by Beth Wiseman
She shook her head. “Nett since your suggestion.” Adam had pointed out that she fretted more when she constantly tallied her sales. He challenged her to wait to count it again until the morning of the auction. It took restraint, but she followed his advice. She didn’t even keep a mental tally.
Behind them, the Bowmans’ horse whinnied as their buggy entered the driveway. Rosa jumped off the fence and waved as she and Adam crossed the drive.
“Hiya,” Rosa said.
Adam greeted Stephen as he climbed off the bench.
“Stephen and James wanted to check out Adam’s horses.” The girls clambered out from the back and the women meandered to the house. Adam, Stephen, and James headed toward the corral.
Once inside, Rosa gave the girls some paper to draw on while she and Hope chatted over tea. Rosa hadn’t seen her friend since Hope’s mother took ill. “Is your mamm better?”
“She isn’t coughing as much.”
“That’s gut to hear.”
“And I hear your chickens are still laying a lot of eggs.” Hope sipped her tea.
“More every day. I’ve been able to sell them all too. Danki for passing the news.”
Hope shook her head. “I’ve been so busy with mei mamm, I haven’t spoken to anyone but Becky Byler when she came over to babysit.”
“That’s odd. Lately everyone in the district has needed extra eggs.”
“Probably for the bake sale.”
“When is the sale?” Rosa had been preoccupied, but she would certainly find time to bake for the sale. Most of the sales benefited a family who had health care burdens or who had lost their home in a fire. She hadn’t heard about any families that had fallen on hard times.
“The sale was today. I dropped off some pumpkin pies on the way to mei mamm’s.” Hope reached across the table for Rosa’s hand. “I’m sorry I’ve been tied up so much with Mamm and we haven’t had much time to talk. Is there anything I can do for you?”
The men entered the kitchen. Stephen smiled at Hope. “James nau owns his first buggy horse, fraa.”
Rosa’s heart skipped. “Flapjack?”
Adam nodded. “He still needs several more weeks of training to get him road ready, but James wants to help me work with him.”
“We should head home, fraa,” Stephen said.
Hope nodded and walked her cup to the sink. “I’ll talk with you soon,” she said to Rosa before leaving.
Adam waited until the Bowmans left before showing Rosa the wad of cash. “It isn’t the entire amount you need, but it should help.” He added the money to the jar. “I told you I didn’t want to move mei horses.”
She didn’t want him to find a new place for his horses either. “I don’t know what to say.”
“Just praise God.”
“Praise God, indeed.” Rosa peered at the jar. “Should we count it nau?”
Adam shook his head. “You only have a few more days to wait. God will provide.” He motioned to the door. “I need to tend the stock, but maybe afterward we can have kaffi and a cookie?”
She nodded. “I’ll make a fresh batch.”
Rosa mixed up Adam’s favorite peanut butter cookies. The first batch was cooling on the counter and another pan was in the oven when someone tapped on the door. Eunice and two women from the widows’ group stood on the stoop.
“We wanted to give you this,” said Mrs. Lehman, the shortest of the three. She extended an envelope toward her.
Rosa peeled open the flap and removed the cash contents. “I don’t understand.”
Eunice stepped forward. “You know how the widows’ group enjoys working together on a project. These are the funds we raised from our bake sale.”
“From your eggs,” Enos Mast’s widow said.
Rosa caught a glimpse of Adam as he came out from the barn. The moment their eyes connected, he ducked back inside. Rosa looked at Eunice. “Did Adam say something to you?”
“He mentioned you had too many eggs and sort of suggested that we buy them.”
“That’s why none of you would accept them for free? You felt obligated to pay for them?” Adam’s good intentions settled in Rosa’s stomach like a rock at the bottom of a pond. “Did he suggest you have a bake sale too?”
“Nee,” the women said in unison. “That was our idea.”
Rosa stared at the money.
Dorothy Lehman patted her hand. “You’ve been so gut to all of us, giving us eggs when you could have sold them. We wanted to help you.”
