by Vivi Holt
“Thank ya, Tom.”
Thomas turned to smile at him as he stepped back out into the cold night. “You’re welcome, Dusty. And what’s the worst that could happen? She says no, right?” He laughed as he walked away.
Dusty ran his hands through his hair. Thomas was right – it was time to tell Jane how he felt. He’d give her one last chance to tell him what was wrong. If she didn’t love him, didn’t want to marry him, he’d be better off knowing up front. Though the thought of that made him sick to his stomach.
Chapter Twenty-One
Early the next morning, Jane’s things were packed into the back of the wagon. As she embraced Genevieve, she wondered when she’d see her cousin again with winter on its way. She choked back tears and ducked her head before joining Dusty by the wagon. He seemed to have caught her melancholy mood, and his usual warm smile was nowhere to be seen. He helped her up, then climbed up and sat beside her as she adjusted her sun bonnet and folded her hands in her lap.
The sun was just beginning to peek over the horizon, which made everything seem bright and more colorful even in the chill morning air. She waved goodbye to the small group gathered to watch them leave, then turned to face forward as the tears fell again.
After a few minutes of silence, she wiped her eyes and shuffled closer to Dusty on the wagon seat. He was tense, but as she leaned into his side his entire body seemed to relax. He looked at her with a half-smile. “I know a nice spot to watch the sunrise, if’n yer interested.”
“Yes, please,” she replied, her voice thick with emotion.
Dusty steered the horses up a rise, and they lurched forward to get up a particularly steep bit before it evened out. Surrounded by evergreens, they were steeped in darkness and Jane could barely see beyond the horses’ ears. But soon they emerged into a clearing on top of a rocky outcropping that looked out over the river and to the mountains beyond. Sunlight flooded the area and lit them in its golden glow.
Jane’s breath caught. It was a stunning vista, and for a moment she forgot everything else. “It’s beautiful!”
Dusty smiled beside her. He pulled the team to a halt and released the reins. The horses dropped their heads in search of grass to eat. Several minutes passed in companionable silence as they watched the sun rise over the jagged peaks in the distance, lighting up the far reaches of the valley as it climbed.
There was a strength and confidence in Dusty that put Jane at ease, as though nothing could shake him. As if she could tell him anything and still he’d be there, unchanging, strong and sure. She knew she had to tell him the truth. He deserved that.
“Jane,” began Dusty, facing her and taking her hands in his calloused ones. “Ya know … leastways, I think ya do … how I feel ‘bout ya.”
Her heart raced and her breath caught in her throat. “Well … I …”
“I care for ya deeply. And I wanna spend my life with ya. But lately … I ain’t sure ya feel the same way. There’s somethin’ on yer mind ya ain’t seen fit to share with me. That’s yer business, I guess, but I believe a husband and wife should not only love each other, but also share everythin’. If’n ya don’t feel as though ya can share things with me, or if’n ya don’t care for me the way I do for ya, please, just come clean and tell me now.”
Jane saw the pain in his eyes and shuddered, knowing she’d caused it. She didn’t know how he’d react, but she had to tell him the truth. The secret would always be there between them if she didn’t, and she wanted nothing more than to close that gap. She drew a deep breath, held it a moment, then spoke. “Dusty, there is something I need to tell you.”
“Yeah?”
She told him everything – about her parents, what they’d done and how things had ended, and about Missoula, her engagement and how the school board and superintendent had treated her. Dusty sat quietly beside her, watching and listening intently.
When she finished, he sighed. “That’s yer secret then? That’s all of it?”
“Yes. I know it’s a lot to take in, and I know you might need some time to think it all through. I wasn’t a part of what my parents did – I didn’t know what they were up to, and I’ve never stolen a thing in my life. Maybe that doesn’t matter to you and you still won’t want anything to do with me because it’s in my blood or some such. But I hope you’ll give me a chance to prove myself. I …” She took a deep breath to continue.
