by Hart, Eve R.
She’d decided this was what was best for tonight and while I may have wanted her with me, I got that she was right. Plus, I knew she was probably exhausted from being around so many people for this long. I would let her have her quiet time while I gave all of my focus and attention to the club.
I drove her home. She kissed me lightly before heading into her building.
Then I went to celebrate life in death.
CHAPTER TWENTY
Iron
Mason walked into my office without knocking.
I looked up right as he dropped a turkey sandwich down on the desk in front of me.
“Abigail says you have to eat that,” he said with an amused smile as he took a seat on the other side of the desk.
His booted foot came up and rested on the opposite leg.
“She said the same thing to me,” he grumbled as he took a big bite of the matching sandwich in his hand. “You look like hell.”
“I can always count on you to be honest with me,” I said with a small chuckle as I reached for the sandwich. Taking a big bite of my own, I studied him. “You call that lawyer?”
He nodded while he finished chewing.
“I got passed off to someone else in the firm,” he told me. My brows furrowed because I wasn’t all that happy about it. “No, the woman is good. She doesn’t have a lot of experience, but she’s like a damn tiny shark.”
His lips tipped up on one side for a split second.
“You think she can help you and get this shit all straightened out?”
“I do. I think it’s going to take a bit of time but the way she’s going about it is damn smart. She wants me to start keeping track of every little thing.” He paused to take another bite and quickly swallowed it down. “Never go to war without weapons and armor.”
“The fuck? I mean that makes sense but where the hell did that come from?”
“Something she said to me,” he told me with another half smile.
“It’s so obvious it’s kind of dumb,” I told him with a chuckle.
“Yeah, but she was so intense when she said it that she kind of pulled off the badass-Viking-woman-roar thing.”
“Don’t go there,” I warned him with a hard stare.
“Nah,” he said with a shake of his head. “Don’t think I’m her type. Even if I was and stupid enough to cross that line, I’m not into women that like to boss me around.”
His brow went up as he looked at me pointedly.
My head fell back as I let out a laugh that shook my whole body.
Damn, that felt good.
It had been a couple of weeks since the funeral and Dade’s death was still sittin’ heavy on all of us. I couldn’t tell you the last time I actually felt good enough to laugh and forget for a moment.
“How’s Abigail doing?” I asked.
I’d been watching her. I wasn’t the only one. And while she wasn’t all smiles and carefree as she had once been, she didn’t seem like she was about ready to spiral out of control and drown in sadness, either. It could have been a front she was putting on. I wasn’t sure. But I was going to keep making sure that she was alright no matter what.
“I think she misses Dade, as expected, but I think she is tryin’ to stay focused on all the good things she still has in life. Charming and Blade have been keeping a close eye on her.”
“Yeah,” I grunted not sure how I felt about that.
“I think that Charming feels guilty that he couldn’t do more to save Dade. And Blade… well, the whole explosion thing.” Mason paused to think about what exactly he was trying to say. “I think there was some under-the-surface thing with the two of them. Like they both got hurt from that day, both almost didn’t make it out alive. I’m thinking that Blade feels like he has to step in and look over her like Dade would have now.”
He blew out a harsh breath and shrugged.
“I get you,” I told him because I could see it in his eyes that he didn’t feel like he’d explained it good enough. “As long as they aren’t making her feel uncomfortable.”
I hadn’t noticed anything that sent up red flags, but I knew I wasn’t perfect. I could have missed something. Or shit could have been happenin’ when I wasn’t around to see it. Plus, I had a lot of people to keep an eye on right now. More so than normal because of what had happened. You never did know how death would affect someone. And sure, we were a bunch of hard-ass, gruff men that wouldn’t hesitate to put a bullet in someone to protect each other, but that didn’t mean that losing one of our own didn’t cut deep.
“No. I don’t think she even notices. The girls are looking out for her too. Claire has spent some nights with Abigail in her room.”
“Good,” I said with a nod.
I didn’t know about that. I felt like I should have.
Was I slipping? I didn’t want to think I was, and while I realized I was only one person, I couldn’t help but feel like I slept easier at night when I knew everything that was going on.
“Have you heard from Connor?” he asked after we both finished off the last of our sandwiches.
“No, and I hope I fuckin’ don’t. No word means nothing is going on. We need to lay low for a few though, just in case. Don’t give Mullins or anyone a reason to look our way.”
“I agree.” He took a deep breath then changed the subject. “How is Petra’s woman doing?”
“Petra doesn’t tell me much.” I gave him a look saying that he should know better. “But she did say Midori hasn’t come out of her apartment much. Petra has her other girls and her head bodyguard keepin’ an eye on the girl. I think seein’ that hit her hard. You remember your first dead body?”
His eyes slid to the side and I knew he was thinking about it. Just like I was thinkin’ about mine.
“Now just imagine if you didn’t live the kind of life we did. At least we knew that day was gonna come at some point,” I finished with a nod as I blinked myself back to the present.
