by McNab, Andy
He breathed deeply, tilted his head and stared above him. He was in the habit of looking at the dazzling Afghan skies whenever he could. The same stars must be hanging over Wiltshire but here the air was so clear that there was real depth of vision and you could see thousands, millions more stars.
He thought about the Taliban fighters, sitting in their compounds, smoking and talking and looking up at the same night sky. They had been staring at this incredible overhead display all their lives. It was, for them, a part of being at home, like the intense summer heat, the poppies, the mountains and the dust storms.
He passed the boss with the woman from Intelligence. The woman was smoking, Gordon Weeks was talking. Dave could understand how, after such a day, the boss would want to spend some time with this woman if he liked her. Weeks was so intent on what he was saying that he didn’t even see Dave.
‘Want one, Sarge?’ asked some lads from 2 Section who were also walking the perimeter in a small group, unusually silent. Their faces shone out of the dark when they lit their cigarettes.
‘All right,’ said Dave.
‘But, Sarge,’ came McKinley’s voice. ‘You don’t smoke.’
‘I do tonight,’ Dave told him, inhaling deeply.
‘Any news on Ben or Ryan, Sarge?’
‘Ben’s doing better than Ryan. Although Ben took more shrapnel than we realized.’
‘What about Ryan’s arm, Sarge?’
‘Unfortunately they’ve had to take it off below the elbow.’
The lads looked as though he had punched them.
‘Is he going to make it?’ asked McKinley quietly. ‘He lost a lot of blood.’
‘I don’t know. He might not.’
‘How about the others?’
‘They took a lump of shrapnel out of Angus McCall’s arm. Kev Swift from 3 Section had shrapnel too. But they’ll be back in a couple of days.’
Dave strolled on. He was aware that his hand was shaking slightly as he smoked. He moved the cigarette into the other hand. That shook, too. He hated this involuntary movement and tried to still it but the tremor would not go away. He yawned. He wished he could just go to sleep. The stress of the day had left his body wrung out.
Sol, going back from the cookhouse after dinner with the lads, saw Dave smoking. He had never seen that before. Should he go and speak to him, or would Dave rather be alone before his difficult interview? He decided the sergeant looked as though he wanted to be alone.
Sol followed the boys back to the tent. They were hovering in the entrance. Finn put his finger to his lips as Sol approached.
Inside, someone was sitting alone on his cot talking to himself. Jamie Dermott.
‘Hop, Frog, hop! Your mummy’s waiting and your daddy’s looking for you! Hop across the big, wide pond!’
‘They put him on pain relief for the bullet bruise,’ muttered Streaky. ‘Maybe the medic gave him too much.’
‘How can I cross a pond as big and wide as that, Frog asked Snail?’
Finn’s eyes were glittering.
‘But Snail didn’t know. He asked Fish. But Fish didn’t know. Finally Frog asked the Great Crested Newt. And the Great Crested Newt said: hop, Frog, hop, that’s what frogs do!’
Finn, with a delighted smile, balanced on one foot, arms out, and began to hop over to Jamie’s cot. Mal followed him.
‘Hop! Hop!’
Bacon wasn’t far behind, yelling: ‘Hip-hop!’
‘Because,’ added Binns, hopping after them badly with his bandaged hands waving, ‘that’s what frogs do!’
Sol stood still, his arms crossed, watching and shaking his head. They had spent the morning in a minefield. Two men in their platoon had been very seriously wounded. And now they were jumping around like kids.
Jamie scowled as the ragged line of men hopped towards him. Mal squeaked: ‘Great Crested Newt, how can I cross the pond?’
Finn replied, in a deep voice: ‘I am the wise Great Crested Newt and I say: Hop, hop, you little green bastard, that’s what fucking frogs do!’
Mal squeaked: ‘Oh, Snail, how can I cross the great wide pond?’
Finn was breathless now.
‘You’re nothing but a little green slimeball so go drown yourself.’
‘Oh, Fish, how can I . . .’
Sol shook his head again. Jamie stood up without smiling.
‘Fuck off, shitheads. I was recording a story for my kid so he won’t forget my voice. And you’ve ruined it.’
They stopped hopping.
‘Now I’ll have to record the whole thing again and it’s about the fifth time of trying because there’s never any peace around here.’
Sol walked into the tent.
‘Lads, leave him alone. He’s been crawling around mines and he’s cut and bruised from a round. Give him some space.’
‘Oh, shit, man, we could help you,’ said Bacon.
‘The only way you can help me is by letting me get on with it.’
‘No, man,’ insisted Streaky. ‘We can do the sounds. Just you have a listen to Binman . . .’
Binns did a frog noise.
‘That’s quite good,’ Jamie conceded.
‘Here’s a great crested newt . . .’
Jamie laughed. So did the others.
‘See, your kid will really enjoy it with us in the background. Where’s the story book?’ asked Bacon.
