I nodded slowly in agreement and watched Brandy and Aaron remain a little distant as the night went on. Maybe this had been building, and I missed it because I’d been so busy with my own whirlwind life of baby, wedding, and fight.
Not to mention what happened after the fight.
A shiver ran through me and Ayden squeezed me harder.
“Are you okay? Too cold? I can get a blanket?” he asked.
“No. I’m just perfect, but I’m crashing quickly.”
“Even though no one knows a thing, I’m sure they’d all be understanding if you made it up to bed,” Ayden offered, and I shook my head.
Instead of leaving the guests, I fell asleep on them right in Ayden’s arms. It wasn’t until I vaguely remember being carried down the hall that I realized I’d even been out. I heard goodnights and saw the reflection of lights flick on upstairs as everyone found a place to crash for the evening.
My head lolled back into Ayden, and I felt him glide me into the sheets.
“I could take advantage of you right now,” he murmured.
I smiled and held my finger to his lips. “You wouldn’t dare.”
He grinned and shook his head as he pulled the covers up to my chin.
“I’m going to take a quick shower. Love you,” he whispered, giving me a kiss before heading into the bathroom. Maybe I’d surprise him with some sexy time after all.
And that was the last thing I remembered until morning; that and the odd sensation something wasn’t right between Aaron and Brandy.
Brandy and I were in Seattle walking along the sidewalk. The holiday decorations were already making their way onto light poles and in storefronts. I was bundled in a goose down jacket, an oversized sweater, and leggings. The upper half of me was plenty warm and the lower half thought I’d jumped into the Pacific.
I glanced inside a small boutique and noticed several necklaces with matching earrings that looked intriguing and like the perfect gift for Ayden’s mom, but I was grateful to have Brandy by my side in case I veered off the path.
We stepped inside, and the jingle of the bell notified the salesperson customers had appeared as I beelined to the necklaces hanging on the plastic forms.
“Anything I can help you find?” a woman asked. She was around fifty with a pleasant smile and short haircut.
“Just browsing,” I replied. “Thank you.”
“If you need any help, please let me know.”
“Thanks.” I turned my attention to a beautiful malachite and pearl beaded necklace. The contrasting green and ivory was stunning, and I totally saw Brandy’s mom in it.
“Do you think your mom would like this one?”
Brandy took a step closer and examined the necklace. “I think she would love it. The necklace is so her. Stunning, really.” She flipped the price tag over and looked a little stunned. “You don’t have to spend that much on my mom.”
“Well, this is kind of a big event, and I want her to have something she’ll always treasure.”
“This necklace would accomplish that,” Brandy laughed. “She’ll be thrilled to acquire another daughter with exquisite taste.”
We walked toward the saleswoman, and I explained I would like to purchase the necklace. She quickly came onto the floor to retrieve and wrap up the gift.
“How’s my brother doing?” Brandy asked. “Any problems with his memory or headaches?”
“No. I’ve asked, and he promises his headaches have gone away, and he doesn’t seem to be having any issues with memory. Granted, he could be a good faker. Kind of like you.” I winked at her.
Her brow furrowed as I handed the saleswoman my debit card.
“Me?” Brandy asked.
I didn’t answer until we went outside. The cold air chilled my bones again, and I couldn’t wait to land in Bermuda.
“I can tell you’re hiding something.” I glanced at Brandy.
“I’m not hiding anything.”
“I think both you and Aaron are hiding something.”
“Why would you say that?”
“Both Ayden and I can tell.”
“I need a swimsuit,” Brandy said, pointing over at Nordstrom.
“You’re avoiding my questions.”
“I’m not ignoring your questions. I answered them. We aren’t hiding anything.”
The crosswalk light changed, and we made our way over to Nordstrom. I probably should be looking for a swimsuit too, but I wasn’t going to fall for her techniques. I invented them. Avoidance was my signature move until Ayden.