But Dusty cut her off. “Jane darlin’, I’m so sorry for all ya’ve gone through. That’s a heap for ya to deal with.” He took her hands in his and stroked the backs of them with his thumbs. “But it don’t change the way I feel about ya, if that’s what yer concerned ‘bout.”
“It doesn’t?”
“No, ‘course not. I ain’t gonna hold the sins of yer parents against ya. Ain’t yer fault who ya was born to. We just do the best we can with the trials we’re given, it’s all anyone can do.” He smiled and lifted a hand to trail a finger down her cheek where a tear had fallen, wiping it dry.
“Dusty, I …”
“Jane, I thought ya didn’t want me. But I can see now ya was just scared. Can I dare to hope that maybe ya feel about me the way I do about ya?” His kind eyes brimmed with the question he longed to ask.
“Oh Dusty, you’re all I could ever want,” whispered Jane, her cheeks burning.
He broke into a wide grin and tipped his hat back with one finger. “Well then, would ya marry me?”
She laughed. “Yes, my darling Dusty, I will.” Then she paused. “But there’s something else I should ask you?”
“Anythin’, darlin’, anythin’.”
“What is your real name?!”
Dusty froze, then began laughing and couldn’t stop. All his tension, all his worry poured out in that laugh until it was gone. Finally, once he’d caught his breath, he smiled and looked her in the eye. “Damon. My name’s Damon.”
“Damon.” He loved to hear her say his name. “So why Dusty?”
Dusty grimaced. “Well, seein’ as we’re bein’ honest … I used to be quite the night-ripper. Drinkin’, gambling’, carryin’ on. When I came west, I’d fallen in with a bad crowd and learned everythin’ they wanted to teach me. And one mornin’ my boss in Fort Worth found me face down in the dust, stone drunk.”
“Oh my.”
“Yep. But the man took me into his home, cleaned me up and taught me how to avoid temptation. And he made me work – oh, how he made me work. He told me he wanted me too tired to raise any Cain. But he got me to clean up my act for good. He never stopped callin’ me Dusty, though. I guess I kept the name to remind me what the good Lord brought me out of.”
“And I’m so glad He did,” Jane whispered. She leaned over and kissed him on the lips, her hand curling around to cup the back of his head. He returned her kiss, tangling his fingers in her thick hair.
“But ya can call me whatever ya want,” he said when they broke the kiss.
“I suppose I could get used to Damon, though I’ve grown quite fond of Dusty myself.” Jane smiled and ran her fingers over his beard, cupping his face in the palm of her hand.
He turned his head to kiss her palm, then sat up straight. “We’d best be gettin’ back, I suppose. Though I could stay here a long while without tirin’ of it.” His eyes twinkled as he lifted the reins and brought them down on the team’s back.
Jane leaned against him and gazed up at the colorful sky. “I could stay here forever.”
Chapter Twenty-Two
The church sanctuary was silent. Jane’s gaze swept across the little faces lined up at the provisional desks. “As you all know, I’m getting married in two days, and I’ll be moving to Paradise Valley.” Her words were met with pouts and downcast eyes.
“So I wanted to give each of you a gift.”
Suddenly, every child in the room sat up straight, and frowns turned to smiles.
“Yes, I thought you might like that.” She laughed, then pulled the string bags out from behind her desk, setting them on top.
“Please come forward when I call your name.”
She gave out pencils, crocheted winter caps, scarves, socks, sweets and poems written by hand. Finally, the only ones left without a gift were the Thompson children. Emily, Hubert and Harvey sat quietly in their bedraggled clothing, staring at the floor. She frowned. They thought she’d forgotten them. Her heart swelled with love for the poor children who were so used to being overlooked and going without. “Emily Thompson?”
Emily looked up with wide eyes and shot to her feet. She hurried forward then stopped still with her hands behind her back.
“This is for you, Emily, my dear. And I want you to know you are a special girl, and I’ve so enjoyed teaching you and getting to know you.”
She handed Emily a long red calico house dress with sprigs of blue and white flowers. The collar was lined with lace, and the sleeves puffed at the shoulders.
Emily’s eyes grew as round as saucers. “This is for me?” she whispered in awe.
