by KyAnn Waters
Uncurling her legs, she sat straight. Fury radiated off him in waves and his eyes sent shards of fear through her. “Train? We’re just friends.”
“More than that, I think. I just had a conversation with him.” He went to the bar and poured a drink. “He fancies himself in love with you.” He slammed the drink. “Did you fuck him?”
“No!” She covered her mouth with her hand and shook her head. “How could you think that? I swear, we had one kiss. One kiss,” she cried. “And I’m not sure it was a kiss after today.”
TJ’s drink stilled halfway to his mouth. “Explain.”
“He gave me a simple peck on the lips.” As much as she wanted to plead her innocence, a bigger need to lash out at TJ surged over her. “Not that I owe you any explanation, but I’ve never done anything like we did today.” Her voice grew louder. “Ever.”
TJ’s shoulders relaxed.
“Damn you.” She spun away. “You can’t do this to me.”
“I’m sorry.” He crossed to her, rested his hands on her shoulders, and turned her to face him. “Forgive me. I can’t help that I’m jealous over your relationship with him.”
“My relationship with Joseph has nothing to do with us. I’m different with you.” She stood on her tiptoes and gently brushed his lips with hers. So much for abstaining from intimate contact. She hadn’t been away from him more than a few minutes and already she felt a mysterious ache spreading through her breasts and sinking into her sex.
TJ wrapped his arms around her and pulled her close. Then he kissed the top of her head. “I want you to have Sugar.”
She pulled away and smiled. “Really?”
“She’ll remind you of what happened today.”
Allison’s cheeks warmed. “I won’t need a horse to remember.”
“I told you her name was Sugar, because she is sweet tempered and easy to ride. I’m beginning to think of you the same way.”
Allison’s mouth dropped open. “As in easy to ride.” She shoved hard against his chest. “I’m not a mare…or a whore. How dare you? Why do I care what you think?” How dare he insinuate what happened between them equated to nothing more than animal attraction.
“Easy now,” he laughed, taking her by the shoulders. “I didn’t mean it the way it sounded.” He laughed. “Okay, I did. But I meant it in a good way.”
She wiggled, attempting to break free from his grip.
“I want you to know how good you felt underneath me,” he whispered. She thought he might kiss her again so she lifted her knee, impacting his thigh and jerked free from his embrace.
“I’ll take the horse as a way to remember why all you’ll ever have of me is the memory of today. Go to hell TJ, I don’t want anything to do with you.”
* * *
Allison sat in the dark for a long time. She couldn’t stop seeing the look of devastation on Joseph’s face when he left. She had hurt the only friend she had at the ranch for an afternoon tryst that meant nothing to TJ. He affected her in ways she never knew possible, but he professed no real feelings. It seemed his only concern was she not be with someone else. Blaming anyone, save herself was pointless. TJ had declared his intentions from the beginning. He’d only ever have one wife, and she was gone.
Allison had tempted him at every opportunity. Ever since the night he spent with Sandy, she had wanted him for herself. “I am a whore,” she told herself. She was willing to give him what he wanted without asking anything in return. She had left her life in Boston because she couldn’t do with Henry what she longed for with TJ.
Chapter Eight
Two weeks passed since the day of the ride and Allison had been avoiding TJ. She’d taken to waking before dawn to sneak into the stable to feed Sugar a carrot or an apple. Too many men wandered the grounds in the evening. She worried about seeing Joseph. She didn’t know what to say to him.
When she returned from the stable, she packed TJ a lunch for a long ride into Copper City. He’d be well on his way before sun up. He’d surely make time to see Sandy. She bristled as she shoved a couple of apples into a bag.
“You’re quiet,” TJ said.
Allison answered him with a shrug.
“I’ll be a couple of days.”
She gave him a snort. So he needed a few days to work out his frustrations. Good.
“We’re getting fireworks for the Fourth.”
“But it hasn’t rained,” she said concerned.
