of ground to cover between now and the DASH. If we’re going to do this, we both need to be all in. Got it?”
I nod quickly. Every available minute together? Like I’m going to argue with that.
17
TREX HQ
Bailey drummed her fingers on the desk in the hotel room, taking her time tapping each nail on the hard surface. It shouldn’t be this hard. Three tests. One, two, three. Having Ryan pass the first test had given her hope. He didn’t ask questions. He simply followed the instructions like a good soldier.
It was how fast he blew through the second test that gave her pause. He was more advanced than she’d given him credit for. The third test wouldn’t even be a challenge for him. She’d worked too hard combing through student profiles and exam results, picking out the best of the best, to make it easy to get into the internship program.
Would every potential recruit beat her tests so fast? Would every one of them make her feel like she’d somehow failed in designing them? She didn’t know how to recognize a spoofed IP until she’d joined TREX and her sister had shown her what to look for. Charis McKoy—strike that, she’d been Charis Snyder for two years now—was the smartest person Bailey knew.
She opened her laptop and clicked on TREX’s secure com link app. If anyone knew how to make the third test a challenge for someone as smart as Harold Bartholomew Francis Ryan, it was Charis.
Charis’ pretty eyes lit up when she smiled into the web cam. “Hey, Bails.”
“Hey.” Bailey didn’t feel much like smiling.
Charis lost hers. “What’s wrong?”
“This is a lot harder than I thought it would be.” She didn’t bother sugarcoating it. She never did when it came to her big sister. It would have been a waste of time anyway. Charis would have picked up on in right away.
“How many prospective recruits do you have so far?”
“Two.”
“Tell me about them.” She sat down and looked like she had something in her hand. A pen and paper, no doubt. “Start with the one giving you the most trouble.”
Bailey pulled up their files. “That would be Harold Ryan. He’s smart, Charis. Really smart.”
“You got all that after two tests?”
“You talked to your husband.” It didn’t surprise her. After unshared intel led to a trap that nearly killed them both on a find, those two shared everything.
“David gave me the Cliff Notes version. He also said something about Jackson Banks kissing you in front of Jason. Is there something you want to tell me, little sis? How’s your twin feel about that? Are you into the lifestyle like Kaylee?”
“No.” She was curious, but not enough to ask Jason to share her with another man. He’d made it no secret he shared women with his brother—until Jeremy found Breanne. Now they were each a solo act. Jackson, on the other hand, not only shared his women, he also had a solid reputation as a bona fide Dom throughout the agency. TREX had used him on more than one occasion to infiltrate a BDSM club on a find. He and Kaylee paired up from time to time—in every sense of the term. “He was just making a point.”
“With his lips, apparently.”
“It was a really good point.” And wasn’t that bad of a kiss. A kiss she couldn’t forget, which ended up sending Jason into a jealous rage that even had David a little worried for Jackson. “I didn’t call you to talk about my disaster of a love life. I need your he
lp on this third test for Ryan.”
“David told me about the first two,” she said, shaking her head. “They were way too easy. Bails, you’ve got to make it worth their while or they’re going to stop trying.”
“I thought I had.”
She rolled her eyes, destroying Bailey a little more. She hated to disappoint her big sister. “You’re a gamer, right?”
“I’m a LARPer,” she corrected. Live Action Role Playing was the only fun she had anymore.
“My point is, things don’t come easily in games. You have to break through several levels to get to the boss. It’s no different than hacking. It’s no fun if it’s too easy. Treat it like a hack. Make the third test unhackable, like TREX’s system.”
“Oh, you mean the system that got hacked a year ago?”
“We didn’t get hacked,” Charis corrected sternly. “A tech inadvertently uploaded a virus that brought down our firewall. And that’s not my point. This guy is a gamer. A computer engineer. Stop giving him things he already knows.”
“I don’t know what else to give him.” She hated to admit it. She was a computer engineer, too. What she knew, he knew tenfold.
Instead of Charis judging her, she hummed in the back of her throat and smiled. That sound only meant one thing. She already knew how to get the upper hand. “I do. Do you have a jock on your list?”
Bailey nodded and pulled up the file. “A senior by the name of Jake Swanson. He’s a cadet with the Bainbridge Island Fire Department.”
“Perfect. Swap their final tests.”
No way could she have heard her right. Ryan wouldn’t be able to do the field work, and no way would Swanson be able to crack code. “Did you say swap them?”
“Yes. Jason came up with the jock’s three tests, right? Since Jason is a field agent, his tests are going to be what a field agent needs to beat. Same with you. You’re an intel agent. Your tests are designed to assess the strengths of another intel agent. Swap them. Don’t pigeonhole them. Just because this Harold Ryan is ridiculously good at computers doesn’t mean he won’t kick ass in the field.”
Reluctant Hero (TREX Rookies Book 1) Page 13
