by Todd, Ian
“Although some ae the walls hiv red splattered brackish stains oan them, which look tae hiv been there a while and could be dried blood, there is evidence ae recent criminal activity within the building as well,” Superintendent Bison stated.
When asked if the evidence involved fresh blood, Assistant Chief Constable Jack Tipple, who chaired the press conference, nodded before adding,
“The City ae Glesga Polis are at an early stage ae their investigation. Oor forensic teams will be at the scene fur a number ae days and we ask members ae the press tae be patient and let us get oan wae the job unhindered. We intend tae take oor time wae this investigation, tae make sure we discover the causes ae the disturbing evidence found at the scene. As yet, identification ae human matter discovered and who it belongs tae, his still tae be established. We hiv, however, been able tae establish a major underworld figure as hivving links tae the building, through ownership ae the factory, bit Ah am, as yet, unable tae identify that person, at this moment in time.”’
Mary threw the paper aside. Jist two weeks ago, that story and heidline wid’ve been written by her. Noo, aw she hid oan her hauns wis a piece ae dribbling shite oan page thirty seven that gied a dose ae free publicity tae the wummin’s department ae The Hoose ae Fraser, in exchange fur a commitment ae a future interview wae Sir Shuggie Fraser...wow, whit a bloody hoot, that wid be, she groaned. She looked across the stack ae boxes tae where little Miss Chirpy Chirpy Cheep Cheep wis keeping her heid doon.
“Pearl?”
Silence.
“Pearl, Ah know ye’re there. Kin ye come across here fur a second...please?”
The things Ah hiv tae dae aboot here tae get a bit ae respect, Mary sighed tae hersel as the carrot heid and freckled face appeared above the boxes.
“Did ye jist call me, Miss Marigold? Sorry, Ah wis jist packing ma stuff...”
“Look, furget aw that, hen. Come o’er here and take a seat. Ignore ma last instruction, eh?”
“Bit, Ah thought that...”
“Naw, look, here, take a seat,” Mary said, swiping the pile ae torn magazines aff ae the chair and oan tae the flair beside her cramped desk.
Mary looked at Pearl, staunin there, dried tear streaks oan her cheeks, pencil and pad in haun, looking wary. She nodded tae the empty chair and watched the lassie sit doon. It wis hard tae tell if she wis cocky under aw they freckles. Mary still wanted tae fire the arse aff ae the cheeky wee bitch, bit no through papping the blame oan tae her fur Mary’s ain decision tae write her first feature oan whit every wummin in Scotland wis clearly no gonnae be wearing that summer, nor the summer efter that, at they bloody prices. Christ, she’d be lucky tae afford the clothes hersel.
“Look, Ah’m sorry, Ah didnae mean tae ask ye tae clear yer desk...”
“Bit...”
“Naw, listen tae me, it’s nothing tae dae wae you or anything ye’ve said and done,” Mary said quickly, haudin up her haun fur silence. “Ah’ve been upset and under a lot ae pressure since they shifted me fae the crime desk doon tae here in the dungeons. Ah widnae expect ye tae understaun, bit that’s how it is,” she confessed, letting her voice trail aff, as she looked at the white, freckled face under the bushy red hair.
Silence.
“And another thing...ye wur right...the article turned oot worse than whit Ah thought it wid...in fact, it wis pretty shite, if Ah’m being honest,” Mary admitted, feeling her depression starting tae well up again.
“Ach well, at least they stuck it oan page thirty seven, where it widnae be seen, let alone read by anywan, Miss Marigold. Nowan probably noticed it,” Pearl said supportively.
Silence.
“Oh, er, sorry, Ah didnae mean tae...”
Mary couldnae help hersel and burst intae uncontrollable hysterical laugher. She hid tae haud oan tae the desk wae her haun as she buckled up.
“Whit?” Pearl asked her, frowning, before bursting oot laughing hersel.
“Oh, Pearl, ye’re something else, so ye ur, hen,” Mary squealed, gaun aff oan wan again, as she snatched a Handy Andy fae the packet sitting oan her desk and wiped the tears fae her eyes.
“Aye, Ah know, ma teachers always said Ah’d get masel shot wan ae these days, so they did,” Pearl replied matter-ae-factly, as the baith ae them howled again.
The typing pool crowd aw turned tae stare at the two mad yins up in the corner.
“Aw Christ, help ma boab, Ah think Ah’m gonnae pish masel,” Mary managed tae get oot before the cackling took control ae them again.