“I know. Been a rough year, I don’t want to disappoint Sissy. We’ll be extra careful.” He dropped a bag carrying his clothes on the floor next to the kitchen table.
“Here’s your canteen.” She turned and thrust it into his hands when he came up behind her.
“Do you have a cup of coffee for me before I head out?” He raised an eyebrow.
Why did he have to be charming? She preferred the bristly TJ.
“Allison? Coffee?”
“Sure. I’ll make your breakfast, too.” She went to the kitchen door. The room warmed with heat from the stove. Opening the door let in cool dry air. By mid-morning the house would roast if she didn’t leave the windows open throughout the night.
Allison set a frying pan on the stove. She made bacon and eggs while TJ drank coffee and made another list. He’d already gotten her list of needs for the house.
“I have letters for Sandy and Marion.”
TJ didn’t look up from the paper. “I’ll deliver them. Put them in my bag. It’s right here.” He nudged the bag with his foot.
Allison kept her eyes on the stove. “Thank you.” She set the food on the table and rushed from the room. “I’ll get the letters.”
Once in her bedroom, she dried her eyes and took a couple of deep cleansing breaths. “Why do I let him do this to me?” If he still desired Sandy, it was his business. The very private TJ made it clear she had no right to question any part of his life.
When she returned to the kitchen, TJ had finished his breakfast. His dish sat on the counter in the empty room. She rushed out the back door after him. “Don’t leave without my letters,” she said when she found him putting his things in the wagon.
“I wasn’t leaving. Finish loading,” he said to Charlie. “Come on.” He took Allison by the elbow and escorted her back into the house. Once the door securely latched behind them, he swung her around almost tripping her. He gently backed her against the wall. “Will you miss me?”
“Of course not. I have more than enough work to keep me busy. I doubt I will think of you at all.”
“I will think about you constantly.”
“I’m sure you know how to alleviate that.” She rolled her eyes.
“I do.” Pressing his lips to hers, he plunged his tongue deep into her mouth. His hand rested dangerously close to her breast.
Her head fell back against the wall when TJ moved his lips to trail along the side of her neck. “Tell me you’ll miss me.” His rough voice sent flutters quivering deep inside her.
“Not one minute. I hate you, remember.” Instinctively, she maneuvered her legs to fit the strain of his cock between her thighs. He growled and she smiled.
“Charlie will get suspicious it I take too long.” He rested his forehead against hers. It was an intimate embrace. “Stay close to the house.” He kissed her quickly and took his hat off the table before walking out the door.
Two can play your game Mr. Bester. She knew he wanted her close to the house because of Joseph, just as she tried to show him what he wouldn’t be getting from Sandy.
TJ sat on the buckboard about to drive off when Allison came out of the house. She waved and walked past him toward the stable.
“I thought you were going to stay close to the house,” TJ hollered after her.
“I’m sharing breakfast with Sugar.” She held up the apple and disappeared into the darkness.
* * *
“You’ve been avoiding me.”
Allison dropped the shirt she was hanging on the line to dry in the summer sun.
She held her hand above her eyes and squinted to see Joseph reaching up to secure the clothes. “Yes, I have, but not for the reasons you’re thinking.”
He stuffed his hands into his pockets. “I’m not the only one thinking there’s something going on between you and the boss.”
Allison left the laundry in the basket and walked around to the front porch. She sat on the steps. Joseph sat beside her. “Don’t ask me anything if you don’t want the truth.” She folded her hands in her lap.
“I don’t want to talk about TJ.” He took off his hat and then rolled a cigarette. “You didn’t seem to mind when I kissed you.”
Allison thought about the kiss they shared. It only served to remind her of TJ.
He waited for her to say something. “He won’t treat you right.” Joseph stood and put on his hat. “You’ll live in Janelle’s shadow if you try to make a life with him. Don’t get me wrong, I love TJ, but he’s the one who swore he’d never love another woman. He’ll let you believe you’re special to him. I’ve known TJ a long time. Janelle was the only woman I ever saw him remain faithful to.” He turned and left her sitting on the porch.
