by Marie James
“Here?” I ask as my own emotions bubble out of my throat. The first thing I notice are the warm rivulets of tears as they stream down my face. I would’ve never guessed how happy I would be knowing water could flow out of me again.
She clears her throat and wipes at her eyes with her free hand. “You’ve been here for three days.”
I feel the bed shift as she sits beside me. I wince as the pull of the hospital johnny I’m wearing rubs against the sore skin on my hip.
“Sorry,” she says as she jumps up from the bed.
“I’m ok. My legs are sore.” I release her hand and begin to gently tug the blankets away. I almost break down at the sight of my legs. They’re covered in red blotches and some areas are open wounds; it looks like my skin was just rubbed off.
Lorali grips the blanket and delicately lays it back over my skin. “The doctor says it looks worse than it is. They treat it every day and he says you probably won’t even scar.”
Looking down at my hands I’ve just now noticed they are both wrapped in gauze. “My wrists?” How many injuries do I have?
“Your hands were tied. The rope cut into your skin pretty bad.” She settles back into the chair beside the bed.
I reach for and she clasps my hands again. “I’m sore all over,” I admit.
“Ian hired a physical therapist. She’s been coming twice a day to work out the muscles in your arms and legs.” She explains and I vaguely recall someone messing with my legs.
“Where’s Kaleb?”
Her smile is contagious. “Ian commandeered the room next door and brought beds in for people to rest. He’s next door probably grumbling about being forced out of here. Mom and Dad are over there as well. Who would you like to see first?”
“Kaleb,” I answer with a second of hesitation.
She leans in and kisses my cheek before exiting the room. I close my eyes as I wait for him to arrive.
A gentle hand sweeps down my cheek and I realize that I’d dozed off again. Opening my eyes this time was loads less painful.
Kaleb’s beautiful face and magnificent green eyes are mere inches from mine. He’s so close I can feel the soft gusts of his breath on my face. The tears begin to fall immediately.
“Baby,” I whisper. I sweep my eyes over every inch of the face I never thought I’d see again. His hair is much longer than the quarter of an inch I’m used to seeing on him and his face is covered in a full beard. “You need to shave,” I tell him hoarsely, at a loss for words on any other level.
He chuckles and continues to sweep his thumb over my cheek. His usually shamrock green eyes seem lighter and they shimmer just before a tear rolls down his cheek.
I reach up and touch the path the tear left behind. “I love you,” I whisper, knowing I can’t wait another second without telling him. Not when I’ve been given a second chance to do so.
“Fuck,” he pants against my mouth just before he kisses my lips ever so softly. “I love you, too.”
He rests his forehead against mine and we cry together, our tears mixing and running down my cheeks. “I thought I’d never see you again, Mariposa. I’ve missed you so much.”
“Shhh, baby. I’m here now.” I reassure him as best I can, but I’m feeling exactly the same way, with shame mixed in because I gave up on us and gave in to the darkness.
“Don’t ever leave me again,” he pleads.
“Never,” I whisper and kiss his soft lips.
Chapter 36
Kaleb
We get less than ten minutes together before the room is descended upon by the entire group of people that has been standing vigil over Josie’s bed. The room gets rather cramped once Ian, Lorali, and her parents all file in. I’m grateful to an extent that Garrett and Alexa ran home to grab showers and a nap.
The reunion is utter chaos with everyone talking at one time and I know Josie has to be overwhelmed but the smile has never left her face as Lorali and her parents talk to her with animation. They are trying to keep things cheery by telling her how her kids from school insisted on making Get Well Soon cards for her even though they are on summer break.
She seems content now, but I know more darkness is coming. The whimpers in her sleep since she’s been here are a clear indication of the pain and trauma she’s suffered. The hospital psychologist has been by and explained that we need to give her room and allow the story to come out at a speed that she sees fit. She promises to come back by to make arrangements for therapy once she’s awake.