The door we used landed us in the makeup department, and I glanced around the endless sea of glass counters staffed with women and men pushing the latest and greatest beauty products. Another department I should probably hang out in before the trip.
“Brandy, I love you to death. I do. But I’m telling you that I know you’re not being honest with me, and it hurts my feelings.”
She stopped abruptly in the purse department and spun around to stare at me.
“I could say the same thing, but I’m not.”
“I think that’s because we know my secret ought to make itself known fairly soon. There’s no secret there. We just haven’t announced it.”
Brandy wouldn’t make eye contact with me. Instead, she stared in the direction of the escalator. It felt like she was casting me away, and it felt off, unlike anything Brandy would ever do.
“Is everything okay between you and Aaron?” I pressed.
“Of course. He’s amazing. Ever since Paris…”
I smiled and her gaze came back to mine.
“He’s sensational.”
“Would you please just tell me so we don’t spend the rest of the day with me begging you to tell me, and you denying there is anything to tell.”
Brandy’s jaw tensed. “I’m getting a little stiff. Do you mind if we find a seat?”
I saw a seating area by the escalator with four velvet chairs on an animal print rug and motioned for her to follow me over. We both took a seat and she stretched out her leg.
“Are you in pain?” I asked.
She shook off the question with a wave of her hand, and I knew the answer was yes.
“I’ll tell you, but I don’t want to do it here, and I’d rather have Aaron with me.” She had a faraway look in her eyes and it unnerved me.
“It must be serious.”
“It’s complex.”
I sat back in the chair and looked around at all the busy shoppers. It seemed like the world always scurried on by barely stopping to allow even the slowest members to catch up.
“So at our dinner tonight, you’ll have Aaron tell me what’s going on?”
“He’s not going to be happy about it, but yeah, I’ll have him fill you in.”
She stood up and stretched. “All better. Now let’s do some shopping.”
“Right. It’ll be so easy to focus when I’m dying to know what my best friend is hiding from me.”
I followed Brandy to the escalators. Sportswear and swimsuits were up a floor. Truthfully, I hadn’t even thought about swimming and fitting in a suit. It was probably a good idea to not assume I could still fit in the ones I had at home. Maybe the visual of me in a suit would be distracting enough to keep me occupied until dinner.
Racks of yoga pants, leggings, sports bras, and tube tops occupied the space and made me extremely aware of my ever-changing body. It was the body I couldn’t keep up with. I ignored the last thought and stood on my toes, finally spotting a tiny section of swimwear.
“It probably isn’t the best season to buy a swimsuit,” I muttered.
“Beggars can’t be choosers.”
“How does that apply?” I chuckled.
Two racks of suits backed against the wall. There were several string bikinis, purple flowered two-pieces, skimpy monokinis, and a few one pieces that appeared to be shaming themselves so we wouldn’t have to do it for them.
Brandy picked up a cute sherbet orange two-piece. The bo
ttom was high-waisted with stripes and the top was polka dots.
“That is super cute,” I gushed, my hand landing on a one-piece.
I pulled it off the rack and examined it. The world was full of beautiful and sexy one-piece suits. How in the world did I find the one rack in town that made me feel like I was on the high school swim team?
Brandy eyed it suspiciously. “That’s an interesting choice.”
The royal blue stripe running down the center did nothing for the imagination. It did nothing for life itself. I pushed the suit back into the rack, hoping the other suits would eat it alive as I skimmed across the other fabrics.
“What about this?” I asked, pulling out an ivory one-piece with shells twisted on the straps and a rope that tied around the waist.
“That’s cute. Is it lined?”
I looked in the crotch. “No, but it seems like thick material.”
Brandy’s boisterous laugh turned some heads in the department. “You want to trust important bits to thick fabric? Let me paint this visual. You’re feeling good about life. Your long, wet hair is cascading down your back. You’re taking a few steps out of the water, the warm breeze kissing your skin.”
