“Just in case,” she said while slipping on golden gloves she had removed from her locker.
“What are those?” Jake asked.
“They’ll allow me to hold the portal open. They make better devices, but these were easier to ‘borrow’ so I’ll have to make do.”
“Will it be difficult?”
“It’s gonna cost me some magical energy, so please try to hurry. But it’s nothing I can’t handle. Are you guys ready?”
“You think Eddie had any scabbards in his locker?” Jake said as he opened it.
“Maybe.”
After a quick search, Jake pulled an old leather scabbard out of the locker. He slid the sword into it, then strapped it across his back.
“I believe that’s meant to be worn around your waist,” Marian said.
“But it looks so cool like this.”
“It does look pretty damn cool,” Harris said, nodding.
“Let’s hope you don’t have to use it,” Ana said, handing Steve’s Binder Clip to Harris.
“Seriously.” Jake said. “You have a point. I’m a pretty strong guy, but I’ve never wielded a sword before. It’s probably not a great idea to fight a dragon without practicing a bit first.”
“All right guys,” Marian rubbed her golden gloves together, “get in, set up, conjure that asshole, and get out. Don’t waste time talking with him. He’s super-intelligent, super-powerful, and he will not be happy. The quicker you’re back here on Earth, the better.”
“You should probably do this, just so there are no mistakes.” Ana handed the dagger to Marian.
“No problem.” Marian spun the dagger around in her hand like a baton. “Titan!” She slashed at the sky like a samurai, opening up a portal that Jake was going to have trouble fitting through.
“Damn, it really was out of juice.” Marian gripped the sides of the opening with her gloves and stepped aside to allow the others to pass. “See you in a few!”
“Yikes,” Jake said. “That was tight. I barely got the sword through.” As he stood, his jaw dropped open.
Titan was surreal.
Everything was huge. Trees as tall as skyscrapers loomed over them. Even wildflowers loomed over them. It was as if they’d been shrunken down in their own world, if their own world had anything as magnificent as the massive castle dominating the horizon.
After gaping at the scenery for far too long, Harris snapped to and marched out about a hundred Earth feet from the portal. He drew a binding rune in a patch of bare dirt, and placed the binder clip on it. He began to draw the necessary runes in the air, being extremely careful to get every one of them right. As they began to glow, he studied each one, checking them for accuracy.
Everything looked good.
“Are you ready?” Ana asked.
“I think so,” Harris said with as much confidence as he could muster.
“All right. Let’s get ready to run back to that portal then.”
Harris took a position just outside the glowing runes.
In an even—although slightly shaky—monotone voice, Harris said, “Zoth-Avarex, I call you to this world.”
Nothing happened.
Harris held his breath as he waited for the dragon to appear.
Still nothing.
“What’s going on?” Jake looked flustered.
“I don’t know. It should have worked.”
“Try again?”
Harris closed his eyes and ran through the entire process he had learned at conjuring school. Draw the runes, check. He knew his runes were good; it was the one thing he excelled at in class. Say the true name of the being you wish to conjure, check? Maybe he had mispronounced the name? He tried to recall how the dragon pronounced it in the Conjuring Dome and on the TV interview.
“Zoth-Avarex, I call you to this world.”
Nothing.
Lift Off
The bubble-like protective shield melted into nothingness as the helicopter lifted into the air.
Silvia looked to the dragon, waiting for him to turn his head.
When his own wagging tail caught his eye, Silvia’s window of opportunity flung open.
Silvia had been a sprinter in high school. The only sport she had ever enjoyed was Track and Field. She hadn’t been good enough to earn a scholarship or anything, but she was pretty damn fast.
As if she was coming out of the blocks on the one hundred, Silvia took off toward the edge of the observation deck. She pumped her arms, palms open, while focusing dead ahead. She was more than half way there when she heard Zoth-Avarex’s strident voice.
“Hey!” he said.
Silvia kept running, willing herself to not look back.
“Xim!” she shouted as she approached the edge. “Now!”
An adorable flying baby sloth poked its head up over the lip. With one hand he gave Silvia a tiny thumbs-up, with the other he held what appeared to be a Persian carpet, which hovered at the Space Needle’s edge as if suspended by unseen strings.
The ground shook beneath Silvia’s sprinting feet. In spite of her plan, she glanced back and saw the dragon, enraged and moving toward her. The dragon’s leg smashed into the grilled cheese truck, sending it flying over the edge and plummeting to the ground more than five hundred feet below.6 As the helicopter crested what would have been the protective bubble, Silvia leaped onto the carpet.
But she had been too afraid of the dragon behind her, too afraid that she would be scooped up by a massive claw at any moment, and she misjudged her jump.
She landed on the carpet fine, but her momentum was too much. She tumbled across its plush surface, past the fringed end, and began to free fall.
Her hands stretched out in front of her as if to break her fall. The ground rushed up to meet her impossibly fast.
This was what it was like to die. She had no time to contemplate that fact, only time to be sure of its accuracy.