I haven’t left her side and she hasn’t released my hand. Her mother has been nothing but nice to me but her father is a different story. He’s not been openly rude or disrespectful, but he’s very closed off to me. I can sense the disappointment he has in me. Any other time I’d say something about it, but the disgust he has towards me at not protecting his daughter is nothing compared with the anguish I’m suffering already.
I’m crouched down beside the bed with her tiny hand against my lips when the doctor comes in, obviously been made aware that’s she woken up. Everyone parts and allows the doctor to stand beside the bed. I rise but when I move to let her hand go she grips mine tighter. Apparently I’m not going anywhere.
“Hi, Josie. I’m Dr. Green. How are you feeling?” The doctor clasps his hands together in front of him and waits for her answer.
“Tired. Sore.” She clears her throat. “Hoping you’ll take this tube out of me.” She raises her eyes to him.
“I’ll have the nurse remove it promptly, but once you begin to eat again you have to take things slow. Your diet will be rather bland for a few days until your body can get used to taking solid foods again.”
She nods her agreement.
“I’m wanting to go over everything with you. Would you like me to do that alone?” He watches her face for any indication that she wants us to leave.
She shakes her head. “I want them here,” she answers.
He tilts his head and it suddenly makes me wonder exactly what he needs to discuss that he would want us to leave for. The idea that she had been hurt worse than I’m aware of hits me like a ton of bricks. I sway on my feet but the firm grip Josie has on my hand grounds me.
“Ok.” He smiles and sits gingerly on the far end of the bed.
I crouch again beside the head of her bed so I’m not looming over him and everyone else is behind him waiting to hear what the doctor has to say.
“We ran a full blood panel on you when you arrived. Anemia is common in people who have been malnourished and suffer from dehydration. You were mildly anemic but we’re giving you iron through your IV so it’s gotten better. We’ll continue to monitor it. We did find traces of methamphetamines in your system.” He pauses allowing her to explain if she can.
They drugged her? I’m glad they’re dead!
“They were smoking drugs almost the entire time I was there.” She explains. “They hit me in the head in the parking lot and I woke up in the closet. I don’t know if they gave me any though.”
“It was only trace levels so they probably got in your system from breathing.” He nods his head towards the head of the bed directing her line of sight. “We’ve had you on a heart monitor because heart issues are also common with malnutrition, but it seems to be fine so we’ll pull that when we remove the NG tube.”
He pauses and glances towards me. Fuck, here comes whatever news he didn’t want to share to the masses.
“The trace amounts of methamphetamines are of concern for the fetus, but we’ve been…” a collect gasp from around the room has the doctor stopping mid-sentence.
“Fe…fetus?” Josie stammers, her hand releasing mine.
“Yes, Josie. You’re pregnant.” We all stare at him in shock. “From the hCg levels in your blood I’d say about five weeks along.”
Five weeks? How the fuck is that even possible. I look at Josie in confusion; the hurt has to be obvious on my face.
“Kaleb I swear I didn’t do this on purpose.” I watch as she turns
her head back to the doctor. “I’m on the shot, it’s not possible.”
“Depo has a six percent failure rate, Josie. It happens more than you’d think.”
“Josie?” I say to get her attention and I can’t help but shake my head, trying to get it to understand how this happened. How could she have lied to me? She said she’d not been with anyone in years. Only that one time. “Five weeks,” I say to her.
The doctor clears his throat and I turn my gaze to him because I can’t bear to look at Josie. I feel betrayed. Lied to.
“Yes five weeks. This means she would have conceived about three weeks or so ago.” My eyes go wide. I have no clue how she can be five weeks along, having conceived three weeks ago, but the news floors me. “You seem very concerned Detective Perez.” He turns his head back to Josie. “Josie, were you sexually assaulted during captivity.”
I watch as she adamantly shakes her head no and looks at me. I think she may be in shock but I can’t hide the huge grin that creeps up on my face. I reach for her hand; she’s trembling. I lean my face down to hers just as a tear rolls down her cheek.
