by Jana LaPelle
The room is utterly silent. Even the musicians have stopped. “Am I wrong?” I look around the room to see that everyone is pondering my question before it erupts into conversation. I look to Alaric and Dagda and ask again, “Am I wrong? It just feels wrong to write him off, before we even try.” I say.
"Ash, Tarron will need to want to be redeemed," Alaric says.
"So, we give him that chance. If all else fails, we fall back to plan B." I look around the group hopefully.
Danu comes to my rescue, “She’s right. I would never have entered into a contract with Tarron if he was totally dark. But Ashlinn, please don’t get your hopes up, okay? Baby girl, he has much to overcome.”
"I know Mother, but I have to try," I say, overlooking her term of endearment. Not sure how I feel about it yet. "I'm not saying that the choices he's made are to be overlooked. He's an adult, after all. He chose to turn his back on the best support system that he had as his feelings of shame overshadowed his relationships with you both. May I ask his actual age? Dagda you said that his growth was accelerated. It could be that it took him some additional time to process his emotions as an adult even though he may have looked and acted like an adult. Is it possible that by the time he caught up, emotionally he had pushed you all away and had no one to turn to?"
Dagda and Alaric are mulling over what I have asked when Dagda says. "It's possible. Tarron was a full ten years behind Alaric when they met, yet he looked and acted like a boy of ten or eleven. Within the next year, he had fully caught up to Alaric, and the two never looked back. There were times that his actions were a little childish but not overtly so. He always sought to please and strived to receive positive reinforcement. Huh… Lass, you could be on to something. That being said, it's well past time that boy became an adult. He has chosen his road."
I contemplate his words, and before I can think about it I blurt out, "How would your creator approach Tarron? Would he write him off or would he seek to save him from himself? How would he advise you?"
He looks at me and then shifts his gaze to my mother. "Danu, sister, she is the one. I concede. I knew she was special but not until this moment did I realize that she is indeed the one." Confused I look at both my mother and Dagda as he turns his gaze to me, "Forgive me Ashlinn, I'm a stubborn old fool, it wasn't until this very moment that I acknowledge that you are indeed the one the prophecy spoke of. I'm so very sorry that this task falls to you, and I pledge my support to you. I would have supported you and Alaric regardless, but now I see. To answer your question, my Creator would never give up on a single soul. I believe that to this day he still holds out hope for Lucifer. This is complicated Ashlinn. You will be walking into an unknown setting with no allies. He means to keep you by any means necessary. Even if you can convince him to fight on the right side of the battles to come, he will never concede to Alaric over you."
Dagda's words ring of truth and I begin to fidget in my seat as I allow the reality of what I will be walking into settle into the recesses of my mind, trying to figure out what I'm going to do. Next to me, Alaric says, "Mo grá, I love that you want to save Tarron from himself, but I would rather not have to put you in that position. Let's work on a plan A, and a plan B. Okay?"
"I agree with Alaric, lass. We need to keep you safe with your Guard if at all possible. So plan A will be to do whatever we can to dissolve the contract, and that will be put into play tomorrow. Alexia, Nemus, and the elder druids should begin their research. Danu, if we could contact the person responsible for casting the contract that would be a plus. Plan B will be to strengthen your bonds to everyone here and give you as much knowledge, and weapons training as possible so when and if the time comes that you are forced to go to Tarron, then you will be as prepared as you can be. We will also be working on a Plan C, which will be to rescue you and get you back if it comes down to that." The room is silent as Dagda concludes. The fire in its large open grate is beginning to die down, but the storm outside has yet to subside as thunder rumbles through the walls of the Keep and I decide to share with everyone here my new gift.
I look at the love of my life and smile sadly before addressing the group as a whole, "We're going to have to place a lot of effort into plans B and C." That gets everyone going as I stand to quiet everyone while reaching back for Alaric's hand before I continue, "Before Tarron even made it through the gate this evening I was very agitated and worried. That feeling only increased as Mother and the Druids completed the ritual this evening. Then as it was announced that a courier was arriving, I began having these images flash through my mind. I saw what was going to play out before it did this evening. My very last premonition was of me trying to resist the pull of the blood contract after Tarron had evoked it to life. In my vision the more I fought it, the harder it became to breathe until finally, I could not breathe at all. I realized that I would die if I did not succumb. So I did. As I let go of my resistance, I could see dark ribbons of majic reaching for me, wrapping around me, pulling me to Tarron." I swallow hard reliving that dreadful feeling of not being in control of my own body, of not being able to resist that dark pull. I feel Alaric's emotions bouncing from anger to helplessness and back again through our bond, and I turn into his embrace as I mutter, "I was alone in my vision." I close my eyes as I allow his touch to calm me. I hear everyone begin to talk quietly. I tune them out, and instead, I tune into the soft ballad being played in the background. I want nothing more than to sway to the music with my kindred. So I pull him with me, and we make our way to a more open area in the room close to the terrace doors. He gathers me up as we begin to move to the sound of the music. It calms my frayed nerves, and we intertwine our hands with our binding markings. The tingles that spark to life are reassuring as I rest my head on his solid chest and watch as our markings begin to glow. The sparkle can be seen in the dim lighting of the room. I smile up at Alaric as hope blooms in my chest.
