by Lisa Gardner
And then he smiled.
Perfect.
TWENTY-NINE
Saturday, May 19, 6:01 A.M.
Sandy O’Grady wasn’t asleep when the phone rang. She was lying on her back in bed, staring at the gray shadows shifting on her ceiling. She’d been dreaming that she was a little girl again. She’d been out in fields, lounging back in the thick grass with her best friend, Melinda. They were identifying the shapes of clouds.
“Look, that one’s a dragon.”
“Oh, oh, an elephant!”
“A two-headed dog!”
Sandy had woken up with tears on her cheeks and the nearly unbearable need to call Melinda. Except she knew that wasn’t really it. Melinda had moved to Portland nearly fifteen years ago. She’d gotten married—Sandy had attended the ceremony seven months pregnant with Danny—and she and Sandy hadn’t spoken since. Their lives had moved on, the way lives did. They both had new friends who lived closer, had more in common, and required less effort to keep in touch.
She didn’t honestly miss her childhood friend that much. She supposed, however, that she missed her childhood.
To be young and carefree. To be so sure that you had all the answers.
Snoring came from the living room, where Shep slept on the sofa. Rustling came from the front-hall closet, where Becky slept on the floor. And silence came from the bedroom where Danny used to be.
Six A.M. Staring at the ceiling. Wondering where her life had gone wrong. Wondering how to make sense of things. She was a mother now, and it was her job to know the way.
The phone rang.
Sandy picked it up before it completed the first high-pitched peal.
She said, “Hello, Danny.”
He didn’t reply. She heard the now-familiar background noises. Clanging metal, distant hum of voices. Sandy had seen some of Cabot County’s facility the first time she’d tried to visit Danny. New, modern, really not so bad compared to how some youth detention halls could be. In Sandy’s imagination, however, the youth center remained a grim, gray prison, and these noises fit that place.
“How are you doing, Danny?” she asked, keeping her voice light. She shifted to get more comfortable on the bed. She had him on the phone. She might as well keep him, for it seemed this would be as close to contact as she would get with her son.
“We’re doing okay,” she said conversationally. “We miss you. Your father is working very hard to help you. We hired a lawyer, Avery Johnson. I know you’ve met him. He’s very good, the best of the best. Your father and I are pleased he took your case.”
Still nothing.
She took another deep breath. “Becky is starting to come around. She got a new stuffed animal yesterday. A white and gray kitten. You know how much she likes cats. In fact, we might get a real cat soon. Would you like that? Your father is thinking maybe he could handle a pet after all, and Becky has sworn up and down she’ll take care of everything. He’ll never have to know it’s around. Of course, now we need to go to the pound to pick out a kitten, and I’m not sure how Becky will handle that. She’ll take one look and want to bring home every animal in the place. We could end up with a zoo. Can you imagine your father knee-deep in puppies and kittens?”
Silence.
Sandy’s eyes began to burn. She blinked the tears away. “I wish I could see you, Danny,” she said. “I miss you. Very much. I’ll be honest. I’ve—I’ve been better. But there are a lot of folks around here who believe in you. The church has started a fund-raiser to help with the legal bills. Your grandma and grandpa, they’ve been by every day to help out, and they keep saying how much they can’t wait to get this whole misunderstanding behind us. The neighbors have brought over food. Why, yesterday we even got a brand-new set of Bibles!
“Danny?”
Still no answer.
She sighed quietly. “I miss you. I wish I could give you a big hug right now. I wish I could kiss the top of your head. I wish …” Her voice had grown thick. “I wish I could make everything all right. Because I know whatever happened, you didn’t do it on purpose. You’re a good boy, Danny. You’re my boy, and I love you very much.”
More silence. Sandy couldn’t take any more of this; her son was breaking her heart. She went to hang up, and Danny finally spoke.
He said dully, “So much noise. And this horrible smell. Not like the movies. I pulled the trigger. So much noise.”
“Danny?”