“Yeah,” he grunted. “You’re right.”
There was a light, hesitant knock on the door.
“She didn’t trust you to make sure I ate, I guess,” I said with a laugh knowing who was on the other side of the door.
“Guess not,” he chuckled.
“Come in.”
“Hey, Iron,” Abigail said walking in with Sparrow on her hip. I couldn’t believe how fast these damn kids were growin’.
“I ate it,” I said as her eyes darted down to the empty paper plate still sitting on my desk with a few scattered crumbs. “Thank you, darlin’.”
She smiled brightly at me but there was something missing in it. It hadn’t been as wide as it once was.
I wouldn’t lie, it made me sad. I hoped that one day she’d get that back.
“Alright, I got stuff to do,” Mason said as he got to his feet and tossed his plate in the trashcan beside my desk. “Thank you, Abigail. Sandwich was good.”
He hugged her, placing a quick kiss on the top of her head, then he was out the door.
“You okay?” I asked her once the door was closed again.
“Sure,” she said. “I thought you might want a little time with Sparrow.”
She moved around the desk and I happily took the alert kid. Sparrow’s little fingers automatically went to my beard and Abigail giggled.
“Where’s Chry?”
“Up at the garage with Ky,” she said with a playful eye roll.
“Of course,” I said with a smile.
I knew Ky wanted that hunk of junk car he was working on so he could fix it up with Chry. Every chance he got, he had the kid in that garage showing him everything. Chry was still young and though he was excited, it didn’t hold his attention for long. Ky was more patient than I would have thought he would be. He knew when it was time to quit and do something else with the kid. I knew it was going to take a while to get the car done, but I didn’t care.
“You got a minute?” I asked her.
“I was about to start din
ner, but I have a few. What do you need?”
“Have a seat.”
She did as I said and looked a little nervous and confused.
“I know Dade asked you a few times if you wanted to move out and you said no,” I said as I moved Sparrow down to my knee and started bouncing her. “I wanted to offer to get you a place if you wanted it.”
Her eyes widened and they were instantly flooded with tears. It broke my heart and I thought that maybe I was going about this all wrong.
“I’m not sayin’ I want you to leave,” I said in a rushed out breath. “You are family and you have a place here for as long as you want it. But I wasn’t sure if being here was too hard for you. I don’t want you to feel like you’re stuck here.”
“Oh,” she said and I saw her relax a little. “No. I like it here. I feel safe here. I know my brother is… gone, but being here, well, I don’t know how to explain it. It makes me feel closer to him, I guess. I feel protected here. And I fear that if I left, I would forget all the good things he had in his life.”
I nodded. Maybe it wasn’t all that healthy but I wasn’t going to say anything. I was going to give her whatever she needed to get through this time in her life.
“Alright,” I said. “I was just checkin’. I love having you here and I know I’m not the only one.”
To that, her face lit up, her smile closer to the one I was used to seeing.
It was clear that Abigail was the type of person that liked to do things for others. Knowing that they were happy made her happy. There wasn’t anything wrong with it as long as she didn’t let people push her around. I knew not a single one of us here did that. So I was going to make sure that every brother knew to let her know just how much they appreciated every little thing she did around here.
“You need anything, you let me know. Okay?”
“Okay,” she said as she rose to her feet. “Thank you, Iron. For everything.”
She reached for Sparrow but I told her I had the kid for a little while. Then she left out the door.
Turning Sparrow around to face me, I plopped her chubby butt onto the top of my desk. My cheeks puffed out as I touched the tip of my nose to hers. As she giggled, her little hands smacked against my cheeks.
“I got somethin’ for ya. Come on, let’s go see what it is.” I stood and held her out like she was flying. After opening the door, I ran to my apartment making wind noises.
“Look at this,” I said as I plopped her in the playpen set up in the living room between the coffee table and the TV.
She instantly reached for the new toy that was hooked on to the side. The thing was all bright colors and noise. It also had a big mirror right in the middle which was what caught her attention first.
Plopping down on the couch, I watched her check it out through the mesh siding.
I reached for my phone deciding it was time to make the call. It was something I’d been thinking about for a while. Ever since that night when Petra came to me freaked out about marriage and kids, trying to convince herself that this wasn’t going to work.
It only took a few minutes to take care of what I needed.
As I set the phone down on my thigh, I felt a sense of calm settle over me.
CHAPTER TWENTY-ONE
Petra
My hands felt almost twitchy as they smoothed down my dress. I glanced in the mirror once more and thought that I looked as put together as if it were any other day. My hair was pulled back into a ponytail, the front and sides smoothed back tightly. My eyes were lined with black and the shadow around them blended perfectly. My lips were red. The red dress I wore gave a playful tease of the swell of my breasts. The bottom hem was tight and hit just above mid-thigh. My black heels had no platform but the heel was high.