“We don’t have husbands to look out for us, but we have each other.” Adam’s mother squeezed Rosa’s arm. “You’re a member of our group.”
Rosa smiled, and suddenly her skewed view of being a widow shifted. It wasn’t a life sentence of loneliness. Loneliness was not sharing herself with others. Perhaps God was leading her to embrace being one of them.
“Maybe you could kumm to our next get-together,” Eunice said.
“Ya,” Rosa said without reservation. “I’d like that.”
Chapter Fifteen
On the morning of the tax deadline, Rosa emptied the jar onto the table and sorted the money. Adam counted bills and she counted the change. Once they finished, she tallied the amount.
Twice.
Adam slid his chair back. “Money must have dropped on the floor.”
It hadn’t, but she didn’t stop him from searching.
“Let’s count it again,” he said.
Numbness settled into her core. She had fully expected that the needed amount would miraculously be there. Just as he had. “We already recounted.”
Adam rechecked the count, then slumped farther down in his chair. He rubbed his eyes. “I can’t believe it.”
Neither could she.
Like a hammer driving a nail, Adam had repeated over and over: Have faith. Just have faith.
But faith had failed her.
She got up and went to the sink—not because she was thirsty, but because she needed space around her. She needed to find a way to silence the voices in her head.
“Rosa.” Adam crossed the room and gathered her into his arms.
She twisted away from him. “Take the money you gave me from selling the horse.”
“We can worry about that later.”
“Later?” She stared at him. “Don’t you understand? There is no later. Time is up.” She sighed. “I should have been packing all along.”
“There’s a chance no one will bid on the property. We can always hope—”
“Hope?” she said. “I’m fresh out of hope.” She couldn’t even bring herself to apologize for her lack of faith.
“All I’m saying is, it wouldn’t be unlike God to—”
“Adam, I’d like to be alone.”
He stared at her a moment “It’s nett over, Rosa. You’re still working your way up the mountain.”
“What’s that supposed to mean?”
“Remember when God commanded Abraham to sacrifice his son Isaac? God provided a ram as a substitute for the boy. But it was on the top of the mountain. Not at the bottom.”
Adam left, and Rosa sank down at the table to give over to her despair. She cried until she had no tears left. She didn’t know how long she sat there, or whether she dozed, only that when she sat up and looked around again, the day seemed half gone.
She was alone. The house was quiet. But Adam’s final words still echoed in her ears. Abraham. Isaac. The mountain. The ram.
She reached for her Bible and turned to the story in Genesis.
Isaac spoke up and said to his father Abraham, “Father?”
“Yes, my son?” Abraham replied.
“The fire and wood are here, but where is the lamb for the burnt offering?”
Abraham answered, “God himself will provide the lamb.”
Three days later, Adam was dumping a wheelbarrow full of horse manure on the compost pile when he spotted the mail truck pull up to Rosa’s house. Why was the driver hand-delivering the mail?
Adam wasn’t sure she would welcome him inside. Since the day of the auction, she had kept her distance. But he decided to risk it. He left the wheelbarrow upended and headed for the house.
Adam tapped on the door. No answer. He knocked harder this time. When she still didn’t answer, he let himself inside. His stomach knotted. Obviously she’d been busy. Boxes lined the walls of the sitting room.
He found her sitting at the kitchen table with her face buried in her hands and a letter open before her. “Are you okay?”
She didn’t look up or even answer.
He caught a glimpse of the letterhead on the official-looking form: County Tax Claim Bureau: NOTICE TO VACATE. He didn’t need to read any more.
“Rosa?” he said.
No response.
“I, um . . .” He cleared his throat, but words wouldn’t come.
She lifted her head and stared at him with bloodshot eyes. “You need to unload the hay in the barn and move your horses.” She stood, reached for the jar of money on her counter, and thrust it at him. “Take out what’s yours. Apparently it’s God’s will for me to move to Ohio and live with mei aenti.”
