“Why’d you save mine?” I ask, crossing my arms over my chest and scowling back at him.
“What?” he asks, narrowing his eyes. “You’re the one who brought me back to life, not the other way around.”
“Bella stabbed you when you jumped in front of her sword,” I say. “Protecting me.”
A long, tense moment passes.
Nurse Dunlavy clears his throat. “I think I left my tablet on the nurses’ station,” he says. “I’ll be back in a few minutes.” With that, he disappears out the door, leaving me and Ryker in a stare down.
“I wasn’t saving you,” Ryker says at last. “I was doing what any instructor would do. Stepping between students who had gotten too heated.”
“Okay,” I say, my chin jutting out stubbornly. “You saved me for strictly professional reasons, and I repaid the favor. So, I guess we’re even.”
“I guess so.”
“Sorry I got your girlfriend expelled.”
“She’s not my girlfriend.”
“Why not?” I challenge. I don’t really want the answer to that, but I can’t tear my gaze away from his sapphire orbs, away from the troubled furrow in his brow, and the tightness in his chiseled jaw.
“It doesn’t matter,” he says.
“Why are you so scared of me?” I ask. “And don’t give me some shit about how it’s my magic, and you don’t want to be controlled like Bella controlled you, because you know perfectly well I never did that. And you kept fucking Bella even after she didn’t have my magic.”
I can’t believe I just said all that, but now it’s out there, and I wish I could shove it back in my mouth. Ryker’s expression is completely unreadable, which makes me want to scream in frustration. I laid out my whole life in front of him, and he just stares at me without speaking.
“You just found out you had that magic,” he says at last. “Imagine knowing your whole life that you were going to have it.”
I shake my head. “I thought no one knew for sure until the Unleashing.”
“Not officially,” he says. “But there are ways to predict it.”
“Oh, you mean with a lowly psychic?” I ask, rolling my eyes. I wait for him to make a dig about my humble magical background, or insult my mother, but instead, he grimaces and looks down at his hands that are folded on top of the white hospital blanket.
“Never mind,” he mumbles, turning away.
I start to protest, but before I can ask further questions, he hits the call button on the side of the bed. Nurse Dunlavy appears literally a second later, as if he were just standing outside waiting to be at Ryker’s beck and call.
Ugh. I’m so done with the grumpy sorcerer. I’m checking out of here at the first opportunity. After all, Ryker made it quite clear that we’re even, and that saving me wasn’t at all personal. If he wants nothing to do with me, then I’m not going to sit around begging and groveling for his attention like the starstruck nurse. Especially because I want to. There’s something new between us, something deeper than I’ve felt before. A completely unwelcome emotion, considering the complicated feelings I already had.
This is something new, something I haven’t felt with anyone else. This time, I know it’s just the magic, the consequence of giving him so much, of flowing into him the way I did. There was intimacy in what I did, though not in the sexual way. To take over someone’s body like that, to bring him back from the dead, it somehow bound me to him. And I’m pretty sure he feels it, too, and that’s why he made sure to tell me it was strictly business. I’ve lied to myself long enough to recognize it in someone else.
Well, that’s just super. I have some weird bond, some tie, to the worst of all the sorcerers. We both know it, and we’re both too proud to acknowledge it. And the worst part is, I don’t know how to get rid of it.
Chapter Nine
“You did it!” Asher crows, holding up both hands in a sign of victory.
“Brought Ryker back from the dead?” I ask, falling into step beside him on our way to class the following Monday.
“No,” he says. “You got a Bella expelled. And not just any Bella. Bella Lu.”
“I thought Blonde Bella was head bitch.”
“Yeah, but Bella Lu is the headmaster’s great niece or some shit.”
I remember her saying something about being related to him, and my heart sinks. She’ll definitely be back. Her suspension will last until the drama blows over and Ryker gets out of the hospital. But she won’t be expelled if she’s related to Headmaster Orville.
“Is everyone here related to someone powerful?” I ask.
