by Martha Woods
“I'm glad I did, too,” I said. “And yes. It turns out our fraught relationship with humans has also been responsible for some pretty fraught relationships among dragonkind. See, I'm sort of a leader among our people. The king of a proud and noble dragon faction known as the Protectors. Once, long ago, it's said that my people and humans used to live side by side in harmony with one another. Things were peaceful among us, and our races flourished in our coexistence.
“It was a long-lived peace, but it hasn't survived well into modern times. For decades, centuries now, human beings have feared us, hunted us and killed us. Driving our numbers further and further down, and forcing us into hiding, in the hope that at least some remnant of us might at least survive.”
“That's horrible,” she said, and I saw that it was a look of genuine horror on her face, not just an act. My pain, in other words, was really her pain– not a reaction I honestly expected to find when standing face to face with a human.
“Yeah, well... I agree with you. But so does another faction of our kind. The Dark Ones, they call themselves. A race that thrives on the tapping of dark energy, and the more violent energies of our race. For the Protectors, our only hope of surviving, and avoiding all out warfare, has been to simply avoid human society, and lie as low as we can in the hopes of surviving for another generation.
“But the Dark Ones... They have other ideas. They don't want to lie low anymore. They don't want to be seen as inferior anymore, or even as equals to humans. According to their point of view, dragons, and Dark Ones in particular, are the superior race. They believe they have a right to lord themselves over humankind, to seek revenge for all the years of oppression you've subjected us to.”
At that moment, I thought I saw her backing away slightly, as though afraid that I, too, might share this view.
I promptly shook my head, hoping to assure her of the contrary.
“I don't see things that way. In an ideal world, I would like things between dragons and humans to go back to how they once were. But there's a risk to that. Because we really only get one shot at revealing ourselves, and if your people decide they don't want to take kindly to us, there's no way we can hide ourselves again like we did before. Do you see what I mean?”
“I think so,” she said with a nod. “And I'm sorry that we've put you through all of that...”
“It's not all of you. And I don't know, maybe things would be different nowadays. But either way, the Dark Ones have made it their mission to reveal itself to humankind in as violent a manner as possible, so that there really is no way your people can ever see us as anything short of monsters after that.
“And that's why we were fighting last night. The Dark Ones have been plotting for months now to try and claim the throne of the Protectors, in order to make their nightmarish vision a reality. They're pretty deluded, but even they know that they can't enact their plans would blow up in their face if they tried to set them in motion without consolidating their power.
“My men and I have been trying to stave them off for months, but we honestly don't have any clue at this moment how much longer we can hold them at bay. The situation has gotten... Worrying, to say the least.
“I'm very sorry that you had to get mixed up in all of this. But I'm very grateful to you for getting me out of there when you did. I mean... Like I said, I don't know whether a lot of people would have done what you did, if they were in your situation. So, thank you.”
Melina smiled at me. A sweet, warm, gentle smile. Then she nodded.
“I try to help people when I can. I've built my whole life around trying to help people. But after hearing what you just told me, this might be the first time I've felt like anything I did actually made any kind of a real difference. So... Really I'm just glad I could help. And I'm really glad you're okay.”
A strange, intense moment passed between the two of us. A moment, like that of our eyes meeting for the first time that previous evening. Something was stirred, deep inside me. Something I didn't want to give a name to, but which I couldn't pretend I didn't understand.
It was said, among our people, that the presence of one's soulmate could evoke such a strange pull. The often, the onset of such emotions would happen in unexpected ways, under unexpected circumstances, but that the pull between two individuals who experienced it would be nothing short of irresistible.
As I stared into this woman's eyes, that was the very sensation I felt, and needless to say, it confused me on a fundamental level. In my mind, the possibility that any such connection could be experienced between a dragonshifter and a human being seemed beyond comprehension. And even if the notion wasn't wholly bizarre in and of itself, I knew that it was a temptation I couldn't possibly indulge, no matter how badly I might or might not have wanted to.
I mean... Come on! This was a human!
The Dark Ones had just tried to murder me for suggesting that I should treat this foreign race with anything less than the utmost contempt and hostility. How the hell did I think my people, as well as my enemies, would react to find me falling for a human female? Something that, to my knowledge, had never taken place among our respective people, at least not for as many generations as anyone living could remember.
I tried to force my eyes away from this woman. Tried not to let myself be tempted by her. But then I saw that she, too, was looking down shyly. Like she felt the same thing that I did, and was too embarrassed to admit to the fact. But then, her own shyness made me want to fight against the hesitation I felt. I wanted to reassure her, to encourage her, to talk her into what I myself knew couldn't possibly take place.
I studied her. Her smooth, soft skin. Her dark eyes. Her sleek black hair. Her slender body, and the aura radiating off of her. An overwhelming gentility, but with a strength to it. A spirit, I could tell, that was resilient. That wouldn't surrender without a fight when push came to shove.
I almost let myself imagine it. What it would be like, to fall in love with such a woman. To taste her mouth on mine.