“This isn’t how—” He wiped his clammy hands against his pant legs. “You don’t have to.”
She waved the eviction notice in his face. “What choice do I have?”
He swallowed hard. “You can stay and . . . marry me.”
Her eyes closed and she shook her head slowly. Then she pushed her chair away from the table and stood.
Adam followed her out of the kitchen. She stopped at the door, opened it, and motioned for him to exit. He paused in the threshold. “I don’t want you to move to Ohio.”
“Your loyalty to Uriah is commendable,” she said. “To think you would feel such indebtedness.”
He rubbed the burned side of his neck. Indebtedness? Is that how she saw it? A debt that needed to be settled, the price Uriah had paid to save Adam’s life?
She shut the door behind him and left him standing alone on the stoop. He felt empty, hollowed out. His legs trembled under him, and he sat down on the top step.
“God,” he said, “I don’t understand any of this. I assumed You were providing the money to pay her taxes when the chickens over produced. Like a fool, I even assured Rosa that was Your plan. Please forgive me.” He got up and stalked toward the barn, kicking at a stone in his path. “I messed up mei proposal too. She thinks I’m doing it out of obligation. God, You know that isn’t the truth. Can You somehow talk to her for me?”
A raw November wind chapped Rosa’s face as Blossom trotted along the road. But she didn’t care; maybe the drive and the cold and the damp would help clear her head.
“Lord, please forgive me,” she prayed out loud as she drove along. “I trusted and relied on Adam’s faith instead of standing on mei own faith in You. He wasn’t wrong to believe—but I was wrong to believe in his word rather than seeking Yours. I accept Your will for my life and I will move to Ohio. I only ask that You help me make amends with Adam before I leave.”
The road in front of her blurred as tears welled in her eyes. “I never realized just how attached I had become to him.” She wiped her face with the back of her hand. “I’ve—well, I might as well admit it—I’ve fallen in love with him. But, Lord, how could I marry him when I know I can’t have children? I would only disappoint Adam.”
Rosa took the long way home and returned to find a note stuck in her doorjamb. When she unfolded the paper, money fluttered to her feet. She bent down to pick it up. The note said that the money was to buy eggs for another upcoming bake sale the widows had planned.
She glanced next door. Eunice’s buggy was parked in its usual spot. This was as good a time as any to take the eggs next door and return the money. Rosa packed more eggs than requested into a container and headed to Adam’s house.
Eunice opened the door. “I see Adam gave you mei note.” She waved her in. “Have a cup of tea with me. I’d like to talk with you about a few things.”
Rosa hesitated.
“Adam’s not here, if that’s what’s concerning you.”
“All right. Maybe a half a cup.” She followed Eunice into the kitchen. “I just thought of it nau, but I have extra flour and sugar I’d like to donate to the bake sale.”
“That would be great.” Eunice dunked a tea bag in one cup, then transferred the bag over to the next one. She set the cups on the table. “I would like to apologize,” she said. “I was selfish when I talked so adamantly about wanting kinskind.” She paused for a moment. “I thought you and Adam were growing close and, well, I know you’ve had miscarriages in the past.”
“Four,” Rosa clarified. It wasn’t a secret, nor did it matter now.
Eunice sighed. “I thought if I discouraged you from becoming involved, mei sohn would—”
“You don’t have to worry any longer.” Rosa set her cup down and stood. “I’m moving to Ohio.”
“Rosa, I was wrong to interfere.”
“I have to finish packing.” Rosa got up and rushed blindly to the door—and bumped directly into Adam.
He kept her from falling but said nothing.
“Danki.” She rushed across the yard and into the house, gasping for air. Surely this would all be over soon. Surely the feelings she had for Adam would subside once she had moved.
Minutes later Adam stood on her stoop. Hands deep in his pockets, he shuffled his feet. “Mei mamm sent me. She said something about flour and sugar.”