“Doesn’t sound all bad.”
“As you continue to emerge from the crystal clear water, more eyes turn toward you. Men are smiling, and women are blushing on your behalf. You glance down at your body and you see everything. And by everything, I mean down to nipple color.”
Laughter erupted from my gut. It wasn’t a small burst of laughter. It was the feel good, change-your-day kind of laughter as I heard Brandy relay her own personal experience exchanged with the “you” pronoun.
“And then their eyes slip south.” Brandy continued. “And it only gets worse.”
“So it sounds like I should put this suit back.”
“Swim at your own risk. That’s all I’m saying,” Brandy teased. “Why not this one?”
She pulled out a cute two-piece, teal fabric with white piping.
Flashing a grateful smile, I shook my head. “Maybe if we can find it up a size. That’s my old size.”
She slid the suit back in and began checking tags.
“How about this?” Her brows shot up in excitement.
“It looks pretty tiny.”
“Nah. The top might be a little tiny, but the bottoms have full coverage. See?” She twirled the red suit around and pointed at the back.
I thought about everyone who was coming to the wedding. Did it really matter if someone saw me in a two-piece with a belly that no longer sucked in? No. And I certainly didn’t care if some stranger saw me.
I snatched the suit out of her hands and carried on looking through the racks. I found a black suit with a top that zipped in the front and a pale pink suit with a floral design.
One of the sales associates led us to our dressing rooms. Brandy still only had the one suit to try on. I assumed she was pretty confident in her choice. I, on the other hand, had absolutely no idea what I was getting myself into.
I hung up my goose down jacket and stripped out of my leggings and top, tossing them on the seat.
I decided to start with the zipper suit. I pulled up the bottoms and glanced in the mirror. I looked like I was exploding marshmallow out on all sides with my white underwear gushing out. I didn’t have a good feeling about the rest of the day. I quickly slid out of my bra and slipped into the top, zipping it up before shoving my white underwear underneath the black bottoms so I could somewhat visualize how this should look. Pushing in the last piece of fabric by my thigh, I looked in the mirror and turned around.
It wasn’t that bad. In fact, it was kind of cute. A piece of underwear fell out under my butt, and I tucked it back in. This wasn’t a definite no, but it wasn’t a definite yes either.
I unzipped the top and pulled off the bottoms and put them back on the tiny hanger. I looked between the pale pink suit and the red one, deciding which one to try on next.
“How’s it going?” I hollered to Brandy.
“Great.”
“Great,” I mimicked back in a snotty tone, and she snickered.
I pulled on the pink suit and didn’t even need to bother with the top. This was a definite no. The triangle portion of the suit turned into a deformed hexagon as my thighs ate the fabric and my belly guided the way.
I exhaled dramatically. And reached for the red suit. Did I really want to call this much attention to myself?
To be different, I started with the top and tied the string around my neck and fastened the clasp around my back.
I glanced in the mirror and chuckled at the reflection of myself in a sultry red bikini top and a white pair of granny panties that were beyond loose. I wasn’t quite busting out of the top. There would be a point in the future that would happen, but I doubted it would be while we were in Bermuda. I turned to the side, blocking out my white underwear, and bounced. Somehow, things were staying in place.
I pulled the red bottoms off the hanger and slid them up my legs. The bottoms offered so much coverage I barely had to stuff my underwear underneath the bikini bottoms. It was a sign.
“Found it,” I exclaimed.
Brandy’s door slammed shut, and her voice was right outside my door. “Which one?”
“The red one.”
“Can I see?”
I opened the door slowly and peeked around the hall. Seeing no one but Brandy, I opened the door all the way.
Brandy’s mouth dropped open. “Wow. You’re a stunner.”
I twirled around once and then quickly shut the door on her.
