Slowly, Braxton brings himself upright from his crouch so as to not disturb the creature. The bird turns its head so that it’s looking right at him. A shiver creeps down his spine. “Who are you?” he whispers.
As if to not torment him anymore, a familiar yellow glow appears, causing Braxton to scurry backward as the falcon hops from his arm onto the ground. Once again, he watches in amazement as the falcon shifts into a boy and then a man—but it isn’t the same man he’d met in the woods. No, this person is older . . . much older. Salt and pepper hair. Strong jawline. Thin lips. And eyes the same icy blue as his own.
Braxton jolts backward and sucks in a breath as if he’d just had the wind knocked out of him.
His father, Darius Tymond, stands before him.
Braxton’s initial shock is quickly replaced with anger. His eyes narrow and his jaw clenches. Normally, he would speak, but he keeps his mouth shut. This man, his so-called father, doesn’t deserve his words, his breath. So he remains silent, waiting to be spoken to.
Darius slowly lifts his gaze from the ground, cold eyes meeting his own. His lips part to speak.
“Failure.”
His words sting.
“Disappointment.”
Braxton balls his hands into fists.
“Disgrace.”
That last one is enough to make him lunge toward his father, all the pent-up rage from years of hatred pulsing throughout his body. He cries out as he’s about to pin his father to the ground, but finds himself falling alone onto the dirt into a light gray mist.
When the haze finally settles, he finds none other than Xerin Grey standing before him. With crossed arms and narrowed eyes, Braxton can tell he isn’t happy.
Xerin whistles in disbelief. “I knew it,” he mutters with a shake of his head. “I don’t know why I never trust my instincts. They’re always dead-on.”
Braxton regards him with wide eyes as what just happened sinks in. His father was never here. It was all an illusion. And now this stranger knows his deepest, darkest secret.
Who he is.
“What the hell was that?” Braxton hisses.
“Why don’t you tell me, Prince Tymond?”
His words knock Braxton back on his elbows. They ring unpleasantly in his ears. “This stays between you and me, you hear?”
Xerin chuckles as he shakes his head. “Your identity is the least of my worries. Trust me.”
Braxton studies him for a moment. If he doesn’t care who I am, then what does he want?
“Back at the inn, you said you knew who I was.” The words linger in the air as Xerin adjusts his stance. “So? Who am I?”
Braxton hesitates, unsure whether or not this is a trick question. “You’re . . . illusié.”
A wide grin stretches across Xerin’s face. “Ding, ding, ding, we have a winner.”
Braxton looses a breath, feeling relieved at his reaction. But his relief morphs back into panic when Xerin says, “And so are you.”
Realizing he’s still on the ground, Braxton pushes himself up and dusts the dirt from his pants. He looks at Xerin and casually shrugs his shoulders. “I don’t know what you’re talking about.”
Xerin rolls his eyes. “You’re really going to try to pull that?”
Braxton considers it, but decides against it. “No, I suppose not.”
“You’re Prince Braxton Tymond of Trendalath, son of King Darius Tymond and Queen Aldreda Tymond. You fled the kingdom seven years ago because your father banished illusié.” Xerin gives him a sideways smile. “How am I doing so far?”
It takes everything in Braxton to maintain eye contact. “But how . . .?”
“I told you I came to recruit you. Don’t you remember?”
Oh. Braxton stumbles backward and leans into a nearby tree for support. “ That means you’re . . . you’re . . .”
“Yes, you’re so close,” Xerin taunts. “Come on, spit it out.”
“Caldari.”
The weight in the air seems to grow heavier and heavier, as if anvils were dropping from the sky.
“Correct you are,” Xerin says with a wink. “I am a member of the Caldari, so that just leaves us with one piece of unfinished business.”
Braxton’s breath catches. “Which is?”
Xerin takes a step closer to him. He rolls his neck and then cracks his knuckles, one finger at a time. “Will you or will you not be joining us?”