Rosa opened the door wider and stepped aside. “Come in.” She took a few long strides to the kitchen with him trailing behind her and opened the pantry. Almost all the canning jars were gone, but some of the staples still lined the shelves. “Flour,” she mumbled, grabbing the ten-pound bag.
“Rosa.”
His husky voice caught her off guard and she turned.
“After Uriah pulled that burning rafter off me in the fire, he made me promise him that I would take care of you. But that isn’t why I asked you to marry me.” He reached for her hand. “I love you, Rosa.”
“Adam . . .” Her voice shook. I love you too, she wanted to say, but the words wouldn’t come.
“I thought you shared the same feelings for me.” He rubbed his neck. “Mei scar reminds you that I’m the reason you lost Uriah. He should’ve survived, nett me.”
At last she found her voice. “I don’t blame you for Uriah’s death. Please believe that.” Rosa lowered her head. “I have fallen in love with you too.”
“Then marry me.”
Her heart screamed yes, but she shook her head no. “I’ve had four miscarriages. That’s why Uriah took me into town for ice cream all those times, to try to cheer me up. But you need to know. I can’t carry a boppli.” She swallowed hard. “I saw the pain it caused Uriah. I won’t put you through that.”
He inched closer. “If you want children, we can adopt.”
“You say that, but—”
“I mean what I say.” He cupped her face in his hands. “Last year you did all that research about foster families for Hope. Why can’t we be a foster family?”
She opened her mouth to respond, but his kiss hushed her words.
“I love you,” he said, his warm breath feathering against her cheek.
“I love you too.”
Adam trailed kisses across her cheek to her ear. “Will you marry me?”
She pulled back. “Your mother wouldn’t approve. She wants—”
“She wants what’s best for me. And that’s marrying you.” He swept his hand over her cheek. “Rosa, say that you’ll marry me.”
“Yes.” Tears clouded her vision. “Yes, I will marry you.”
He twirled her around the kitchen, then kissed her again.
They were interrupted by a knock on the door. Rosa pulled away. “I better see who it is.” She adjusted her dres
s as she walked to the door.
Adam followed.
Tate Wade stood on the other side of the screen door.
“Can I help you?” she said.
“I wanted to talk to you about your house,” Tate said. “I’m the one who bought it.”
Rosa motioned to the boxes stacked against the far wall. “As you can see, I’m packing. I’ll be out in—”
“Wait.” He held up his hand. “Please hear what I have to say. I’m willing to sell it back to you. For the same price as I paid.”
Rosa glanced at Adam.
“Mr. Bontrager,” Tate said, “I couldn’t get it out of my mind, what you told me about Rosa being a widow and the eggs being her only support. Growing up, I watched my mother struggle after my father died. There were days we had very little to eat.” His focus returned to Rosa. “I’m sorry for the pain I’ve caused you. I hope you can forgive me.”
Rosa stared at him for a minute or two. “Apology accepted.”
“Good. The guilt was eating me up.” He exhaled a pent-up breath. “So, do you want to buy the place or not?”
“Yes! I want it.” She glanced at Adam, then back to Tate. “I mean, we want it.”
“Fine.” He nodded. “I buy houses at auction all the time. I’m a real estate developer, so we can work out the paperwork later. I’ve reinforced the kennel so my dogs won’t get out again. And I’ll reimburse you for your chickens. I hope from now on we don’t have any neighborly issues.”
He turned to leave, then stopped and faced her. “One more thing. The property is currently zoned commercial. Apparently at one time it was a dairy business. If you petition to have it rezoned, you’ll cut your taxes to a fraction of the cost. Buy some cattle and have it zoned under agriculture, and you’ll save even more.” He nodded. “Well, I’ll be off. I hope you both have a good day.”
When Tate was gone, Rosa closed the door and turned to Adam. “Can you believe what just happened?”
“It’s a miracle.” Adam pulled her into his arms. A glint of light danced in his eyes. “Tate said guilt changed his mind, but what really happened is that God softened his heart.”
She swiped at her eyes. “And God provided a way to keep the haus, even after mei faith failed.”