“Not everyone,” Asher says. “But magic does run in families, and this is the best magic academy in the country. Obviously the big shots in the magical community are going to send their progeny here.”
“Great,” I say. “Now Headmaster Orville is going to hate me, and her suspension will never stick, even though she basically murdered someone.”
“Wouldn’t be the first time,” Asher says. “Believe me, that psycho should have been expelled from the high school for magical progeny years ago. I figured once we got to her grandpappy’s school, there was no getting rid of her.”
“Has she ever gotten in trouble for that kind of thing before?”
He shrugs. “Many have tried, but none have succeeded. Until you.”
“Thanks,” I say, a smile tugging at my lips. “I guess.”
We come up on the other two Bellas strolling down the sidewalk like they don’t have a care in the world, expensive coffee drinks clutched in their well-manicured hands.
“One down, two to go,” Asher whispers, elbowing me in the side.
I hold in a laugh, but the Bellas must hear us, because Blonde Bella turns around to cast a withering glare over her shoulder. When she sees that it’s me, her eyes widen.
“You conniving bitch,” she hisses, her eyes narrowing to slits. “I can’t believe you got my best friend expelled.”
“Hey,” says Brunette Bella, looking wounded. “I thought I was your best friend.”
“Shut up,” Blonde Bella growls through her teeth. “You’re both my best friends.”
“Oh,” says her friend, flipping her shoulder length bob back. “Okay, then cool. Let’s take this bitch down.”
“Try it and see what happens,” I challenge. “Bella Lu did.”
Blonde Bella’s nostrils flare, her eyes burning with hatred. “You might have had me fooled into thinking we could be friends for one second, but you showed your true colors. You better sleep with one eye open, because I’m coming for you, bitch.”
“You thought I’d want to be your friend?” I ask. “Oh, that’s cute.”
“You did me a favor, and I repaid it,” she says. “The grace period’s over. You’re going to pay for what you did.”
“I’m already paying,” I say. “I’m paying for being a gullible idiot who thought you might have a speck of human decency inside and not getting you all expelled when I could have. But trust me, I learned my lesson. You’re all a bunch of sociopaths who think the rules don’t apply to you.”
“You could use some people like us on your side,” Brunette Bella says. “Too bad all you’ve got is a beard and a zombie maker.”
“She’s the beard,” Blonde Bella snaps.
“Whatever,” Brunette Bella says, waving a lazy hand. “Let’s go learn some spells to set her hair on fire.”
“Try it,” I snarl. “I dare you. I can’t wait to get your ass kicked out of here, too.”
Blonde Bella shakes her head and pushes through the doors into the building, but I’m too pissed to go in. I head over and hop up on a picnic table instead. Asher joins me, absently twirling his nunchucks.
“Could she really light my hair on fire?” I ask, running my fingers through my long blonde strands.
“In class, maybe,” Asher says. “She’d probably say it was an accident. If you couldn’t definitively prove otherwise, she wouldn’t get expelled, though.”
“Da
mn it,” I say. “Why didn’t I do it when I had the chance?”
“Because you’re a better person than she is.” He lets out a wistful sigh, and I look up to see Topher crossing the lawn toward the College of Dark Arts building.
“Just ask him out,” I say, nudging Asher.
“No way,” he says, looking dejected. “I don’t even know if he likes guys. I usually have great gaydar, but for some reason, I can’t tell with him. He’s such a mystery.”
He lets out another heaving sigh.
“You’ve got it so bad,” I say, laughing.
“You’re one to talk,” he says, glancing around. “Speaking of, what ever happened to your hot guards? I miss them following us around.”
“I’m allowed a little freedom this semester,” I say. “Headmaster Orville said I could walk around campus without them as long as I’m with a friend, and if I leave campus, I have to take a guard.”
“Wow,” Asher says. “I guess the danger’s really over.”
“Well, we know who was trying to get me, and as long as we stay on campus, the wards against Lilith should be strong enough that I’m safe from her. The Bellas are another matter.”