‘There isn’t one.’ Jamie showed them some scrunched pieces of paper. ‘I’m writing it myself.’
‘Ooooh, yeah!’ said Bacon enthusiastically. ‘This is going to be a 1 Section production. Tell me what happens to that frog!’
Jamie tried to smooth out the scrunched-up paper. He looked embarrassed. ‘Well, I haven’t worked it all out yet. But basically a bird carries him in its beak all the way across the world and he has to get back to his mum and dad.’
‘Aaaaaaaaah,’ said Mal and Angus, who were cleaning their weapons now.
‘And he has to keep asking the way. He crosses the desert and a big pond and he has to climb a mountain . . .’
‘I can do the wind on the mountain. Whhhhhhhhhh. How’s that?’ asked Bacon.
‘Here’s the frog crossing the pond,’ said Binman. ‘Plop. Plop. Plop.’
Finn said: ‘It’s from you to your kid, right? So the frog comes under enemy fire. And a round hits him but he’s wearing his frog armour and it bounces off . . .’
Binns did the rounds bouncing off.
‘Ker-ping!’ said Bacon.
Then they did machine guns and a bit of mortar.
‘OK, OK, I get it,’ said Jamie before they could get carried away. ‘I’ll write it and you can help me record it.’
‘You been doing this ever since we got to Sin City?’ asked Sol.
‘No. I thought of it when I got hit by that round. And then after the minefield today I knew I had to do it for Luke. In case . . .’ His voice trailed away.
‘In case anything happens to you,’ said Streaky.
Jamie nodded.
‘You’ll soon have time to record all the stories you want,’ said Finn casually. ‘We’re going on a little holiday.’
‘Oh, yeah?’ said Sol.
‘I reckon we could do with a break. After what happened today. Look at Binman, all pale and thin because he’s spent the day nipping in and out of unexploded mines.’
‘I’m always pale and thin,’ said Binns miserably.
Sol said: ‘I don’t know about any breaks.’
‘Ah. But you don’t play blackjack with my mate Marty.’
Finn and Martyn Robertson had become friends over a pack of cards.
‘The OC is pissed off with the civvies for always going to the same place every day . . .’
‘Where we went with Emily?’ asked Mal.
‘Jackpot, Marty calls it. Well the Engineers are going to build a whole new camp there. A temporary one. We’re going for a week while the civvies measure up their oil field.’
Sol looked suspicious.
/> ‘First I’ve heard of it.’
‘Just you wait, the boss will be announcing it soon. We’re going to Jackpot where there’s nothing to do all day but tell frog stories and get our heads down while the civvies mess about with their black boxes.’
Sol still looked sceptical.
Finn grinned at him. ‘We need some R&R. So I’m looking forward to it, lads.’
Sol decided to catch Dave and ask if he knew anything about a temporary camp at Jackpot. He thought Finn might be right but he didn’t think his 2 i/c should be first with the news. He got as far as the entrance to the tent when he looked at his watch and realized that Dave would be going into his interview with the OC now.
Chapter Forty-two
JENNY PADDED OVER TO AGNIESZKA’S HOUSE THREE TIMES BUT DID NOT find her at home. She decided to try again in the evening when Vicky was in bed. Trish was irritated.
‘What do you have to tell her that’s so important?’
‘Just something a bit awkward.’
‘What’s wrong with the phone, then?’
‘Her English goes to pieces on the phone.’
Trish shook her head.
‘You be careful,’ she said. ‘Take your mobile so you can call me if anything happens.’
‘For heaven’s sake, Mum. If anything happens you’ll hear me yelling I’ll be so close.’
It had rained earlier and the warm evening air felt refreshing. Jenny breathed deeply. In another month her life would be changed again. There would be a tiny new demanding person in the centre of her world alongside Vicky.
She felt relaxed. Now that Trish was here, her hands and ankles weren’t so swollen and she felt well again. She strolled around the corner. Some older children were still playing at the rec. The grass had been mown and she inhaled its sweet smell. A man with a big grey dog passed her and smiled. She could hear the soothing summer coo of a wood pigeon.
Ever since she’d known she was pregnant she had been sure of one thing: Dave wouldn’t be in Wiltshire for the birth. They’d both thought deployment was inevitable. She’d braced herself for the date and when they were given it she was prepared for the knowledge that she would give birth alone. So she’d shrugged.
‘Oh, well, there’s no way round it.’
He’d been miserable: ‘Shouldn’t have married a soldier, Jen. An accountant would have been a nice, safe option.’
She’d kissed his unhappy face to say it was all right and that she could cope without him.
But now the baby wasn’t far away. The days would still be fine but there would be a nip in the air every morning and spiders’ webs in the garden. And she could no longer pretend it didn’t matter that Dave wasn’t here for her. Because it did.
She rang Agnieszka’s bell. After a long time the door opened cautiously and a section of Agnieszka’s face appeared through the crack.
