Today has surpassed all of my expectations. I cannot wait to tell Nikki, Becca, and Tamara about our date. I don’t doubt they’ll attack me the second I walk through the door, wanting to know all about it. I think they were just as excited as I was, if not more, while I waited for Chase tonight.
I also can’t wait to see how the remainder of our vacation goes, because if every day is like this, I don’t think I’ll ever want to leave South Carolina. When the time comes, my girls will be dragging me away kicking and screaming.
My head and heart are both telling me two different things right now. My head is saying to make some distance, because I’m setting myself up for heartbreak, but my heart is telling me to grasp onto these moments with both hands, because I’ll cherish this time in my life forever. Right now, my heart is winning.
IT’S BEEN ELEVEN DAYS since my first date with Ashlynn, and let me just say I’ve never had blue balls this bad in my life! My hand just isn’t cutting it. Ashlynn has tried many times to convince me to just fuck her, but I want to make sure she doesn’t regret doing it afterwards, so I’ve been spending every day with her in safe zones.
I took her to the aquarium for the day earlier this week, then out on my boat for some deep sea fishing and tubing with all of our friends. Vance has been seeing the Reagan chick he had met last summer a lot over the last eleven days, so she’s been over to the house, hanging out with all of us too.
Today, we went to Family Kingdom, which is an amusement park by the boardwalk. It’s a little cooler, with the temperature only in the low eighties, so we figured it’d be a perfect day to go hang out, play arcade games, and ride roller coasters. Now, we’re heading to the boardwalk to grab dinner before going back to our houses.
I got a text earlier from one of my friends who lives about a mile down from me, telling me he’s throwing a party tonight and that Vance, Parker, and I can bring whoever we want, so I’m hoping Ashlynn and her friends will join us, since Reagan already told Vance she’ll go.
Normally, I’d want to go to a party so I can find a new girl to bring back to my house, but now the only girl I think about fucking is Ashlynn. It’s scaring me how fast and hard I’m falling for this girl. Every day I wake up and can’t wait to see her. The idea of her leaving in two weeks is killing me.
The entire walk to boardwalk, Ashlynn and I walk with our hands laced together. Parker and Vance continuously give me sly glances with knowing grins on their faces. They’ve never seen me this way with a girl before, and use every free moment to bust my balls about it.
“Can we stop at the candy shop before we go eat?” Ashlynn asks softly as she gives my hand a light tug.
“Sure. We are on vacation, so I guess dessert before dinner is totally okay,” I tease, pulling her to me and brushing my lips against hers.
“Will you two cut the PDA? It’s complete and utter torture watching you two be all mushy every second of the day, while our boyfriends are living it up in freaking Cancun right now!” Tamara says, playfully shoving me in the arm.
“Amen, sister,” Nikki says, high-fiving Tamara.
Laughing, I release Ashlynn’s hand and slide mine into the back pocket of her barely there cut-off shorts, giving her perfect ass a squeeze. “Sorry, ladies, but what you’re asking of me can’t be done. There’s no way I can keep my mouth or hands off this girl.”
Ashlynn giggles as I lean down, kiss her neck, and murmur against her skin, “I’m addicted to you, Ashlynn Marie. I don’t think I can ever get enough of you.”
Slapping my chest, Ashlynn, still laughing, yells at me, “Will you quit it? They are children here.”
“Yeah, you two stop with all the fuckin’ kissin’ so we can eat. My stomach is growling so damn loud I can’t take it.”
“You’ll eat soon enough. Stop whining like a little bitch, Parker,” Vance says as he drapes his arm over Reagan’s shoulder and pulls her in for a kiss.
Parker lets out an aggravated groan and glares at Vance. “Seriously, dude? My body is my fuckin’ temple. It takes a lot of hard work and eating to look this good.”
Becca, who’s been hooking up with Parker for the last two weeks, leaves Tamara and Nikki and skips around to walk beside him. She runs her hand down his chest and beams up at him. “It’d be a shame to let anything happen to this body. I swear I see that V every night in my dreams.”
“Oh my God, y’all are wacked. I don’t know what is in the water here, but all I know is I ain’t drinking it,” Nikki blurts out as she whips her head from Parker down to Ashlynn and me. “I so need to get laid by something that doesn’t run on double-As!”