I changed out of the red suit and tugged my leggings back on and pulled my top over my head. That’s all it took and a meltdown commenced. It suddenly felt like I’d been thrown in a sauna. I stared at the goose down jacket and didn’t even want to touch the thing. The heat was internal. It was rolling out of my skin. I glanced in the mirror and saw the tiny beads of sweat dotting my hairline.
“Crap.”
“What’s up?” Brandy asked, as I swung open the door. “Oooh.”
“Can you hold my jacket? I think if I even touched the goose down I would literally melt.”
“Totally.”
I handed Brandy my jacket and picked up my purse and the bag containing the necklace. All I wanted was to get outside and let the cold air wrap around every crevice. But I had a cashier and an escalator in my way.
“Mission accomplished,” Brandy said gleefully, making our way to the cashier.
I paid for my item and glanced at the receipt. It was almost time to meet up with Aaron and everyone for dinner. It was our last group dinner before we headed off to Bermuda. We were going to go out a couple days before everyone else.
“Who knew bathing suit shopping was such a time sink? Looks like I’ll be getting my answers before we know it.”
Brandy stiffened and nodded. She handed the cashier her debit card and waited to push in her pin.
She looked over at me as she waited for the receipt to print and let out a big breath. “I just don’t want anything to take away from your big day.”
“It won’t. Promise.”
Brandy grabbed the receipt and her bag, and we began our trek to the outside world where I’d hopefully be able to cool off before we met everyone for dinner.
“You know how sometimes you think you want to know something and then you find out what that something was and you almost wished you didn’t know?” She asked.
“Yeah.”
“Well, I only hope that’s not what’s about to happen here.”
Brandy and I stood in the lobby of the Italian restaurant in downtown Seattle. The rustic décor and dim lighting created the perfect place to defrost. The moment we’d hit the sidewalk outside Nordstrom, I instantly cooled off. It felt like an Arctic blast was barreling through Seattle, but it was too early for that.
We walked over to the oversized stone fireplace and warmed up as the hostess grabbed ten menus for our large group
.
“It’s freezing out there,” the hostess said. “I almost froze to death walking from the bus stop.”
“It’s brutal outside,” I agreed. The hostess gestured for us to follow her behind two red velvet curtains that were pulled back. Two tables had been pushed together to seat all ten of us.
“And to think you’re ditching me for Bermuda early,” Brandy pouted, pretending to scowl.
“Bermuda?” the hostess asked. “That sounds amazing.”
“I’m pretty excited,” I confessed, taking a seat in the middle of the long table.
“She’s getting married there,” Brandy informed her.
“Wow. That’s going to be so cool. I’ve never been anywhere tropical. Maybe after college.” She grinned.
“It does seem like a lot of fun happens once a person graduates,” I promised her.
“I’m hoping so. Your server will be over in a moment, and I’ll bring your other guests back. Is there anything I can start you with?”
“A decaf tea would be great. Thanks.” I glanced around the room that overlooked the bustling sidewalk. There were two sections in this restaurant, and I’d hoped we’d get this one facing the street. The other room was a little more private, but it felt like a cave sometimes, and after my earlier meltdown, I didn’t want to feel stuffy or overheat in front of my potential in-laws.
I placed the bag containing the present by my feet so I didn’t accidentally blurt out something to Ayden’s mom. That was a nasty habit of mine. I’d get so excited about the gift that I’d want to share it immediately, which was why I procrastinated when it came time to shop for birthdays and Christmas.
“Doesn’t it smell amazing?” Brandy sniffed in and shut her eyes.
I wasn’t sure which of us was actually expecting by the look of ecstasy on her face.
“It does. It’s always good to go to eat plates of pasta before a beach vacation.”
She opened her eyes. “At least you have an excuse.”
“I have no idea what you’re talking about.”
My phone buzzed and I slid it out of my purse. It was a text from Ayden.
“Ayden’s gonna be late. He’s trying to finish something up at the office. Having so much time off for his shenanigans really made things pile up, and now we’re headed out of town.”
Beyond Promise Page 13
