by Sara Daniell
I sat there for a minute, processing it all. I chewed on the inside of my cheek as I looked at him. “So why do you think you aren’t anything, Zach? You’re obviously super smart and good with money. You run a successful debt-free business and have plans to expand. I don’t get it. It’s not like you are broke, on drugs, or doing nothing with your life. Why are you so hard on yourself?”
“None of it was mine, Hales. I bought an already successful business from friends of the family. I didn’t earn the money I have; I got it from my parents. I guess it’s hard to see myself as a success when none of it was originally mine. Plus, my past sometimes clouds my view of myself.”
“That makes sense.” I looked at the clock on his nightstand. “I need to run home and talk to my parents about Thanksgiving break and something else” I knew I was gonna have to be at Coach’s a lot, and I wanted to be there for Zach out in the open. Keeping this a secret just wasn’t going to work. Things were about to get stressful enough.
He kissed me. He looked around the room. “Be thinking about what to do in here. It’s the first room getting worked on after the outside is finished. We may need to get Trevor and Dane’s help. They’re both better at this stuff than I am.”
I nodded and stood. “Zach, I’m gonna tell my parents about us.”
His eyes widened in shock. “You are?”
“Yeah. That’s the something else I mentioned. With everything going on with Coach it’s just going to be a headache to keep this a secret. If I need to quit the team so you can keep coaching for Elliot, I will. I just want to be there for you and not have to sneak around to do it.”
He stood up quickly. “You’re not quitting. If it comes down to it, Quinn can coach; she knows a lot about baseball, or they can hire someone new. You’re not messing up your future plans because of me.” He kissed me. “But I’m glad you’re telling your parents. I don’t want to have to sneak around either. I want to be able to be with you and not be worried someone will find out.” He kissed my forehead. “Do you want me to come?”
“No. This is going to shock the hell out of them. They still think I’m with Dane.”
“If you need me, call me.”
“I will. I’m going to see if Dane will come with me. They will probably be calm if he’s around.” I got my phone out of my back pocket. “Do you need me to give you a ride back to Coach’s?”
“No, I’m going to stay here and get some things handled with the construction team. I’ll call Quinn to come get me later.” He picked up the picture and keys and handed them to me. He went back to the dresser drawer and pulled out some more pictures. “Here are the rest of the photos. It’s fully furnished, but if you don’t like something tell me, and I will have it changed.”
“Zach, I’m honestly not a picky girl. I don’t need to change a thing. I’m just shocked, and it means so much that you did this for me. Now, I’ll have to teach you to surf.”
“Sounds like a great idea.” He grinned, showing me his dimple for a split second. “You should get going, Tiger.”
I kissed him quickly then left the cabin. I called Dane on my way home.
“Hey, I need a favor. Is Trevor still there?” I asked when Dane answered.
“Yeah. Do you want to talk to him?”
“No, but I need a huge favor from you. Can you come over for dinner tonight?”
“Sure. But can I ask why?”
“Zach is going to need me now more than ever, Dane. I should tell my parents about our breakup and that I’m with Zach. It’s going to be too complicated to really be there for him if we are trying to sneak around. The less drama, the better. He needs to be able to focus on Elliot and not on sneaking around with me.”
“Well this will be an interesting dinner, but I got your back.”
“I’ll text you with the details. Thanks, Dane. I owe you.”
“It’s what best friends are for. See ya tonight.”
I hung up and turned up the radio. Interesting dinner? I could think of a thousand other words that could describe what the dinner would be like.
One big fuck-fest.
I picked around my food the entire dinner. I barely spoke the entire time. I wanted my parents to enjoy their meal and actually eat it. If I had mentioned Zach while we were eating, the food would have gone cold and probably would have ended up on the dining room walls.
When Dad pushed his plate to the side, I took that as my cue to talk. Dane gave my shoulder a light squeeze. I nodded at him.
“Dad? Mom?”