Her legs shook when she stood. She waited a moment for her trembling heart to slow and then went back to the laundry.
Joseph’s words tumbled around in her mind. The rational side of her realized she had no claim on TJ, but her heart hurt nonetheless. Stolen kisses were not promises of potential feelings to come later. TJ had gone to Sandy because she hadn’t been able to satisfy his needs. Joseph knew TJ better than she did. If he was right, she’d never have TJ’s love the way he was slowly claiming hers.
Later, after Allison put the children to bed, she had the rare opportunity to look around TJ’s room without fear of being caught. She entered the room as she had countless times. Any time before was to change the sheets and collect dirty clothes. She never dared look at his belongings or peer into his private desk. She carried a lantern into the room and set it on the bureau. The open window caught her attention. She blew out the flame and let the light of the moon fill the room. The curtains gently swayed in the night breeze.
A thin summer blanket covered the bed. The fabric felt soft as she ran her hand along the edge. She crawled onto the bed and pulled his pillow to her nose. It smelled of wood and flannel just like TJ. She only planned to close her eyes for a few minutes, but soon she slept.
The loud crack of thunder woke her a few hours later. The gentle breeze of earlier was now a full torrent of wind. She hurried to close the window. After lighting the lantern, she went to the children’s room and checked on them. Sissy lay awake and afraid. Michael still slept.
“Mama, where’s Papa?” Her eyes darted wildly around the room. “I’m scared.” Her thin arms wrapped around Allison as Allison picked her up.
“You can sleep in his bed tonight.” She carried Sissy to TJ’s room and deposited her in the spot she had just vacated. “I’m going to get your brother. I’ll be right back.”
A moment later, she placed Michael next to Sissy. “Sis, watch your brother. I’m going to close the windows downstairs.”
Allison carried the lantern from window to window. Some she closed partway, the others, she closed and latched. The wind howled through the house. She screamed as lightning struck overhead. The thunder rumbled loud. The windows shuddered as the booming intensified. She covered her ears. Then Michael cried out from TJ’s room. She rushed to the stairs as someone pounded on the front door.
“Allison, open up!” Train hollered from outside.
Allison pulled open the door and rushed into his arms. “I’m scared.”
“Get the kids and come with me.” He pushed her toward the stairs. His frantic tone sent shards of panic through her.
“What’s wrong?” She climbed the stairs two at a time with Train right on her heels. She rushed into TJ’s room to the children.
“Fire. We have to hurry.” He grabbed Sissy and Allison held Michael tightly to her chest. “It’s coming this way, fast. I want everyone in the shack.” He talked as they carried the children down the stairs. “I already sent a rider after TJ.” He looked at Allison. “He usually stays at the same place.” He let the implication hang in the air.
As they ran from the house, Allison stopped halfway across the yard and faced the wind. On the rise above them an eerie red glow radiated into the sky. Thick black smoke made it difficult to breath. Michael started to cough.
“Come on,” Train yelled. He grabbed her elbow.
Once they were in the Shack, Allison realized how many people from the ranch she hadn’t met. The room filled quickly with crying children and hysterical mothers. Train jumped onto a table and called everyone to attention.
“As long as the fire stays over the rise you’ll be safe here. We need to focus on containing the fire so stay here. No one leaves without checking with Allison. If you must leave for some reason, give a detailed account of where you’ll be and when you’ll be back. If you don’t know who she is yet, she’s right here in the blue dress.” He smiled and gave her a wink. “Most of us have been through fires before.”
“Not this close to home,” someone from the back yelled.
“I know.” Train hollered back. “Tell your wife good night and let’s go.”
The first priority was to get the cattle on the other side of the lake. A dozen men saddled up and took off to drive the herds to safety. The rest of the men filled their canteens and grabbed shovels. The best defense was to draw a line and keep the fire from crossing it.