As she closed her eyes, images of Ana and Jake flashed through her mind.
She felt a heaviness in the pit of her stomach. Her head was woozy, as if she were on a spinning ride at the fair.
She should have already hit the ground.
When Silvia opened her eyes she saw Xim’s smiling face and felt the magic carpet underneath her.
The carpet had swooped down to scoop her up before taking off toward the city’s skyscrapers.
They zoomed past the grilled cheese truck, which was smashed flat inside the area that had been cordoned off.
Silvia looked up at the Space Needle in time to see Zoth-Avarex spread his vast wings and take flight.
He was looking right at her.
* * *
6 Luckily, no casualties were incurred here. The girls who worked at the grilled cheese truck had struck up fast friendships with the guys who ran the taco truck. At the time when the grilled cheese truck fell overboard, the girls were visiting the guys in the back of their truck. Two of them paired up and made out with each other, while the other two alternated between talking awkwardly, staring at nothing, and pretending something important was on their phonesA
AThe two who were making out had a one-night fling and were never romantic with each other again. The other two, however, ended up getting married to each other and starting their own food truck in which taco meat is added to grilled cheese sandwiches. It was an instant success.
The Castle
“What now?” Jake threw up his hands.
“I don’t know. I did everything right, I’m sure of it.”
“What if that’s not the dragon’s real name?” Ana said, face pointing at the dirt.
“Shit.” Harris immediately had the feeling that she was right. He thought back to the conjuring in the dome, trying to remember how it all went down.
“It ate that guy before he could tell everyo
ne its name.”
“Exactly,” Ana said. “So how do we find its true name?”
“I could run back through the portal and ask around?” Jake said, half offering, half asking. “Maybe Marian has an idea? Or maybe I could get it out of the management team? I could tell them I need it for official fire department business or something. I’ve bullshitted my way through worse. Marian’s boss does seem pretty gullible.”
“Okay,” Ana said. “Let’s go.”
“Well, no offense, but I think I’ll have a better chance if I go alone. You guys are brand new employees. I’ve been on Site a while, now. If I play up that I’m there in some kind of official capacity, I might be able to get farther.”
“All right,” Harris said. “Hurry up.”
“I’m hurrying.” Jake ran and dove into the portal, leaving his sword behind. He poked his head back out and said, “Wait here, I shouldn’t take long.”
“I’ll be wight back, too,” Xop said before flying off.
Harris and Ana were alone together for the first time.
“So . . .” Harris said, feeling exposed and awkward and wishing he had actually thought of something to say before opening his mouth. “Do . . . you have any other siblings?”
“Nope. Just Silvia. How about you?”
“I have a brother who’s still in high school. It must be nice to have your sister work out here, too. I’m dying to tell my little brother about all of this, but I can’t.”
“Scared of The Curse?”
“Yeah. Aren’t you?”
“I don’t know. Sometimes I doubt it’s real. Although I guess I’m not in a hurry to test it.”
Ana sat down and leaned back against a sturdy blade of grass.
“So, you like to read?” Harris fished for something they could have in common.
“Oh, yeah. I always have a book I’m reading.”
“Me, too.” Harris sat against a relatively close blade of grass. “What’s your favorite book?” He felt a rush of pride, having nailed that follow-up question.
“Probably The Princess Bride. How about you?”
“The Hobbit.” Harris grinned, remembering how he’d gotten the book. “I stole it from a party at some big house when I was, like, sixteen.”
“Okay, Liesel Meminger.” Ana grinned, too.
Harris didn’t understand the reference, but pretended he did. “Do you have any pets?” he said, trying to change the subject before she noticed.
“Yeah, I have two cats, who I’m really missing right now. I’m just glad my roommate is around to take care of them.”
“Oh, you have a roommate. Cool.” Harris had barely stopped himself from asking if it was a man.
“Yeah, he’s the best.”
Harris swallowed hard.
“He’s gay.” Ana shrugged.
“Oh, okay.” A warm relief washed over Harris. Was she giving him some kind of signal there? He was never any good at deciphering women’s signals.
“All right,” Ana said. “Enough with the easy questions.” She looked into Harris’s eyes. “What do you hate the most, and what do you love the most about the world?”
“Dang.”
“Come on! Let’s get deep, here.” Ana’s dimple was on full display.
“Well, I think the thing I hate the most is . . . assholes, or people with oversized egos.”
“Totally agree.”
“And the thing I love most is my family. I know that’s a cliché answer, but . . .”
“No. It’s perfect. Those are pretty much my answers, too.”
Harris felt like a kid again: being told “Good job” for something he’d actually done right.
“Okay,” Ana continued, “what is your best memory?”
Harris scratched his nose. He wished he had some trip to Machu Picchu or something cool like that to fall back on, but nothing cool came to the surface.
“Whatever it is,” Ana said. “Whatever pops into your head.”
“Well, I should probably pick something from my childhood, but the one that came to mind when you asked was the first time I. . . you know.” He mimed waving a wand up and down.
