WE FINISH LUNCH AND I decide to head back to The Tower to get ready to go for a run. I realize today will be the first time I go for a run with Bo by myself and I’m excited to see what he can do. I finally meet Jax’s housekeeper, Sofia. I change so fast, even I can’t believe it. I head out the door. I inform my detail of the route I want to take and get approval from them. We enter the park, and after a quick stretch, I take off; it feels wonderful. Running gives me the time to organize my thoughts. Bo seems to love it too.
As I acclimate to the pace I’d like to stay at, I think about Jax’s housekeeper. I honestly can’t believe this man has a housekeeper that looks like a cross between a Playboy Bunny and a Hooters waitress. No wonder he didn’t tell me. He can’t be so dense to think that I wouldn’t be upset, especially since I’m going to look like a fucking cow soon. I need to figure out what I’m going to do.
I love Jax—heart and soul. I know that he loves me, but now there is a baby involved. I need to have stability, and so does my baby. I need to see my mother. However, I also need to consider her safety. I don’t even know if she will know who I am. I could never forget her; her beautiful blonde hair and crystal-blue eyes.
It’s amazing when you run through Central Park with two bodyguards and a big dog, no one comes near you. When we get to the end of the run, I head over to the vendor for a warm pretzel and water. I decide to sit on a bench and enjoy the sunshine. One of my fondest memories is of Marco and me, sitting on a park bench and people watching. We would make up stories about some of the people; Marco’s were always funny. I still can’t believe he is dead, and how little I really knew about him. Before I know it, the tears are flowing. I’m such a jumble of emotions. Bella said it wouldn’t get better, so just deal with it and know that for the rest of the pregnancy, I will basically be bat shit crazy.
I get up to go across the street, and Bo stops. His hair is on end as he lets out a growl that freezes me to my spot. My guards are around me in an instant. I don’t see any threats, only a very beautiful lady with long, black hair and dark glasses. She is watching me and it’s making my hair stand on end. She takes a step forward. Bo crouches down, baring all his teeth! My guards lift me up and run me out of the park. Bo is walking backwards and growling, watching her every move.
We run into The Tower, and when I get upstairs, I head right to Max’s place. I need to tell him what happened. He gives me his full attention as I relay the story. He gives the guards a quick nodding jerk of his head. They return it with a curt one and head out of the room. My guess is that was some sort of coded way to tell them to dig for answers.
“Raven, are you okay?” He brings his focus back to me.
As I calm my racing heart, I realize no matter how broken he is, we all rely on him so much . . . whom does he get to rely on? “Max, I was just rattled, you know Bo never did anything like that before. Who do you think that was?”
“Well, if I had to guess, I would say she is your father’s sister, Annabelle. One of your guards took a picture with his phone and sent it to Tony. Hopefully, he’ll have an answer soon. I know you think we are being hard on you with security, but do you see how danger can pop up anywhere?”
“Can this woman be as dangerous as Vincent?”
“Raven, even though women are generally not regarded as dangerous within the structure of a traditional organized crime family, Vincent structures his differently. He’s an animal; the lowest of the low.”
I walk over to the bar, and grab a bottle of water to help settle my nerves. “Max, what do you know about the structure of Vincent’s organization? Does he have a wife or children?”
“Surprisingly, no. He relies heavily on Annabelle and his consigliere, Mr. Deveno.”
I take his hand and squeeze it tightly. “Max, I understand about the security, but how am I supposed to live a normal life?”
He grimaces. “How do you think Jax would be able to live if something happened to you and the baby? Take it from me, he wouldn’t. It would destroy him.”
I’m not sure if he is talking about me anymore. “I get it, Max, and I’m sorry to unload this on you, especially with all the crap you are going through.”
I reach in and hug him, I whisper “Thank you.” As I leave, I turn and look back at him. He’s facing the window, his shoulders slumped. My heart is breaking for this man.
I GO NEXT DOOR and find the place empty. I decide upon a long, hot shower. I set everything up, lighting lots of candles, and I put on Jax’s IPod. I really can’t imagine life without this shower. I sense him before I see him; I know when he enters the room. My body starts buzzing, and the closer he gets, the louder the ringing in my ears is. I turn around and I’m hit with those beautiful eyes. I pull him close to me, reaching up and running my finger over his soft lips. I need to be in control. He is always so dominate, but he knows when I need to feel in control, and has no problem giving it to me.
