Heaven Cent

by Piers Anthony

  "A setting for a dream!" Dolph said. "This could be fun!"

  "I do not dream, of course," Marrow said, “because I am from the realm of dreams. But I know that many dreams are unpleasant. Let us hope that this setting is not for a dream borne by a night mare."

  "Yes," Dolph agreed, realizing that this adventure could become just as nasty as it could become fun.

  "Also, we must remember our mission. We are here to find the Heaven Cent. That may not be easy."

  "Maybe it's in one of these domes," Dolph said, glancing at his friend for the first time since entering the fascinating city.

  He stopped, amazed. Marrow Bones was gone; in his place stood a handsome living human man in a white suit.

  The man glanced back at him. "Is something wrong?" he asked with Marrow's voice.

  Was it Marrow, or was it some stranger imitating his voice? Dolph didn't know how to judge. If it was Marrow, he should tell the skeleton right away. But if it was a stranger, maybe he should pretend not to notice the difference, so that the man would think he had succeeded in fooling him. "Uh—" he said.

  "You look as if you'd seen a ghost," the man said. "And not a friendly one. What is the matter?"

  He had to say something—but what? Dolph wished he had some adult judgment so that he would know what to do. "Uh—" he repeated.

  The man extended a hand to him. "You seem about ready to faint; let me help—"

  Then the man's gaze fell on his own hand. His eyes seemed to bulge. "Uh—" he said.

  "Yeah," Dolph agreed.

  "Something's happened to my hand!" the man cried, horrified. "It's all covered with meat!"

  "Right," Dolph said. At least this was solving his problem of what to say.

  "My arm too! And my legs! I think I'm going to be sick!"

  "Sickening," Dolph agreed, reassured.

  The man touched his own arm. "But it's not real!" he exclaimed with vast relief. "My bones are still there!"

  "Not real?"

  "Feel my arm!" the man said, reaching for Dolph.

  Dolph retreated, then realized that it was better not to show fear. Gingerly he touched the arm.

  His fingers passed through the arm and touched cold bone. "It is you!" he cried joyfully.

  "Of course it's me!" Marrow replied. "Who else would it be!"

  "But you look just like a living man! It's awful!"

  Marrow went to stand facing a mirrorlike wall. "Appalling!" he agreed. "This is a dream brought by a night mare! How can you stand to look at me?"

  "It isn't easy," Dolph said. "But I think I can hold my breakfast down."

  "But at least it isn't real!" Marrow's hands were feeling his head. "There's no hairy skin on my skull, no loathsome eyeballs in my sockets, no grotesque tongue in my jaw. No fat clings to my body. I only look grotesque; I'm not really that way."

  "That's great," Dolph said, conscious of his own hairy bead, loathsome eyeballs, and grotesque tongue. What was he doing with all that stupid flesh on him?

  "It is all right for you, of course," Marrow said. "You're supposed to be that way. You would even look a bit strange in bare bones. But for me—what a horror!"

  "What a horror," Dolph said, feeling better.

  "I wonder—" Marrow stepped closer to the mirror wall and poked a fleshed finger at it. "—whether this too is illusory." The finger passed through the wall. "It is! That explains it! This whole city must be illusory!"

  Dolph touched a wall. His questing hand found nothing. Sure enough, it wasn't there. That explained how there could be a great fancy city on a deserted isle.

  "But am I changed?" he asked. He looked at his own hands. "I don't look different to me."

  "No, you are exactly as you were," Marrow reassured him.

  "But if you've changed the way you look, how come I haven't? I should look like a skeleton or something, shouldn't I?"

  "That is odd," Marrow agreed. "I can only conjecture that you are a Magician, so it has no power over you. But it is possible that it clothes all living things with flesh, and you are already fleshed, so it has no further effect. Perhaps it would be the same with genuine buildings, leaving them alone."

  "Some of these illusions may be real? We'd better watch how we walk into them, then."

  "Yes. Fortunately, we can stay on the streets and use the apparent doors to enter. That way we won't risk banging into anything solid."