ARDEN ELIRI
I FIND MYSELF sprinting faster than I ever thought possible. My feet hit the ground, one after the other, with each stride I take, my arms pumping at my sides. I take a quick glance behind me, making sure that Estelle and Felix aren’t following me.
No sign of them.
I continue to run through the Thering Forest, away from Orihia, away from the truth. They know my secret, and lords only know what they plan to do with it.
I reach a familiar cliffside; the one Estelle had brought me to. The one where I’d dumped the Soames’s heads. I come to a screeching halt as a pebble catapults over the edge into the abyss. I need to think. I need to let everything soak in.
And I need to do it alone.
I take a seat, allowing my legs to dangle over the cliff. It’s a long, long way down. I scoot back a little so that my knees are aligned with the edge.
Dawn is just breaking and the view is breathtaking. Yellows, oranges, and whites light up the lower part of the sky, but the top remains dark as night. It’s one of my favorite parts of the day, although it only lasts for a few moments. Eventually, the sun carries on with its inevitable rise, illuminating the entire sky with its vibrant hello.
My gaze travels to the uppermost part of the sky, and I block out the bright colors below. The darkness is what I’m drawn to, what I’ve always been drawn to. It’s an integral part of me, like the beating of my heart or the air I breathe. It’s terrifying and disturbing, yet intriguing and indispensable.
It is all that is me.
Trying to explain that to another person? Impossible, stupid, and downright foolish. No one will ever truly understand, nor do I want them to. I’m not here to be understood. I’m here to be unapologetically myself, the good and bad parts of me.
My eyes lower as the sun’s greeting fills the dark spots in the sky. Lightness always overcomes darkness. It’s an absolute. So what does that say about me?
I shake my head, pulling myself from the farthest reaches of my mind and clear out every single solitary thought. I sit in silence, staring at the opaque sun as it rises into the morning sky. Goodbye, night. Goodbye, darkness.
We’ll meet again soon.
If I had to guess, I’ve probably been sitting here for an hour or so, when I hear footsteps approaching. Instead of jumping up to hide behind a tree or large rock, I remain seated, still as stone. It’s taken me a long time to accept myself for who I am, and it’s something I’m still working on, so if Estelle and Felix don’t accept it right away, that’s understandable. I get it.
I just wish they’d leave me be.
“Arden, there you are!” Estelle gushes as she runs toward me. In her arms, she holds Juniper, who looks both frightened and relieved to see me.
“Are you okay?”
I nod my head, but stay quiet.
I hear another set of footsteps, heavier than Estelle’s, and it’s obvious that they belong to Felix. If anything, I was sort of hoping that Estelle would show up alone. Wishful thinking, indeed.
Estelle takes a seat beside me and, just as I suspected, Felix appears next to her. He doesn’t say anything, just throws his legs over the edge of the cliff, until Estelle nudges him.
“Felix has something he needs to say.” I can’t see her face, but I’m sure she’s giving him a pointed stare.
“I’m sorry,” he mumbles.
His apology is barely audible, so I decide to make him work for it. “What was that, Felix? I couldn’t hear you.”
Estelle stif
les a laugh.
He glares at her, then back at me. “I said I’m sorry. I was caught up in the moment and shouldn’t have said the things I did.”
“Oh, what? You mean the part where you said you were wrong about me? And how I’m not ‘one’ of you?”
He lets out a long sigh. “I reacted based on my emotions which, at the time, were full of confusion. You have to understand, I’ve always been able to amplify fear in others.” He shrugs his shoulders. “But not with you. That was a strange and uncanny experience for me.”
I loose a breath, relieved that he doesn’t think I’m some psychotic, cold-blooded killer, even though—technically—I suppose I am. “Felix, I’m an assassin. All I’ve known my whole life is killing. I can thank King Tymond for that.” I sigh. “When you’re forced to do something long enough, it only makes sense to adjust and to learn to enjoy it.”
Estelle turns her gaze from Felix to me. “Okay, well seeing as that’s slightly morbid, I’m going to end this conversation right here.” Juniper hops from her lap as Estelle pops up from where she’s sitting and extends her hand to me. “Come on, get up.”
