by Rachel Dylan
Caleb clenched his fists as his anger at this man grew with each word that came out of Annie’s mouth.
“After a few minutes, he busted down the door and came toward me. I told him to stop and he didn’t. That’s when I shot him in the leg.”
“You had every right to defend yourself, Annie.”
“That’s what I thought, too. And I didn’t try to kill him. I was no gun expert, but I tried to aim for his leg thinking that would be better than anything else. I was just trying to stop him from hurting me. That’s all I was trying to do.”
“What happened to him?”
“He survived. He lost a bit of blood but there was a lasting effect—he walks with a severe limp because of me.”
“And the police?” He hated to ask. He was starting to put the pieces together, and he had a pretty good idea where this was going.
“I thought they would be on my side. Up to that point in my life, I assumed that police helped the innocent. I was a young girl being attacked by a criminal. But they took his side. I underwent hours of interrogation. They tried to get me to change my story. Tried to get me to say that I was the aggressor. They didn’t buy my self-defense claim.”
“Did they charge you?”
“No. Thankfully, in the end, another detective was brought onto the case, and he believed me enough to keep the charges from sticking.”
“Dirty cops,” Caleb muttered to himself.
“Exactly. My mom’s boyfriend had friends who had some pretty important criminal connections. Looking back it’s all so clear now. But at the time, as a seventeen year old girl, my life felt like it was falling apart. I didn’t understand why they didn’t believe me.” She sucked in a breath. “I was telling the truth.”
“I believe you.”
“You do? Just like that?”
“I know we haven’t known each other that long, but I can see you’re telling me the truth.”
“So you can see why, even though I realize there’s no connection to those police in Florida and the ones here, I don’t know that I’ll ever get over that. It’s one of the reasons I left Florida. I wanted to get away from that man. I feared he would come after me again, given what I did to him, because he is permanently injured. He’s not the type of man to forget and move on.”
“Did he threaten you?”
“Yes, multiple times. But soon after that day, I graduated and turned eighteen. I left the state. I went to culinary school, and I had no intention to ever go back there again. Especially after my mom’s death.”
“Do you still think he’s looking for you?”
“It’s not a risk I’m willing to take. He’s a really bad guy.”
“But you acted in self defense.”
“I know that, but he didn’t exactly see it that way. He was so strung out, he didn’t remember everything. That’s why he was able to spin this totally separate story to the cops. He concocted a pure fiction that I had been the one drinking and he had tried to get me under control and stop me. And that’s why I shot him.” She paused. “I could work at larger restaurants and have been scouted a few times, but it's not worth the risk. So that’s one of the reasons I prefer to work as a private chef.”
“You want to make sure that he won’t ever be able to track you down. If you were ever in the limelight because of your work in a restaurant, then you fear that he could get to you?”
She nodded. “See, I told you I was a mess.”
“You shouldn’t have to limit your career options because of this criminal.”
The longer Annie talked about this man, the more upset Caleb became. This guy had thrown her entire life off track.
“Maybe we should worry about one problem at a time. Right now Silva is my problem. But you get a better picture of my past and my hang-ups when it comes to law enforcement.”
“What happened to you is awful. But I promise you that most police officers are honest.” And he believed that with all of his heart. He worked with so many noble and loyal officers.
“And I know that from a logical standpoint, but it still makes trusting very hard. Even trusting you. But you’ve not given me any choice.” She gave him a faint smile.
“I’m not going to let you down, Annie. That I promise you.” And he meant every word.
Annie wasn’t the only one with nightmares from the past. Listening to hers only lifted his more to the surface. The fact that he’d let down his friend in Afghanistan when his SEAL teammate had needed him the most. But there was no way he was going to let history repeat itself with Annie.
**
Caleb lay in his bed, but sleep just wasn’t happening. His mind was working overtime. He had committed to protect Annie, but there were many more questions than answers. Her story about what had happened in Florida sickened him. He became a police officer to serve and protect. After his time in the military and being a Navy SEAL, he knew he still wanted to do something for the greater good. And that’s why he’d chosen to go into law enforcement. Serving a greater purpose was part of his DNA.
That those police in Florida were in criminals’ back pockets instead of protecting an innocent seventeen year old girl was unfathomable to him. It was amazing that Annie was so resilient. Given all she had been through, a lot of people would’ve never been able to live productive lives. Between her difficult upbringing with her mom and then having to defend herself like that against a violent man. And who knows how many other horror stories she probably had relating to her time growing up.
He knew he had a problem with trying to fix people. His urge to help fix people and their problems came naturally, but was only compounded by what had happened in the war—when he tried his hardest and couldn’t help the teammate who needed him the most.
But in this instance, he wasn’t trying to fix Annie. She was perfect just the way she was. He did feel a fierce need to protect her though. And the fact that he was having those types of thoughts scared him. He was developing feelings for this woman, and that was something he simply hadn’t allowed himself to do in years.
Why her out of all the women in the world? A woman who couldn’t stand people in law enforcement—and rightfully so, after what she’d been subjected to.