  "But suppose the Heaven Cent is covered over by some illusion? How could we ever find it?"

  Marrow made a remarkably human type frown, lips and all. "I fear we shall have to do some very tedious checking, unless we can discover a way to abolish the illusion."

  That was what Dolph had been afraid of. "Then I guess we'd better get started. I sure wonder what all this illusion is doing here, though, when Grandma Iris is so long gone from here."

  Then they both stopped short. "Her missing talent!" Marrow exclaimed. "It came back here!"

  "It missed the old Isle of Illusion!" Dolph agreed. "This is where it feels at home!"

  "I had not realized that talents could do that," Marrow confessed.

  "Well, she's pretty old. Maybe she lost her grip on it. "

  "That may be the case. I am surprised she has not acted to recover it."

  Dolph considered. "Maybe she doesn't know it's here. I mean, it could be just about anywhere, and she didn't think to look here. If it's just my stupid sister watching the Tapestry, and not even watching now, 'cause she never sticks to anything long except bossiness, she wouldn't've told anyone, so they don't know."

  "Perhaps so," Marrow said. "I suppose it could become tedious watching another person's adventure constantly. Still, we ought to draw attention to the matter. I wonder if we could alert them?"

  "You mean, call on the minor?"

  "That does not seem to differentiate sufficiently, at this range. It merely focuses on one site in Castle Roogna, which is the Tapestry."

  "Yeah, it's a small mirror, and I never was too good at tuning them in. If I messed with it, I might lose Castle Roogna entirely. But how else can we call in?"

  "Perhaps—"

  Dolph wished he had a speed-up spell, to quicken that hollow skull's thinking process. He waited.

  “—if we set up a message," Marrow concluded.

  "Like a note on a piece of paper? They'd never see it because it would be too small."

  "A big note."

  "Oh."

  They got to work at the fringe of the region of illusion, collecting sticks and stones. Marrow's body changed oddly as he passed in and out of the illusion, one moment reverting to his normal bare bones, then becoming fleshed. At times he was part bones and part flesh.

  In due course they had laid out objects in a big pattern on the small beach, spelling out words: TELL IRIS. Actually it should have been Grandma Iris, but they didn't have enough material for a big word like that. When Ivy saw that in the Tapestry, she would surely tell someone, and when Grandma Iris learned of the phenomenal city back at her old haunts, she would understand. Then she could reclaim her magic talent, and all would be well again. Dolph had not yet found the Good Magician or even the Heaven Cent, but already he was accomplishing something!

  They paused for lunch. Dolph's sandwiches were gone, but he didn't really need them; he simply changed to an ant and consumed a segment of a leaf. He did not like green salad in ant form much better than he did in boy form, but anything would do when he was hungry enough. That was another thing he was learning during this adventure: there were times when it just wasn't worthwhile to be too fussy about food.

  Then they commenced their search for the Heaven Cent. They were not sure exactly what it looked like, but hoped they would know it when they found it. Dolph knew that in Mundania there was a small magic copper coin called a cent; it wasn't supposed to be worth much, but it was pretty when shined. He thought the Heaven Cent might be a very big, bright cent. Just how it would help him find the Good Magician he wasn't sure, but he would figure tha
t out when he got hold of it. The Magician's message made it clear that he needed the cent: SKELETON KEY TO HEAVEN CENT. This was the key made of a skeleton, so the cent had to be here. He hoped.

  The vast illusion covered the isle. They did not know in what building the cent might be, so they had to check each in turn until they found it. Because it might be covered by a wall, they had to poke their hands through the walls too, feeling for anything round. Mostly what they found was weeds: without the fantasy city, this island would be just a weed-ridden lump.

  The job soon became tedious. Dolph wished there were a faster, easier way to do it, but he couldn't think of any. He tried changing to hound form, so that his superior nose could sniff out the cent, but he didn't know what it smelled like, so that didn't help. He assumed eagle form, in the hope that his sharp eyes would pierce the illusion, but they only made its detail clearer. It was easiest to keep his own form, so mat he could use his hands to check for what he could not see.

