“You can tell old Dennis,” Malatesta said, “that if I wasn’t a regular in here for a lot of years, and got to like the guy against my better judgment, he might’ve had a lot of time to think about what he likes to eat, back when his joint on Route Twenty went up about seven years ago. Might’ve gotten to liking olives.”
“I don’t think I’ll tell him that,” the bartender said. He straightened up. “You want to tell him that, you tell him that. You and him’re in charge of that matter. I’ll just get you your drink and your nuts.”
The bartender returned with Malatesta’s order. He resumed reading. He ate an olive.
“Jesus Christ,” Malatesta said. “What the fuck is she doing in that ladies’ room? She look sick or something when she went in?”
“She did, I didn’t notice it,” the bartender said. “You know something?” He turned the magazine around so that Malatesta could read it. “That Cheryl Tiegs there, she is one fine-lookin’ broad. I had a crack at her, I might forget about the olives.”
“Yeah,” Malatesta said. “How long’s she been in there?”
“Marion?” the bartender said. “Dunno. Haven’t been timing her. Went in just before you came, I guess. Ten, fifteen minutes.”
“She look happy when she was out here?” Malatesta said.
“Happy as she ever does,” the bartender said. He ate an olive and sipped Coca-Cola. “Hell of a lot happier’n she did last Thursday, anyway.”
“She was pissed at me because I stood her up Wednesday,” Malatesta said.
“That’ll do it,” the bartender said. “My second wife was like that. Jesus, what a temper she had when something got fucked up.”
“That’s what happened to me, Wednesday,” Malatesta said. “I got tied up. Told her on Tuesday that I’d see her here on Wednesday, I don’t show up on Wednesday and when I do show up on Thursday she’s like a barrel of tigers.”
“Maybe she was gettin’ her period,” the bartender said. “That always makes them jumpy.”
“Yeah,” Malatesta said.
“You got to be philosophical about it,” the bartender said. “Ten percent of the time, all women’re nuts. You want to know something? I am now separated from my third wife. Threw me out. She wants one of those things that, what do they call them, the things that watch the television for you and then when you get home you can see what was on when you were out. And I say to her, ‘That’s ridiculous. When’re you out? You’re home every night. Program comes on, watch it. Free.’ See, she went back to work this year, she decided they were probably going to foreclose onna house if she didn’t. Which was true. And it is her house. And she is all over me like a new suit. Shows she wants to watch’re the soap operas, and they’re on while she’s up the K-Mart sellin’ dingbats to dingbats or something. And I say to her, I say, ‘Hey, you want to keep the house, keep the house. It’s your house. Your first husband bought it. My name ain’t on it. I kick in my share. I do the best I can. Forget it. I’ll live inna apartment. You can stay home all day and watch the soaps. I got two other women I’m supportin’ for life. You want to lose the house, lose the house. Get offa my back.’
“See,” the bartender said, “I’m not as dumb as I look. I get her that thing, she’s going to tape all the soaps and I want to watch a football game on my day off or something, she’ll be watching some soap that was on Friday. It’s her television, so I won’t be able to say anything, and I’m going to end up spending Saturday and Sunday in some other barroom, which does not happen to be my idea of a couple days off a week from working in a barroom. But I am not as smart as I think I am, either, because she tells me she can get one of those TV recorder things with the employee’s discount for about six hundred bucks, and I say, ‘Shit, I can get you one on the street for three hundred, but I won’t do it.’ So she throws me out.”
“Sorry to hear it,” Malatesta said.
The bartender shrugged. “Hey, I been eighty-sixed out of better situations’n that. I’m just telling you, you’d better think a few times more about the lady in the powder room, is all.”
“The hell do you mean?” Malatesta said.
“You got the same weakness I got,” the bartender said. “Difference is, I know about my weakness and I can control it. You can’t control yours. That broad, no offense meant, is young and she is good-looking and she wants what she wants when she wants it. You know she made a speech in here Thursday night, ’fore you got in?”
“I heard she was loud,” Malatesta said.