They both looked at me with smiles. I held my breath I was so nervous.
“Dane and I broke up. We’re still best friends though.”
They looked at Dane and then back to me.
“Well it’s good that you’re still friends, but can I ask why? I thought things were good,” Dad said, his forehead wrinkled with confusion.
“They were, and they still are. But I’m with someone else. I was with someone else before Dane, and I kept it from you guys because I knew you wouldn’t approve. I was scared to tell you so I kept it a secret. Dane and I tried to date after he broke things off, and it just wasn’t what either of us needed. Things came into place for me, and this other guy and I are trying to be together again.” I kept my eyes on my parents. I didn’t look away or blink once. I had to read their every move and expression.
I couldn’t read them though. They were blank. I looked at Dane. He nodded encouragingly and squeezed my hand a bit. Dad cleared his throat and crossed his arms in front of his chest as he sat back in his chair.
“Who is it, Hales?”
Mom reached over and touched Dad’s arm in an attempt to keep him calm, but by the look on his face that wasn’t going to help.
“This is where it gets complicated. I know you guys will not approve, but I want you to hear me out before you completely flip.”
They both stared at me, waiting.
I swallowed hard. “Zach Shaw. The assistant coach. I know you’ve heard things about him, and I know you both are not crazy about him because of his reputation. But he’s such an amazing guy and just has a lot of things to work through. He’s been through so much. He’s really great. So great.”
“Honey, isn’t he older? Way older?” Mom asked calmly, keeping her hand on Dad’s arm.
“Yes. 26.”
Dad closed his eyes, and his face turned solid red. I grabbed Dane’s hand under the table and squeezed it.
“I would love it if you guys could support me and trust me. I will be with him no matter what you say or do. So please, don’t do anything stupid.”
“Stupid?” Dad yelled as he stood and slammed both fists on the table, making the dishes clatter against the wood. “What you are doing is extremely stupid and irresponsible! Dating a coach? Do you understand how bad this looks? Do you realize what a man that age wants from a girl your age? Do you honestly think he’s serious? This is probably some sick fantasy, and you are probably not the first young girl he’s fooled around with from the things I’ve heard around town!”
I looked at the table instead of meeting Dad’s eyes. I didn’t blame him for being angry. This did look bad for many reasons, but it was nothing like what it looked like on the outside.
“Dad, I swear to you, it’s not like that at all. He’s amazing, and if you’d just give him a chance, he could prove that to—”
“No!” Dad yelled. “Absolutely not! I will not condone this ever!”
“Dad,” I said, tears streaming down my cheeks. “He paid for my college. He truly cares. I wouldn’t—”
“You end this, or I will, Hailey!” Dad was shaking.
Mom had her face in her hands.
“What does that mean!” I yelled.
“Will both of you please stop it!” Mom yelled, looking up from her hands and at Dad. “She is eighteen-fucking-years-old for Christ’s sake! We are going to have to start trusting her to make decisions, or we will push her away just like before! I cannot go through that a
gain! It damn near killed us both having her hate us and not speaking to us! We cannot judge this situation by what we want to assume is happening. We will give him a chance. We will give them both a chance!”
I smiled a little and mouthed thank you to Mom.
“Oh, don’t thank me. I’m not happy about this either, but I will not be without my daughter ever again.” Mom stood and wiped tears from her eyes. “Craig, walk away from this dinner table before you say or do something you regret.”
Dad shoved his chair under the table and left the room with Mom. I heard their footsteps travel down the hall, and then their bedroom door slammed shut. I jumped a little. I put my head in my hands, resting my elbows on the dinner table, and groaned.
“Well that could have gone better.” Dane rubbed my back. “It’s Zach’s damn reputation. It sucks.”
“And he’s 26. The age difference does look bad.” I peeled my hands from my face and looked at Dane. “I don’t know what to do right now. Do I stay here, or do I leave for the night?”