I register the sound of the door slamming closed and then it opens and closes softly again after a few moments.
A throat clearing pulls my attention away from Josie and we both look up to see the room has cleared and only the doctor remains. The slamming door more than likely from her dad.
“We will continue to monitor the progress of the fetus through blood draws and ultrasounds until we are certain you guys are in the clear.” He nods and walks out of the room.
I feel Josie squeeze my hand. I look back at her. She’s biting her bottom lip to keep from sobbing. I reach up and pull it free.
“I swear I didn’t get pregnant on purpose. I don’t want you to feel trapped.” She takes a deep shaky breath. “You can be involved as much or as little as you want.”
How could she ever think I’d leave her or a baby for that matter? “Marry me.” It’s not a question but more of a soft demand.
Her breath hisses as she tries to take a huge gulp of air at one time.
“Because I’m pregnant?” The tears are now spilling over her eyes and down her cheeks constantly.
“No, Mariposa, because I love you.” I lean in and take her face in my hands.
She whimpers as she whispers, “yes” against my lips.
“A baby,” she says softly.
“A baby,” I repeat against her trembling lips.
“I think my dad is pissed,” she says.
I nod my head and chuckle. “There’s a good chance, but he’s so happy you’re home and safe that he’ll get over it quickly. I’m sure.”
“You must have super sperm to beat the depo shot,” she’s laughing and her mood has made a complete turnaround.
”What do you expect? I am Puerto Rican after all!” This has to be the happiest day of my life. Now to tell my Catholic mother.
Chapter 37
Josie
“Why do you suddenly have a look of trepidation on your face?” It would be comical if he wasn’t so serious. Is he doubting our future already? It’s surely not a good sign if he is.
“I just realized I have to tell my mother that you’re pregnant.” He shudders. “I may lead with the engagement first to soften the blow.” He’s nodding his head like he just came up with the best idea ever.
“She going to hate me,” I whisper.
“She loves you already. Thinks you’re the most beautiful woman she’s ever seen.” He’s beaming at me.
“She’s been here?” How terrible is it the first time my fiancé’s mother sees me is in a hospital bed with meth in my system. I cringe at the thought.
“Every day. She prays over you. She can’t wait to talk to you.” I can tell by the way his face lights up that he treasures his mother which is a very important foundation when starting a family.
“Yeah, she may change her mind after you give her the ‘good news.’” I fall deeper in love with him when he doesn’t nod his head at my sarcasm.
“It may come as a shock, but she knows we would get married and start a family soon anyway.” I glare at him and he shrugs his shoulders. “There’s no denying it when I can’t take my eyes away from you.”
A knock at the door startles us both. A middle aged nurse with a warm smile dressed in purple scrubs sticks her head in the door and smiles.
Kaleb beams. “Anne, please come in. I want you to meet my fiancé.”
Her smile widens. “Congrats you guys!” She winks. “I hear even more congrats are in order!”
He places a gentle palm on my lower belly. “We’re pretty shocked but ecstatic!” He looks back at me for reassurance and I can’t help but smile and nod my head.
“Well, Dr. Green sent me in here to remove a few things.” Her eyes dart Kaleb. “She may not want you in here for some of this.”
I’m hoping she means she’ll also remove the catheter so I stop him before he can protest. “I’ll be fine, baby.”
“You sure,” he asks and I know he doesn’t want to leave my side no more than I want him gone, but somethings should be left unseen by their lovers.
I nod and he leans in and kisses my head. “Ok, Mariposa. I’m going to go give my mom the good news. She told me to let her know the minute you woke up, but I don’t want to tell her everything over the phone.” He kisses me gently on the lips. “I’ll be back shortly. Have Lorali or Ian call me if you need me before I get back.” He’s stalling and can’t seem to pull away.