“I need you, Jax. I need to wash away the day. I just need you and me.”
He leans in, slowly kissing me. “I’m here for you, baby, always.” He runs his hands down the back of my thighs and lifts me up. I wrap myself around his rock hard chest. He just holds me so tightly.
“Tonight, baby, I’m your pleasure god, everything I do will be for your pleasure. Do you trust me?”
I don’t even have to think twice, “Yes.” And with that, he carries me into the shower. He starts massaging my back very slowly, and then, he balances me on one of his knees while he washes my hair. All of the tension I felt before flows out of me.
“I love your hair; it’s so silky. When you drape it over my cock it’s just—wow!” he breathes. He lets me down gently so we can take turns washing each other.
We get out of the shower; he wraps me in warm towels, and then starts to dry my hair. I study him by candlelight. When he is doing something, he is so focused and intense, unlike me. I hope the baby takes after him; he’s so beautiful. He carries me into the bedroom, and I notice he has lit candles all around the room. He places me in the center of the bed.
“You are all mine, now and for always, my beautiful girl. I want to try something different with you. I’m not sure if you’re ready for it, though. You have to tell me no if you can’t, okay?”
My heart starts racing. “What do you want to do to me?”
He kisses me slowly, “I would like to blindfold you. I know from past experiences it might be too much to ask, so it has to be totally up to you.”
I stammer. “I w-will try.”
He strokes my back, calming me. “If it gets too much just tell me. I want you to experience pleasure without knowing what to expect; a total release.”
He takes me to such new highs all the time. “I trust you, Jax.”
He reaches over to the bedside table, and pulls out a blindfold made of silk. “Close your eyes.” As he ties the blindfold around me, my heart beats wildly. I don’t know if I can do this. I want to do this, to give him pleasure. More importantly, I need to do this for me. I will not let fear rule me; I rule fear. He kisses me long and slow, our tongues doing an erotic dance. “I want every part of you. I want to be your first and your last.”
He’s working his way down my neck, then back up to my ear, dragging his teeth as he goes. Just as I’m really getting into it, he stops. “Jax?”
“I’m still here, Raven, just getting some stuff.”
Stuff, what stuff? I take a deep breath, releasing it very slowly. I trust this man.
“Are you still okay?”
I nod.
“I need to hear the words, Raven. Are you still okay?”
I let out a deep breath, “Yes. Yes, Jax, I’m okay.”
He has the music on repeat; The Righteous Brothers singing “Unchained Melody.” I feel his lips on mine and they taste like . . . Nutella! “Hmm, wow. So warm and silky.” His tongue is full of Nutella, and he’s working it around mine. This is so erotic, I don’t want it to end. Now he’s massaging my neck, his tongue follows
wherever he’s massaging. I realize he’s massaging me with the warm, silky, chocolate hazelnut goodness. He works his way down my body until he’s between my legs. I gasp.
“You okay, Raven?”
Every nerve ending is on fire. “Yes. Please don’t stop, please. Oh my God, Jax.”
His arms are locked around my thighs, and he is not letting up. The sensations are stronger because I can’t see him. I’m pulling his hair and my hips are going wild. His grip on my thighs is strong like iron. “Are you really okay, baby, if not I’ll stop.”
I gasp, “Don’t you dare stop! Jax, I . . . oh, fuck . . . Jax—I’m coming!” My core is shaking, and there is a buzzing in my brain. My body is so flushed; he’s relentless. He works me down real slow as he kisses his way up my body.
“I’m not done, sweetheart, not by a long shot.”
He enters me very slowly, so I can feel every rock hard inch of him.
“Oh yeah . . . do you feel that? Perfect, just fucking perfect, sweetheart. You’re so beautiful. Enough of this blindfold, I need your eyes.” He pulls the blindfold off and I’m hit with that beautiful smile. He has me totally cocooned with his body. In and out, then around to the right, and back around to the left. His arms reach underneath me, and he grips my shoulders, pulling me down as his hips push up—he’s so fucking deep! Wow, this man has some killer moves.
“Look at me, Raven, now.”