“They jerked. The lockers went pop. People fell down. So much noise. I did such a bad thing, Mommy.” His voice rose abruptly. “I did such a bad thing!”
Sandy’s chest tightened. She had suspected this was coming, and still, hearing the long-feared words out loud nearly ripped her in two. She whispered helplessly, “I’m sorry, honey. I am so sorry it came to this.”
“The noise. So much noise …”
“Danny—”
“He’s going to kill me.”
“Who, Danny? We want to help you—”
“I want to die, Mommy. I wish I could lay down my head and just … die.”
“Don’t talk like that! You’re young, you made a mistake. It’s this other person’s fault. He tricked you, Danny. Can’t you see that? He manipulated you. Now tell us who it is. Please, Danny.”
But Danny had pulled himself back together. She could hear his ragged breathing quiet, then a long snuffle as he wiped his nose with the back of his hand.
“I can’t,” he said at last, and his voice sounded surprisingly mature, surprisingly resolved. “I can’t tell you anything, Mommy. I’m too damn smart.”
THIRTY
Saturday, May 19, 6:35 A.M.
Quincy was already up and moving when the old rotary phone shrieked to life next to his bed. At first he was startled by the sound, then he was confused. No one called him here. The office used his cell phone, and the locals—namely, Rainie—seemed to prefer to simply show up. Then a new thought struck Quincy. He froze at the bathroom sink, one half of his face still lathered, the other half shaved.
The phone squawked again.
Funny, but he couldn’t get his feet to move.
He’d been so sure that when the call came it would be on his cell phone. God knows he lived and breathed through its digital lifelines. But he’d also given the office the hotel number, and if Bethie had asked some hospital assistant to please track him down …
The phone kept ringing. He forced himself to get moving.
Thirty seconds later it was over and done. And it was as horrible as he feared and as simple as he’d expected. If he would just come to the hospital. They would unplug the machines, pull the ventilating tubes. It could be over very quickly or very slowly. You just never knew.
He started packing his bags. When white foam splashed his carry-on, he realized he hadn’t finished shaving and returned to the sink.
He had phone calls to make. The first few, to Quantico, were easy. The last one, to Rainie, he realized he didn’t know how to do. His expertise was in the professional world. When it came to his personal life, he still had a lot to learn.
The case here needed him. Things were moving fast now, and with a sophisticated killer things generally got worse before they got better. He found himself thinking of Jim Beckett and another young, beautiful law-enforcement officer whose attempt at stopping the serial killer hadn’t even broken his stride. Oh God, he hoped it didn’t come down to that here.
Rainie needed him. She was resilient, but she was going through things no one should go through alone. Last night, right before she turned on him again, he’d seen the ache in her eyes. One more moment, one last defense, and she’d be ready to open up completely. He wanted to be there for that moment. They had the start of something rare and special, he thought. God knows, he did not meet enough people in his life who both challenged and captivated him.
Except his family needed him, too, and as happened so often in his life, he couldn’t be in two places at once. He was not Superagent or Superfather. He was
just a person leading a complicated life, and sometimes he did fail the people he loved.
Rainie was tougher than Bethie, he thought. And she was trained in the field. Weak comforts, but he would take what he could get.
He picked up the phone and dialed. Rainie answered on the fifth ring, just when he was beginning to give up. Her voice sounded distant and not at all like her.
“Rainie? I’m sorry, did I wake you?”
She mumbled something that might have been yes.
He waited, and when she didn’t offer anything more, he kept the conversation simple, for there was no way to make it kind. “Rainie, I have to return to Virginia now.”
Stunned silence. He’d expected as much.
He continued with more calmness than he felt. “The hospital just called me. Apparently, Bethie has agreed to shut off life support. She’s already signed the forms to donate Mandy’s organs, and there are people who are waiting.… It’s … it’s time.”
Rainie didn’t say anything.
“I’ll come back,” he said quickly. “I had the sabot couriered to the crime lab yesterday and pulled a few strings to make it a priority project. I can apply even more pressure while I’m local.”
