‘Well, what is it?’
‘Oh, for goodness’ sake.’ Rhona opened the envelope and took out a thumb drive. ‘Here. Roses and electronic media. And...’
She handed the card to Alex. Leo’s firm, flowing handwriting.
Thank you.
She dropped the card onto her desk as if it had just burned her fingers.
‘So they are from Leo?’ Rhona raised her eyebrows.
‘Yes.’
Rhona slumped into her chair. ‘What do you want to do about it, honey?’
‘I... I don’t know. I can’t do anything about it.’ She and Rhona had been through all this. She’d taken a risk and it hadn’t worked out. That had hurt so badly that she couldn’t take another.
‘What do you say I put the flowers in water and go down and get a couple of coffees from the shop? Then we’ll think about the thumb drive.’
‘Okay. Thanks.’ Alex pushed the flowers away from her as if they might burn her.
The flowers were arranged, coffee was fetched, and she and Rhona sat in front of Rhona’s computer.
‘Sure you want me to see this?’ Rhona slotted the thumb drive into the USB port.
‘Yeah. It’s okay. Yellow roses, right?’ The message was friendship. It was probably photographs from the radio station, something like that.
Rhona clicked on a folder and then on the icon inside. A sound file. A familiar jingle sounded through the speakers and the two women looked at each other. It was Leo’s medical hour.
‘You want me to turn it off...?’
‘No. Listen with me.’ She’d come this far and she couldn’t go back now.
Then Leo’s voice. At first, all she could hear was the smooth, sexy sound and then she began to focus on what he was actually saying.
‘We’ve tackled a lot of very difficult issues here on the medical hour, and we pride ourselves on making this a place for people to talk. I’ve come to understand that sharing our experiences is not just a way of healing for ourselves, but for others, which is why I’ve decided to talk about this very personal issue. My twin brother took his own life when we were twenty-two. I’m pleased to welcome Dr Celia Greenway, who is a consultant psychologist...’
‘He’s talking about Joel...’ Alex turned to Rhona, her hand over her mouth, tears streaming down her face.
‘Who? Never mind. Are we sticking with it?’
‘Yes... Yes.’
A woman was talking now...
‘Leo, I’ve spoken at some length with both you and your family, and I want to make it clear to everyone listening that Leo and his family have given me permission to speak about some of the personal issues that came out of our discussions. What would you say was the most difficult emotion for you?’
‘Guilt... I wasn’t able to talk about some of the things which happened on the night of my brother’s death for many years.’
‘In fact, not until you and your family talked to me?’
‘No...’
He was going to crack up. Alex could hear it in his voice. But somehow, through an obvious effort of will, Leo was holding it together. He spoke to each caller in turn, encouraging them to talk and answering all of the questions that were put to him honestly. With the usual jingles and the break for the news edited out, the recording lasted three-quarters of an hour, and Alex and Rhona listened in silence.
Finally, he wrapped the programme up.
‘I want to thank Celia for being with us—with me—tonight and, as I said, the lines will be open for another hour so that anyone who’d like a call-back can leave their number. And finally I want to thank the very special person whose own courage inspired me to take this first step tonight. Goodnight, everyone.’
Rhona let out a long breath. ‘That whole programme was the most moving thing I’ve heard in a long while.’
‘Yes.’ Alex felt almost numb.
‘What does it mean?’
‘It means...’ She shrugged. ‘He means exactly what he says. Leo always means what he says on the radio.’
‘He wants...you and him?’
‘No. It’s what he said. He’s taking the first step on a long road. It takes a long while to turn a life around.’
‘So what are you going to do?’
‘I don’t know.’ Alex thought hard. ‘Yes, I do. Those pictures of Alice you took the other day, with her blade...’
‘Alice?’ Light dawned suddenly on Rhona’s face. ‘He was the anonymous donor?’
Alex nodded.
‘That’s generous.’ Rhona nodded in approval. ‘You know, I thought he was a bit of a rotter at first, but he’s not such a bad guy at all.’
‘No. He’s a very good guy. Just not my guy.’
* * *
If anything, Leo’s message had given Alex some closure, and she guessed that maybe that had been his intention. She was getting back on her feet again. Bruised and still feeling broken, but she was getting there.
Justin’s voice on the phone didn’t make her heart leap, hoping that he had some news of Leo. She knew what Leo was doing, and he wished her well, and she could put those thoughts away now.
‘Alex, how are you?’ Justin didn’t stop for an answer. ‘I want to ask you a favour.’
‘What is it?’ As long as it had nothing to do with Leo, she’d be happy to do whatever Justin asked.
‘Will you listen in at ten tonight? Just for fifteen minutes.’
‘Ten o’clock? That’s the music hour, isn’t it?’
‘Yes, on Friday nights it’s two hours. But that doesn’t matter. All I’m asking is fifteen minutes. I need you to promise.’
Whatever this was, Justin was being a bit overdramatic. But that was Justin. ‘Okay. Fifteen minutes, at ten o’clock. What do you want me to do then?’