  He stepped through one more wall—and spied a woman. She was tall and well proportioned in the adult fashion, with hair as black as midnight and skin as white as midday.

  Dolph jumped back through the wall. He remembered his experience with Vida Vila, who really wasn't bad once he had gotten to know her, but mat threat of mushy sniff had really turned him off. This new woman looked like the kind who was good at mush, so he was wary of her. Fortunately, she had been facing away from him, so had not seen him.

  He hurried across to where Marrow was working.

  "There's a woman!" he whispered to the living man that Marrow appeared to be. "Between the buildings!"

  Marrow considered. "Is she a real woman or an illusory woman?"

  Dolph hadn't thought of that. "I—don't really know. She looked real, but—" He shrugged.

  "She might be a monster, made to look human. I had better investigate."

  "Yes," Dolph said, relieved.

  They went to the region where Dolph had seen the woman, and poked their heads cautiously through the wall. There she was, moving along the wall further along, her hands poking into it. She seemed to be looking for something.

  "I shall approach her," Marrow said. "But I shall not divulge very much about myself until I know her nature. She could be dangerous."

  Dolph nodded agreement. The illusion made everything uncertain.

  Marrow stepped through, while Dolph watched from the wall. Marrow approached the woman. "Hello," he said.

  "Eeeek!" the woman cried, jumping.

  "Who are you?" Marrow asked.

  The woman backed away from him. "I didn't know anyone else was here! You alarmed me."

  "Or perhaps I should inquire what are you," Marrow said. "Are you what you seem to be?”

  "No. Are you what you seem to be?"

  "Not exactly. What is your name?"

  "Tell me yours."

  Marrow paused. "I am trying to ascertain whether you are dangerous. If you do not cooperate, I shall have to assume that you are."

  "That is exactly the way I feel about you," the woman said.

  "Then answer my questions, and I shall answer yours. What is your name?"

  "Gracile Ossein. Grace'l for short. What is yours?"

  "Marrow Bones. What is your nature?"

  "I am a skeleton. What is yours?"

  "1 am a skeleton. Where—"

  "Now I know you are trying to fool me!" she exclaimed. "You are pretending to be what I am!"

  "I suspect it is the other way around," Marrow said stiffly. "There are no female skeletons in Xanth."

  "There weren't until I stepped out of the gourd. I am the only skeleton stranded out here. Now what is your nature, really?"

  "Let us clasp hands, and we shall quickly verify each other's natures," Marrow suggested.

  "No! You may be a bone-crunching monster!"

  "As you may be," Marrow retorted. "If I had been that, I would have pounced on you from behind."

  She nodded. "True. Very well, we shall touch hands."

  They extended their hands. Slowly the two approached. Then they touched. Then they clasped.

  "You are skeletal!" they exclaimed together.

  Dolph decided it was safe to emerge from hiding. "She really is like you?" he asked.

  "Is this another of our kind?" Grace'l asked.

  "No," Marrow said. "He is human. The illusion does not affect him."

  Then they were happily talking. Dolph was immensely relieved to know that Grace’l was neither a monster nor a mushy woman. They explained what they were doing here, and Grace’l explained how she was looking for the gourd that she had stepped out from. "It was an accident; I only meant to travel to another setting, but I took the wrong exit and found myself in this strange place. At first I thought it was merely a new setting, and I walked through it, but then I realized it was not what it seemed, and I tried to go back—but I had lost the gourd. I have been here for days, trying to find it."

  "It's hard to find anything under all this illusion," Dolph agreed. "I don't know how long it will take us to find the Heaven Cent."

  "What does it look like? I may have felt it in my search."

  "We don't know. But maybe like a big bright copper mundane penny."

  "Mundane? What's that?"

  She had never before been outside the gourd; she had never heard of Mundania. They tried to explain, but she could not grasp it; it was too strange for her.

  Then, abruptly, the illusion vanished. The three of them were standing on the weedy island.

  "Grandma Iris took her talent back!" Dolph exclaimed.