She remained silent.
“And I’d like to do some additional research while I’m back there,” he added briskly. “I was thinking about it early this morning. I’m willing to bet the person we are looking for is what we call an authority-complex killer. The most famous example is Charles Manson, of course.”
He thought he might be babbling. She still wasn’t talking and he couldn’t seem to stop.
“An authority-complex killer generally comes from a family with an extremely domineering parental figure,” he heard himself say. “This parent either physically or verbally abuses him as a child. The child grows up fantasizing about facing down his parent but never has the ability to do so. Instead, his rage becomes focused on other people in power. Except rather than seek out direct violence against them, the killer manipulates others into acting. This, of course, makes him feel powerful and omnipotent.
“I need to look up additional case studies, but authority-complex killers are generally charismatic, verbal, and possess excellent socialization skills. The interesting thing about them is that they are mental. Even more than violence, they enjoy toying with people in charge, creating elaborate ruses such as we’ve seen. This person doesn’t want things quick or easy. He wants to watch the police sweat and gloat over our seeming stupidity. In other words, the more I think about it, the more I’m sure Dave Duncan is still in the area.”
“There’s a chance he’s still in the area,” Rainie intoned dully.
“But don’t underestimate him,” Quincy added hastily. “He’ll kill directly if he has to. Particularly established authority figures, such as cops.”
There was a noise over the phone, as if Rainie was dragging something heavy across the bed.
Quincy frowned. He grew silent and for the first time heard the gulf looming between them. He had a sudden image of her sitting alone on her bed in the dark, cradling her gun for comfort. Things had ended badly last night, and now he couldn’t stay to make them right.
“Rainie?” he asked.
No answer.
“I’m coming back.”
No reply.
“I’m not bailing on you and I’m not bailing on this case. Isolation is not protection,” he said adamantly, though he was definitely babbling now and didn’t expect her to understand what he meant. “Dammit, Rainie—”
She said quietly, coolly, “Have a nice flight.”
Abe Sanders sat down to a hearty three-egg omelette in the back booth of Martha’s Diner. One big advantage of working in the middle of Hicksville, U.S.A.—fresh produce. His omelette oozed with plump mushrooms, premium Tillamook cheese, and, best of all, fresh spinach. Too many places in the city ruined that. They offered canned spinach or, even worse, creamed spinach. Abe shuddered. Not even Popeye would touch that stuff.
No, Bakersville definitely offered good food, including buttermilk pancakes made from scratch. Abe loved pancakes made from scratch. This morning, however, he’d cheerfully gone with what he considered to be the healthy, high-protein choice. The case was progressing well, albeit in a different direction than he’d originally assumed, and he didn’t want to slow himself down by carbo-loading.
He finished his omelette, tipped the cute waitress generously, and drove the short distance to city hall.
The attic sounded quiet as he climbed the narrow wooden staircase. That surprised him. It was nearly eight A.M., late by the last few days’ standards, and he’d assumed that at least Rainie would already be in the task-force center. Seemed she was always the first to arrive and the last to depart. He definitely couldn’t fault her work ethic. Now, if only she’d stop tormenting #2 pencils. He’d bought three boxes before he learned to keep them in the glove compartment of his car.
He opened the attic door, swept the small space with a quick glance. Apparently he was the first one in.
He set about brewing coffee and picked up a banded pile of mail delivered by the mailroom clerk first thing this morning. One overnighted envelope for Rainie, postmarked CA. Probably Richard Mann’s personnel records from the L.A. school. One pink phone-message slip. According to a hard-to-read scrawl, Agent Quincy had to leave on pressing family business and would be gone for a few days. Most likely his daughter, Abe thought with genuine sympathy. Bad break, that. The agent didn’t talk about it, but the word was all over town. Quincy’s daughter had been KO’d by a drunk driver. Abe had already heard the story four separate times while eating in the diner.