“Yes, my dear – and so is this.” Jane pulled a long coat from the bag, along with a knitted cap and matching scarf, petticoats, stockings and gloves.
Emily’s eyes filled with tears and she wiped at them with the back of her hand. “Thank ya,” she murmured. She took the clothes and shuffled back to her seat.
“Hubert Thompson?” Jane gave him a set of trousers, undershirt, buttoned shirt, vest, coat, cap, scarf, socks and gloves. He took the bounty, speechlessly nodding his thanks. When Harvey had his turn, he yelled with glee and danced around, holding his suit in the air for all to see, then ran back to his desk, exclaiming his wonder over the gift all the way.
The other children in the room crowded around the Thompson kids to inspect their new clothing. Jane worried there’d be jealousy, that maybe the children wouldn’t understand why she was favoring the Thompsons, but she needn’t have worried. All the children graciously congratulated the Thompsons, and she choked back tears as she watched them.
Jane saw the new schoolmaster sneak into the back of the classroom and tip his hat with a smile. She waved, then called the children to order. “Thank you, children – please be seated.”
The students returned to their seats, waiting patiently for her to continue.
“In closing, I want to thank you all for welcoming me as your schoolmistress. I’m sorry to be leaving you all so soon, but I’m excited to introduce you to Mr. Elwood, who comes to us from Bannack. I’ll miss each of you, but remember, I’m not far away and I’ll see you around town from time to time. I’ll be anxious to find out how you’re getting along, and you’re all welcome to write me – I’d love to hear from you.”
Mr. Elwood stepped forward and introduced himself. Jane moved to the back of the room and a wave of sadness swept through her. She drew in a quick breath, then turned and walked out of the church.
***
Dusty and Thomas rode toward the barn, having spent the past day and night searching for longhorns that had been scattered by a pack of wolves. They’d found all save a few, and Dusty was exhausted. Still, his thoughts were occupied by only one thing now that they were back: his Jane. He still couldn’t quite believe she’d said yes. For so long now, he’d been sure he’d lose her. It was such a relief to discover she loved him and wanted to marry him – he couldn’t believe his luck.
Finally back at the barn, Thomas and Dusty fed and watered the horses. Dusty paid particular attention to rubbing down and grooming Rebel – it had been a rough twenty-four hours and the horse had done everything he’d asked. He patted the stallion lovingly on the shoulder, and the animal lay down to roll on his back in the fresh hay, his legs kicking with glee. Dusty laughed and strode from the barn, eager to see Jane.
Birds were beginning to call, but it was still gray outside and a blanket of dark clouds covered the valley. It looked as though it would rain or perhaps even snow, it was hard to say. He saw Jane peering out through the curtains of the guest room in the ranch house where she was staying until the wedding. Then she disappeared, and he hoped it meant she was on her way outside.
Sure enough, a minute later she flew out the door and into the yard, where Dusty was talking together with Thomas, Vaquero and Dan. His gaze found hers and he smiled. He was tired, covered in dirt and grime, had scratches on his face and probably dark circles under his eyes. And yet she was still eager to see him. Yep, he was a lucky man.
He nodded to the other men and went to her with a grin, taking his hat off as he did.
She took his calloused hand in hers with a shy smile. “Dusty, it’s so good to see you. I’m glad you’re back – I was worried …”
He kissed her hard on the mouth, taking her breath away. She put her arms around his neck to pull him closer, deepening the kiss.
Whooping and catcalls broke through their perfect moment and she pulled away with a shy smile. “Now that’s a welcome home!” cried Thomas, slapping Dusty soundly on the back as he walked by.
Dusty laughed and Jane ducked her head as her cheeks flamed red.
Chapter Twenty-Three
Sunday morning dawned bright and sunny. The frozen ground sparkled in the wan sunlight with a thin layer of frosty snow as its covering. Jane’s pulse quickened at the thought of what lay ahead that day. She leaped out of bed and hurried to Genevieve’s room, peering around the door frame.