Asher laughs and hops up, holding out a hand to help me up. “Don’t tell me you’re afraid of those sad little rich girls.”
“Nah,” I say. “I just wish they’d leave us alone. But now that I’ve picked off one of their herd, I have a feeling things are going to get even worse.”
“Maybe Elowen could put a spell on them to make them nice,” he whispers as we head toward the building.
“I’m not sure that’s possible.”
He shrugs. “Dark magic is supposed to be able to change people’s minds.”
“We’re not allowed to use dark magic.”
“Of course not,” Asher says. “Interfering with someone’s free will is the great taboo.”
“That’s what the Bellas did,” I say, narrowing my eyes at him. “With my magic.”
“You know your magic isn’t just light magic, Jade,” he says. “You have both light and dark magic.”
“Right,” I say, remembering something the sorcerers said when Lilith tried to take me. “But I have to learn light magic first, because I could go dark if I let the dark part take me over.”
I consider that on my way to my class, and through the rest of the day. I know a lot of light magic already. Maybe it’s time I started to embrace the dark side… Just a little. Just enough to do good with it, to save the people I love. If I could change my father’s mind, or Silas’s…
The thought of freedom sends a shiver through me, and goosebumps break out on my arms. Could it really be so easy?
No. Of course not. If it were, someone would have already done it.
Silas works with dark magic, after all. He would know if I was trying to trick him. Hell, he’d probably turn it back on me and end up making me fall in love with him or something equally abhorrent. In fact, he probably has some kind of dark magic spell on my father that’s making him want to stay there and work for him.
The thought fills me with rage.
My father is not a strong dark wizard. He’s no equal to Silas… Or to me.
I hate myself for thinking of doing this to him, but if I’m only breaking the illegal spell Silas has on him…
He’s just a human. I probably wouldn’t even get in trouble for influencing him. And I wouldn’t make him do anything terrible, anything that could hurt him. I only want to make him see sense, to open his eyes to Silas’s manipulation.
And everyone keeps telling me it’s my magic, that I should control it, embrace it. So why not learn all of it? If I’m not supposed to be afraid of my own magic, why is everyone keeping me from half of it?
By the end of the day’s classes, I’ve come to a decision. I need to at least begin to learn the dark side, to see what the other half of my magic is all about. I don’t want to learn it from Lilith, that’s for damn sure. Luckily, I have a friend in the College of Dark Arts who owes me a favor.
After dinner, I make my way toward the dorm where Elowen stays, tucked off behind the Dark Arts building. I glance over my shoulder every few steps, so used to being followed by my guards that it seems impossible that I’m actually alone. I feel kind of bad for ditching Asher, but I can’t drag him into this. If I get in trouble, so be it. I’m not taking my BFF down with me.
I step into the lobby of the dorm, only to see someone at the front desk. Well, damn. If it isn’t Topher Stephens himself. I smile tightly and turn away to call Elowen while he watches me with keen interest.
“Hey, I need to see you,” I say when Elowen answers her phone. “I’m down in the lobby. Want to come get me?”
“You’re here?” she asks in a panicked voice.
“Yeah,” I say. “Is that okay?”
“I don’t think you’re supposed to come into the Dark Arts dorm.”
“I have dark magic, too, Elowen.”
“Yeah,” she says slowly. “But you also have light. Aren’t you scared it’s going to turn you?”
I can’t help but laugh. “I think I’ll be okay,” I say. “I doubt I’ll turn dark from one visit.”
After a long pause, she agrees and hangs up. I bounce on my toes, trying not to notice how intently Topher is watching me. A minute later, Elowen appears at the bottom of the stairs.
“Did you sign in?”
“No,” I say, glancing at Topher.
He holds up a tablet, and I approach the desk. “What brings you here, Jade?” he asks with a pleasant smile.
“Just here to see my friend.”
“I see,” he says, turning it around so I can sign in. “I suppose it’s not so unusual for you to have a friend in this college, considering your magic.”
“Yep,” I say, pushing the tablet back.
“Has anyone introduced you to the dark parts of your magic?”