I burst out laughing, along with everyone else at that one.
After Ashlynn got her salt water taffy, which I’ve never seen a girl who loves that stuff as much as she does, by the way. We headed towards Broadway Bill’s Bar & Grill, the same place I took Ashlynn on our first date. Halfway there, I spot Sophie and her friends coming out of a gift shop. I don’t realize I tighten my grip on Ashlynn’s hand until she brings her free hand to my shoulder. Rubbing it, she asks, “Are you okay?”
“What?” I ask caught off-guard, and glance down at her as I try to avoid making eye contact with Sophie.
“You just practically cut the blood flow from my hand.” She laughs as she squeezes me and swings our entwined hands into the air.
Shaking my head, I apologize, “I’m so sorry. It’s nothing; I’m fine.”
My heart is racing as I spot Sophie heading straight towards us. Vance spots her and her friends too, and mumbles, “Shit,” under his breath.
“Hey, strangers! Long time no see,” Sophie says, giving us a smile I can tell is as fake as her tits. She rests her hands on her hips and slides her eyes over all of us before giving a look to her two friends before plastering back on her big fake smile. “Are y’all going to Linc’s party tonight?” Her eyes turn and focus on me, and I feel as if I’m trying to swallow a boulder, and my heart is racing so fast I think I can hear the blood flowing to it in my ears. “I was really hoping we could get together, since I haven’t seen you since the Fourth of July.” Sophie completely ignores the fact I’m holding Ashlynn’s hand as she stands only a few inches away from me.
This chick can’t take a clue. She’s been blowing up my phone since the day after the Fourth. I figured me not getting back to her would’ve been a good enough hint I am no longer interested, but I guess she just isn’t that smart.
Clearing my throat, I hold Ashlynn’s hand a little tighter, trying to silently tell her she has nothing to worry about. I told her before and I’ll tell her a million more times if need be that Sophie means nothing to me. “Yeah, I got a text from Linc a little while ago telling me about the party. We’ll be there, so I guess we’ll see ya.”
I figure that’ll be a good enough response and we can go on our way, but of course, it isn’t.
Sophie, completely oblivious to the fact Ashlynn is standing right beside me and holding my fucking hand for Christ’s sake, asks, “Well, I was wondering, since you’re going and I’m going, if maybe you want to go together? I’ve texted you a few times to get together, but you’ve never gotten back to me.” She just can’t take a hint.
“Umm, well, I’m actually going with Ashlynn,” I say, and notice the look of shock flash across Ashlynn’s face, but it quickly disappears. She releases my hand and wraps her arm around my waist, hugging me as she stares blankly at Sophie.
“It was nice meeting you, Sophie, and I’m sure we’ll run into each other again tonight, but we really must be going. We are on our way to grab dinner before we head to Linc’s.” Ashlynn’s voice comes out sweet, but I can hear the hint of anger in it. To other’s who don’t know her, they wouldn’t notice it, but I do. I hope none of that anger is in any way directed at me. I knew this chick would come back to bite me in the ass. Why the hell did I ever get together with her that night?
“Aww, well aren’t you cute? I bet you think Chase here is the sweetest guy ever, an
d you’re just so excited to be out with him today. Well, FYI, if you want to keep hanging out with Chase, I suggest you keep your legs closed, because once you give into him, you’ll be tossed to the curb, just like me and every other girl who’s come into contact with him.”
Ashlynn tenses against my body, becoming rigid. Why do chicks gotta be so damn catty?
“Sophie, you are making a fool of yourself right now. You don’t know me or Ashlynn. Going out with me and my boys two times doesn’t give you the right to act like you know me. And a little FYI for you, Ashlynn isn’t just some girl. So why don’t you take a hint and leave me and my friends the fuck alone?”
Sophie’s face drops quickly, wiping the smirk from her lips. She opens and closes her mouth, but nothing comes out. I hate being mean to girls, but the minute she started spewing shit at Ashlynn, she crossed the line.
“What the hell ever. Don’t say I didn’t warn you,” is all she says to Ashlynn before storming away from us.