Chapter 34
(Ashlinn)
The next several days pass in a blur as Lexie, and I and everyone else fall into a daily routine. Every morning we get up and go to breakfast where Alaric, Rhespen, and I consume massive quantities of food to everyone's amazement. Bets are placed daily to see if I will out eat any of the other men. I'm no longer embarrassed and good-naturedly join in the fun. Then we head to weapons training where Lorcan and Ēolieus work with Lexie and me. Their approach is different from Tolin and Torin's direct brute force approach. Their movements are more fluid with more finesse. They're patient but strict, and daily we find that we are not picking ourselves up off the ground as much as when we first began. Each day we continue to hone our skills, and it feels good to know that I'm getting better and learning new techniques. I find that I love using the throwing knives, but I'm still not picking up on the swordplay, it's more difficult to perform well. I need to continue to strengthen my upper body, so that has led to strength conditioning as part of our daily routine. To say that I truly despise chin ups and pushups is an understatement, but the results don't lie, so I will continue the grueling morning routine. Then we break for lunch and afterward head to the library for our studies. There is so much to learn about Faerie. There are the histories as well as all the different races, majic, and the list goes on and time is short. Next, we break for the evening meal and then Lexie goes to work with her Druids on mastering and understanding casting and spells and elemental majic. I go to work with Danu and Dagda on opening up my abilities. I find that I'm my biggest obstacle as I continue to doubt myself. Just as soon as I begin to make progress, I slide back again. By the fifth night, I'm pissed.
"Why the hell can't I get this?" I stomp my feet in frustration. "What you have shown me is so simple. It's so freakin elementary, a toddler could do this. So why can't I?! Aaaahhh... Damn it!" I'm fuming as once again I cannot conjure fire. Something as easy as lighting a freakin candle, it looks simple, it is simple, but I have yet to be able to conjure more than a turbulent wind. As I focus on how
much time I don't have, I give into my emotions. As I do so, my frustration continues to build, and I begin to feel a prickling sensation along my hands and arms. I look down to see that my hands and arms are engulfed in flames. Just like when my Mother was angry in our chambers after finding that Alaric and I had completed the binding. The flames course up and down my limbs in orangey red and blue flames that continue to creep up my arms. As the fire spreads above my elbows, I begin to panic and fling them around erratically. Evidently, my current predicament is funny as Dagda erupts into a full belly laugh that would remind me of Santa if the circumstances were not so dire. I look to my mother and scream, "What do I do?"
My mother looks at me and replies calmly, "It's simple. Focus on the fire and ask it to do your bidding. It's that simple. You conjured the fire. It's yours to command." She says serenely.
All the while Dagda is all but rolling on the ground as I struggle to control the flames that threaten to overcome me. I'm now fully engulfed as I stand there struggling to understand what to do and then it clicks. I calm my mind as I allow myself to connect to the fire element. I breathe in deeply and direct the flames to leave me and hover above us. I watch as two orbs of flames drift above us on our training field and in a moment of childish abandonment I ask the fire to rain down on us like a burst of fireworks and extinguish as I twirl around the outside circle laughing. Just because I can, I conjure a fireball and hurtle it towards Dagda who is still taking great pleasure in my struggle to learn this new talent. Laughing, he quickly douses my attempt to take him off guard with a burst of gale-force winds.
"My dear lass, you and your mother are so much alike it's rather funny. The key is your emotions. You are level headed yet there are times when you let your emotions rule you. I suspect anger, rage, and frustration will often times call the fire element. The water and air elements are more serene and calming. The earth element is difficult for us all, but I believe that you are tied to that element through your shifter side." Dagda decrees. "Although I'm more inclined to think that the air element may be your affinity element. Soon we will begin working on your control over the wind. That element will come in handing in battle."
My mother walks up to me and pulls me into a hug. I allow it since we're really trying to forge a relationship. Yes, she's overbearing and likes to be in control. She doesn't mind speaking her peace, but she really is trying. I have come to dislike the looks I see on her face when she doesn't know that I'm watching her watching me. She looks so very sad. There is a wistful look of longing that I can no longer bear, so I hug her back. She says lightly in my ear, "Your father and I could not be more proud of you. I don't care if you master the elements or not. I love you, baby girl. We'll be here for you always." She says, hugging me back.
I pull back to see Dagda walking back to the Keep signaling an end to our session this evening and reply to my mother, "I know that I'll have your support, and that means the world to me. But you know we're no closer to unraveling the blood contract than when we first found out about it. My premonition will come to pass and when that happens how will you be able to be there for me?" I know I sound like a child, but I honestly can't help it as the worry I feel continues to eat away at me.
"Ashlinn, have you learned nothing since the first morning in the library when we all met for the first time? All you have to do is call upon me, and I'll appear before you. Tarron will not be able to keep me out. I am the High Queen of the Realm as well as a goddess, but most importantly I'm your mother." She says.