Fuck. How does he know that’s what I’m thinking? Am I really that obvious? I glance at Elowen, but she only chews on a hangnail and watches with her usual skittish expression.
“I’m told I’m not ready for that,” I tell Topher. My heart thuds in my chest as I gaze into his deep, dark eyes. There’s something terrifying about him, and most of me wants to turn and run up the stairs, away from him. But another part of me is drawn to that darkness. It calls to mine the way Lilith did.
“I see,” he says. “Well, when you’re ready, you know where to find me.”
With that, he takes the tablet back and sets it aside, turning his attention back to the book that lays open on the desk. Before I can think better of it, I lean closer to see the title of the book.
“Ready?” Elowen asks.
“Yeah,” I say, jumping back like I was caught doing something bad. I know I’m only drawn to Topher because he has magic that matches the unexplored side of mine, but I still feel guilty about it. I have Professor Darius. I trust him. I know I’m not ready to learn.
And yet… Isn’t that exactly what I came here for?
In Elowen’s room, I look around, realizing I’ve never been here before. Her roommate’s side of the room is straight-up goth, but Elowen’s is more normal. It’s somehow plain and cluttered at once, as if she tried to copy someone else’s idea but didn’t quite have the interior decorating skills to pull it off. Somehow, it’s just so Elowen. Suddenly, I can’t help the swell of affection for my awkward, nervous little friend.
“Why are you looking at me like that?” she asks, her eyes darting around the room.
“Is your roommate here?”
“No,” she says.
“I just realized I’ve never been here before,” I say. “That’s not being a very good friend.”
Elowen snorts softly. “I’m the bad friend.”
“Do you want to make it up to me?” I ask, sinking onto the edge of her roommate’s black and hot pink comforter.
“How?” Elowen asks, looking like she’s about to panic.
“Well,
I was thinking maybe you could teach me some basics,” I say. “You know, whatever you learn in class, you could come home and teach me.”
“You want to learn dark magic?” Elowen asks, her eyes widening. “Why?”
“I don’t think I should tell you,” I say. “In case I get in trouble.”
She gulps. “I’ll get in trouble anyway, for teaching you. And besides, aren’t you afraid of going dark?”
“Not as much as you’d think,” I admit.
Elowen nods like that makes sense, and I’m not sure whether to be offended or complimented that she thinks I can handle dark magic, for whatever reason.
“I don’t know,” she says, chewing at her nails until I think they’re going to bleed if she bites them any shorter. “I mean, what if it turns me darker? To be a teacher, you have to have a lot of control. What if I hurt you? Or your magic somehow makes mine stronger, and…”
“Hey, you’re the one who said you wished you had some of my magic so guys would be drawn to you,” I remind her, trying to lighten the mood. “Besides, my magic is pretty well drained at this point. I could just try out a few things while it charges. I’ll stop before it gets strong enough to hurt anyone.”
Elowen hesitates a long minute, and I know she doesn’t want to do this. If I was a better friend, I wouldn’t make her. But I need to make sure my father is safe first. Then I’ll stop.
“Okay,” she says at last.
“You’ll do it?” I ask, jumping up. “Awesome. Thank you so much.”
I think about hugging her, but I’m not much of a hugger, so I hold back. We stand there awkwardly for a minute, and then I turn to her wall, where she’s pinned up a poster of a fae prince along with a dozen pictures of her and Asher in high school. There are a couple pictures of them at the Academy, and one with all three of us from the beginning of the year.
“You and Asher go back a long way, huh?” I ask.
“Yeah,” she says. “I mean, he’s been my best friend for three years.”
“It must have been pretty hard for you last semester,” I say. “I hope you don’t feel like he picked me over you. He loves you, Elowen. He just wanted you to find your own way.”
“I know,” she says. “He’s my best friend, but he’s never going to do the wrong thing even for a best friend. He took your side because you were right. And it’s not like he was my boyfriend.”
Academy of Sorcery: Term 2: Fallen Master Page 7