“Everybody was in here heard she was loud,” the bartender said. “Thing of it is, she was also noisy, you know what I mean, and you didn’t exactly come off too well in the conversation.”
“Who was she with?” Malatesta asked.
“Don’t think she was really with anybody,” the bartender said. “She came in with that broad Judy that’s Finnegan’s regular bimbo, but I think that was just because they happened to get out of cabs at the same time. Judy was waitin’ for Finnegan, and he showed up about forty minutes later, and then about twenty minutes after that, Marion started in singing her songs because you weren’t here and you didn’t call her or anything, and you were cheap and this is some godforsaken place that you only take her because you don’t have to pay anything and you can freeload all night off of her and you never buy her anything or take her any place and all in all, you ain’t much good.”
“Jesus,” Malatesta said.
“I will tell you something,” the bartender said. “You may have calmed her down a little Thursday night, but after what I saw before you got here, if I was you I would just go right back out that door and let her diddle herself in the powder room. Before you get through with her, she is going to get you in a whole puddle of shit.”
JIMMY DANNAHER AND Leo Proctor sat in the van parked in the woods on the dirt road off Randolph Avenue in Milton, Massachusetts. “You didn’t say we had to walk around in the woods, Leo,” Jimmy said.
“Look,” Proctor said, “everybody knows they close up the dumps at night. At least I’m not asking you to climb over the fence there, the gate. All you got to do is follow me around the gate and we go through the woods and there we are, inna dump.”
“With the rats,” Dannaher said. “Skunks, too, probably. Big, fat, black-and-white skunks that spend all their time getting ready to drown me in their piss the minute I go tramping around in their garbage, and I’ll stink for six days.”
“You stink now,” Proctor said.
“Fuck you,” Dannaher said. “I’m serious about this. I don’t want to go in there with a bunch of rats. They’ve probably got snakes in there, too. They got snakes in the Blue Hills here. Poisonous snakes that can bite you and kill you. What if I step on a rattlesnake or something? Who’ll take care of my kids if I step on a rattlesnake, huh?”
“They haven’t got any rattlesnakes in there,” Proctor said.
“They have got rattlesnakes in there,” Dannaher said. “I know it because I read it in the paper. You don’t know nothing about rattlesnakes. They have had rattlesnakes out here for years. It’s been on television and everything. You don’t know anything. You’re going to get us both in prison before we’re through, and you’re telling me about rattlesnakes. I’m not going in there in the dark.”
“And then who’s gonna take care of your kids?” Proctor said.
“If I don’t go in there?” Dannaher said. “I am, of course.”
“Like you did when you were in the can for a while?” Proctor said.
“If I don’t get into this,” Dannaher said, “I won’t be in the can for a while, and I can do it.”
“With no money?” Proctor said.
“I can get some money,” Dannaher said.
“Yup,” Proctor said, “you can get some money. But you can’t get any money from me unless you come into that fucking dump with me and take your chances with the snakes and the skunks. You will have to find somebody else who is willing to give you some money, and I wish you l
uck, is what I do, because I think you are going to need it. If I was you, I would rather take my chances with the skunks.”
“I don’t see why the hell they lock dumps up at night,” Dannaher said. “They afraid somebody’ll steal something from them?”
“No,” Proctor said. “They lock up the dump road at night because they want to stop people from giving them things, such as whole messes of shit they will have to bury. They block the road in the middle of the night because they don’t want people coming in and throwing away all kinds of trees and rocks and shit like that. They don’t put a fence around the woods because they don’t care if people go in the dump and catch a few rats. What they care about is people that are working on construction and demolition and stuff, that don’t even live in the town, driving their trucks up and saving themselves a lot of money that they would have to pay to have the stuff carted away, and dumping the stuff in the town dump.”
“I don’t see why they care,” Dannaher said.
“All right,” Proctor said, “I was lying to you. The real reason is that snakes and skunks and rats always use the road when they try to get out of the dump. Every night the sun goes down and the guy that drives the bulldozer around goes back to the shack and gets his jacket on and goes home for Miller Time. And on his way down the road in his pick-up truck, he stops and he gets out and he wraps the big chain through the posts and he takes the big padlock out of the truck and he locks the gate shut.