Efter five minutes and a few false starts, Mary managed tae speak again.
“Look, Pearl, believe it or no, Ah’m no the stuck-up bitch that ye think Ah am. The reason Ah decided tae let ye go is because, no only dae Ah think there isnae a future fur you in this dump, bit Ah’ll be lucky tae last another week masel, so Ah will.”
“Bit why?”
“Because, believe it or no, Ah’m actually good at ma job, bit Ah’m a crime journo, so Ah am.”
“Journo?”
“Journalist. Ah’m no wan fur sitting oan ma fud, writing aboot expensive clothes that nowan kin afford in the first place.”
“Ah think ye dress amazingly. Ah’d love tae be able tae afford tae go oot at night in the stuff ye put oan tae wear tae yer work, so Ah wid.”
“So, why wur ye no intae ma article aboot style then?”
Silence.
“C’mone noo, we’ve goat o’er that. Ye kin say whitever ye want...Ah won’t be offended.”
Silence.
“C’mone noo, Pearl, be honest wae me...Ah won’t take the hump…Ah promise.”
“Well, as long as ye don’t get yer diddies in a twist, here’s ma opinion, fur whit it’s worth. Ye wur clearly searching fur something exciting tae write aboot...something glamorous or whit wummin really thought aboot things these days, bit insteid, ye went fur Biba’s newest creation and Diane Von Furstenberg’s Jersey wrap dresses, hinging aff ae beautiful models that looked as if they hidnae hid a decent pie, beans and chips, since they wur twelve. Ah thought ye wur looking in the wrang places, so Ah did.”
Silence.
“Well, ye did ask. Ah’m sorry,” Pearl quickly added.
“So, why did ye no say something before noo?”
“Ah tried tae, bit Ah wis a bit scared.”
“Whit? Ae me?”
“Er, well, ye’ll probably find this hard tae believe, Miss Marigold, bit there’s jist a wee hint ae Cruella Deville under aw that pan stick, so there is,” Pearl replied, looking at the ceiling, immediately regretting her frankness.
“Ma whit?” Mary demanded, haun automatically touching her greasy face. “Ur ye suggesting Ah’m caking too much Pan Stick oan that kisser ae mine, ya cheeky wee cow? Christ, and here’s me thinking that ye should be applying it by the spade load tae hide they horrible freckles ae yours,” she retorted, before bursting oot laughing, followed by Pearl.
“Look, Ah know ye suggested that Ah dae something oan Hollywood stars or pop stars like Melanie, Joni Mitchell or Carole King, bit it wis jist too predictable.”
“Aye, bit that’s whit people like ma pals wid read aboot, plus they aw wear funky, cool gear, so they dae.”
“And ye think that’s whit should be in the column next week then?”
“Oh no, Ah think ye kin dae better than that.”
“So, why did ye try and get me tae dae an article oan them if ye don’t want me tae write aboot them next week then?”
“Ah only mentioned them because ye wur determined tae write aboot fashion. Ah still think ye could dae better. Wan ae ma pals Kim Sui is at college. She’s jist come back fae London and wis raving aboot a designer called, er, er...”
“Well?”
“Ah’m thinking, Ah’m thinking...ooh...whit wis she called? Aye, right, Ah’ve goat it, a designer called Vivian Westwood.”
“Never heard ae her.”
“Kim Sui said that she’s goat a shoap called Sex, so she his, and she’s gonnae be big.”
“Look, furget fashion, especially if it’s associated wae pumping. Ah’ve married intae a family ae Holy Wullies and things ur bad enough withoot me adding tae it, so they ur. Whit else hiv ye goat?”
“Well, it’s funny ye should ask, bit Ah wis jist thinking aboot something and wis gonnae mention it tae ye before ye decided tae gie me ma jotters...something that ye’d know mair aboot than Ah ever wid.”
“Look, Pearl, Ah thought we’d goat o’er that, eh? Ye’re no wan ae these people who carry a grudge the rest ae yer life, ur ye? Naw, Ah want tae hiv a go and get back at they sexist wankers up the stairs fur oppressing me because ae ma sex.”
“Sex?”
“Being a wummin.”
“Aw, right.”
“So, spit it oot, hen. If it’s shite, Ah’ll say and ye kin dae the same wae any ae ma suggestions ye think ur crap, bit try and keep away fae Vivian Crossword and her sleazy sex shoap. Let’s try and start afresh...fur at least another spread next week, bit jist remember who’s the boss aboot here, eh?”