The women and children gathered around Allison. She wished Joseph had allocated someone else to the position, but she understood why he did it. She was on the payroll. These women just wanted to know their husbands would be back safely.
“I only know as much as you,” she said to them. “Joseph, I mean Train, assured me that he’ll send word at every opportunity. I think for now everyone should claim some space for their family. We might be in here for a while.”
Allison went to find Cake. He and his wife Betty were standing at the door of the shack watching the sky.
“I need your help,” she said. “I don’t think we’ll have a problem accommodating everyone, but they’re scared, and I don’t know what to tell them.”
“Oh Sugar, you let Betty help you with this.” The older woman, Cake’s wife, wrapped her chubby arm around Allison. “Cupcake.” She pointed to her husband. “Get cooking. Nothing soothes a body like good ol’ home cooking.”
Betty knew everyone and introduced Allison personally. “Don’t know how that man survived before you came to work, tending the children, cleaning that monster of a house, and even planting a garden. Sugar, you do a right fine job taking care of the boss.”
“You do know my name is Allison?”
Betty let out a laugh that made her whole body shake. “TJ gave you your nickname a long time ago. All of us know you as Sugar.”
“My horse’s name is Sugar. I’m more comfortable with Allison.” She tried to smile through her insecurities.
“Don’t let a nickname cause you concern,” Betty said in a serious voice. “Just means you’ve been accepted into the family. You belong here.”
The children played in the shack. The thick smoke outside made it difficult to breath. The windows had to be closed. What was already a very warm room became unbearable. But thankfully the fire stayed in the far distance, well over the rise.
“Cake, I want you to get some ice and let the children eat it,” Allison said. “They’re starting to fuss because of the heat. If you point me in the right direction, I’ll fill up some carafes with water. If we add ice, I think we would all be grateful.”
He nodded and went to the icehouse. A few minutes later, you could hear laughter from the children. “Good thinking,” Betty said, patting Allison on the back.
Cake had food ready when the first men started returning from the fields. Black soot covered their faces. Allison watched for Joseph. She hadn’t realized hi
s position of authority. She heard pieces of conversation. Both men and women respected his decisions and followed orders without question.
When he came though the door, her heart raced, yet relief overwhelmed.
She grabbed a glass of cool water and a wet cloth. She rushed to him and led him to a chair. “Are you hurt?” She handed him the drink, took the cloth and laid it across his forehead. “Hungry? Cake has cornbread and chicken.”
He tipped the glass and drank all the water. “No, I’m going back out. I just wondered if you’ve heard from TJ.”
She sat in the chair next to him. “Not yet.” They looked at each other for a minute. “You look tired.”
He nodded. “I was tired before I left. The wind shifted though.”
“Then it’ll burn itself out?”
“We’re hoping.” Joseph took her hand in his. “Allison, we need to talk. I’ve seen you with TJ. I know you have feelings for him.”
“We can’t talk now.” She stood, but he held to her fingers and gently tugged her back down.
“I can’t go back out there and wonder what’s going to happen when TJ returns.”
“You’re my best friend, and I don’t want to hurt you. But I won’t lie to you either. I can’t explain my feelings for TJ. I don’t know what they are.” She touched his hand. “You go do your job and I’ll do mine. When this thing is over, we’ll figure out the rest.”
They walked to the door, and she stepped outside with him. Before he walked away, he leaned in to kiss her. She put her hand on his chest.
“When this is over.”
Joseph kissed her quickly and put his hat on. She smiled and turned away from him. “Well, hello.” Sissy had been standing right behind her.
“How come you’re kissin’ Train?” She took another bite of bread. Butter cream coated her fingers and greased her cheeks.
“A kiss is good luck.” She took Sissy’s hand and led her back inside.
Sissy nodded, accepting the easy answer.
Allison made a pallet for her and the children close to the front door of the shack so people wouldn’t have to look for her if they needed to leave. Sissy slept next to the wall and Michael, snuggled in a ball, lay tucked close to her body. Exhaustion overcame her too, and she fell asleep.