My eyes open wide and lock violets to blues. The depths I can see into this man’s soul is . . .”Oh, fuck . . . oh, God . . . holy fuck, Jax!”
He slams into me, exploding with such force. He begins to slow down, giving me a chance to breathe. He rolls onto his side, taking me with him.
My brain fog begins to clear. “Jax, we should shower again, and clean up here.”
He shakes his head, “Nope.”
I look at him, “That’s it, just nope?”
“Sweetheart, I could care less about the mess.” He’s in the happy place right now, and that’s where I think he wants to stay. “Besides, I’m not done yet.”
How could he possibly? “You’re not done yet?”
As he laughs that beautiful raspy growl of a laugh, he tenderly kisses me, “With you, I know no end.” He’s moving slow and steady, in and out, but then he stops and pulls out of me. “I want to be in every part of you tonight.” He crawls up to my chest and wedges his cock between my breasts, pulling my nipples, and pumping his cock.
“Oh, God, Jax, my nipples are on fire!”
He throws his head back, screaming and coming all over my breasts. “Raven, I. Love. You.”
He leans down and kisses me real slowly. Working his way down my body, he enters me again.
“Jax, you can’t possibly go again?”
He laughs, “No, now it’s time for sleep.”
I kiss him. “Shouldn’t we shower?”
He shakes his head and gifts me with the most beautiful smile. “Nope, just like this—all night long.” He pulls the comforter over us, and holds me in his arms, all while he’s buried deep within me.
AS I SLOWLY OPEN my eyes, I realize Jax is still buried deep inside me. I laugh that this is the way this crazy, beautiful man loves to sleep. I have to wonder how he is going to manage that when I’m as large as a cow. We are stuck together and as I attempt to pull us apart, he tightens his grip.
“Where are you going?”
I never know when he’s sleeping or just in, “Jax zone.” “I was going to head to the bathroom, and then the shower. I thought you were asleep?”
There’s that smile. “I’ve been up for a while, waking up like this is shear heaven.”
“I don’t understand how you’re able to sleep like this.”
“Sweetheart, knowing that you’re safe, and locked onto me all night long is a beautiful fucking thing.”
“Why are you allowed to swear, and I’m not even allowed to think a swear word?”
He opens one eye, “Hush, the baby is sleeping.”
I open my mouth to speak, but only a squeak comes out. Is he serious? “I hope you know how absurd you sound.”
As I watch his face, I realize he’s serious. “I think it makes perfect sense. When Bella was pregnant, I made her listen to soothing classical music so Junior could relax. There are studies, showing that babies can hear stuff in the womb. Why do you think those Einstein CD’s are so popular?”
“Bella said you were nuts when she was pregnant, that you wanted health checks on everyone she came into contact with.”
He gives me that smirk then leans down and kisses me. God, only knows what else he did to poor Bella. “What else did my wonderful sister tell you?”
I can tell Jax doesn’t like to delve into the past, his body tenses quickly. “We didn’t go into it any further because your mom looked upset.”
He takes a deep breath. “It was a hard time for my mum when Bella found out she was pregnant. She wasn’t married to Michael, yet. My mum is a very traditional woman. She eventually came to terms with it, and no one could love Junior more. When he was kidnapped, and Joseph showed up at my office, she really tore into him. What else happened at lunch?”
“I spoke to them about Max. I’m worried about him and Jackie.” I watch his face, gaging his reaction.
He’s mindlessly stroking my arm. “Sweetheart, I understand you want everyone to have their own happily ever after, but that’s not always possible.”
I of all people know life is not all rainbows and flowers. “I know, but they are both so lost without each other. There has to be something I can do to help.”
As he begins stroking my back, he leans in and kisses my forehead. “Well, we are going to Switzerland tomorrow. I contacted Jackie’s parents and they are very excited that you will be coming. We are also going to see your mum and, if all works out, she will be coming back to the States with us.”
“Please tell me these are happy tears,” he pleads softly as I lose the battle with my tears.
I laugh, “They are. Just when I didn’t think I could love you more . . .”
He kisses me. “Enough talk, sweetheart, its time for the happy place.”
He tilts his hips, and kisses my lips. Just like that, everything else is forgotten.