“Up to you. Once they give him a chance, they’ll love him. Especially your mom. She’ll like how he treats you. But mentioning the college thing might not have been the best idea. Or maybe you should have told them he did it without you knowing it was him.”
“It just came out. But I do feel better getting this off my chest. I hated hiding it from them.” A few tears slipped down my cheeks. “You and I are good, right? Is this weird for you?”
He wiped my tears. “We’re fine, and honestly, no, it’s not weird for me. I’m happy for you, Hales. I like seeing you truly happy again. He makes you smile in a way that I couldn’t.”
“Promise me something?”
“Anything.”
“If Zach and I don’t work out and you and Sadie don’t and we don’t find anyone by 35, we find each other again? I don’t want to grow old alone.” I laughed. “Is that a weird request?”
He laughed. “No, it’s not weird. I promise if we don’t I will be there to grow old with you.” He hugged me. “But you and Zach are the real thing, Hales. You’ll make it.”
“I want you to find love too.”
“I have love. I have you as a best friend and this cute, little five-year-old that thinks I’m amazing. Who needs more than that?”
I laughed. “I’m not stupid; you have needs.”
He shrugged. “Maybe I will find someone one day. I don’t think Sadie and I are meant to be together.”
I gave him a half-smile. “You never know what can happen.” I stood. “I think I need to go for a run. I’m gonna call Zach and see what he’s up to.” We walked outside to Dane’s truck.
“A relationship can’t work out when you’re not in the same state and not going to the same college.” He gave me a hug. “I’m going to head home. Millie and I have a date. She’s having a rough time right now and doesn’t like me being gone too long.” He kissed my head. “See ya later, Hales.”
“Let me know if you need me. I plan on making a date with Coach soon. I need to spend more time with him. He doesn’t know it, but he saved me. He made me realize I’m so much more than skills. Him standing up to my dad means more to me than he’ll ever know. He taught me to stick up for myself.” Tears filled my eyes. “This is so unfair. I fucking hate cancer.”
“He’ll like spending time with you. And yeah it is. I finally get a family, and it’s hurting because of cancer. I swear I’m going to become a doctor and work on a damn cure.” He got into his truck. “Text me later if you need me.” Once I nodded, he started up the truck and pulled out.
I had a pretty great conversation with my mom. Not so much with Dad. He left saying he needed to clear his head before he talked to me. Dinner didn’t go well, but I never expected it to. I just hoped that Dad would come around and talk to me without blowing up again.
Mom was semi-understanding. She said she was going to take this a day at a time and see what happens. She gave me a long sex-talk and said she was making me an appointment to get me on birth control. I couldn’t tell her I was having sex with Zach, but I think she knew anyway. The best part of our conversation was her saying that she wanted to get to know Zach and see the side of him I care about so much. That one statement gave me hope and meant so much to me.
I finished drying my hair and called Zach.
“Hey, Tiger. How did it go?”
“It went from worse to better. My dad left the house and isn’t talking to me right now, but my mom is willing to give you a chance.” I held my phone to my shoulder with my ear and pulled up my jeans.
“I just got out of the shower. I went for a run to blow off some stress. I think you need to take me out on a date.”
“I’d like that. I will take you wherever you want, or we could go camping.”
“But you have to get stuff first, right?”
“Just come to the cabin.” He hung up.
I laughed and grabbed a bag to pack.
After packing and telling Mom what I was doing, she gave me one more awkward sex-talk, and I left.
WHEN I GOT to the cabin, Zach was waiting on the front porch for me. I got out of my car and grabbed my bag from the backseat. He kissed me and took my bag from me then laced my fingers with his.
“This way.” He led me through the house, out the back door, and down toward the lake. He made the turn to his private area.
When we made it to his secret spot, my mouth fell open. “No way!”
He had a fire pit area with lights strung in the trees. Just like something you’d see in one of my mom’s Better Homes and Garden magazines. There was a tent, a few beach chairs, and towels that hung on hooks screwed into a large tree. I looked at Zach and smiled.
