by Taryn Plendl
“So I can stay?” She brought me back from my pity party of one.
“If you want to.” I tried to act nonchalant.
She stood up looking a little hurt and shrugged. “Good.” She grabbed her bag and headed down the hall to the spare bedroom without another word.
The guys and Ava returned with the pizza after a while and were thrilled that I agreed to let Talia stay and help. I could see it took a significant load off their minds. I was going to have to just suck it up.
***
“Do you need anything, Tom?” Talia asked after everyone had left. Trevor and Nick had gotten me to the bathroom and in bed. I didn’t know what I was going to do the next time I needed to go to the bathroom. The thought of Talia helping me get there was enough to send me into an anxiety attack.
“I’m good,” I lied, watching as she walked out of the room. Moments later, she came back in with a glass of water and my pain pills.
“Here you go.” She handed them to me and then the glass of water, watching me as I swallowed them. When I was finished, she set the glass down on the nightstand and stood up, looking at me. I couldn’t read her expression as she stared at me. Her blue eyes bore right to my core, sending a sense of sadness and vulnerability coursing though me—like a small child that lost their favorite toy—like she could see right into my soul. Before I could think of anything to say, she leaned down and kissed me so softly on the lips. It wasn’t a sensual kiss, but even so, the feel of her warm breath and the softness of her lips sent all sorts of erratic feelings racing through my body.
“Goodnight, Tom,” she whispered before turning and walking out the door. Holy Shit! I was stuck in this bed where I sure as hell couldn’t relieve the sudden pressure growing in my pants, and I couldn’t make it by myself to the bathroom for a cold shower. How in the hell could a small, feathery kiss have such an effect on me? It seemed to even overpower the nagging pain in my leg. “Oh, you’re in so much trouble,” I groaned.
I woke with a start. Sweat gathered along my forehead and upper lip. I tried to sit up, making a conscious effort to breathe through the pain from the cramp in my leg. It ached all the way down my foot—the foot that was no longer there. I finally managed to sit up, groaning from the soreness of my abdomen. “Fuck!” I sighed loudly. This shit hurt.
“Tom?” The hallway light turned on, and I could see Talia standing in the doorway. My angel. The light illuminated her hair as it cascaded over her shoulders. She was wearing a white tank top that hugged her curves like a glove and striped boxer shorts. Her legs seemed to go on forever. Her skin looked soft and pale in the light, and she was, in every way, my angel.
I reached for her, and she moved quickly toward me. “My leg hurts,” I croaked, not even feeling sorry for how weak I sounded.
“Where?” she asked, pulling the sheet down to see.
“I’m losing it, Talia.” I shook my head. She was going to think I’d lost my mind.
“Where does it hurt?” She looked at me, waiting patiently for my answer.
“My foot,” I whispered. “The fucking foot that isn’t even there anymore!” I watched her face, waiting to see her reaction to my crazy admission. She just nodded and began to rub my leg, slowly moving down toward my knee.
“Close your eyes, Tom. I want you to listen to me and visualize everything I’m doing.” I laid my head back and closed my eyes.
“I’m going to rub over your knee and down. I want you to visualize your healthy leg as it was before, and me massaging it. I’m moving down your calf now, just like on the right side.” I felt her other hand, warm and soft, on my right leg rubbing the same motions over my knee and down. She continued to move her hands down until she was at my ankle, still talking about both of my legs. It was so weird, but somewhere in my mind I could almost feel her rubbing both of them. She moved to my foot, and slowly, I started to feel better. The pain felt like it was gradually going away.
“How did you do that?” I asked, slowing my breathing down.
“I don’t know. I just did it in hopes that it would work. Today I went to talk to one of the doctors I work with about everything, and he mentioned that it wasn’t unusual to have some sort of sensation like you are, especially when the last thing you felt in that leg was pain.” She shrugged. “I just hoped it would work. It seems to be something the brain does. You aren’t going crazy, Tom. It happens. This is new to me, too. We just need to find what works.” She stood up and got me another pain pill. “Do you need to go to the bathroom?” She raised an eyebrow at me.