I consider her words for a moment before replying, “I don’t think it will be that easy, Mother. I have a feeling that the dark prince has a plan for me that does not include me reconnecting with my family once he has me. I think that he will seek to isolate me from you all until I accept my fate, a fate that he now believes to be one that includes him and only him.” I pause and allow her to think about what I’ve said and then seek to change the subject. “So how are you and Father getting along?”
Danu swings her head in my direction, eyes wide. “Why do you ask?”
"Well, the two of you were looking rather cozy sitting there on the couch the other night while the rest of us were listening to Dagda recount Tarron's history. Don't think I didn't catch the possessive hold he had on you and then there was the almost kiss to your cheek. Not to mention how he kept glancing at you. The sexual tension between the two of you could have sat the room on fire." I say in a teasing tone.
“Ashlinn Ryllae.” She says in a mock scolding manner.
"Mother it's not like I don't know what all those heated looks mean. For heaven's sake, I'm getting some Elf-Man action every night." I say laughing as her jaw drops at my words.
"Ashlinn, I do believe that you have been hanging around with Lady Jasmine way too much." She says in an indignant tone. Then she looks around as if to see if anyone can hear our conversation before continuing. She takes my hand, and we begin to walk toward the lake's edge as twilight begins to set in upon us. She leans into me conspiratorially and says, "Your father and I are most definitely back together. Truth be told, he's the only male that I have ever really loved. I didn't see how we could possibly have a future together after what I had done. Don't get me wrong, he was extremely irate with me, and it took my pleading for his forgiveness, but once he calmed down, he did eventually forgive me and with his forgiveness we both recognized the pull to one another that we've always had. That night in the library, that was our first night back together as a couple." She pauses before continuing as if to gauge my response, "I never should have left him. I know that now. I want you to know that we're planning a binding ceremony before the blood contract goes into effect. How do you feel about that, daughter?"
I think carefully about my next words, "Mother, all I want is for you and Father to be happy and if being together makes you happy then, by all means, proceed with this binding. I just don't want either of you to rush into anything because of what is about to happen with me. There will be time for you two to reconnect." I pause, "I know not everything is about me, and I don't mean it to sound as if it is. Well, snap, I suck at this. All you need to know is that I'm happy for you both. You look really good together as a couple."
Danu slows her pace and pulls me to a stop as she smiles at me, “Ashlinn, he makes me happy, so very happy. It very nearly killed me to walk away from him, thinking that he would never forgive me for what I was about to do. Knowing he would never condone it. Then when I realized that day in your quarters that Rhespen was indeed your father, my heart wanted to sing, but my head kept telling me that he would never forgive me. Once we had time to talk in private, and he had calmed down. He allowed me the time I needed to explain myself. Finally, he did forgive me, and as he did so, a weight that I've been carrying around in my chest was lifted. For the first time in a while, I've been able to breathe, really breathe. I've never stopped loving him, and I want nothing more than to bind to him and him with me. So in answer to your question we're doing this for us. By us, I mean all of us. Rhespen and I have talked, and we want to be a family, maybe a rather unconventional one, but a family none the less. We want you to know that we love you and will stand as a united front with you, for you. We want to make it up to you for not being there when you were little." I take in her words and look at the goddess in front of me. I have never seen my Mother look more beautiful.
“Then I’m beyond thrilled that you two are finally going to get your happily ever after. When is the ceremony to be held? Will Alaric and I be able to attend? I’ll have to have another dress. You’ll have to have a dress.” I gush on in excitement. “It was just Mom and me when I was little. I used to daydream about being a part of a big family. So how many brothers and sisters can I expect?” I’m practically bouncing as we come around the corner and run into my Father. He’s grinning from ear to ear as he leans down to kiss my forehead before turning all his attention on his chosen mate.
“So, I see, yo
u shared our good news? What do you think love? We already know that we make beautiful babies together.” He says with a twinkle in his eye.
“Rhespen! Please.” She sputters with a smile.
Clearing my throat, I say, "On that note, I think I'll go see if I can find Alaric. Mother, Father Congratulations.
I'm so happy for you both. It's my hope that one day we can bring our children up together, to be raised more like brother and sister rather than aunts and uncles and nieces and nephews. It worked out rather well for Lexie and me." I smile at the thought as my father considers my words before saying, "You may be on to something but seeing as I've just found out about you I would rather that you not aspire to give me grandchildren just yet."
“Whoa, there pops. I have no plans on birthing you grandchildren any time soon. There’s way too much at stake. An innocent babe would complicate things for Alaric and me. You guys, on the other hand, do not suffer from such restraints. Just sayin’…” I say with a smirk.
Rhespen concedes with a knowing glint in his eyes. It's then that everything around me falls away as I see images flashing before my eyes. Images that give me hope for the future, images that show Alaric and me holding our children, laughing with Declan and Lexie, and Danu and Rhespen. We're picnicking by the lake and Danu, Lexie, and I are all holding babes that are slightly different ages and the guys are chasing toddlers and children of varying ages. It's a happy occasion as Alaric swings our daughter up in the air making her giggle. As the vision comes to an end, I'm smiling as tears are welling up in my eyes.
