by Joanne Rock
Either way, Rachel would take it. Kiersten was happy. Emma had told her twice tonight how perfectly the revamped bridesmaid gown fit. Even Katie Garrett seemed ready to put the past behind her, offering Rachel a stilted compliment on her dress.
Needing to say something to break the spell at work between her and Gavin, Rachel remembered some of the other things that had happened at the party. Something she wanted to share.
“I spoke to the mayor,” she began, ducking under Gavin’s arm as he spun her through a turn.
His green eyes contained a warmth that made her want to move closer to him. “He told me you had some good suggestions for the ski event.”
His hand shifted along her back, the warmth of his fingers brushing bare skin through the decorative cut-outs in the fine lace jacket she wore.
“I did.” She couldn’t help a smile at the memory of bombarding Scott Malek with a list of things she thought would help the town right itself. He hadn’t been as resistant as she’d feared, inviting her to a future meeting. “But that’s not all. I warned him about my mother’s future donation, and he agreed not to accept the money.”
“Congratulations.” His gaze never left hers, making her feel like the only woman in the room. “You’ve accomplished a lot this week.”
“I’m excited to attend Kiersten and Luke’s wedding,” she admitted. “I know I still have a long way to go with Luke’s family, but at least they didn’t bar me at the door tonight.” She glanced over to the table full of the groom’s closest relations.
Luke’s mother, in particular, seemed to track Rachel’s movements everywhere she went tonight. The extra attention made her uneasy. She had won allies this week for sure. But trust was going to be difficult for a lot of people who’d felt abandoned by Chris Chambers and deceived by his vision for Yuletide. She didn’t want to think about any of that tonight though.
“The Harrises still wield a lot of influence around here,” Gavin admitted as the song came to an end. “But now that Luke has welcomed you back, I think everyone else will too.”
She hoped so, for her mother’s sake more than her own. Rachel hated to think about all the years of saving and worrying that had gone into her mom’s effort to redeem them in the town’s eyes over the last eight years. At least now she could spend her money on something fun for herself.
The music changed tempo again but Gavin didn’t move off the dance floor. They stood together, arms still twined lightly around one another, the glow of a thousand tiny icicle lights raining down on them.
“People are starting to leave the party,” she whispered up at him, hypnotized by the flecks of gold in his green eyes. “I should probably get going.”
Still, she couldn’t will her feet to move. She’d driven separately since Gavin had attended the wedding rehearsal with the rest of the bridal party first. They were all spending the night at the Hearthside Inn, where the wedding would take place tomorrow afternoon.
After that, Gavin would be on a plane to Austria. The idea of being separated from him hit her like a physical hurt.
“I don’t want tonight to end.” His words were her thoughts. For a moment, she wondered if she’d said them aloud.
She swayed on her feet. Stay or go?
Then a pair of children raced past them, a boy and a girl, darting toward the table full of after-party favors to pocket bags of candy.
“Will you walk me to my car?” Her suddenly dry throat scratched over the words, but with an effort, she stepped back. Pointed her feet toward the door.
She was grateful when he moved with her.
“I hope you’ll let me drive you home.” Gavin only paused long enough to sign their names in the register as they walked toward the closest exit. He seemed as eager as her to avoid talking to anyone else before leaving.
She wanted to savor the feel of his hand holding hers. His shoulder strong and square if she decided to tip her forehead to rest there for a moment.
“I don’t want you to make the trip all the way to Yuletide and back when I have a car in the garage downstairs.” She paused by the coat check table while Gavin retrieved her cape.
Her heartbeat quickened as the parting became more real. More final.
Panic made her belly cramp. What was she thinking chasing him away when, more than anything, she wanted to be with him tonight?
“Rachel.” He whispered her name into her hair, his temple resting on her head for a moment. “I can’t let you go yet.”
She closed her eyes, feeling the same desperate need. The same unwillingness to say goodnight. Heat flared like an oil lamp someone turned to the highest setting, a sudden bright flash of warmth. She recalled the most memorable kisses of her entire life had been with this man. How could she not take just one more?
“Another kiss might make it easier to say goodbye.” She wasn’t the sort of woman to say flirtatious things she didn’t mean. She wanted to feel that connection to him one more time.
Gavin’s hand closed around her shoulder, gripping her tight as he seemed to gather his own composure. “Or a kiss could make it impossible to walk away.”
Rachel appreciated that he would look out for her. That he cared how she felt. Around them, the bride and groom’s relatives streamed passed them to find their way home while Gavin and Rachel stood unnoticed in a shadowed nook where a phone bank used to be.
“It’s impossible to walk away now,” she pointed out reasonably, even though her breath felt thin and insubstantial, not nearly rich enough to sustain the heady swell of feelings inside her. She hadn’t even kissed him yet, and her knees went wobbly from just the idea of it. “So we can’t be any worse off for trying.”
His jaw flexed, the angles of his face stern. He was exercising restraint, she realized with more than a little feminine satisfaction. And from the dark scowl of worry settling over his brow, it wasn’t easy for him.