“I thought you said you sucked at this kind of stuff.”
“I do. Quinn helped me. I told her what you said this place needed, and she told me how to do it.” He put my backpack inside the tent. “I have steaks on the grill.” He pointed to the large grill. “Drinks are in the cooler, and there are Twinkies.” He walked over to me and pulled me close to him. “Anything else you want?”
Tears filled my eyes. “This means so much to me, Zach.”
He ran his hand through my hair. “Really?”
“Yes. This shows me that you listen to me. You care enough to take the time to do something just to put a smile on my face. You have no idea how this makes me feel. I honestly can’t put it into words. You made a really stressful night into a really great one.”
“I’m glad.” He put his forehead to mine. “And I listen to everything you say. Even if I don’t respond.” He smiled and kissed my nose.
“So my dad is pissed, but my mom is going to give you a chance.” I followed him over to the grill. He flipped the steaks while I talked. “And my mom is making me an appointment with my doctor; she’s making me get on birth control which isn’t a bad idea.”
He chuckled. “No, it’s not.” He looked over at me. “I tend to lose myself around you.” He winked then put the steaks on plates.
I laughed; then it dawned on me. Oh. Fuck. “Ummm, Zach?”
“Yeah?” He turned and looked at me holding the plates. “What’s wrong?”
“That night in your truck,” I was on the verge of a breakdown, “please tell me you remembered to use a condom.”
He swallowed hard and paled a little. He swayed, and he looked like he was about to pass out.
“Zach, talk to me. Tell me you did.”
He put the plates down on the tray connected to the grill. He faced me again. “No, I didn’t, Hales. I—” He closed his eyes and sat down. “I’m sorry. I should have slowed things down to make it to the cabin.”
My heart fell to my feet. “Okay, but that was our first screw up. I’m sure it’s fine. Right?”
He grabbed my hand and pulled me so that I was sitting on his lap. He put his chin on the top of my head. “I hope so. I’m sorry, Hales.”
“We’re not gonna let this ruin our night. I’m sure it’s fine.
” I put a smile on my face and stood up. “Let’s not think about it. Okay?”
“Okay.” He smiled a little. He stood and grabbed our plates. “Do you want salad or anything? I can go make you one. I know how you like to at least try and balance things when I cook for you.”
I smiled, but it faded. I was trying hard not to think about it but just knowing there was a chance I could have gotten pregnant freaked me the hell out. I was overreacting. I needed to calm down. “Sure.” I sat down in a chair.
He squeezed my shoulder gently. “It’s going to be okay, Tiger. I’ll go fix you a salad. Why don’t you start eating? I’ll be right back.”
“No, I’ll wait for you.” I smiled up at him.
He leaned over the back of the chair and kissed me before heading back toward the house.
I got up and walked to the water. It really wasn’t a big deal. If I was, Zach and I would be fine. Or would we? We were just getting back together and figuring shit out. I was going to play for Tulane and then hopefully go pro. It’s everything I’d worked for. If I was pregnant, all of that would go down the drain. I closed my eyes and let out a heavy sigh. I couldn’t allow myself to obsess over it. I looked toward the path that led to the cabin. Zach should be back out by now.
I walked to the cabin and went in through the back door. I heard a loud crash and then Dad’s voice roaring from the other room. I ran into the living room and saw he had Zach pinned against the floor, plummeting his fist into Zach’s jaw.
“Dad! No!” I screamed and ran over to him.
He punched him again as I cried and tried to pull him away from Zach. Dad wasn’t paying a bit of attention to me, and without realizing it, he shoved me away, knocking me into the couch.
“Stop!” I pleaded.
Zach wasn’t fighting back, but after Dad shoved me away, he blocked Dad’s last punch and used his legs to push Dad off of him. He looked at me. “Are you okay?” His face was a bloody mess and swelling already.