“No, I’m good.” I shook my head. I probably could have gone, but not bad enough to deal with more humiliation.
“Do you want me to stay until you fall asleep?” she asked softly. Hell no! If she stayed, I could guarantee that I wouldn’t be able to fall asleep. I could smell her, and it was doing weird things to my senses.
“Really, I’m better now. Thank you so much.” I squeezed her hand. She smiled as she stood.
“Holler if you need me.” I watched her walk out of the room, finally exhaling when the hall light turned off. She was going to be the death of me!
Chapter 7
Talia
I was so far out of my element here. I was in the middle of a struggle between Talia, the nurse and Talia, the woman. Tom was lying in a bed trying to recover from a horrific accident, and all I could think about was kissing him.
I did just that last night. Thank God I managed to pull myself back before freaking him out. The man was beautiful. Even after spending two weeks in bed, he still had retained the strong muscular planes of his chest. His stomach now bore a long scar down the middle, above his bellybutton, but nonetheless, still had the corrugated leanness of his flat abdomen. His legs were a beautiful sight all on their own. Even after the amputation, he had long powerful legs, thighs as hard and muscled as any professional athlete. I’m sure it was all the years of playing soccer.
I was in so much trouble!
I needed to get out of bed and check on Tom. Last night, after he had gone to sleep, my friend Sheila brought by a few things that I’d asked for. One was a shower seat. I was going to have to convince Tom to allow me to help him shower. Was it so wrong of me to get a little bit of a thrill at the idea?
The other thing was going to be extraordinarily helpful. I had asked for a knee walker—Tom could rest his left knee on it and use his right leg to get around. It was too hard for him to maneuver with crutches because of the cast on his left arm, so this was all I could think of to help him gain some mobility. He hadn’t said anything yet, but I knew it was killing him to depend on me, even though I wasn’t lying when I said I wanted to. I couldn’t imagine anywhere I’d rather be.
I opened the bedroom door and was startled to see him awake and sitting up in the bed. “Hey, good morning.” I smiled. His dark hair was messy, and he looked disheveled, but damn if he wasn’t still hot.
“I got something for you.” I held up my finger and went back to the living room to get the walker. I giggled at his surprise when I came back in.
“Where did you get that?” he asked as he looked it over.
“I have connections, remember?” It made me so happy to see a hint of excitement. “Ready to try it out? It may hurt a bit with the weight on your leg, so let me know if it’s too much.”
I parked it in front of him and put the brake on, helping him stand on his good leg. I watched him as he carefully placed his left knee on the padded seat, testing it out by placing weight on it.
“It hurts a bit, but I think it will work.” He smiled. “First stop … the bathroom.”
“I’ll wait here. Please ask if you need help,” I urged. He nodded and scooted slowly to the bathroom.
When the door finally opened to a smiling Tom, I asked if he was ready for a shower. The look on his face made me giggle. “Come on. I’m a nurse. I’ve seen it all before” I raised my eyebrows at him, knowing full well that I was planning on putting us both in bathing suits,
but it was fun to watch his discomfort for a minute.
“Honey, don’t worry. We’re going to wear swimsuits. Point me in the direction of yours and I’ll bring it to you.” I winked, and I could see the instant relief flood his face. After I brought him his swim trunks, I headed down the hall to put on my own swimsuit. I grabbed the shower seat and a plastic bag to tape over his stump to keep the soft dressing dry. I grabbed another one for his arm.
“Ready?” I knocked on the door.
“Shit, Talia, I don’t see how this is going to work,” he said through the closed door.
“Do you have your swimsuit on?” I asked.
“Yes, but …”
I opened the door to see him standing with the help of the walker. He wearing his swimsuit, and I froze. The man was exquisite—muscles that rippled down his arms, his flat stomach, and strong legs. Holy hell! “Um, this should help.” I pointed to the shower seat.