“We could be much worse off,” he warned her, tension radiating from him.
She knew because she’d planted her hands on his chest at some point to make her appeal. She smoothed one palm down the front of the silvery-gray tie, the hard planes of muscle endlessly intriguing. When she glanced up into his eyes again, the easygoing, charming snowboarder was gone, replaced with a man of starker emotions.
And a need even more intense than her own.
He’d been abandoned by too many people, she realized, remembering his words that night on the playground. I don’t want my heart trounced either, he’d told her. He didn’t take risks in relationships after the way his parents had checked out on him. Her own father’s disappearance had hurt him too, since he’d looked up to Chris Chambers like a father.
Then, she’d left town as well and hadn’t looked back.
Gavin didn’t need to explain the scars those hurts left. She understood the feeling and, more importantly, she was beginning to understand him. She’d started falling for him a long time ago and had stopped herself as a protective measure. But tonight, she didn’t want to protect herself anymore.
She wanted to be there for him. For Gavin.
She would take the risk with her heart for this man because she loved him. It occurred to her now that she hadn’t come to Yuletide to make peace with Luke—or the town—at all. Her need to return had been tied to this man from the start.
“I know you’re leaving after the wedding.” She gripped his lapels lightly while inside the ballroom the violinist played the final notes of a last song to end the night, stretching out the refrain in a bittersweet ending. “But that doesn’t change anything for me. I want to be with you tonight, Gavin.”
Not giving him time to think about an answer, a denial, or a reasoned argument, Rachel found her courage. Arching up on her toes, she pressed her lips to his.
*
The need to be with her roared in Gavin’s ears. Low and insistent at first, like the rumble of an oncoming avalanche. And then, as her soft lips made a sweet, unspoken promise to his, the rumble turned to a ground
-shifting, seismic quake.
He crushed her to him, caught up in the moment and the delicate gift of her bare arms wrapping around his neck, her body pressed thoroughly to his. Chivalrous notions took flame, burned away by the words that had torched over him.
I want to be with you.
He could still hear the echo of a statement that turned his world upside down faster than any aerial jump. And they hadn’t even left the shadowy nook off the hotel lobby.
“Come on.” He broke away from her abruptly, before he lost that ability. Hanging on to sanity by a thread, he shoved open a door to a fire stairwell, sucking in deep breaths of cooler air as he drew her upward with him. “We can talk upstairs.”
He palmed the keycard for his room and toed open the door to the third floor, holding it wide for her. Rachel hurried past him, her blue skirt swishing as she moved, everything about her a sweet temptation. He matched her step, guiding her toward his suite, his brain struggling to work past the attraction. To think his way through it. She couldn’t possibly mean what he thought she meant.
Except, as he turned the handle to admit them to the living area decorated in Adirondack furnishings and green plaid accents, Rachel stepped inside with a determined sense of purpose.
It was apparent in the set of her shoulders as she shrugged out of her cape and the lace jacket she’d worn over her dress. More apparent in the way she plucked a pin from her hair and sent dark waves cascading over her shoulders.
Speechless, Gavin closed the distance between them, any reason why he should refuse drying up like dust on his tongue. Steadying her—or maybe himself—by holding her upper arms, he drew her closer. He took his time falling captive to her heated blue gaze tracking his every movement. Finally, he cupped her chin and tilted her head, perfecting the angle for a taste.
Everything about her was exquisite, from the peppermint glide of her tongue along his to the fresh apple fragrance of her hair. Little satin flowers slid out of the dark mass as he raked his fingers through it, letting the silky strands glide over his hands.
The back of her neck was so soft. The skin above the zipper to her dress even softer. His hands skimmed all over her, learning the ways she liked to be touched by the way her breath caught on a sigh or her teeth captured her lip.
He’d burned to touch her for days, but he’d been prepared to get on that plane tomorrow without giving himself the satisfaction. Knowing he might not be able to keep his promise to his team with her siren’s voice in his ear, her laughter—her happiness—a sound he could grow addicted to.
She slid off his tie, her fingers stealthily unfastening buttons, gliding over bare skin. Pressing a kiss to the center of his chest, she folded his shirt back and off his shoulders, taking the tie with it.
He walked her backward through the suite, grateful he’d left the living room lights on so he could see where he was going…toward the separate bedroom with a king-sized bed that housekeeping had helpfully turned down for the night. He swiped aside the chocolates on the pillow before she tumbled onto the mattress with him in a tangle of limbs and hair, her soft giggle floating over him.
Rolling her to her side, he kissed away the straps of her dress, letting them slip off each shoulder with a gentle nudge. She helped him at first, wriggling and arching to free herself of the rest of the dress, but when he insisted on taking his time, she lay back and watched, her hair spilling over the ivory sheets.
He couldn’t get enough of her taste, her scent. By the time he had their clothes off, they were both breathless. Ready. He could see her well enough in the light from the outer room through the half-open door, her cheeks flushed pink. A surge of protectiveness slammed him, the need to keep her safe and please her overriding his own pleasure.