AS I SIT ON the sofa, staring out over the New York skyline, I realize how much I miss her. I knew it would hurt, but it would hurt even more to keep her chained to me. Suddenly, there’s a commotion out in the hallway. I hear her before I can see her; the hair on my neck is standing on end. I knew she would be coming—it was only a matter of time.
“Maxwell, you tell these guards to let me in, otherwise you will be even more sorry than you are right now!”
I wave her in because to fight her would be fruitless. “Do you want a drink, ma’am?”
She sits next to me on the couch and pulls my ear. “Should you be drinking, Maxwell?”
“Probably not. I knew you would be coming by, so I figured you could yell at me for everything in one shot.”
Her face becomes red, and her jaw is tight. She’s really mad, and I hate that it’s me that made her this upset.
“Don’t get smart with me, Maxwell.”
We are silent for a bit. “I made my decision and I would like for you to respect that.”
She glares at me. “Not when it’s the wrong decision.”
I have to laugh, “No matter, it’s still my decision to make, right or wrong.”
She jumps up, “Are you afraid that history will repeat itself, Maxwell?”
I freeze, staring at her in shock. How could she possibly know? I’ve told no one. “How long have you known?”
“I knew your grandmother, and she told me everything—even why you went into Special Forces.”
I can’t believe she has known this whole time, never saying a word. “So you knew my grams before I even met Jax? Did you tell him? I mean, does he know the whole story? Is that why he tried to move heaven and earth to get me to work with him?”
; Her eyes fill with tears, and she’s losing the fight to hold them back. “No, of course not. It’s your story to tell, not mine. Maxwell, it was a random act of violence, and there was nothing you could have done to stop it. Denying yourself love . . . is just so wrong.”
“What if it happens again?” my voice cracks. “Look at what Jax is going through to keep Raven safe—all of you safe. I don’t think I could live through it again. Jackie deserves a carefree happy life. She will never have that if she is with me, we both know that. The longer she is with me, the bigger the target on her back gets.” I argue. She reaches down, taking my hand, and for the first time, I see such pain in her eyes. It breaks my heart, knowing that I’m the one causing it.
“Ma’am, some people are supposed to be alone.”
She shakes her head, “Never, Maxwell, never.”
“Either way, it’s my decision and I need you to respect that.”
“How about respecting Jackie. What you did to her was wrong. I understand your fear, but she didn’t deserve that.”
She squeezes my shoulder and heads out the door, leaving me to my thoughts.
BEFORE TOO LONG, Jax is back which is good. I need to be briefed on the trip. “Hey, sit down and run through your trip with me.”
He’s glaring at me. “Why are you drinking?”
I take a deep breath, “Calm down, Jax, it was just one scotch.”
He growls, “I don’t give a fuck! Are you trying to sabotage your recovery?”
“No, your mum was here earlier.”
“Oh, do I need one of those, too?”
I nod, “Yeah, I need to talk, and you need to listen.”
This is going to be so hard, but he needs to hear it all and it has to be from me. “Jax, there is a lot about me that you don’t know.”
“Max, whatever it is, it doesn’t matter, mate. It’s a little late in the game for this, don’t you think?”
He’s not going to make this easy. “Shut up and let me talk. This is very hard for me, and I never thought I would talk about it again, but then your mum came by and informed me that she already knew. Apparently, she was a friend of my grams long before we even met.” I swirl my scotch around before bringing it up to my lips for a little courage. He sits down, his attention fully focused on me. “I told you my mum died when I was young, and I went to live with my grams in London. I went to the University on a full scholarship. I graduated early, and then went to work for Scotland Yard. I was young . . . about twenty. It was hard work, but I was good at it, always having an eye for the little details. Before I knew it, I was moving up the ranks rather quickly. During this time, I met a beautiful girl, Samantha; a Barrister. That was how we met. We worked so well together, I caught them and she put them away. We were married and she became pregnant shortly after. I felt that I had put everything with my mum to rest. And I was becoming a man that my grams could respect and be proud of. My son was born on a beautiful spring day in May. We named him Elliot, after my grandfather; he was a beautiful, blond haired, blue-eyed boy. Everything was going just as I planned. Well, you know what they say about that.
Darkness into Dawn (The Unraveled Trilogy Book 2) Page 5