I thought about what kind of mother she would be, and what kind of Queen...
But then, suddenly, she looked up at me again, and I shook the thought from my mind at once. It was the vulnerability in her eyes. The level of trust I saw in them. I thought she would trust me, if I tried to lead her in any direction, and with that came a sense of great responsibility.
I would be leading her into danger if I even dared to think about pursuing romance with this woman, and I knew that. The Dark Ones would not sleep until they'd ensured that her life was as miserable and, if they had their way, as abridged as they could make it.
I couldn't do that to her. And I couldn't do that to my kingdom.
I needed to be strong right now. And falling in love would make me weak. I couldn't allow that, both for her sake, and for the sake of my people.
I sighed, coming to my decision. And Melina, in tune with me on what must have been a fundamental level, seemed to intuit that something had just changed.
“Are you hungry?” she asked, trying to deflect what we both knew. “I can fix you breakfast, if you want me to. I don't know what dragonshifters eat, but...”
I smiled at this, in spite of myself. “Just regular people food,” I said, then shook my head. “But no. I'm sorry. I really appreciate all that you've done for me. But I'm afraid I might be putting you in danger simply by my being here. And anyway, my people need me. If you left behind three dead Dark Ones in the middle of the highway when you rescued me, plus a fire threatening to burn down the entire forest, there's no telling what the authorities have figured out, and whether they haven't already stumbled onto our hiding place.”
“It was on the news,” Melina said quickly. “Those um– Dark Ones must have had help nearby to clear away the bodies after I left. Because it said on the news that when police got there all they saw was the damage. The roads all broken up, the trees on fire, the bits of my car everywhere. The officers they interviewed seemed really confused by what th
ey were seeing, and no one knew what caused it.”
I sighed with relief at this. “Oh. Well, for once, I guess I'm grateful to the Dark Ones, then. It would have been a nightmare if they'd been discovered. And I'm afraid the war the Dark Ones wanted would only have been accelerated by their discovery...”
“There was one guy they interviewed, just some local nutjob, who swore on his life that it was aliens, that he saw a UFO disappear into the stars right after the fire started.”
I laughed. “The funny thing is, he probably guessed the closest when you think about it. I'm glad people like that exist, coming up with the wildest explanations for everything they can think of. So any time someone actually does happen to catch a glimpse of us, everyone just thinks they're crazy for saying so. It's very convenient at times.”
Melina tried to smile, but I could tell she was still trying to think of some pretense to keep me from leaving, and the realization that she might not find one was starting to make her feel hopeless.
“Are you sure you don't want to stay just a little bit longer? At least until you're sure you're well enough to go back out? You got beat up pretty bad last night...”
I smiled wanly, and shook my head. “No. I'm okay. You've already done enough for me. And I am deeply grateful to you for that. Thank you. But now I must return to my home, and see that my house is in order.”
Melina's disappointment was palpable, her eyes cast down to her feet, but she nodded all the same. “I understand. And... Don't worry, about me telling anyone. I wouldn't do that. I just hope everything works out for you. With those Dark Ones, I mean. And I'm sorry. About your experiences with humans.”
“Don't be sorry,” I pleaded “You're a human, and you're one of the kindest individuals I've ever met. I wouldn't still be here if it wasn't for you. You have my eternal gratitude for that. And who knows? If the two of us can get along, maybe there's still some hope for our people yet.”
This statement hung in the air for a moment. It felt significant, and I had to wonder whether I might be making the wrong decision by leaving this woman behind after all. Maybe, if my feelings were true, the best thing for human-dragon relations would be to take them seriously, and to prove to my people that our species could live in harmony, as we had once done so many years ago.
But then, as quickly as the thought arose, the moment passed, and I decided that it was well past time for me to take my leave.
Soon I'd exited Melina's apartment, and she stood watching me from her open front door. I paced slowly down the steps, and stopped in front of her car. In the daylight, it was plain to see how horribly beaten up it was from the events of the previous evening. It looked like it belonged in a junkyard– or, perhaps, as though it had been salvaged from one.
I thought for a moment, then turned back to her, thinking I might offer to pay her in gold for the damages that had been inflicted to her property, largely because of me. But when I saw her, she waved at me from her landing, sadly twinkling her fingers at me. And at that moment, I felt sure that if I spoke a single word further to her, in any context, I would be helpless but to give voices to the powerful emotions that had developed between the two of us, over such a short span of time.
And I just couldn't do that.
I simply waved at her, grinning unenthusiastically. Then I turned, and forced myself not to look back again, knowing that if I did it would be the point of no return for both of us.
We lived in the real world, I kept reminding myself. The heart wanted what it wanted, but sometimes what it wanted simply couldn't be. If it could, I never would have lost Andra. My kingdom, my children, and my people would not be under the constant threat of war with the Dark Ones.
And I would not be forced to leave this caring, remarkable woman behind...
____
I did the best that I could to put the entire incident behind me.