Overriding everything. Shoving off the bed, he stalked into the bathroom and found a condom in his shaving kit, a prank gift from the younger guys on the snowboard cross team who thought nothing of one-night encounters. For Gavin, it had to mean more.
No question, with Rachel, it meant everything.
The knowledge socked him square in the chest as he returned to the bedroom to find her tucked in the sheets, hugging the pillow beside her. He didn’t know what it meant. But he hadn’t wanted this night to end. Had been ready to trade anything for a chance to explore the attraction.
And now? She was giving him the most precious gift he could have imagined.
“Are you sure about this?” He needed her to be one hundred percent certain.
“I’ve never been more sure about anything.” Relinquishing the pillow, she held a hand out to him.
Returning to her open arms, he touched her all the ways he’d been dreaming about, spinning out the pleasure until her breathless pleas in his ear threatened sensual retaliation unless he followed her sweetly explicit directives. Gavin caved to her every wish, burying himself deep inside her, moving, kissing her beautiful face until they both cried out with release.
Light-headed from the rush, he held her for long moments afterward, caressing her shoulder, waiting for his heart rate to slow. His breathing to return to normal. He hoped he’d be able to make some sense of what had just happened. For now, he kissed her hair, inhaling the scent of her shampoo and wishing he could have her with him always.
Always?
He’d never felt as close to another woman. Ever.
And as sense slowly returned, he knew what they’d shared wasn’t about one night. He had feelings for her before this and now, a new tenderness for her threatened to pull him into uncharted terrain. Normally, he was so careful with relationships, keeping things light and easy.
With Rachel, that hadn’t been possible and that rocked him. He was grateful for the quiet, needing a moment to figure out his next move as she tucked closer to his side under the sheets. He had to get on a plane tomorrow. He’d promised his coach. He was committed to the team.
What had he been thinking to forget about all of that and indulge himself with a woman he truly cared about? A woman he…
His gut clenched hard as he struggled to name the feeling, knowing damn well what it was but unwilling to admit it, even to himself. Somehow, labeling it gave the feeling more power, especially when he had no idea what Rachel wanted from him. She was a free spirit and a strong woman. She’d been able to walk away from him eight years ago without a glance back, just like everyone else he’d let get close. What made him think he could trust her now to do anything different?
Even now, his legs buzzed with the need to get up. To race down a mountain and clear his head while the cooling snow spray showered his face. He couldn’t snowboard in the dark though. He’d have to wait until daylight, but then—wedding or no wedding—he knew the mountain was the only place where he’d find his answers. The only spot where he could think.
So until dawn, he would lie right here, beside this incredible woman he cared about far too much, and hope he hadn’t already taken the biggest fall of his life.
Chapter Eleven
Sunshine stole through the blinds in Gavin’s hotel suite the next morning, awakening Rachel with a spill of warm light on her face. Not ready to open her eyes, she clung to the last moments of half-sleep, her body languorous and sated. The sheets tangled around her legs and the pillowcase smelled vaguely of Gavin’s aftershave.
She buried her nose deeper into the down, breathing in the scent of him. A smile pulled at her lips as she remembered their night together. She’d turned into him once—long after midnight—and his arms had wrapped around her automatically, reeling her near. Today, they would attend a wedding together, the most romantic sort of date imaginable.
Would it bring them closer? Or would the sudden shift in dynamic between them add an element of romantic pressure and expectation? Rachel cranked open her eyes at the worrisome thought. She would be fine. But would Gavin?
Turning to his side of the bed, she reached an arm out to him.
Or…to the spot he’d vacated.
“Gavin?” Sitting
upright, she took the sheets with her.
His rumpled pillow assured her she hadn’t dreamed what happened the night before. But where was he? She didn’t hear him stirring in the living area or bathroom.
Wrapping the bed linens around her, toga style, she wondered if he went out to get coffee. Barefoot, she padded along the cool wood floors, trying to hopscotch from one area rug to another. She didn’t see him out on the balcony that overlooked the mountain. Her heart sank, even knowing that he could be downstairs in search of the continental breakfast.
She’d envisioned waking up together and getting ready for the wedding. Should she simply drive herself home like she’d planned last night and meet him back here later? Jittery nerves rushed over her skin as she headed toward the bathroom. There, trapped between the mirror and the medicine cabinet behind it, she spotted a sheet of hotel stationery—pinned where she was sure to see it.
Levering open the mirror to free the paper, she read the handwritten message:
Thought I’d better take a few runs on the mountain before I need to be at the church. My flight is at 8 p.m., so this will be my last chance to work on things before the team race. Sorry not to be here when you wake up, but I’ll see you soon.
Gavin
Disappointment stung. No mention of their night together or what it meant. No hint that anything had changed between them. He’d been careful to mention his flight out, however. A sure sign his mind was on the upcoming separation as opposed to…what?
What had she expected to change by taking a leap and making her feelings for him so obvious? She’d been determined to show him that she cared about him. That she was ready for more.