“What a psycho bitch,” Parker grumbles before clapping me on the back. “You okay, bro?”
“Yeah, I’m fine. I’m just sorry you had to deal with that,” I say, turning to Ashlynn, who is now quiet and refusing to look at me. She still has her arm around my waist, but she isn’t holding me as tightly as she was when we first started talking to Sophie.
“It’s okay. I’m fine. I knew at some point I’d have to deal with a run-in with one of your conquests. At least she didn’t cry or claw my eyes out, so I guess it went as well as could be expected.”
Her words feel like a sucker punch to my gut. Never until now have I actually felt like a bad person. I’m young and have my whole life ahead of me. Sure, I’ve lived it up and slept around, but what twenty-two year old hasn’t? None of us think about what it’d be like if we meet that one girl who’ll make us want to change our ways and what we’d do if our past and our present collide?
I know if it was me and I had some asshole standing in front of me, making it known he fucked Ashlynn, I’d pound his face into the asphalt.
“So, there’s a party tonight and we’re all going?” Becca asks, changing the subject, thank God.
“Yeah, it starts at nine. We were planning on asking y’all at dinner if you wanted to go with us, but Sophie kind of put Chase here on the spot,” Parker says, slapping me on the back.
“Well, I for one am excited to go! It isn’t a beach vacation unless we attended a summer beach party!” Becca exclaims.
Now we just have to pray Sophie and her friends don’t try to stir up more trouble at the party tonight.
The entire time we were eating, Ashlynn barely said two words to me. She only talked and laughed with Becca, Nikki, and Tamara, and even chatted a bit with Reagan. I could feel the knots in my stomach twisting with every passing second. I fucked up big time. I really like this girl, and to think maybe my chance is now over is pissing me the hell off. The urge to punch something is overwhelming.
My big mouth told Ashlynn I’d only met Sophie two days before the Fourth, which is also when I started my game of flirting with Ashlynn too. At the time, I thought Ashlynn would be just another girl I’d work my charm on, fuck, and move on from. Never did I imagine I’d spend the next two weeks spending every day with her, and not even having sex. I don’t even recognize the person I’ve become since meeting her. Parker and Vance think it’s all an act, that I’m playing a game with her for entertainment, but the truth is I’m really falling for this girl, and I don’t know if I will be able to pretend as if we never happened when I return to Charlotte.
She’s smart, so I know for a fact she’s put two and two together and realized not only did I go out with Sophie after our amazing day out on the boat, but I fucked her too. I want to punch myself in the fucking face after seeing the hurt in Ashlynn’s eyes when Sophie said I’d just toss her aside after getting her into my bed. That’s the farthest thing from the truth. I don’t know how I’m even going to survive saying goodbye to her when she leaves back to Georgia, let alone voluntarily push her out of my life.
Pulling my truck into the driveway, I park beside Vance’s Mustang. He opted to drive himself and Reagan, since I couldn’t fit everyone in my truck. As soon as I shift the truck into park, everyone hurries out and heads toward our beach houses.
I quickly swing open my door, jump down, and run around the truck to meet Ashlynn. Grabbing her hand, I pull on it, stopping her from going up the stairs. “Ashlynn, wait,” I plead as her friends run up the stairs to go get ready to leave. Becca told Parker she’d be over as soon as she showered and was dressed for the party. I know Ashlynn said she’d go, but I want to make sure she’s okay first.
“What? I need to get ready,” she says with a little more venom in her tone than I was hoping for.
Wrapping my arms around her, I pull her to my chest and lock my eyes with hers. The hurt in her eyes is like a knife twisting in my chest. “I just want to talk to you and make sure you’re okay. I don’t want you letting Sophie get to you. She’s just a jealous and spiteful person. I would never do anything to hurt you purposely.”
She stares up at me a few beats, the only sound being the seagulls flying above us. It’s a calm day, with gentle waves rolling in. My senses are filled with her sweet, delicious perfume mixing with the salty air. I slide one hand into her hair, feeling her silky blonde strands. She closes her eyes as soon as my fingers touch her scalp.
At least I know my touch doesn’t repulse her. She parts her lips and lets out a shaky breath before opening her eyes back up, and when she does, the hurt that was there is magnified as my reflection shines from her now dark and stormy blue eyes.