The rest of the mail appeared to be junk. He threw it on the corner of Rainie’s desk. She could deal with it later.
Since he seemed to have a moment to himself, he pulled out his cell phone and called home. His wife was in a state. The puppy was having trouble attending to his business this morning. She wanted to take him to the vet.
“For God’s sake, feed him some bran cereal and be done with it.”
She cheered up at that idea. Then, of course, she insisted on putting the puppy on the phone.
“Yeah, yeah, yeah,” Abe said.
The puppy barked enthusiastically.
“You got no bladder control,” Abe told him.
More vigorous barking.
“You’re peeing all over my rugs.”
Very cheerful barking.
“Yeah. Fine. I love you too. Now gimme back my wife.”
His wife came back on. Heaven help him, he was blushing.
“How’s it coming?” she asked.
“It’s coming.”
“Going to be home soon?” He knew she tried her best, but she sounded wistful.
His voice softened. He said, “I love you, honey. And I miss you too.”
Sanders hung up the phone. He was sorry Dave Duncan had slipped through their fingers last night, but now that they knew who they were looking for, it was only a matter of time. The guy was on the run, after all. Probably panicked and scared and thinking he had no place left to hide.
Damn right. Sanders had personally issued the statewide APB late last night. If Duncan was in the area, some local eager beaver would get him in his sights.
Sanders got to work on his report. He didn’t look up again until noon. Then he was startled by the time and the fact that Rainie still hadn’t shown.
Something niggled at him. Something he didn’t like.
Abe Sanders tried her house. Then he tried the radio in her patrol car. And then he started to panic, because he didn’t get answers anywhere.
For all intents and purposes, Officer Lorraine Conner had disappeared from the face of the earth. And even if Abe didn’t care for Rainie’s methods, he knew that just wasn’t like her.
THIRTY-ONE
Saturday, May 19, 12:16 P.M.
Becky sat on her skinny bed, surrounded by stuffed animals and holding Big Bear against her tumm
y. Her parents were talking unhappily in the family room. They were trying to keep their voices down, the way they did when they were mad at each other but didn’t want anyone to know. Becky thought that her mommy had been crying. And her daddy was in one of his Very Bad Moods. He’d boarded up the hall closet when Becky got up this morning. He’d told her that little girls were supposed to sleep in beds, so by God she had better get used to hers.
Becky didn’t think her mommy agreed with that. Becky didn’t care. She had a closet in this room too. She’d picked the hall closet only because it was closer to where her daddy slept. And as much as Becky liked Big Bear, she didn’t know if he’d be any good in a fight. He was only made out of stuffing, after all, with a button for a nose.
Her mommy and daddy were arguing about Danny.
“He needs help, Shep! Serious help that he’s not going to get from a youth detention facility.”
“I know that! But we have to be patient, Sandy. You heard what the lawyer said. If Danny talks to the wrong person, it could wind up in court. Then what kind of help would he get? We have to wait until the forensic exams are done. We’ll know more then.”
“In six months to a year? For God’s sake, he’s already under suicide watch—”
“They’re taking good care of him.”
“There’s no one for him to talk to. You had to hear him this morning. He was begging to die. Goddammit, this is our son!”
Becky slid off her bed with Big Bear. Careful not to make any noise, she crept closer to the family room and pressed herself against the hallway wall.
“There is nothing more we can do,” her daddy was saying roughly. “We gotta just … trust him to get through this.”
“No.”
“Sandy—”
“There is another option.”
“Like hell there is!”
“He did it, Shep! Oh for God’s sake, don’t cover your ears like a child. This is Danny, and he called me at six in the morning to tell me that he’d pulled the trigger and he can’t get it out of his head. He’s only thirteen years old. I don’t know how it all came to this. I wish I did. But somehow … He went in that school, Shep. And he did what he did, and now it’s tearing him up inside. And we can sit here in denial or we can climb into the trenches with him. I think … I think that’s all we have left.”