“Let me guess … connections, right?” He smiled briefly.
I put the seat in the middle of the large stand up shower and motioned him over. After he sat down, I knelt and wrapped the plastic around his stump. “Ready?” I stood up and waited for his approval. After her nodded, I turned around, dropped my robe outside the door and turned on the water. I held the detachable shower head away from us until the water warmed up and then turned back to face Tom.
“Are you okay?” I asked, noticing his jaw was tight, and he was gripping the handles of the seat. “Are you in pain?” He closed his eyes and shook his head. “You want me to continue?” I asked.
When he nodded, I took the warm spray slowly over his shoulders and stepped behind him. “Lean your head back.” I sprayed his hair and handed him the showerhead to hold while I washed his hair, taking extra care around the healing cut on his head. I gently massaged the shampoo into his scalp, rubbing soft circles around the base of his neck. I heard him groan, and my body responded all the way down to my core. I took the showerhead back from him and rinsed his hair.
I wet his back, taking the body wash and rubbing it between my hands. With careful strokes, I rubbed it over his shoulders and back. Adding more to my hands, I moved around to the front of him. I paused to take in his beautiful face. His eyes were closed, and his full lips were slightly parted. I had to hold myself back from leaning in and capturing them with mine. Why had I never kissed him before? All those times we spent wrapped in each other’s arms dancing. It would have been so natural.
I took my hands and began rubbing the body wash over his chest. I shuddered with the feeling of his hot, wet skin. His eyes opened with a harsh rush of breath. We stared into each other’s eyes as I leaned in closer to him, rubbing and washing his torso, dragging my hand softly over his healing incision, watching as he sucked in a sharp breath. My face was so close to his that I could feel his warm breath on my skin, and I could think of nothing else but kissing him. I knelt down and rubbed soap into his legs, finally breaking eye contact so I could watch what I was doing.
I was not prepared for the blatant evidence of his arousal pressing against his shorts. It sent a pull from my stomach all the way to my toes. I tried to focus on his legs—believe me I did—but holy shit, he was hiding something pretty damn impressive behind those shorts, and it was leaving little to the imagination.
“Talia?” his voice was low and soft. I looked up and could see the desire, mirroring mine, in Tom’s eyes.
I pulled myself up off of my knees and leaned in toward him, my body so terribly close to betraying me. “Yes?”
I could see his obvious internal struggle going on. One minute he was looking at me like he would devour me, and the next minute he was asking me to get him out.
I finished rinsing him without touching him again, knowing that whatever electric energy we had between us was gone … for now. After turning off the water, I pulled a towel down and helped him dry himself, carefully removing the plastic bags from his stump and arm, before returning to his room for some clothes. I could tell he didn’t want me to stay and help him get dressed, and I wanted to put some much needed distance between us, so I excused myself and headed back to the guest room to get dressed.
Sitting on the bed, I put my head in my hands and groaned. What the hell am I doing? I was here to help Tom get better, and all I could think about was climbing on for the ride of my life. It obviously had been way to long since I’d had the touch of a man.
My dating life had never been dull. I somehow had taken a break over the past few weeks. For the first time in an exceedingly long time, I was having fun with only one man. The sad thing was that I wasn’t even having sex with him. At this rate, I may need to change my Facebook status to “Batteries Dead from Overuse.”
This was going to be a long three weeks!
Chapter 8
Tom
“Shit.”
I struggled into my sweats and a t-shirt. I grabbed onto my knee walker and headed out into the living room.
“You okay?” I looked over and saw Talia standing in the kitchen, looking at me cautiously. She was biting her bottom lip nervously. What I would give to bite that lip myself.
“Yeah. I’m good. I don’t want to sit in bed all day, though.” I smiled. There was tension in the air, and I felt guilty for making it that way. I wanted Talia with every part of me, but I wasn’t about to trap her into something that she didn’t need to be in. I could see the desire in her eyes, and it killed me to not act on it, but I was broken in so many ways right now. She deserved better than this.