  Indeed it was so. The two skeletons were revealed in their bare bones; each had spoken truly. Marrow was taller, but Grace’l more rounded. Still, Dolph wasn't certain he could tell them apart, if he were to see them singly. "How can you tell boy from girl?" he asked.

  The skeletons exchanged eyeless glances. "That is a trifle delicate to discuss," Marrow said.

  "Still, it is no secret," Grace’l said. "I have more graceful bones and one more rib than he does."

  "One more rib?" Dolph asked, surprised.

  "High G, the grace note," she said.

  Dolph remained baffled. "High gee?"

  "Prince Dolph has not been exposed to skeletal history," Marrow said. "Perhaps we should start from the beginning."

  "Very well," she said. "If you will help me look for the gourd, I will tell the tale."

  "We can look for the Heaven Cent too!" Dolph said. He had the feeling that the skeletons were about to get into a long and dull discussion of some kind, and he didn't want to waste all that time.

  "We shall all search for both," Marrow agreed. "With the illusion gone, it should not be difficult to find whatever we want."

  So they started the search, walking three abreast, with Dolph in the middle, and the two skeletons took turns explaining about the G rib.

  It seemed that long, long ago, when magic was new, the Demon X(A/N)th (or someone; Dolph wasn't quite clear about that) made the ordinary Land of Xanth for the ordinary creatures, and the gourd for the extraordinary creatures that the others could only dream about, and left the refuse to drear, unmagical Mundania. He put a kind of barrier around Xanth to keep the Mundanes mostly out, and sealed off the gourd realm by making it difficult for any ordinary creature to bring its body inside. In the very center of the gourd he made a fine cemetery, and there he put the first skeleton.

  But this skeleton got lonely, for there were no others of his kind. So the Demon took one of his ribs and broke it into pieces, and the pieces grew and became the first female skeleton, complete in every detail. However, the male was no longer complete, because he was missing that one rib. Thus the female had one more rib than he, and so it was ever since.

  The first two skeletons made beautiful music together, for their bones resonated each to a different key. Marrow could play over 200 notes, and Grace’l could play over 201 notes. It was the first skeleton's smallest rib that was missing, the one that played the
highest note. From that time on, the female always had the higher range, and could always top the male by one note. The male missed that note, but was satisfied to have the female play it for him, which she did when appropriate.

  "When is that?" Dolph asked.

  Now they were silent. "Uh," Marrow said at last, "when they want to reproduce."

  "You mean they play music to signal the stork?" Dolph asked, suddenly very interested. Maybe he could get a line on how flesh folk did it, too! If it was just a matter of playing a tune or singing a song, maybe a mushy (ugh!) love song—

  "Not exactly," Grace’l said, as diffident as Marrow. "We don't use storks; they are reserved for the living folk."

  "Oh? Then how do skeletons do it?"

  "You would not care to know," Marrow said.

  Now Dolph was sure that the process was similar to the one living folk used mat was secret from children. "Sure I would!"

  "It involves—mushy stuff."

  "Oh." What a wet blanket! Just when it was getting interesting, too. But he had sort of known it would be something like that, because adults were entirely too interested in mush. Maybe age turned their brains mushy. What a fate!

  They continued searching the isle, but neither gourd nor cent snowed up. "I fear the gourd has rotted," Marrow said. "None remain on the isle. But there should be many on the mainland."

  "The mainland?" Grace’l asked. "You mean there's more?"

  Dolph managed not to laugh. She really was innocent!

  "Yes, this is but one island, and not the largest," Marrow said. "Normal Xanth is actually a fairly extensive place, having perhaps as much room as the gourd."

  "Amazing!" she exclaimed. "I had no idea!" Then she turned to him. "How did you come to be here in Xanth?"

  "I got on the Lost Path, so of course was lost. A man from Xanth found me, and brought me from the gourd. I confess it was a strange realm out here, but once I came to know it I found it interesting, and decided to stay. Certainly it is better than returning to the Lost Path."

  Her skull nodded. "I suppose so. But you should be able to avoid the Lost Path now, if you return in the company of one who is not lost."

  "That is true," Marrow said. "But I have a duty here."

  "What duty is that?"