Genevieve sat alone, propped up in bed on a bank of pillows. Thomas had no doubt gone out already to do the morning chores. Jane ran in and jumped onto the bed beside her with a giggle. “I’m getting married today!” she cried.
Genevieve laughed and embraced her friend. “Yes, you are. And what a perfect day it is.”
Her stomach protruded round and hard beneath the covers, and Jane laid a hand gently on top of it, hoping to feel some kind of movement. “Has the baby been kicking you?”
“Yes. Right in my bladder.” Genevieve laughed and put her hand over Jane’s, then groaned and leaned back. “I’m ready for the little rascal to come out and meet the world.”
“I’m sure you are. Do you need help getting ready?”
Genevieve chuckled. “I’m supposed to be helping you get ready, not the other way around.”
Jane shook her head. “I don’t mind. I’m just glad you’ll be there. You’re the only family member who’ll see me married, and I’m so excited you’re here to share it all with me.” She sighed and her throat tightened. She wished Aunt Priscilla could be there – at least she’d been able to send her a telegram with the good news. It had been so long since she’d been with any of her family beside Genevieve.
She missed them so much – and her parents most of all. People seemed to think that since her parents were criminals she hadn’t grieved their loss. But she’d loved them. They’d always been preoccupied and unhappy, fought constantly and snapped at her whenever she spoke a word out of turn, but they were the only parents she’d ever known. Despite everything, she wished they could have been at the church that day to watch her walk down the aisle and become Mrs. Damon Lewis. She frowned, fighting the tears that threatened.
“Do you miss them?” asked Genevieve. “Your parents, I mean.”
Jane’s gaze met hers, eyes wide. “How did you know?”
Genevieve patted her hand. “You just looked so sad. I know I miss mine, especially Mother. Sometimes it’s hard to remember what Father was like, he died so long ago. But Mother was my closest friend – it was us against the world. I know how hard it is to lose your folks – you and I have that in common.”
Jane’s eyes brimmed and she swallowed hard. “Of course. I sometimes forget that others have gone through something similar, although it’s hard for me to talk about what happened to mine, since most people don’t understand. But I miss them, I really do. I love it here, but every now and then I get this pain in my heart when I think about home.” She choked back a sob.
Genevieve laid her head against Jane’s shoulder. “I know what you mean.”
Jane sniffled. “But enough of that. Today�
��s my wedding day, so no more tears. Well, maybe a few more, but only happy ones.”
“Absolutely.” Genevieve squeezed her shoulder and pushed herself out of bed with a grunt. “I really don’t think I could get any bigger,” she grumbled. “Honestly, Dr. Underhill says I’m supposed to have a few more weeks of this, but I’m worried I’ll bust first.”
Jane chuckled and climbed out of the bed behind her. “Well, you look beautiful.”
“You’re sweet.” Genevieve reached for the gown she’d laid out for the wedding.
“I’m going to get dressed.” Jane skipped to the door.
“I’ll be there in a few minutes to help with your hair,” Genevieve called after her.
Jane hurried back to the guest room and stood before the looking glass. She slipped off the housecoat she’d borrowed from Genevieve and pulled on her brand-new chemise. She ran her fingers over its smooth surface with a smile. As she pulled on her drawers and petticoats, she began to hum “Happy Day,” one of her favorite hymns. She wondered if there’d be anyone at the church with an instrument who might play it for them after the wedding.
Before long, she was dressed in her favorite sky-blue gown. It cinched tight around her waist, with a high collar, long sleeves, and a full skirt with a demi-train. Everything she was wearing was new – Dusty had bought her several bolts of linen, muslin and cotton, and she’d sewn herself house dresses, a black damask for special occasions, petticoats, undergarments, handkerchiefs, bed linens and anything else she thought they might need in the cottage. Added to what Genevieve and the other women had given her, and she had more pretty things to wear now that she’d had before the fire.
Just thinking of the cottage made her head spin. She was so excited to move in and begin their life together. She hoped she’d be up to the challenge of managing her own home. No one had ever relied on her before to take care of them, but she was looking forward to showing Dusty, and herself, how well she could do it.