I sat down on the couch as she brought me a glass of juice and my meds, taking a minute to tuck the dangling part of my sweats up around my stump. “Thanks.” I turned as she was walking away. “Talia? I … um …” Before I could get anything out, the doorbell rang.
“Hey! Look who dragged his sorry ass out of bed?” Nick came in with an arm full of beer and wine. “Nothing says, ‘I mean business’ like using a shopping cart at the liquor store.” He put the alcohol in the fridge and headed over to the couch, smiling huge.
“What’s with the shit eating grin, Nick?” I asked, shaking my head.
“Oh, come on, tell me this face doesn’t make you smile!” he laughed, motioning at his face.
“Your face is just fine, but you'll have to put a bag over that personality,” Talia said as she came and sat down with us, winking at me.
“Nice.” I smiled and nodded. I loved her sarcasm, especially when it was aimed at Nick. Trevor and I had spent years dealing with his obnoxious behavior, and it was so satisfying to see someone on his level. I think he secretly liked the banter he made with Talia.
“What have you two been up to this morning?” He looked between us both.
I looked at Talia and smiled. Nick would shit himself if I told him we had taken a shower together—even with bathing suits.
“Not much.” I shrugged.
“Nice wheels, Tom!” Nick pointed at my walker. “I bet you’ll be picking up all the girls with those!”
I laughed. “Yeah, don’t be jealous, they’re all mine. What are you doing here in the middle of the day?”
“It wasn’t very busy, so I took some work home with me. I thought I’d come hang out here for a bit, make sure Talia was taking good care of you.” He grinned, and for a minute, I thought he might have seen right through me.
“Hey, if you’re going to be here for a bit, I need to run a couple of errands.” Talia stood and slipped down the hall. A few minutes later she came out with her damp hair pulled up into a ponytail and a pair of jeans that hugged her ass like a glove. Nick was blatantly checking her out. She said her goodbyes and left, leaving us both staring after her.
“Could you try not to ogle her, dumbass?” I hissed, feeling like a jerk when he looked at me with a shocked expression.
“Okay—first of all, I’ve been ogling Talia since the first time we met her. Second, when did you get so possessive of her? Is there something I should know?” He stood up and walked to the refrigera
tor, getting us each a bottle of water.
“No. Sorry, man, I’m just a bit edgy.” I blew it off, hoping he would buy it for now. I couldn’t explain what was going on to him when I didn’t even know myself.
We spent the next few hours watching TV, talking, and I dozed in and out. It was nice to have Nick here to just shoot the shit with, and not have to worry about anything. Nick and Trevor were the best friends I could have ever asked for. We all just clicked, like we’d known each other our entire lives.
When my parents died, they stepped up when so many others stepped back. They took me into their families without a second thought and had stood by me in every aspect of my life. It should be no surprise that this situation would be no different.
“Knock, knock!” We turned around to see Trevor and Ava come through the door with their hands full of food from the Italian restaurant down the street that we all love so much.
“Thank God you’re here! I’m starving!” Nick stood up and rushed over to help them set up the table just as Talia came back in.
“Hey! This is great! Tom will never feel better if he has to survive on my cooking.” She jumped in and helped get everything ready as I sat there doing nothing.
I pulled myself up and used my walker to roll to the table, clearly impressing everyone. It was pathetic.
***
The week had gone by without any huge issues. Talia arranged for me to start physical therapy to strengthen my legs and arms and prepare me for my eventual prosthesis. The exercises were tough and made my muscles sore. I tried not to complain, mostly because I was sick of Talia treating me like I was a child. The whole situation had emasculated me.
I had managed to not appear too needy until Sunday night when I woke with excruciating pain in my absent foot again. I was so sick of hearing about phantom pain. I was fucking losing it, and it just pissed me off!
By the time Talia came in my room, I had sweat dripping down my face from the pain. “Shit, Tom! Why didn’t you call for me?” She climbed on the bed, looking at me.