‘Feedback. That’s all. Do you promise?’
‘Yes, I promise.’
‘Fantastic. I’ll put you on the list. Got to go...’
* * *
Alex settled down on the sofa with a cup of tea and a pencil and pad, and switched on the radio at exactly ten o’ clock. She’d listen for fifteen minutes, give her feedback and then go to bed. There was going to be a climbing group going down to Sussex tomorrow and she had to be up early.
‘And this is Clemmie Rose, with two hours of music for you to keep you cool and relaxed on a Friday evening. If there’s someone out there you want to send a message to, then just call in. But first...’
Alex picked up her pencil. This must be it.
‘Hi, Clemmie.’
What? When Leo’s voice sounded on the radio Alex threw her pencil back down in disgust. What was Justin playing at?
‘You want to say something, I gather?’
‘Yes. This is a message for Lieutenant Tara—’
‘The Lieutenant Tara?’ Clemmie interjected.
‘No, not the Lieutenant Tara. Me. He means me,’ Alex shouted crossly at the radio.
‘The lady in question knows who I mean, and this is my message to her.’
‘Go ahead, Leo.’
‘Well, stop interrupting him then...’ Alex had really liked Clemmie when she’d met her. Now she was beginning to get on her nerves.
Leo spoke, his voice clear and impassioned. ‘There’s no reason on earth why you should even listen, but I’m begging you to think about what I have to say. I love you and I want you to take me back. I promise I won’t let you down this time.’
‘What? Leo, you can’t be serious...’ Could he? He sounded serious.
Clemmie’s voice again. ‘Well, I can tell you that this guy surely looks as if he means it. So if the lady in question has an answer and would like to phone in we’ll put her straight through. And, in the meantime, as it’s you, Leo, I’m going to
let you choose the next track.’
‘Thanks. It’s a song from Bobby and Aleesha’s new album.’
‘Ooh—love that. It’s a new direction for both of these two, but it’s been selling like hot cakes.’
‘Yep. They took a risk, but it worked out. Here’s Bobby and Aleesha.’
‘No, Leo...’ Tears started to roll down Alex’s face. How could he do this?
She knew exactly how he could do it. She’d asked him to take her number out of his phone, and she’d taken his out of hers because she wanted no part of Leo’s guilt. When he spoke to her, she wanted it to be real. And for Leo, saying it on the radio was about as real as it got.
She got to her feet, her heart thumping and her lungs straining to breathe. He loved her. He wouldn’t let her down. Leo had promised.
‘Okay. Take a breath. Count to ten.’ That didn’t work. She started to pace up and down, listening to the radio, wondering whether Leo would come back on.
It seemed not. The song had finished and there were more messages. From Darren to Claire. From Emma to Pete. Her head was spinning, and she still didn’t know what to do. Dared she trust Leo?
‘And we have Marion from Hampstead on the line. Marion, who’s your message for?’
‘My message is for Leo. I hope the lady says yes, but if she doesn’t then just pass my number on. I’ll say yes, Leo.’
‘No, you won’t!’ Alex yelled at the radio, picking it up and shaking it hard.
Then she knew. Alex grabbed her phone, staring at it.
She didn’t have his number. And, despite the fact she’d heard it about a million times, she couldn’t remember the number of the radio station. She waited impatiently for the next piece of music to finish, and then Clemmie obligingly read it out.
She dialled and waited. She knew that if she hung on the call would be answered, but it might take a while. Then she heard the operator on the other end.
‘Hello... Hello, it’s Alex Jackson...’
‘Alex. I have a question for you. What colour was that gorgeous dress of yours?’
‘My what?’ Suddenly she realised. They were making sure that it was her. ‘Green. It was green.’
‘Right. Hold on for just one moment. Don’t go away—I’m putting you through to Leo.’
A couple of clicks on the line, and then Leo’s voice. ‘Alex?’
She closed her eyes, wishing that she could see him. ‘Leo... Leo, are we on the radio?’
‘No. It’s just you and me.’ Alex jumped as her doorbell rang. ‘Is that your bell?’
‘Yes, forget it. They’ll go away. Leo...’
‘I don’t think so.’ The bell rang a second time.
‘Is that you?’
‘Yes. I was hoping you might let me in...’
Alex ran to the intercom, slamming her hand onto the door release.
He was coming up. She tugged at the long cardigan she was wearing, pulling it straight, and looked in the hall mirror, pulling her hair out of its ponytail and shaking her head so that it fell around her shoulders. Then her panic subsided. Leo loved her. He’d always taken her just the way she was.
There was a quiet rap on the door and she flung it open. Leo.
He looked amazing. Dinner jacket, bow tie, white shirt. Beautiful, beautiful blue eyes.
‘Leo...’ She hardly dared breathe. Didn’t dare touch him in case this was a dream and he’d suddenly evaporate.
‘May I come in?’
She stepped back from the door and he walked into the hallway. ‘You heard what I said on the radio? Can you believe me?’