To be able to keep Annie safe he needed to understand all the threats that she faced. His police instincts just told him that there was something more going on with the Silva situation. But he didn’t know what he was missing. It bothered him that something still seemed off. Generally, his instincts regarding his investigations were spot on. But there was this nagging feeling that made him think he had to dig deeper. He was missing something.
A loud piercing scream had him shooting up out of the bed, grabbing his gun from his nightstand, and running down the hallway to Annie’s room. He prayed that he wouldn’t be too late.
He pushed opened the door, flipped on the light, his gun drawn and ready to take out the perpetrator, his heart beating rapidly. But the room was empty except for Annie who was sitting up in the bed with the purple blanket wrapped tightly around her.
“Annie,” he said. “Are you all right?”
“Yes, I’m sorry to wake you. I guess I was just having an awful nightmare. It was so bad it woke me up.”
He let out a huge sigh of relief and walked closer to the bed. Nightmares he could handle. Buddy and Bailey also joined them in the room, and Buddy jumped up on the bed with Annie. He’d noticed that his lab had fallen in love with her.
“Sorry, Annie. Buddy, get down,” he commanded.
“No,” she said quickly. “Please let him stay up here with me and keep me company.”
It warmed his heart that Annie apparently had the same love of dogs that he did. “Is there anything I can get you? Maybe some water?”
She shook her head. “No. I’ll be fine. I’m sorry to have woken you.”
He watched as she stroked Buddy’s back. Buddy looked perfectly content with Annie by his side. “Don’t apologize. You’ve experienced a lot over the pas
t few days. It’s totally natural that you’d have nightmares.”
“Thanks. I think it’s all starting to catch up to me. Especially after we talked about my past earlier. It’s common for me to have nightmares when that is on my mind. It’s not something I have ever really discussed with anyone. As you can imagine, it’s a difficult subject to bring up. No one wants to admit that they shot someone and were then wrongfully accused.”
“But remember that you weren’t in the wrong.” He thought for a moment. “Do you want to talk for a bit?” He actually wanted her to say yes. Maybe it was him who needed to talk.
“I’ll be fine here with my canine bodyguard.” She patted Buddy on the head. “I don’t want to interrupt your sleep any more than I have.”
He shook his head. “You aren’t interrupting anything.”
“You must think I’m a total disaster.”
He shook his head. “Not at all. I think you’re going through a really rough patch right now. And if you were unfazed by all of this, I’d think there was something wrong with you.”
“Times like this really push me to rely on my faith in the Lord.”
“I can totally relate to that feeling.” Knowing that they shared the same faith only made him more drawn to her.
“I know God has a plan, but sometimes it’s not clear to me what it is or how it’s going to work out.”
“God is always in control. Even when it seems like He’s not.” Since she’d opened up to him, he thought he should do the same with her. At least a little bit. “I will tell you there were some dark times I faced when I was deployed. Some of the things I witnessed and endured. And there were some points when I wondered how God could let something so awful happen.” He paused for a moment to collect himself. He wasn’t going to talk about everything that he had experienced during the war in the mountains of Afghanistan, while chasing down terrorists. It was too hard to speak to anyone about.
“I can’t even begin to comprehend what you went through when you were deployed.”
He shook his head. “I wasn’t telling you this to get your sympathy, but to let you know that I have issues, too. You’re not alone in that, Annie. It’s just that sometimes our baggage takes different forms”
“But you’re so strong.”
“It maybe appear that way now, but I’ve gone through some rough spots. Times when I was caught up in my own fear instead of turning it all over to God. When I came back from my last deployment three years ago, I was in a dark place.”
“How did you get through it?”
He barely did. But he was trying to be more optimistic right now to help her see that there was a path out of this situation. The last thing he wanted to do was to bring her down. “When I realized that the only way I found courage was through faith in God, I regained peace. It was a slow process of building my faith in the context of everything I’d gone through. But that process made me much closer to God and forced me to rely on Him. Because when I was trying to shoulder it all by myself, I was failing miserably.”
“That’s powerful to hear how God has worked through your life in such a profound way. I probably wouldn’t even be here today if it wasn’t for my faith. My mom had a lot of flaws, but the one thing she did do is make sure I went to church. I’d often go by myself because she couldn’t or wouldn’t go. But she insisted that I needed to. She said that it would help lead me down a different path than her. I didn’t get it when I was young, but as I grew older and stronger in my faith, I understood. So I’m thankful that in that one most important area, she got it right.”
“Yes, she did.”
“Thanks for listening.”
“With His help we’re going to get through all of this.”
Chapter Five
The next two days went by slowly. Gabby hovered over Annie like a mama lion during the day while Caleb was working. Annie was always relieved when Caleb came home because he gave her more space than his sister. Gabby’s constant state of high alert was starting to make Annie incredibly anxious. She was appreciative that Gabby cared so much, but it was all taking its toll on her.
Even though she’d spent a lot of time with Gabby, she wasn’t really getting to know her. Gabby was all business, so that mostly left Annie to her own thoughts.