“Right, well, Ah’m no sure if this is a runner, bit ye know that wummin who goat shot, who wis hivving it aff wae that gangster o’er in Possil?”
“Aye...” Mary said slowly, haudin her breath.
“Well, wan ae ma pals, Senga Jackson, who’s no long started training tae be a nurse, is attending tae her up at The Royal, so she is.”
“Ye’re jesting?”
“No only that, bit the pair ae them get oan like a hoose oan fire, so they dae.”
“Ur ye gonnae suggest whit Ah’m praying ye’re gonnae suggest, hen?” Mary groaned in delight, squeezing her eyes shut and praying.
“And whit wid that be, then?” Pearl asked.
Mary wisnae sure she’d heard right. Wis Pearl trying tae take the piss oot ae her? Whit the hell did she think Ah wis thinking ae, Mary gasped tae hersel.
“Why, access fur me tae interview her...whit dae ye think? We could get a photographer in there as well. Christ, Ah’d be back oan the crime desk as quick as a rat being kicked up a drainpipe, so Ah wid,” she exclaimed.
“Oh right, Ah thought that’s whit ye wur getting at. So, whit aboot the new column fur wummin then?”
“Fur Christ’s sake, Pearl, hiv ye no listened tae a thing Ah’ve said? Who cares aboot the bloody column? This wid allow me back in at the tap, so it wid.”
“And that’s whit ye want, is it?”
“Of course that’s whit Ah want. It wid show they stags whit a mistake it wis tae throw somewan wae ma talent aside like some used Johnny bag, so it wid.”
“Well, Ah wis thinking mair aboot the human side ae her situ…”
“Look, if it’s yersel ye’re worrying aboot, don’t worry…Ah’ll somehow find a place fur ye aboot here. Ah’ll take ye wae me as ma assistant, or if that isnae allowed, Ah’ll speak tae that man ae mine, Benson, and he’ll try and get ye a start somewhere else, so he will. He’s good at that...putting in a word, here and there, fur people. Look at me. It wis him that goat me ma big break,” Mary beamed.
“Benson? Wid that be Benson Flaw, by any chance...the motoring guy?”
“Aye. Why? Hiv ye heard ae him?”
“It wis him that goat me ma job working wae you in the first place, so it wis.”
“Benson? Ma Benson? Ma Benson goat ye yer job here as ma assistant?” Mary shrieked in disbelief.
“Unless there’s two Benson Flaw’s writing the motoring page fur The Glesga Echo, that’ll be him,” Pearl replied, disappointed at her boss’s response tae the mention ae the social worker.
“Ah cannae bloody believe whit Ah’m hearing...the sneaky basturt never mentioned any ae this tae me, so he didnae,”
“Aye, ma maw is involved, up in Springburn, in a by-election tae get this amazing wummin, Helen Taylor, wan ae oor neighbours, elected insteid ae some auld corrupt pensioner who’s been aroond since nineteen canteen. Helen hid mentioned tae Susan Flaw, the local minister’s wife, that Ah hid tae leave school early, insteid ae staying oan tae get qualifications tae get intae university, because we wur skint and oor stuff wis aboot tae be sold aff by the Sheriff officers, so they wur. According tae ma maw, who’s really embarrassed aboot her situation, by the way, Mrs Flaw spoke tae her man, the minister, who in turn spoke tae his brother, Benson Flaw, the motoring guy, aboot whether he could get me a start...and well, here Ah am,” Pearl said, shrugging they shoulders ae hers, looking across at Mary.
“Ah jist cannae believe that conniving git. Wait until Ah see him the night.”
“Why, whit’s the problem? Ye’ve goat me...is that such a bad thing then?” Pearl asked her.
“It’s nothing tae dae wae you, hen. It’s the fact that Benson his gone behind ma back and tried tae help me oot, like the sleekit shitehoose that he obviously is. Ah telt him Ah’d get back oan ma ain two feet withoot any help fae him...or any other man, fur that matter.”
“Ach well, we’re here noo, eh?”
“Whit?”
“Ah said we’re here noo, Miss Marigold.”
“Aye, Ah heard ye the first time. Look, Pearl, who else hiv ye telt yer wee secret story tae,” Mary demanded, voice drapping ten decibels, as she looked aboot tae see if anywan wis lugging in.