Not that I needed the height. But I did like to look people in the eye without having to tilt my head back. It was a power move and I was very much aware of that.
I was dressed like it was any normal day but something caused me to pause.
Before I realized it, I was headed down the elevator and exiting on the fourth floor.
Rowan’s questioning eyes met mine the moment I walked through the office door.
Ever since things had settled down after the Midori situation, I had tried my hardest to leave Rowan to do the job when she was here, only coming down when she needed something. Which was rare. She not only understood what it took to run the Gilded Rose, she also knew how to do it well.
I imagined that coming down here now without a reason was unusual enough to amuse her. And by the look on her face, I was right.
“Never in a million years would I have thought the great Petra Novak would look nervous about something. Has hell frozen over?” she asked with humor laced thickly in her tone. Her head cocked to the side, those thick red curls swinging around her shoulder.
Slowly, I took in a deep breath and straightened my spine even more.
“There is a thing at Iron’s clubhouse. I am going,” I told her flatly.
“A thing? Like an orgy?” Her eyes twinkled with excitement.
“Um, no,” I said and shook my head. I briefly thought how an orgy might make me feel more comfortable than what it actually was. Sex I knew. I understood. I wasn’t shy around it, clearly. But getting to know the people that were close to someone that I’d begun to care about was another story.
“Yeah,” she said shaking her head. “That wouldn’t make you like this.” She waved her hand through the air down the length of my body.
“It’s a gathering. Party? They plan to cook food and… hang out,” I said repeating the words that Iron had basically used to describe it.
“Like a cookout?”
“Yes, that.”
“And you’re going?” she asked and I could tell she was doing her best to hold her laughter back.
“I am making steps to get to know his people,” I told her honestly.
“Oh, my, God. Awwww.” Her reaction was more on the sweet side but it did have a slight ring of teasing to it. “I have to go. I cannot miss this. Nope.”
Then she was picking up the phone and tapping on the screen for far too long.
“I should go now. You have to stay here and do my job,” I told her firmly.
But I could see my words didn’t mean anything to her as she swatted the air like there was a fly in front of her face.
“We all know that Sundays could run themselves and that’s why you gave it to me. There are three clients on the books and that is still hours away. There will be no more than five people in the bar at one given time.”
I knew she was right but I didn’t want her to go.
At least, I didn’t think that I did.
Maybe having her there with me would make me feel more comfortable.
“You rang?” Aurea stepped into the office and walked over to us. “Well, texted, but you know what I mean.” She giggled as her eyes rolled.
“You are in charge tonight,” Rowan told her, effectively not giving me any say-so or power. If it had been anyone else, I would have cut them with a single glare. “I’m taking Royse and Varda, so you won’t be able to use them unless someone specifically calls for them. If that happens, let me know and I’ll send them back right away.”
“Sounds good to me,” Aurea said with a laugh as she rounded the desk and took a seat in the red chair. Feeling its power, she smiled. “I always wondered what it was like to be you.” She looked at me with a glint in her eyes, then winked.
“Did someone say party?” Royse called out as she sauntered into the room.
“And bikers?” Varda lit up with excitement as she followed in after Royse.
“This is going to be so much fun,” Rowan said as she looped her arm through mine. If it had been anyone else…
My brow went up as my eyes cut over to look at her. She ignored my cold, warning stare and pulled me out of the office.
She told me I was driving and I didn’t bother to correct her that there was no o
ther option.
They chatted and giggled the entire way to the compound but I stayed focused on the road.
I pulled up and parked in the front part of the compound. I’d come to know this place well enough by now, but not all of it.
Mostly just the front room and the way to Iron’s apartment upstairs.
Tonight would be the beginning of changing all of that. I think that was what was getting to me. The thing that was causing this uneasy feeling my lower abdomen.
If you’d have asked me if I wanted to do this I probably would have said no. I wasn’t a people person, and I knew it. But I also understood that I had to take steps forward if I wanted to be with Iron.
That was when it hit me.
I wanted to be with Iron.
There was something about him that not only made me realize that I felt incomplete, but filled that new hole.
Yes, I loved him. That was hard enough to admit on a good day. Now that feeling had an explanation, in a way. I realized the reason I loved him. What it was that made me feel that way. Or at least one of them.
“It’s like watching a captive animal being set free,” Rowan said causing my head to turn to the side and look at her. The girls giggled but I didn’t find it humors. “Come on, let’s go find your man.”
This time she didn’t touch me, choosing to lead the way and hoping that I would follow behind her. The other girls were at my back keeping me from turning around. While I didn’t want to run, I did feel very… unsure… about walking inside.
We entered through the front door.
There were a good number of people around but I had seen it fuller before.
The air seemed to go silent the moment I walked in.
I knew I had this effect on people and I wanted to do nothing to change that.
I couldn’t help but wonder if it would once they realized I was here to be a part of this gathering.
“She doesn’t know what to do,” Royse whispered behind me.