‘Hi, it’s only me!’ The door was on a chain. ‘It’s me! Jenny!’
At this point the chain should have clinked off the hook and the door should have swung open. But it didn’t.
‘Agnieszka, is this a bad time?’
‘Is very difficult because I busy with Luke.’
‘There’s something I have to say to you,’ Jenny said. ‘It will only take a minute. It’s important.’
‘Yes?’
Agnieszka still did not open the door.
‘It’s a bit difficult to say it on the step . . .’
‘What? I don’t understand, Jenny.’
Jenny shifted her weight from one foot to the other impatiently. She felt dizzy suddenly.
‘Can’t I come in for a minute?’
Agnieszka took the chain off and opened the door only far enough for Jenny to step onto the mat. But she did not move aside to allow her visitor in further.
‘Jenny, house is big, big mess, I am very embarrassed,’ she said. And she did look embarrassed. Her eyes were big and her face was red. She was holding a toy, a set of big plastic keys, the sort that lit up and played music if the child pressed them.
‘I’m not staying,’ said Jenny, her eyes flicking past Agnieszka to the living room. She could see no sign of the mess. Not that she cared.
‘Listen, I’ve been thinking about that text message. There’s a good reason the lads can’t use their phones in Afghanistan. It’s because the signals get intercepted and used by the Taliban. And I think that’s what happened to you, Agnieszka. That shitty message came from the Taliban. To upset you and frighten you.’
Agnieszka looked shocked.
‘From Taliban?’ she echoed. ‘No, it just silly joke.’
‘I think it came from the enemy. They have the technology to read all Jamie’s messages to you, it’s not hard. That’s why our boys can’t use their mobiles out there.’
Agnieszka bit her lip.
‘I don’t like to think Taliban send me a message.’
‘Me neither. And I’m feeling really bad now. Because you’ve asked me to keep it a secret from Dave and I don’t like keeping secrets from him.’
Agnieszka looked terrified.
‘It’s OK. I gave you my word I won’t tell him. And I won’t. But for everyone’s sake, I want you to promise that you’ll ask Jamie to stop using it.’
‘Stop using mobile?’
‘Yes. It’s too dangerous for everyone.’
‘But how he text me?’
‘On the army satellite phone, like everyone else.’
‘Huh, he used to buy lot of minutes but these other men also buy them so Jamie don’t get so many.’
Jenny began to feel angry. She had a prickling sensation under her skin. She knew her face was reddening.
‘We all have to manage on thirty minutes a week! How do you think the rest of us feel?’
Agnieszka’s even face assumed that dissatisfied, sulky expression Jenny had seen before.
‘You must stop using the mobile,’ Jenny repeated. ‘Or I’ll have to tell him.’
‘So you tell Dave after all!’
Jenny’s head was spinning.
‘Only if you don’t stop. And now you know the Taliban can intercept signals, surely you want to stop! It’s dangerous, Agnieszka, it could be dangerous to you, too.’
Agnieszka’s face drooped into a dissatisfied pout. ‘I don’t see how it dangerous for Jamie to text me from base. He don’t send text about operations.’
‘They’ve got your number, Agnieszka. They know you’re a British Army wife. They could even locate you in the UK. Isn’t that a bit scary?’
Agnieszka did not look scared. She looked sulky. Jenny had promised Dave that she would try to like this woman. She was certainly trying. But it was hard. Her head began to ache.
‘And how I tell him? Because army monitor talk on satellite phone, they hear if I ask him to stop with mobile.’
‘You’ll have to find a way to do it. With hints and things.’
Agnieszka looked annoyed.
‘Please, Agnieszka, don’t ask me to have secrets from Dave.’
‘OK. OK. I tell Jamie not to use it.’
‘Thanks very much. I know it’s hard for you. But it’s hard for all of us.’
Agnieszka opened the door a little wider to indicate that Jenny should go now. She looked, thought Jenny as she stepped outside and the door shut swiftly behind her, as though she had agreed to do an enormous favour.
Jenny did not notice the smell of the newly mown grass any more. She felt angry. If anyone was entitled to texts and extra minutes with her husband it should surely be a woman about to have a baby in his absence. She decided to walk around the block. Because despite everyone’s insistence that she sit around resting to keep her blood pressure down, she had found that walking was more relaxing than watching TV and drinking endless cups of tea with Trish.
And why had Agnieszka been so determined to leave her standing on the doorstep? She had clearly not wanted her there at all. Jenny walked faster, her belly preceding her like a big, round wheelbarrow. Her h
ead was spinning and throbbing now. She walked in time with the pain.
It was only when she passed an old red Volvo parked at the end of a quiet side street that she realized. First she recognized the Volvo, then she remembered whose car it was. So that was why Agnieszka had not wanted her to come inside the house. That was why she was so impatient to get Jenny out of the door. Because that man was there.