I take her hand and stand up at the same time Felix does. “Where are we going?”
Estelle winks at me. “Back to Orihia.”
Felix starts to open his mouth in protest, but one look from Estelle silences him.
“I’m not so sure that’s a good idea,” I say. I lower my gaze to the ground. A part of me hopes she’ll just agree with me and let me go in peace, but another part of me has a stronger pull, and it desperately wants to go with them. Besides, where else would I go?
“You’re coming with us,” Estelle says, her voice harsh, “and that’s the last I’ll hear of it. Understood?”
I nod my head, happy to hear that she hasn’t changed her mind. Unfortunately, it appears Felix doesn’t seem to feel the same way.
As she turns to head back into the Thering Forest, I make sure to follow closely behind her. I don’t turn around, even though I can distinctly feel Felix’s fiery gaze searing a hole into the back of my head.
When we arrive in Orihia, it’s nearly sundown. I don’t remember the journey taking this long last time, but then again, those travels were broken up with bouts of unconscious spells and confusing memories. Hell, I was probably either knocked out or asleep half of the time, if not more.
I follow Estelle back into the depths of the tree village and into a small hut. Its appearance is certainly deceiving. On the outside, it looks like a standard hut made out of the usual materials: clay, straw, hay; but on the inside, the walls are made of stone and the living space is as up to date and modern as my chambers in Trendalath castle. Albeit it’s not as large as the rooms in the castle, it’s surprisingly spacious. Estelle removes her cloak and throws it on a nearby chair that’s positioned next to a cozy fire, then kicks off her boots. She falls into the leather and lets out a loud sigh, her eyes trained on the orange embers.
Felix removes his satchel and sets it by the door before taking a seat at a wooden table. He checks a couple of canisters for wine, slamming down the empty ones, until he finally picks one up that’s full. I can hear the liquid sloshing around in the metal container as he pours it into a goblet. He lifts the glass and says cheers to the open window before taking a giant gulp.
Feeling uncomfortable and wholly out of place, I remove my boots and make my way over to an empty chair across from Estelle. She doesn’t seem to notice my arrival, so I close my eyes and let the events of the day soak in. The fire feels warm and soothing on my face and it’s enough to make me want to fall asleep. It’s been a while since I’ve had a proper night’s rest.
I open one eye and steal a look at Estelle. Her eyes are now closed, and it appears she’s in the beginning phases of drifting off into a peaceful sleep. I shift my gaze to Felix, who is now facedown on the table, goblet in hand.
Just as I’m about to drift off to sleep, something catches my eye in the corner of the room. I quietly lift myself up off the chair and tiptoe over to the draped piece of furniture. It’s tall and rectangular and I’m almost positive I know what it is. I slip the drape off the mysterious object, trying not to cough as a cloud of dust bounces from the fabric into the air around me. I smile as the object is revealed.
It’s a bookcase. And behind that is . . .
Another, and another, and another.
I’m almost certain my eyes deceive me as I lean to the side, counting how many bookcases they’ve seemed to stash in this hut. I count twelve, but it’s possible there are more hidden somewhere. I turn back around to check on Estelle and Felix—who are both now snoring—before facing the bookcases again.
I can’t help but feel even more astonished at the size of this hut. Before I slipped the drape off the first one, it appeared that a single bookcase sat against a single wall. But as soon as I uncovered it, almost a dozen more seemed to appear out of nowhere, the room stretching on for miles. Yes, this hut is quite deceiving to the naked eye and it makes me wonder what other secrets are hidden here.
I grab a lantern off the table Felix is now drooling on and make my way through the aisles of shelves. I hold the lantern up to each row, hoping to get a better view of the titles. I almost drop the lantern as my eyes skim across the first row, then the second. Every single book pertains to illusié.
Which means I’m in the presence of Tymond’s entire banned book collection.