Annie still couldn’t believe that she had opened up to Caleb. Even now at twenty-eight years old, the events of her past gripped onto her heart threatening to squeeze it into pieces. This wasn’t about what was the most logical or rational—it was about her deep seeded fears.
Sometimes she felt herself recede into that seventeen year old girl who had been betrayed by those who were supposed to protect her. And that didn’t even begin to touch the surface on all of the unresolved issues she had because of her mother. There was no doubt in her mind that she was damaged. That’s why it was so much easier to not let anyone get close. When she was cooking she wasn’t living in the past and could focus on her true passion—food.
She’d stayed away from romantic relationships because she had a distrust of men. She wasn’t willing to take the plunge on a guy because she feared that she’d turn out just like her mother—codependent and struggling. It occurred to Annie that she had never seen her mother truly happy. Even with the various men in her life, she was lonely and miserable. Annie wouldn’t live like that.
She sat at the kitchen table with a cup of tea and her now trusty sidekick Buddy close by. She had to admit that she had started to form an attachment to him. Something she specifically did not want to allow herself to do. But as he looked up at her with those big, kind brown eyes, how could she not feel a connection with the pup? And she had a strong feeling that, unlike humans, Buddy wouldn’t ever let her down. Caleb and Gabby had just made the security handoff. And she was glad she could relax a little now that Caleb was home.
Caleb walked into the kitchen carrying grocery bags and smiled when he made eye contact with her.
“How was your day?” He set the bags down on the counter.
“Fine,” she responded quickly.
“That doesn’t sound like everything is fine.”
“We need to talk about things. I can’t just stay locked up here in your house day in and day out under Gabby’s protective detail. I know she means well, but it only makes me more nervous. And I can’t do anything I would normally do.” She hadn’t intended to unload on him, but once she’d started, it all came pouring out.
He nodded. “I realize that this isn’t a long term solution to our problems.”
“Isn’t it really my problem, not yours?” She realized she was pushing him away, but she couldn’t help it.
He walked over to where she sat and gently placed his hand on her shoulder. “No. It’s my problem, too. This is my town. And even if it wasn’t my town, I care about you, Annie.”
Hearing his words touched her, but it also made her a bit worried. She wanted to believe that all of his intentions were good, but what if she were wrong?
“You’re thinking something,” he said.
“It’s nothing.” She couldn’t say that she was confused about how she felt about him.
“Are you hungry? I bought some steaks. I thought we could grill on the back porch. At least that way you’re getting some time outside.”
“I have to tell you that grilling is not my area of expertise. I’m much better with a stove or oven.” Yeah, she could throw steaks on a grill, but she held herself to such a high culinary standard.
“Well, it just so happens that I am a grilling expert. In fact, grilling is about the only thing I can do when it comes to cooking. But I do it very well if I do say so myself.” He laughed. “So just sit back on the porch and relax with the dogs. I’ll do all the work. It’s a marvelous early spring day out there. Not too hot and humid yet.”
She agreed because she wanted to have the time outside.
Later, she had cleaned her plate and settled into a chair on the back porch. The dogs had worn themselves out playing with thei
r ball and Frisbee in the yard, and she let them back inside to rest and get some water. Caleb, true to his word, had been right at home in front of the grill.
He leaned forward in his chair. “So, be honest. I know you’re the professional chef. How did I do on the steaks?”
She smiled. “It was delicious.”
“And you’re not just saying that to be polite?” he asked with a raised eyebrow.
She laughed. “No. I can’t hide my feelings about food. I’m known to be a tough critic. And the fact that I ate all of it should tell you something.”
“It’s nice to hear you laugh.”
“We haven’t had much of an opportunity for things to laugh at.”
“I know. But remember you aren’t going through this alone, Annie. I’m right here.”
“I know.”
As she looked into his blue eyes, she felt a yearning for a deeper connection with him. But it was foolish to think that she would ever be able to open her heart to a man—especially one in law enforcement. There were just too many reasons why it couldn’t—shouldn’t—happen. The last thing she wanted to do was end up like her mother. It was much easier to just focus on her career and her independence. Her financial security. Knowing that she didn’t have to rely on anyone—including a man—for anything. If she started to go down a different path, she couldn’t guarantee those things. It was a risk she didn’t think she could take.
“I realize you have every reason in the world not to trust me. But I want to earn your trust, Annie.”
“This isn’t about you, Caleb. I’m the one with issues. You shouldn’t have to deal with my baggage. You don’t deserve that. You have your own life to attend to.”
He reached out and grabbed onto her hand. “But that’s the thing, Annie. I find myself really enjoying the time we have together.”
She sucked in a breath, trying to formulate her answer. But before she could respond, a loud pop burst through the silent evening. The next thing she knew, Caleb had pushed her down on the porch floor, covering her body with his own. She heard the dogs barking loudly from inside the house. Her heart pounded as fear tore through her. This was it. She could die right now. They both could die.