I returned home, and was met by a feverish embrace from my sons upon my return to the castle. Needless to say, they'd all been terrified of what might have happened to me the previous evening, and I had to keep reassuring them that I would never leave them. That I loved them far too much for that, and that I would always come back to them no matter what.
I would have liked to spend the entire remainder of the day with the three of them– doing so, I thought, would have eased some of the frustration I felt about Melina, and about all of this.
Quickly enough, however, I was reminded that I was a king first, and a father second, at least in the eyes of my constituents. In no time at all I was whisked away from my boys and taken to confront the Dark Ones who'd been captured over the course of the previous evening. Several of them had remained tight-lipped until now. But between the cooperation of the more pliable among them, the wearing effects of their hours in the castle dungeon, and the influence of my presence on their willingness to talk, we ended up getting some far more promising information out of them than we might have hoped for at first.
We were correct in assuming that Ryl himself had not been present at the rally the night before. He was lying we low, as we suspected, not wishing to take any unnecessary risks at the moment he could avoid doing so. What we'd seen, on the contrary, had been more of a morale booster for the Dark Ones, who were growing impatient to act, as well as a sort of recruitment ceremony, undertaken in the hopes of swaying anyone they could find into joining their ranks.
I acted on all of this information as best I could, hoping that there was still time for me to get a lid on the situation before things became any more out of control than they already were.
The trick was, how did I enact laws that prevented the persecution of humans and allegiance with the Dark Ones, without becoming so strict that I drove any Protectors on the fence into the arms of Ryl and his men?
It started with the Dark Ones we'd captured meeting together the night before, and the matter of what fate should befall them for their act of gathering to overthrow me– an act that, essentially, amounted to treason.
Many of my closest advisors suggested that these men should be executed, to serve as an example to others. And this certainly had its appeal at first, whenever I thought of Melina, and how the comrades of these men had tried so fervently to end her life as well as mine.
I had never liked the use of execution as a punishment, however. I saw it as barbaric, a remnant of a bygone era, and it had been years since I'd made use of it against anyone. Even if it weren't for these reservations, I nevertheless held a far more sober view of the effectiveness of such methods than my men seemed to.
More than anything, I worried that my ruthlessness in dealing with these traitors, however deserved it may have been, would only serve as a tool for propaganda on the Dark Ones' behalf, and in the end it might end up strengthening their numbers, rather than diminishing them.
I decided, in the end, to retain the men as prisoners indefinitely, possibly for life, but allowing them the chance to redeem themselves in time, and releasing them, if and only if, they could prove to me that they had truly changed their ways.
In the meantime, and over the course of the next several weeks, my men and I acted on the intelligence they'd given us. We sent a party of spies out to search for Ryl and his closest allies, certain that there were only so many places the highest ranking Dark Ones could be hiding away. They simply couldn't evade us forever.
Closer to home, we began raiding event after event, gathering after gathering, preventing the congregation of anti-human zealots whenever we possibly could, hoping, that by doing so, we might be able to halt the movement in its tracks.
I still had to be careful. I knew that my vigilance needed to have its limits– I couldn't go all inquisitorial squad throughout the Kingdom, accusing everyone for displaying even a shadow of sympathy for the Dark Ones and their ideas. They were, at the end of the day, just ideas after all. And dangerous ideas though they were, I needed to walk a thin line of discouraging allegiance to the Dark Ones, while not appearing to unjustly
persecute them in the eyes of those on the fence about where they loyalties lay.
None of these tasks was easy or straightforward, and as the weeks passed I had to keep reminding myself of the greater good, and what all of this was for, even as the clashes became more violent, and tensions mounted further and further, rapidly nearing their breaking point.
And of course, Melina was never too far from my mind.
I couldn't simply forget about her, sweep away her memory as though it was some insignificant thing to me.
I'd told myself, originally, that love would make me weak in my fight against Ryl and the Dark Ones. Now, however, I wondered whether the opposite might be true.
Now, I found myself longing for someone to depend on in these trying times. Someone, moreover, who might depend on me. And as I had once rhapsodized, Melina was the very proof I had always imagined that humans and shifters could exist cooperatively. She was nothing if not a constant reminder of why I could not let Ryl and his hatred be victorious.
In my mind, Melina became so much more than an ideal– but instead, the very proof of that ideal.
What was it about her?
I knew so little about the woman, and yet she had so completely captivated me.
I knew that she was kind, and compassionate, and a caring, gentle soul. And maybe that was enough.
She was also the most beautiful woman I'd ever laid eyes on, or at least since Andra, and that didn't hurt matters much, either...
I knew I was only torturing myself. I knew that what I found myself longing for, more than anything in the world, couldn't possibly be a reality.
But if that was the case, why the hell couldn't I talk myself out of these insane notions?
I don't know how long it was after the events of that night. Several weeks, at least. But gradually, incidents of Dark One conspiracy seemed to trickle to a halt, their meetings dwindling, happening less and less often, with my men reporting fewer and fewer incidents, and a sort of very fragile tension gradually beginning to set upon the kingdom.