The realization is almost enough to make me squeal with delight as I run my fingers over the worn spines. I pick one at random, then replace it as another more intriguing title catches my eye. How am I going to read all of these?
There isn’t enough time.
I can’t even begin to fathom how much knowledge surrounds me, how many questions I can easily have answered, how much trouble this could potentially cause for Tymond if the public finds out. That last thought makes me giddy, and I can feel my heart pick up pace as I set the lantern down and lower myself to the floor. I flip open the book I’d chosen and begin to read as fast as I can, trying to absorb as much information as humanly possible. The pages feel old and worn against my fingertips. I feel so privileged. Elated. All the secrets of the illusié and the Caldari are here, in this room. I am in the presence of everything.
It’s enough to make my head spin.
Just as I’m getting to the good stuff, I hear someone stir. I slam the book shut and return it to its proper place on the shelf. I silently hope that it’s Estelle who’s stirred and not Felix, but my optimism fades as I hear heavy footsteps approaching the bookshelves. There’s no use in hiding, seeing as they’re already uncovered. I stand still, waiting for him to appear.
He finishes checking the second aisle, finally coming to the one I’m standing in. I raise the lantern so I can see his face more clearly. He holds his hand up to cover his eyes, his voice groggy. “What are you doing back here?”
I shrug. “I like to read.”
Felix stifles a yawn before saying, “You shouldn’t be back here.” He grabs my hand and leads me to the front of the hut. I watch despondently as he throws the black drape back over the bookshelf, returning the hut to its original size. Personally, I don’t know why they cover those shelves. It adds a certain zest to the room, having all those books out in the open like that; but seeing as they’re banned books, I suppose I can understand why they have them hidden.
“Can I ask you a question?”
Felix smiles. “You just did.”
I roll my eyes. “Seriously. Where did you get all of those books? You’re aware that King Tymond banned them, right?”
Felix nods his head. “It wasn’t easy, but we couldn’t allow our entire history to be reduced to mere ashes and dust. Especially when we’re discovering so many newcomers, brothers and sisters, like you.”
I stick my lower lip out in a pout. “Then why did you pull me away? I have so much to learn. You said so yourself.”
Felix si
ts down at the table and pours himself another drink. I can tell by the way he sets the goblet down that he doesn’t want to answer my question. “After what we experienced earlier . . .” He trails off, but I know exactly what he means.
I sit down next to him and look him in the eye. He shifts uncomfortably but holds my gaze. “You can trust me,” I tell him. “You weren’t wrong about me. I am one of you. Whether you want me to be or not, I know I am.”
Felix taps his fingers against the table before taking another drink. With the goblet in one hand, he says, “You’re right. But that doesn’t excuse what happened earlier. We need to sort through your . . .,” he struggles to find the right word, “desires. We’ve been plagued by darkness for too long and I’ll be damned if we let it back in.”
I know he doesn’t mean me, but I still cringe. I am darkness. My thoughts from earlier repeat in my head: It’s all I know. I don’t dare say that aloud though, not at a time like this.
He stares at me for a few minutes before glancing over at Estelle. “We should probably wake her.”
I follow his gaze. “Nah, let her sleep.”
Out of nowhere, a click-clack and wing flaps fill the room. Felix and I both jump from our seats, our eyes flitting to the source of the noise. There, on the windowsill, is a black falcon.
My hand flies to my chest. I can feel my heart thumping at double its normal speed. “Holy lords, that scared me half to death,” I say. I look at Felix, but he doesn’t seem all that surprised.
He turns to look at me and gives me a crooked grin. “Yeah, we definitely need to wake Estelle for this.”
RYDAN HELSTROM
RYDAN SITS IMPATIENTLY in his cell, his knuckles turning white from gripping the iron bars. It feels as though it’s been days since he last saw Elvira, and not knowing whether or not she’s okay is really starting to eat away at him. He keeps his eyes trained on the dimly lit stairwell, hoping and waiting for a flicker of a lantern. Somehow, he’d missed his last meal, so not only is he hungry, but also concerned for his newfound friend’s well being.
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