“Now,” Proctor said, “the snakes and the skunks and the rats are a long way away from this gate. They cannot hear whether the guy stops the truck and puts the chain and the lock on. So every night they wait until they think he is gone, and then they say to each other, ‘Maybe tonight he forgot.’ So all the snakes and the skunks and the rats get up and they go down the road to the gate and one of the snakes climbs it, climbs right up the fence, to see if the chain and the lock are on. And every night, they are.
“So the snake that does the inspection,” Proctor said, “he climbs back down again, all discouraged and everything, and he tells all the rest of the animals, ‘No use, fellas, the gate’s locked again. He didn’t forget tonight, either.’ Then they all go back up the road to the dump.
“See, Jimmy,” Proctor said, “snakes and skunks and rats are not very bright. It does not occur to them to go through the woods. If the gate is not open, they think they have to stay. The people who run the dump know this. They want all their rats and other animals to stay in the dump, because they are sort of like pets, you know? So they lock the gate, and the animals stay in the dump and eat dead meat and fruit and that stuff, and it keeps the place neat.
“Therefore,” Proctor said, “if you walk through those woods with me, Jimmy, around that gate and so forth, there is no chance in the world that you will step on one of those animals. You are as safe as you would be in church, because the animals do not use the woods. Okay? And in addition, you will get some money, so you can take care of your kids.”
“I don’t know what I’m supposed to do,” Dannaher said.
“Yes, you do,” Proctor said. “You and I are going to open up the back of this thing and we are going to take out three steel traps and three pounds of smelly old fish heads that I have in this plastic bag there. One of us is going to carry two traps and the other one is going to carry one trap and the fish. We are going to go through the woods and the guy in front is going to hold the flashlight so that the guy behind him can see where he is going. When we get around the gate, we can walk on the road because all the animals have gone to bed except for the rats, and they are watching the late news on their television sets. When we get to the actual dump we will put the fish in the traps and set the traps and then we will go a little ways away and we will wait until we hear that we have got a lot of rats in our three traps. Then we will come back to the trucks with our rats in our traps.”
“What about the fish?” Dannaher said.
“We will allow the rats to eat the fish,” Proctor said. “Believe me when I tell you, that as far as I am concerned, the rats are welcome to that fish, because it stinks. Besides, rats have to eat. We have work for those rats to do, and we want them nice and healthy and ready to run fast when we light them off, so we will transcend our own appetite for the fish and let them eat it.”
Carrying two steel cages, each about two feet long and one foot wide, in his left hand, and the flashlight in his right hand, Proctor led Dannaher through the underbrush on the northerly side of the gate, trampling the low, green, three-leafed plants. On the easterly side of the gate they stepped onto the gravel road and walked up a long hill. Now and then a trailer truck passed on Randolph Avenue behind them, the lights barely disturbing the darkness. The gravel crunched and the hill became steeper. Dannaher said, “Slow down, for Christ sake.”
“You’re outta shape, Jimma,” Proctor said. “See? Here’s another thing that I am doing for you. I am getting you some exercise so you don’t get yourself a heart attack when you are still a young man.”
“I think I’m getting one now,” Dannaher said.
WILFRID MACK SAT on the aluminum chair with the yellow plastic covering, in Mavis Davis’s kitchen at 25 Bristol Street. She was in her late forties. She wore a red jersey dress which showed that she had kept her figure, and an expression of weariness.
“Mister Mack,” she said, “it’s nice of you to come, and I appreciate it. But I don’t know what you or anybody else can do. You know it just as well as I do—Alfred goes off half-cocked. I’ve tried everything I could think of, to do with him. It didn’t work. His sister’s a fine lady and she works very hard. I get out of bed every morning and go down to the hospital and talk to the people all day on the telephone, the ones who haven’t paid their bills any more’n I have, and then I come home at night with a bag of groceries that I can’t afford and I cook dinner on a stove that doesn’t work right. Selene eats fast and goes to work, and if Alfred’s in the mood, he gets up and eats before he goes down to work for Walter all night long. The plumbing backs up and the owner won’t fix it. You can’t even get Mister Fein on the telephone. Two guys came over here the other day, one of the neighbors was telling me, and went into the cellar with a lot of tools, and then they went right out again. They didn’t do anything. If I fill that sink up with water right now, and you sit here and wait for it to go out, you won’t get anything done tomorrow.