“What?” Ana’s forehead scrunched up.
“Yeah. Maybe that’s weird? But I just loved the way it felt in my hand. I felt powerful, like I had found the thing I’d been waiting for my entire life. Everything before then had just been a build-up to that one moment.”
“I can’t believe you’re admitting that.” Ana chuckled nervously.
“I’m not ashamed of it. I don’t think any of us should be. If done the right way, it can be a real force for good in the world.”
“Okay. . .”
“What about you?” Harris said. “How did you feel the first time you tried it?”
“I think this is getting way too personal.”
Recognition dawned on Harris’s face.
“Oh no!” he said, face redder than it had ever been. “I meant . . . magic . . . with a wand. Magic . . . ya know?” He mimed using a wand again, holding his hand differently this time to prevent any possible misunderstandings. He wasn’t sure why he hadn’t just said the word magic the first time. Maybe it was because he’d been conditioned not to talk about it outside school or the Site, or maybe it was because magic still didn’t seem completely real to him. His embarrassment felt like a kick to the gut.
Ana didn’t respond.
She stared at him, blank-faced.
Harris squirmed, wishing he could disappear.
Then, a goofy smile materialized.
Ana blurted out and doubled over with an intense belly laughter. She fell to her side and clutched her stomach. Her laugh was silly and wonderful and contagious. At several points she snorted, then kept on laughing. Harris couldn’t help but to crack up along with her.
“What the hell is going on, here?” Jake’s voice said from above.
“Oh, nothing,” Ana said between chuckles.
Xop zipped out from behind a flower with an adorable smile.
“What did you find out?” Harris said, trying to look serious.
“Nothing.” Jake shook his head.
“Shit.”
“Well, what do we do now, then?” Ana said, stifling a giggle.
“We could try that castle.” Jake pointed.
“I think that’s a good idea,” Harris said. “Maybe we could find some kind of clue there? It’s a long shot, but what other options do we have right now?”
Harris pocketed the binder clip and Jake picked up the sword. The three of them power-walked toward the castle. Xop rode on Harris’s shoulder, which Harris was really beginning to enjoy.
After a few wordless minutes, Ana pointed to their left and held up her other hand as an indication to stop.
Ants, as big as chihuahuas, marched in a line through towering blades of grass. Some of them carried pieces of cut leaves as big as dinner tables. Harris shuddered at the size of their mandibles. Had they wanted to, they could easily take off a finger, probably even a hand.
Ana padded to her right and the others followed. Luckily, the ants either didn’t detect them or decided to leave them alone.
Minutes later, a buzzing noise filled the air, increasing in intensity until it was directly overhead. A giant bee, as big as an eagle, lit on a giant flower just above where they stood. The tip of its knife-like stinger protruding from its striped abdomen made Harris shudder again.
When the bee took off from the flower it quickly lost altitude. It was headed straight for the group. The humans scattered like cockroaches and dove behind cover.
The bee continued on its path as if it had never noticed the terrified people.
Everyone but Xop stood and brushed themselves off. Without comment they trooped toward the castle, keeping their heads on constant swi
vels.
Harris’s mind felt as if it was trying to go a hundred places at once. Was some sort of giant animal going to crush or eat them? What could the dragon’s name really be? Did Ana have any interest in him? Did that embarrassing misunderstanding help or hurt his chances with her? Was this mission doomed? What was going to happen after they got back? Would they all go their separate ways? He sure hoped not. These people had become very important to him very quickly. He hoped they felt the same about him, but he doubted it. He wished he could somehow prove himself to them. He had thought the conjuring was going to be his chance, but that hadn’t gone as planned.
Maybe it was the fact that he felt so small on Titan, like a bug in a jar, but Harris began to get the feeling that he was being watched. He scanned the horizon, but couldn’t detect anyone watching him. He saw no ducks, either.
Then it hit him.
He had the uncanny notion that he was no more than a character in a story.
He thought back to the last few days and how unbelievably bizarre they were. This couldn’t all be real, could it? Was he dreaming? It didn’t feel like a dream, but it didn’t feel like reality, either.
Harris stopped and looked straight ahead. He began to speak to nothing, as if an invisible movie camera was in front of him, as if trying to smash an imaginary fourth wall like an underwhelming wrecking ball.
“You don’t understand that you’re the one who has the power to stop this dragon,” he said. Again, to absolutely no one.
“What the hell are you talking about?” Jake said.
“I’m just. . . trying something.” Harris turned back to no one. “You simply can’t imagine that one person could be that important.” He paused in the most dramatic fashion he could. “You have to give the dragon a new name. You’ve already chosen it, you just have to call it out.”
“All right,” Jake said. “We’ve lost Harris.”
“Call his name!”
Harris tilted an ear to the heavens.
“Please, save us.”
Everyone was silent as Harris listened to the sky in anticipation.
The Conjuring of Zoth-Avarex: The Self-Proclaimed Greatest Dragon in the Multiverse Page 16