“Whit story?”
“Whit Story? Whit story she asks?” Mary exclaimed, throwing her erms in the air. “The bloody gangster and the social worker story...the story-ae-the-year story. Christ, Pearl, ur ye sure ye left school voluntarily?”
“Well, Ah widnae say that.”
“Right, aye, well, okay, Ah get the picture. So, let’s get back tae the story in haun. Ye wur saying yer pal is the best pal ae Mrs whitever her name is…the wan who wis getting pumped by the big gangster...and?”
“And whit?”
“And ye’re no jist making this up tae impress me, ur ye?”
“Why wid Ah dae that?”
“Ah don’t know...ye could be aw overawed at working wae a famous journalist or something, fur aw Ah know.”
“Well, Ah’m no. Ah’m only telling ye whit Ah’ve been telt, and naw, Ah hivnae telt anywan else.”
“So, when will Ah get tae meet yer pal then?”
“Hmm, Ah’m no too sure that wid be wise...at this stage anyway.”
“Why?”
“Because we aw drink in this lounge where journalists probably widnae be welcome, fur a start, so they widnae.”
“Whit? A pub? A pub that widnae want journalists in it? Ur ye jesting me, Pearl? Hauf the pubs in the toon wid gie their eyeteeth tae get a journalist through the door. Ye should see the booze these greedy basturts in here kin guzzle doon their gullets oan a night.”
“No in this pub, they couldnae.”
“Okay, so whit’s so special aboot this pub then?”
“Nothing, bit it’s a bit ae a closed shoap fur strangers, so it is. That’s aw Ah kin say, so it is. It’s difficult tae explain.”
“Right, well, why don’t Ah meet her wance she finishes her shift then?”
“Look, Ah’ve only jist thought this wan up tae help ye oot, so Ah hiv. It’s Thursday...me and ma pals aw get thegither oan a Friday night. Why don’t ye leave it wae me and Ah’ll mention it tae Senga the morra night and Ah’ll get back tae ye, so Ah will?”
“Right, well, Ah’ll gie ye a phone first thing oan Saturday morning.”
“Me? A phone? We don’t hiv a phone at hame,” Pearl scoffed, laughing.
“Right, well, Ah’ll nip up tae see ye then.”
“Naw, Ah don’t think that’ll be a good idea either.”
“Pearl, listen tae me, hen…Ah need tae hiv ma column aw ready tae go by Tuesday efternoon. If this is a non-starter, Ah’ll need tae hiv something tae haun o’er or Ah’m...we’re...in Shite Street. Kin ye appreciate that, hen?”
“Oh, Ah widnae worry too much, Miss Marigold, Ah’m sure Senga will help ye oot, so she will.”
“Pearl, kin ye furget aw this Miss Marigold guff, and start calling me Mary...like everywan else ab
oot here dis? Okay?”
Chapter Forty Five
The Stalker looked at the clock oan the wall above the door opposite his desk. It said twenty past wan. He looked at his wrist watch, which said twenty-five past. He sat brooding fur a full minute and eventually decided that it wis the wall clock that wis disturbing his thought processes. He reached o’er tae the baton that wis sitting, leather wrist grip drooping o’er the edge ae the shelf tae his right, and lifted it up by its shiny grooved haundle. Withoot shifting his back aff ae the back ae the chair, he pulled his erm backwards behind his shoulder and let fly. The baton flew like a clumsy boomerang and smacked the plastic covered clock face deid centre. Before it scattered and landed in twenty odd pieces across his flair, it hid awready disintegrated wae the force ae the baton scudding it. A face appeared roond his door.
“Everything awright, Paddy?” Happy Harry, the desk sergeant asked him, looking fae him tae the baton and debris oan the flair.
“Er, aye, Happy. Ah don’t know whit happened there...loose screw or something. The thing jist jumped aff oan its ain accord, so it did.”
“Aye, well, as long as ye’re happy, Paddy, that’s aw that matters, eh?” Happy said, turning tae leave.
“How’s oor mad flasher?”
“Tucked up in a cell...although we might hiv tae get a doctor in tae hiv a look at they hee-haws ae his. They’re the size ae leaking pomegranates, so they ur. The cheeky fucker says he wants tae press charges, so he dis.”
“Aye, well, tell him we’ve investigated his complaint and he disnae hiv a hard-on’s chance ae making anything stick, so he disnae.”