“Just as soon,” she said, “just as soon as I start to think that I am making some progress and there must be some way that an apartment with three people in it, all of them working, can have something like a decent life for themselves and send their kids to school, or maybe just go out to a movie, something happens. We don’t have a car, but we do have lamps. They burn out bulbs. Last week, the summer here and everything, I figured Selene would be working full-time and lots of nights I could walk home or take the subway instead of spending all that money on cabs, and I went out and put thirty dollars down on an air conditioner.
“Mister Mack,” she said, “I don’t know how I’m going to pay for that air conditioner. I just wanted one cool room and I put thirty dollars down, and this week I got a letter that the taxes went up and the heating oil went up and my share of those things is going to just wipe out my air conditioner.
“If you want to look out that window,” she said, “you can. This is the third floor and the back yard’s full of junk. You can pull that chair over there and look right out and see a yard that’s full of junk that people threw away but nobody ever bothered to pick up. You can even get a little breeze over there, if you can stand looking at the junk. But it’d be a good idea if you didn’t tilt too far back in the chair because the back legs’re a little shaky. And don’t lean on the table either. We don’t get good meat very often, but when we do it’s hell cutting it because the table’s so wobbly. I keep this stuff, Mister Mack, because I can’t afford anything better. I make twelve thousand dollars a year and both my kids work, but Alfred gives me nothing and Selene buy
s her own stuff. If I want an air conditioner, I have to eat on a wobbly table, and now I’m probably going to lose my thirty dollars that I put down on an air conditioner. You politicians. If you don’t mind me saying so, you make me sick.”
“Look,” Mack said, “I’m only a state legislator, ma’am. There’re some limits to what I can do. I don’t set the price of oil and I don’t set the city tax rate. I can’t make the man clean up the yard and I can’t do anything about the heat and the humidity. Give me a break, lady.”
“Mister Mack,” she said, “you asked me a question. You asked me about Alfred and why I don’t calm him down and let his sister solve her own problems. You asked me that. I just told you why I can’t do that. You didn’t listen to me.
“Alfred’s got a temper. I don’t know where he got it. His father sure didn’t have one. He never showed it, if he did. All he ever did was smile and say he would think of something to do about it, but he never did. Until the day he thought of something finally, and he did it. He ran away. That was Roosevelt’s way of doing something. Maybe he was right. He was no good at this business of getting along with other people and enough to eat and a place to sleep that was warm in the winter and at least so you could breathe in the summer. He was a nice man, but he liked to have his glass of beer and he almost always had fifty cents to go sit in the bleachers at the Red Sox game. He went to work at the fine offices downtown and he reported every night. He washed the floors and he waxed the floors. At Christmas, sometimes, one of the professional gentlemen would have his secretary give Roosevelt a fifth of cheap whiskey. He would give me a new nightgown and the kids would get one toy each, and everybody was happy.
“He was happy because he didn’t have to do very much, and they were happy with one toy because they were little then and they weren’t seeing what all the other kids were getting. I was happy because where we were living then was damned cold in the winter and I needed a new nightgown. A new flannel nightgown that would be nice and warm for me until it wore out in April, because those were cheap nightgowns Roosevelt bought, Mister Mack. They were very cheap nightgowns. Roosevelt was polite to everybody, and he was mostly a happy man, at least when I knew him, but when the kids started gettin’ bigger, and noticed more things, and I grew up a little myself, we started talking to him. Maybe we talked too much, Mister Mack. Maybe we gave Roosevelt more trouble than he could handle. Maybe Roosevelt found out he might have been a happy man, and he might have been a nice man, but we didn’t think he was a very good man. And he wasn’t. And we didn’t.
The Rat on Fire Page 8