‘Yes. You always tell the truth on the radio.’
‘I hoped you’d know that.’ He seemed suddenly nervous, that easy charm stripped away from him. ‘Will you hear me out, Alexandra?’
She swallowed hard. He’d unnecessarily and quite deliciously taken the time to use all four syllables of her name. ‘Always.’
‘I’ve done a lot of thinking, and a lot of talking. I’m letting go of the past and that’s allowed me to take hold of the present.’
‘Live for the moment?’
‘I’m living for this moment, right now.’
She could feel it, see it in his eyes. The way she had when they’d made love.
‘What you did...that hour on the radio, talking about Joel. It was amazing, Leo. It must have been so hard for you.’
‘It wasn’t as hard as losing you.’ He reached out, taking her hand. ‘I love you, and I know we can make this work. Will you take me back?’
Her heart thumped in her chest. But everything was suddenly crystal-clear. Alex cradled his hand between hers, raising it to her lips. ‘I should never have left you, Leo. I should have believed in you—you always believed in me, and you took me just the way I am...’
‘You did believe in me. You never could accept the way I used to be because you knew I could be a better man. That’s how I came to believe it too.’
‘I love you, Leo. I won’t ever let you go again, I promise.’
He let out a sigh, as if finally he could start breathing again. They both could. ‘Forever is a long time.’
‘We’re going to need it. We have a lot to do together.’
Suddenly he grinned. Leo fell to one knee in front of her, taking the red rose from his lapel and putting it into her hands. ‘I love you, Alex. And I won’t let you down.’
‘What are you doing? Leo...’ She felt suddenly breathless with joy.
‘You know what I’m doing.’
‘But... I’m such a mess. And you look so wonderful.’
‘You’re the most beautiful woman I’ve ever seen. I’m just overdressed.’ He tugged at his bow tie, leaving it to drape around his neck, and pulled open the top two buttons of his shirt. ‘Better?’
‘Yes. Much better.’ They could make this happen. Together they could do it.
‘Will you marry me, Alexandra?’
She knew the answer to that too. One word that promised everything. ‘Yes.’ She reached forward to pull him to his feet. ‘I love you so much, Leo, and I really want to marry you. Please, kiss me...’
But Leo had something else on his mind. Reaching into his pocket, he drew out a ring. A solitaire diamond, which flashed in the light. Alex gasped, covering her mouth with one hand.
‘Leo, that’s beautiful. It’s too much.’
He grinned. ‘I could take it back and get a smaller one, if that’s what you want.’
‘Don’t you dare.’
He laughed, slipping the ring on her finger, and then he did the one thing she’d been wanting him to do. The only thing that could make her completely happy. He got to his feet and kissed her.
EPILOGUE
Two years later...
LEO WAS NO longer able to exactly pin down the happiest day of his life. When Alex had told him she would marry him, he’d thought that had to be it. Until the day she did marry him. And then the night they’d spent at the secluded beach house on their honeymoon.
As he’d learned to build a life that wasn’t bound by guilt he had stumbled along the way, but Alex had always been there, stopping him from falling. Helping him find his feet, and love her a little more each time. And he’d been there for her too, encouraging her to take the step of working full-time for Together Our Way and to extend its services. The night she’d collected a Charity of the Year award, he’d thought his heart would burst with pride.
When she’d whispered in his ear that she was going to have his child, Leo had thought nothing could ever make him happier. Then came the moment that he held his newborn daughter in his arms, counting her fingers and toes, and promising little Chloe that he’d always be there for her.
There were the little things too. When Alex told him that sh
e loved him. When she reached for him in the night, and when he caught her up from their bed to watch the sun rise. When he looked into her eyes and saw joy.
It was a summer’s morning and Chloe, ten months old now, had slept in the car all the way down to the house in Surrey. He parked the car and Alex walked on ahead with Chloe, her dress flapping in the warm breeze, and stopped at the middle of the bridge to wait for him. As he walked towards them in the sunshine, Chloe stretched out her arms towards him.
‘Daddee...’
Alex caught her breath. ‘That’s right, sweetheart. That’s Daddy. Say it again.’ She hugged their daughter and Leo dropped the bags he was carrying, hurrying towards them.
‘Daddy.’
Alex laughed with delight and he caught the two of them in his arms, hugging them tight. ‘Have you been teaching her to say that while my back’s turned?’
‘No. It’s the first time. I’ve been trying to get her to say, Daddy, can I borrow the car keys? But I don’t think she’s up to that yet.’
‘I’m working on, Mummy, let’s go and make Daddy breakfast in bed. She nearly managed it the other day.’
‘I can think of much better things to do with you in bed than feed you breakfast.’
Leo laughed. ‘Are you being nice?’
Alex brushed a kiss against his lips. ‘I’m never nice.’
If he hadn’t known better, and that there would always be more, Leo would have said that this was the happiest day of his life.
* * * * *
If you enjoyed this story, check out these other great reads from Annie Claydon
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The Doctor's Diamond Proposal Page 17