I brush my lips against his and the sound of the table tray moving reminds me we aren’t alone in the room. “I love you, Kaleb.”
“I love you, too.” He groans as he pulls away and doesn’t release my hand until the reach of our combined arms break.
I watch him with appreciation as he walks towards the door. “Kaleb.” He stops in his tracks and looks back at me. “Shave the beard, baby. You look homeless.” I close my eyes and listen to his laugh as he leaves Anne and me alone in the room.
“That man has it bad,” she says with a small laugh.
“Well, that makes two of us.” My hands rest instinctively on my stomach.
“With the way everyone filed out here suddenly, I take it the pregnancy news was a shock?” I watch her as she readies some folded blue towels and iodine swabs on a sterile cloth on the small bed side table.
“The biggest,” I answer honestly.
“Sometimes the biggest blessings are unplanned.” I let her words hang in the air and know without a doubt that she’s absolutely correct.
Kaleb and I are getting married and having a baby, all of this coming after spending more than two weeks tied up in a closet and starved by meth heads; and to think three weeks ago I was worried about closet space.
“Ok let’s get started. I’m going to remove the catheter and NG tube and I’ll also pull the leads for the heart monitor. The little circle patches are a little more difficult to get off, so I’ll show that hunky cop of yours how to do it with alcohol swabs and you guys can work on getting them free.” She uses the buttons on the bed rail to lower my top half.
I use my arm to cover my eyes as she talks me through what she has to do to remove the catheter, partly from embarrassment but in large part because I’m terrified it’s going to hurt. Before I even know it she’s covering my legs back up.
“You may have some very mild incontinence for a few days but it will go away eventually.” She laughs. “Well, until that baby starts jumping on your bladder and then it may come back with a vengeance.”
I smile at her, internally excited about my baby jumping on my bladder.
She sits my bed back up and after a small cough, and the grossest feeling ever, the disgusting feeding tube is gone. Seconds later all the wires for the heart monitor are gone and Anne is helping me walk to the restroom. She praises my ability to get there easily after what I’ve been through; giving credit to the physical therapist that Ian has apparently paid top dollar for.<
br />
Once I’m settled back in bed, Anne pulls the blankets up and wishes me well. Exhausted from all of the activity I lean my head back into the soft pillow, taking a moment to appreciate that the sheets I’m lying on are incredibly soft for hospital sheets. Sleep finds me within seconds it seems.
***
I wake to the graze of a kiss on my cheek.
“Kaleb,” I whisper with a smile and I open my eyes, slightly startled to see a beautiful face surrounded by slightly untamed red curls. “Alexa!”
She leans in again and gives me a light squeezing hug.
“How are you feeling?” She asked delicately.
“Better,” I answer honestly.
Movement across the room grabs my attention and I see Lorali slip into the room.
“I want to go home,” I tell them.
Alexa nods her head with a resigned look on her face. “I understand. Believe me I do.”
“The doctor seems to think you may only need to be here a day or so more. He’s surprised at how well you’ve bounced back after such,” she clears her throat, obviously upset, “after such neglect,” she finishes.
“A few more days won’t be so bad I guess.” I smile when I hear Alexa huff. Her stay in the hospital lasted for what seemed like forever; getting shot apparently included more time than being starved for a few weeks.
“I’m having a baby,” I whisper to Alexa.
She bites her lip, trying to hide a grin. It makes me think she’s not sure how I’m taking the news. “I heard,” she says eventually.
“I’m excited,” I say honestly.
She immediately releases her lip and a huge grin takes up nearly her entire face.
“He asked me to marry him,” I say softly and cut my eyes to Lorali and relax when I see the same big grin on her face.
“What did you say,” she asks nearly squealing.
“Seriously?” I ask indignantly. “You’ve seen the man! I’d be an idiot to turn him down!”
We all laugh and they both give my congratulatory hugs.
“We can have a double wedding!” Lorali exclaims like she just came up with the best idea on the face of the earth.