“I’m scared, Chase. I keep trying to tell myself you’re different from the cocky asshole I met two weeks ago, but seeing her was like having ice water dumped over my head. You’ve been so sweet, and I’ve loved every single second I’ve spent with you, but I can’t help but think…is it all just a game to you? Once we finally have sex, will it be the last time I see you, because you’ll have gotten what you want and move on to the next naive girl?”
God, I hate she feels this way. The sad part is she’s right. The Chase everyone knows would do what she’s thinking and wouldn’t look back as I walked away. I did it to Sophie, and so many girls before her, but with Ashlynn, it’s not like that. No matter how many times I tell her though, I don’t think she’ll ever believe me.
“I hate that you think that, Ashlynn. I’ve been an asshole so many times in my life that I don’t blame you for thinking that I’d use you, but I’ll tell you now and I’ll tell you again every single day until you leave to go back to Georgia—I like you. A lot. More than any girl I’ve ever met in my entire fucking life. I have no intention of using you. Why the hell do you think I’ve refused to have sex with you? Never in my life have I turned down sex, but I wanted to make sure you were one hundred percent sure you were okay with our arrangement before I allowed you to accept me into your bed.”
She relaxes in my arms and lays her head on my chest, resting her cheek against my heart. It’s racing so fast right now it feels like a wrecking ball slamming repeatedly against my ribs, trying to bust free and jump straight into Ashlynn’s hands.
“Can I ask you something and you be honest with me?”
Fuck, I don’t know if I’m backing myself into a corner right now, but reluctantly, I tell her, “I’ll tell you anything you want to know.” I hope to God agreeing to this doesn’t bury my ass deeper into the hole I’ve dug myself into today.
Pulling away from me, she slides her hand into mine and leads me to the stairs to sit, then tugging for me to sit down beside her.
She silently picks at the nail polish on her fingernails, not looking at me as she asks the one question I was wishing she wouldn’t ask, “Did you sleep with Sophie before or after our day out on the boat?”
Raking both my hands through my hair, I let out a loud, frustrated groan as I prepare to hurt her once again today. “After. I’m an assh
ole, Ashlynn. I’m so sorry. I don’t know what the fuck I was thinking that night. I knew it was wrong, but I still did it. The most fucked up part was the whole time I was with her, all I could think about was you, but still…I did it.”
I spot out of the corner of my eye Ashlynn brushing a tear from her cheek. My chest hurts so bad right now I rub at it with the palm of my hand. Feelings fucking suck monkey balls. This is why I’ve always kept my love life simple. Once you develop feelings, everything gets complicated.
Reaching out to her, I wrap my arm around her shoulders and hug her to me. “Please, don’t cry,” I murmur into her hair as I press a kiss to the top of her head. “I messed up big time, but not once since that day have I looked at another girl. I know we’re just friends, but I really like you. I knew the second I saw you with that Liam guy the next morning I fucked up royally not asking you to go out that night instead of her. I’ve worked every day to make it up to you.”
Ashlynn shifts on the stairs and looks up at me with watery eyes and I feel sick to my stomach again. Fuck. I feel like the world’s biggest jackass right now.
“If we would’ve had sex on the beach the night of our first date, would we be where we are today, still hanging out and doing whatever it is we’re doing? Or would you have gotten what you wanted and moved on, putting me back in the just-friends zone? I’m so confused right now. I hate I have all these awful thoughts buzzing around in my head. Every day I get closer to going home, the more it hurts to be with you, but the idea of not being with you hurts more. Does that make sense?”
She’s adorable when she gets like this. She rambles on and on, firing off question after question. “Well, that was a lot of questions in one, baby, but to answer them all, if we would’ve had sex that night, believe me, we’d still be where we are today, but we would’ve been having a lot of sex over the last two weeks. Trust me—you’re not the only one confused with everything going on. I am too. I keep telling myself what we have is just for right now, and once you leave, we’ll say our goodbyes and go back to our normal lives, but honestly, I don’t know if I can do that. I find myself falling for you more and more every day we spend together.”
Just for the Summer (Chasing Carolina #0.5) Page 7
